An all new classic ads thread!

[Glebe]

This is something I've been intending to start for a bit, a new classic ads thread! Will include the usual CaB favourites (Whole Nut/If You like a lot of chocolate on your biscuit/We hope it's chips/Daddy or chips etc.), but I'm gonna start out with a few that had a particular impact on me (some famous, some obscure), though there are many others below that I also love and are very nostalgic to me too. Growing up in Dublin, as well as national station RTÉ we also had BBC Northern Ireland, UTV and then C4, and later Sky.

Couple of ads I remember as a wee lad... Birds Eye potato waffles is one many CaBbers of a certain age will recall, but there was also a Rowntree Jelly Tots ad that I can't find that featured a load of people in animal suits etc. singing this song. I remember my brother singing it as a young child. The YouTube user who posted the song gives some info about it under the video.

Choc-wise, the Cadbury's Fruit and Nut ads with Frank Muir were also memorably strange, this is the one I particularly remember as a young nipper. Of course there's also Whole Nut, which utilised Harry Belafonte's 'Day-O (The Banana Boat Song)', as did the later Trio ads. Then of course there were the Fudge ads, which were just enough to provide me with an advertorial treat as a child! As for Curly Wurly, I think I was more just aware of Terry Scott advertising them then seeing any ads as a kid.

Staying with chocolate/sweets etc., there were of course the Cadbury's Carmel ads with the sexy rabbit, and of course Cadbury's Flake, with it's memorable power-balled tune! And of course there's the legendary, nightmare-inducing Kinder ad... neonscrubblie!

The Kit Kat 'You can't sing, you can't play,' ad featuring familiar face Gavin Richards is another much-loved old chestnut and the pandas one is another classic, but one my favourite ads ever is this one, which I couldn't find when I looked for it before so it must have been taken down from YouTube at the time. Very clever and nicely done. There's also this one, with Roy Kinnear and Su Pollard, oh and this... it's all coming back to me now, folks!

An ad that made an impact on me as a child, purely for the music (and my brother loved it too), was this one for Castrol GTX. I actually only recently found out that it's a piece by Mahler. Then there's Limmy favourite Fry's Turkish Delight... 'Full of Eastern promise!' There's something really dreamy and mystical about some ads from that era.

Another advertisement that really affected me as a kid was this Guinness commercial, 'Big Wave'. I'm sure I remember it being played at the cinema, but I only found out in recent years that it was an Irish-made advert and probably not shown elsewhere. Christy Moore alludes to it in his song 'Delerium Tremens' ('As I sat lookin' up the Guinness ad I could never figure out/How your man stayed up on the surfboard after fourteen pints of stout'). And on the subject of alcohol, here's an ad for Harp Lager that greatly amused when it came out.

Staying with Irish ads for a moment, there was one for Liga biscuits that was a cartoon of a mother and her infant; the child goes "I want my Liga!" and the mother says, "Kids these days, so demanding!" or something. I can only find this variation on the ad. Then there was the Lyons Tea ads with the extremely non-PC minstrel characters... here's a very early one from the '60s, they used the same theme for years. And on the subject of politically incorrect Irish commercials, there's this Kimberley Mikado ad with late Dublin comedienne Maureen Potter, though I remember this more innocuous one better.

What next... oh yeah, Kia Ora and Um Bongo (covering a lot of obvious ones for the sake of completion here)... used to love this Smiths Crisps ad. The  Tizer 'I'se Got the Ize' ads (here's one that seems most familiar to me) were intriguingly odd... Time Bandits star David Rappaport appeared in an earlier Tizer ad, btw.

Always loved the Scotch Video Tape ad, featuring the voice of Brian 'Summer Wine' Wilde! What else... more obvious ones, Milk Tray, Roses (which adapts The Scaffold's 'Thank U Very Much')... speaking of boxed chocolates, I've just remembered the Quality Street 'Magic Moments' ads... crikey, it's Neil Innes! Isn't that Carry On's Jack Douglas in this one?

