Comedy lines that just tickle the shit out of you Mk.II

Started by Benjaminos, March 10, 2020, 08:43:20 AM

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petril

Quote from: Rizla on July 22, 2020, 02:31:38 PM
I seem to remember a v funny scene where one of the characters got stoned and danced to the QI theme, or did I make that up?

that was real. "The Ganj" is at the end of this vid: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WCfLpJrbF1w

Utter Shit

I think one of them says the QI theme tune is his favourite reggae track.

A mate of mine from uni who #happenstobeblack told a story once about being at a house party and a young posh bloke got chatting to him and very earnestly told him that he was really into reggae. My mate has no particular interest in reggae beyond thinking Bob Marley songs are good just like 90% of the rest of the world, but as this guy was friendly he just stayed with him right up to the point that he said "I suppose if you pushed me, I suppose I'd say that my favourite reggae singer would have to be Shaggy".

The Mollusk


ollyboro


bgmnts

From the film Burn After Reading:

QuoteOsbourne: If you ever carried out your proposed threat, you would experience such a shitstorm of consequences, my friend! Your empty little head would be spinning faster than the wheels of your Schwinn bicycle back there!
Chad: (chuckles) You think that's a Schwinn!

ollyboro

"This is probably how the Manson Family started" - Mark Corrigan playing Spin The Bottle.

The Mollusk

Been rewatching Spaced recently for the first time in over a decade (it's aged way better than I assumed it had) and there's a bit where Mike says something lengthy and insightful to Tim as they're leaving the flat, which Tim is clearly not in the mood to hear, so he just responds with "Get in the van you big ape" and Mike grins straight back into simple mode and goes "Okay then!" It's so fucking good.

Poirots BigGarlickyCorpse

"Holy cocksucking Christ! I've fell out the motherfucking window!"

Puce Moment

Quote from: Utter Shit on July 22, 2020, 03:08:17 PM
I think one of them says the QI theme tune is his favourite reggae track.

A mate of mine from uni who #happenstobeblack told a story once about being at a house party and a young posh bloke got chatting to him and very earnestly told him that he was really into reggae. My mate has no particular interest in reggae beyond thinking Bob Marley songs are good just like 90% of the rest of the world, but as this guy was friendly he just stayed with him right up to the point that he said "I suppose if you pushed me, I suppose I'd say that my favourite reggae singer would have to be Shaggy".

At least three lols in that post

Poirots BigGarlickyCorpse

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AohfDz3COXE

"Arnie, you're supposed to be filming people coping with the loss of their church!"

"And how am I supposed to do that? Do I have a magic lens that can see into people's souls? Well yours would be black, Kent, black as the ace of spades!"

DrGreggles

Richie (impersonating Ted Rogers): "3-2-1!!! 3-2-1!!! God, I bet he's good in bed."

bgmnts


Bently Sheds

Mark Corrigan to Jez: "You're know you're too old to be a rent boy? There's not a big market for rent... men."

It's not a particularly brilliant line, but the way David Mitchell delivers it with that slight pause between Rent and Men and the look of disappointment in his face as he says it just sets me off.

Stoneage Dinosaurs

From the Armando Iannucci shows - "You drive a sports car but you look like a worm on a diamond"

Cuellar

Haha! I was watching them again not two days ago and laughed aloud at that very line. That whole speech to the new middle-aged men is great, and brilliantly delivered.

petril

on Iannucci:

the sketches where he's narrating everything including the dialogue, and the actors are lip synching. not one line, but one technique that just adds a nice level of silliness to everything. Especially the Orangegod, given his own background

Seedsy

We have David Silk on the line..
David, are you wearing any silk?

"no, I'm naked"

Cuellar

Been watching What We Do In The Shadows and I've been really enjoying Matt Berry playing the character he always plays.

In the orgy episode where he's showing off the porn films he made, the clip of the gay one just really tickles me. Matt Berry's incredibly camp voice, the way he drags on the cigarette, the fact that the other guy's name is Philip. I dunno. Just love the whole package:

https://youtu.be/CByV6BBnT3I?t=64

edit: wrong video, that one cuts most of it out!

https://youtu.be/IYNI63DPT8k?t=66

kalowski

Anyway round about now, I usually have a Pot Noodle! It's tasty. Ummm! Doesn't that look good! It's a tasty delicious little snack! Ummmm! Let's try some, shall we? Doesn't that look absolutely yumscious! Ohhhh! Let's try some, shall we?

samadriel

"Tim, they've got your wife!"
"But I'm not maaarried!"
"You are now - to AMERICA."

bgmnts

QuoteBeckenbauer obviously a bit of a surprise there.


Ornlu

Quote from: Seedsy on November 02, 2020, 05:28:20 PM
We have David Silk on the line..
David, are you wearing any silk?

"no, I'm naked"

The way Coogan's smile just immediately falls into annoyance and discomfort is excellent.

~~~

As for mine - on a Cum Town clip about the /r/smalldickproblems subreddit, when Mullen sings someone's post like Linkin Park's In The End.

Small dick/
I don't know why...

Not from a comedy show but Ken Dodd's answer to Dr Anthony Clare's opening question on In The Psychiatrist's Chair:

"Ken Dodd, you wear a comic mask. Does it worry you that today you are going to remove that mask, strip yourself bare, reveal your innermost thoughts?"

"Not at all, in fact the idea leaves me feeling totally tattifilarious and full of plumptiousness."

lipsink

In Peep Show when a drunk Jez says: "I'm going to carry on drinking until they catch Jaws the shark"


Marner and Me

Inbetweeners, Jay lets off the flare

Will comes out with in a low almost snarl 'why the fuck did you do that?'

Fr.Bigley

Not a Simpsons fan overall but the episode with "Love day" gets me.

Homer: "You trash-eatin' stink bags!"
Uh-oh.

Garbage men: What did you call us?

H: I don't know. A lot of people were yelling stuff.

GM:Yeah, you called us "trash-eating stink bags." Didn't you learn anything from Love Day?

H:That was yesterday, moron...


Hoodenter

Quote from: C_Larence on March 10, 2020, 07:25:38 PM
They showed the episode of the simpsons with Rodney Dangerfield as Mr Burns' long lost son.

Burns: You, Foodbag.  Do you have a son?
Homer: Yes, sir, I do.
Burns: And is he a constant disappointment?  Does he bring home nitwits
       and make you talk to them?
Homer: Oh, all the time!  Have you ever heard of this kid Milhouse?
       He's a little wiener...
Burns: Fascinating.  Good night.

For some reason Homer asking Burns if he's ever heard of Milhouse is so perfectly funny.



I loved that episode! which season was it again?

samadriel