Ridley Scott's famous Hovis ad... while this Levi's 'Wonderful World' ad is deservedly remembered, Scott's late brother Tony directed this one... I was in my early teens when this came out and had a massive crush on the beach chick, me and a friend used to sit by the video recorder waiting for the ad to come on!

The Milky Bar ads with the Milky Bar Kid, Opal Fruits (they're back!), Club 'if you like a lot of chocolate on your biscuit, and Lub a Club... the shocking Robertson's Marmalade ad... the Smash robots, lest we forget... Birds Eye steakhouse grills ("We hope it's chips!", Mental Mickey!), McCain's 'Daddy or chips?'... the Colgate Madness one, and here's an Aquafresh one that Raymond Briggs must have been involved with... Outspan, with the sexy woman going into the tent (I think that's an updated version of the original)... oh yeah, the Cornetto, 'Just one Cornetto' ads of course...

Blimey, there's a lot to get through. Sugar Puffs, with Henry McGee... Bran Flakes, 'They're tasty', with Gordon Kaye of course! the Weetabix gang, featuring the voice of Bob Hoskins... the annoying Cocoa Pops ads (this one features Brian Wilde again!).

The JR Hartley Yellow Pages ad is another much-loved classic... and forum member buzby would never let me away with forgetting this (good old Cribbins!)... they were also the BT 'It's for you!' ads... oh yeah and the BT Maureen Lipman ads, which featured the likes of Richard Wilson, Miriam Margolyes and Bernard Bresslaw.

Shake n' Vac, we hardly knew ye! Matey... Fairy Liquid, 'Hands that do dishes', and here's one with Nanette Newman who was the face of the brand during the '80s... Bassett's Allsorts ("One too many..."), ads, which featured Chris Tarrant earlier on.

What else... ah yes, the Oxo Family, with Linda Bellingham and the Bisto 'Never in a month of Sundays' ad... as reassuringly middle-class '80s as Fred Basset in The Mail on Sunday!

Monster Munch... Tudor Crisps ("For Tudor, I'd climb a mountain!"), Maynard's Wine Gums ("Hoots, mon!"), Chewits, Milky Way ("Good old Blue, he took the Milky Way!!"), Creme Egg with Spitting Image, Trebor Extra Strong Mints (Stephen Fry!)... the insane Rowntree's Fruit Pastilles 'You can't help it' ad brought up a few related videos of earlier Fruit Pastille ads I'd forgotten about, namely this and this. Oh yeah, Polo ads voiced by Peter Sallis.

Before I forget, the Wispa ads with various sitcom, etc. actors, the Smith & Jones one is probably remembered best but among others (including Smith and Peter Cook!) there's also Arthur Lowe and John Le Mesurier, Windsor Davies and Michael Knowles and (YES!) Ruth Madoc and Simon Cadell!

Nearly there (I think!)... let's have a few milk ads... the classic "Acrrington Stanley? Who're they?!", the incredibly distressing 'Them bones' one (if you've seen the film Pin...) and the amusing "It's the milkman!"

Mustn't forget Tetley Tea, with the voice of Brian Glover, also Typhoo ads with Su Pollard and Frankie Howerd, oh yeah as previously posted by Tony Tony Tony, here's Pollard in a Lyons Maid ad. And since we're talking ice creams/pops, there's this Irish ad for HB's Fat Frog. If only I could find the Thataway ad!

Ferrero Rocher, "Ambassador, you're really spoiling us", obviously, ffs... the Vauxhall 'Once driven, forever smitten' ads featuring 'Layla'... those Philadelphia ads with those two familiar actresses (Sara Crowe and Ann Bryson apparently)... those old Flora Margarine ads voiced by Terry Wogan... Lurpak Butter series of ads animated by Aardman and featuring the voice of Penelope Keith... the Vitalite ad, that uses 'Israelites'... Irish folks might remember this Kerrygold ad... this Country Life Butter ad is vaguely familiar...

If you're still with me... this Knorr Soup ad scared the fuck out of me with it's turnip-headed scarecrow... Knorr Stock Cubes... here's a "pea and ham!" version.

Anyone remember Ovaltine, "Ovaltina, now we see her..."? Very strange indeed. Müller Rice, "This is he captain of your ship..." dubbed European ad?

I can't really find a decent UK Mr. Proper/Mr. Clean ad ("Mr. Proper cleans so clean, you can really see yourself!"). Yeah make up your mind Yul Brynner, Proper or Clean? Anyway, here's Mr. Sheen, with the voice of Willy Rushton, surely? And Mr. Muscle.

Okay, a few more. Daz Doorstep Challenge with Danny Baker (later Shane Richie)... Clearasil Lotion ("My sister's a greaser!") with Patsy Palmer as said greaser... oh one more thing, this Toys "R" Us advert which used to always be on Sky... for me and a mate, Jeffrey the Giraffe became Jeffrey Dahmer, and together we collaborated to twist the jingle into "There's millions of Jeffreys all under America's roof... they're called serial killers, serial killers, serial killers!"

Right, that's your lot, please feel free to contribute. I know there's fucking tons more ads of note, loads with comedians and that, but I think I've fried my brain for the moment as it is. There was one for Hovis or something with a granddad doing a trick with his hat ("Round the back!"),  and one for some drink with an alien going "Do no fail us!" Any thoughts?

[Chollis]

THEY'RE GONNA TASTE GREAT

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4S6N_gQPYIM&ab_channel=TheAwesomePandaLPs

[Glebe]

Fuck's sake, forgot all about Tony the Tiger!

Oh yeah, Get busy with the fizzy!

And P-P-Pick up a Penguin!

[jobotic]

A while back there was a thread about adverts and someone posted a link to a site which contained ones that weren't on youtube.

For intensely private and personal reasons I was looking for a Rumbelows ad in which a George Formby type sings a song about their deals, ending with "Have You Rumbled It?".

Any idea what the site was? Cheers.

[Glebe]

Can't help there jobotic, soz.

In the meantime:

Allied Dunbar Trouble Ahead 1995.

Scottish Widows - The Maze.

[dr beat]

Well of course we need to represent Viv Stanshall...wot no Mr Cadbury's Parrot? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7uPzoh4oS1I

And of course Ruddles...https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E0EoOlVDq4c

Back to Mr CP, is that Arabella Weir? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HSkbP_xyOtI

[buzby]

Always loved the Scotch Video Tape ad, featuring the voice of Brian 'Summer Wine' Wilde!

<QI Klaxon>
We covered this in a thread a couple of years ago. The voice in the 80s Scotch 'Archie' adverts was Deryck 'Please, Sir!' Guyler. In the 90s they used other voices, including Richard Wilson. The 'Not Fade Away' ad you linked to is a mid-80s Guyler one.

According to the BFI it was Guyler.
The skeleton's name was Archie. They were directed by Bill Mather at Aardman, their first TV ad job.

This (non-singing) ad from 1987 is clearly Guyler:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M2Db1cuMqI8
There was another series of Archie adverts made in the early 90s directed by Gerry Anderson that mostly centred on inserting him into old footage (1966 World Cup trophy presentation, Moon Landing etc) that used other voices, including Richard Wilson

Here's a Wilson one: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H5IJ2m6fc10
Sounds very different to Guyler.

Here's a page on Anderson's website that covers his 80/90s advertising career, including a bit on the Scotch ads.
https://www.gerryanderson.co.uk/gerry-anderson-adverts/

There was one for Hovis or something with a granddad doing a trick with his hat ("Round the back!")

Roll us your cap, Uncle Stan, a 1983 ad for the British Dairy Council, directed by Dick Clement, no less. It inspired a terrible song by the prolific Wirral-based terrible songwriter Don Woods which got a lot of airplay on Norman Thomas' Breakfast Show on Radio City at the time.

[buzby]

A while back there was a thread about adverts and someone posted a link to a site which contained ones that weren't on youtube.

For intensely private and personal reasons I was looking for a Rumbelows ad in which a George Formby type sings a song about their deals, ending with "Have You Rumbled It?".

Any idea what the site was? Cheers.

TVARK?
The 'Have you Rumbled it?' ads I remember were from 88/89 and voiced by Alexei Sayle. The previous 'We'll keep you in touch' campaign from the mid-80s was voiced by Hugh Laurie (and Peter 'The voice of the Book' Jones before him). They did some musical ones but they were part of the early 90s 'Don't pay any more, Mrs Moore' campaign.

Back to Mr CP, is that Arabella Weir? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HSkbP_xyOtI

Helen 'Mrs. Miggins/KYTV's Anna Daptor' Atkinson-Wood.

[dr beat]

Helen 'Mrs. Miggins/KYTV's Anna Daptor' Atkinson-Wood.

Ah yes, so it is.  Wasn't quite sure.

[Gulftastic]

'Mints...are meant to be like this.....'

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UMLILUnRD9I

[Norton Canes]

Rimsky-Korsakov!!

Just utterly superb.

[Elderly Sumo Prophecy]

[tag]Paul's toilet blocked up by local kid's shite[/tag]

[buzby]

Break The Sound Barrier
From the later 'Subterranean Homesick Blues parody/Misheard Lyrics' campaign:
The Skids
Desmond Dekker

Is it live, or is it Memorex?

[DrGreggles]

[ProvanFan]

Reincarnation? Mine's a Beamish Red.

[dr beat]

Glebe. this is fantastic timing given that the multinational Agents of Mammon (not just Lewis or Asda, now Amazon, Lego) are now unleashing upon us.

Trying to look for some good ones from the 80s/90s for partworks (you know, free binder complete with a cold fusion unit, first one 50p, then the next 4000 £10 and if you don't get them YOU WILL DIE).

Also, mints.  Mr Soft:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DGrffn_LKzE

and a very of its time 80s/90s ad for XXXX mints: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YrFVF1T1Klc.  Do you get mints ads on TV now? Maybe if we get mints ads back we could try and do something about the INF treaty?

[non capisco]

Oh yeah, Get busy with the fizzy!

Must you torment me once more with that dead eyed old nan? At least one other CaB poster has revealed that she terrified them too, IT IS NOT JUST ME.

Excellent thread, Glebe. Finally a CaB adverts thread I can weigh in on without fear of losing my job tangentially sucking Satan's cock.

[non capisco]

Most of CaB is looking well these days

[Clatty McCutcheon]

The Prudential advert which was a playground meme before anyone had ever heard of a meme:

"I want to be...a treeee"

https://youtu.be/M-skHC84AhU?t=28

And from a couple of years later, a pre-Fast Show Mark Williams and Jo Unwin (Mrs Chris Morris).

https://youtu.be/V9DIDMeOJlY

"We wanna be able to go out once in a whoil"

[jobotic]

Here's the bastard

https://www.hatads.org.uk/catalogue/record/dcc79ee3-de13-4c38-b826-a99c2e0c5319

[petril]

Reincarnation? Mine's a Beamish Red.

Reincarnation? Beamish Red

Like the Murphy's, I'm not bitter

[non capisco]

And of course there's the legendary, nightmare-inducing Kinder ad... neonscrubblie!

That is a remarkably well preserved almost HD looking version of an ad which ran for about a fortnight in 1983 before most people had video recorders. Is it now in the Criterion Collection?

That fucking freak egg and its frothing glossolalia was my internet holy grail for years. I think it finally resurfaced on YouTube around 2006 and was exactly how I remembered it from when I was five years old.

[non capisco]

The  Tizer 'I'se Got the Ize' ads (here's one that seems most familiar to me) were intriguingly odd...

Ize stizeill fizancey thize wizeoman izen thizeat.

[Phil_A]

Still no sign of the Cartoonies chocolate biscuits ad from the early nineties that has haunted me for years, one day I'll find it I swear!

I did find the creepy Mitsubishi advert from 1992 which features some very early morphing effects (this would've been around the time of T2 so this technique was still pretty novel).

https://www.tvark.org/?page=media&mediaid=55488

[Glebe]

Well of course we need to represent Viv Stanshall...wot no Mr Cadbury's Parrot? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7uPzoh4oS1I

Crikey, didn't know that was he!

<QI Klaxon>
We covered this in a thread a couple of years ago. The voice in the 80s Scotch 'Archie' adverts was Deryck 'Please, Sir!' Guyler. In the 90s they used other voices, including Richard Wilson. The 'Not Fade Away' ad you linked to is a mid-80s Guyler one.

Fuck's sake, how did that thread pass me by?! It sounds so like Wilde, I can surely be forgiven for the mistake... I still can't believe it's not him, my reality has been turned upside down!

Roll us your cap, Uncle Stan, a 1983 ad for the British Dairy Council, directed by Dick Clement, no less.

Excellent, cheers for that B!

Back to Mr CP, is that Arabella Weir? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HSkbP_xyOtI

Helen 'Mrs. Miggins/KYTV's Anna Daptor' Atkinson-Wood.

Aha, right... I didn't think she looked like Weir, but the male presenter actually is Fast Show alumni Paul Shearer, amiright?

Rimsky-Korsakov!!

Just utterly superb.

That's great!

Also, mints.  Mr Soft:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DGrffn_LKzE

Ah yes, another familiar old chestnut I forgot about!

Must you torment me once more with that dead eyed old nan? At least one other CaB poster has revealed that she terrified them too, IT IS NOT JUST ME.

Excellent thread, Glebe. Finally a CaB adverts thread I can weigh in on without fear of losing my job tangentially sucking Satan's cock.

Thanks NC, I'm sure many more advertorial memories will be dug up in coming posts! Soda Stream is the most early-'80s thing ever.

The Prudential advert which was a playground meme before anyone had ever heard of a meme:

"I want to be...a treeee"

https://youtu.be/M-skHC84AhU?t=28

And from a couple of years later, a pre-Fast Show Mark Williams and Jo Unwin (Mrs Chris Morris).

https://youtu.be/V9DIDMeOJlY

"We wanna be able to go out once in a whoil"

"I wanna be in goal!" I was really surprized when I found out that was Mrs. Morris in the second ad.

Here's the bastard

https://www.hatads.org.uk/catalogue/record/dcc79ee3-de13-4c38-b826-a99c2e0c5319

Good on you, Jo!

That is a remarkably well preserved almost HD looking version of an ad which ran for about a fortnight in 1983 before most people had video recorders. Is it now in the Criterion Collection?

I guess somebody did a bit of restoration work on it.

[jobotic]

Still no sign of the Cartoonies chocolate biscuits ad from the early nineties that has haunted me for years, one day I'll find it I swear!

Not one of these? Is Cartoonies the brand? Never heard of 'em.

https://www.hatads.org.uk/catalogue/search.aspx?Kwrd=chocolate+biscuits

[Bently Sheds]

There was a Mazda advert in the mid 90s that was all silver, with people dressed as silver devils and horned monsters, loads of silver balls rolling about, all shot through a distorted lens and fiery explosions all set in a desert - way before the Zoom Zoom shit. Well arty it was. I remember it had some absolutely cracking electronic background music to it. Can I find it anywhere? Nope.

Does anyone else remember it?

[Glebe]

There was a Mazda advert in the mid 90s that was all silver, with people dressed as silver devils and horned monsters, loads of silver balls rolling about, all shot through a distorted lens and fiery explosions all set in a desert - way before the Zoom Zoom shit. Well arty it was. I remember it had some absolutely cracking electronic background music to it. Can I find it anywhere? Nope.

Does anyone else remember it?

Are you sure you're not thinking of this?

Old man out of Metallica's 'Enter Sandman' video making an appearance there, I think.

[Camp Tramp]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r0wDjWOnHcY

This advert must have single-handedly destroyed the British pork industry. I wasn't a great fan of pork anyway and this advert didn't help me develop an appreciation for it.

[buzby]

Are you sure you're not thinking of this?

Old man out of Metallica's 'Enter Sandman' video making an appearance there, I think.

Another classic Dunlop ad (v.o. by Briers) from the days before they got asset stripped into oblivion:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0V4HK0r3kjo