Starmer's Labour: Ghouls and Tools on the Ship of Fools

[Video Game Fan 2000]

I just realised the "tools of my trade" line in his speech was the same piece of rhetoric as the excreable "broad strokes, like his painting" line from the tribute the cunt that isn't dead yet, and delivered in the same way. Most important speech of his entire career and he borrows a line from a bloody eulogy he gave not 10 months ago

Not even Johnson is that shit at public speaking. Isn't this Basil Wolverton drawing of Bernard Sumner supposed to be a fucking lawyer

[chveik]

hope he pulls through

[Video Game Fan 2000]

Pull through...like my knob.

[Video Game Fan 2000]

People who said Obama lost working class support because of his condescending style of speaking and need to be clever must be raging over Starmer. Tabloid headlines, the name of the country he's in and puns all delivered with the witty precision of Brendan OCarroll and the velvety grace of the voiceover from a tango advert

[Fambo Number Mive]

Not sure how one joke about a man who makes plenty of dubious comments shows Starmer is a "weak man" in charge of a "rabble". Wonder who these three Labour MPs who want to be Tories are, if they really exist.

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

The businessman, his suit & his tie.

[olliebean]

Why would they? If they'd be happy in the Tory party they should be happy in Keith's Labour

Perhaps they feel Labour is too right wing for them these days.

[Buelligan]

Has Keith talked much about his smother?

He can't, she was a nurse.  Keith don't want to bring them up in case he gets asked about pay.  That's why we talk about the dad, because, thanks to neoliberalism, Britain no longer has a manufacturing base, so no difficult questions there.  It's like chatting about dinosaurs.

[Paul Calf]

Et Tu, the Blue Man Group?

THAT'S what it reminds me of. Thank you!

[ZoyzaSorris]

Perhaps they feel Labour is too right wing for them these days.

Yes maybe they support nationalisation of core services and higher tax on corporations, both of which seem to be more likely under the Cons than Keith as it stands..

[Buelligan]

With Keith writing for The Sun, I think many do.

Today the families & survivors of Hillsborough, the people of my city, supporters of our great club & the millions of others smeared by the rag will feel profoundly betrayed by the leader of the party I was elected to represent.

My full statement below.

My statement in response to Keir writing in The S** #JFT97

[idunnosomename]

Frowemsic

[SpiderChrist]

If anyone is a fan of The News Quiz here, I would like to warn them about the latest episode in which Fatt Morde verbally fellates Starmer and Lucy Porter bangs on about how she wants to shag him.

[Buelligan]

Nah.  Gave up stuff like that a long time ago when I realised that BBC news services were run by spooks.

[SpiderChrist]

You don't listen to BBC Comedy because of BBC News?

[Zetetic]

How can anyone tell the difference?!?!

The News Quiz can have that.

[Pink Gregory]

Why does anyone, *anyone* hold Fatt Morde in any regard.  Does he even have material?  Is he even funny? 

John Robins (insert x other panel show comedian) has similar dogshit politics too but he's still funny. 

[Buelligan]

You don't listen to BBC Comedy because of BBC News?

I guess it's because of the title.  Anything the BBC touches, like Murdoch but with a decorative toilet roll cover, news-wise is intentionally warped.  Just makes me sick so I don't bother any more.

[Replies From View]

Lot of #FBPE types hate Starmer for abandoning the EU so will go Lib Dem, and I suspect the Tories are the pro-EU ones going back home after voting Labour for the 'People's Vote' malarky.

First Past The....


no idea





Can we have an appendix please with all the trendy hashtags summarised?

[Buelligan]

FBPE is Follow Back[nb]You know, like twitter follow-pals all holding hands and marching round the playground[/nb], Pro-Europe.  No one, not one living soul, with that appended to their moniker is worth the scrapings from your toenails, old chum.  They are Dreadful pricks.  I say that, as you know, as someone who was pretty keen on remaining.

[Paul Calf]

The FBPE twats and the Bluetick liberals made me embarrassed and reluctant to advocate for the EU in a way the Quitters never could.

[JamesTC]

With Keith writing for The Sun, I think many do.

Gammon faced CUNT. FUCK OFF

[Quote]

Writing for The Sun has to be done (apparently), it's in the 'Labour are serious' playbook - an easy-to-follow ten step guide to turn your hapless dullard into an eminently electable, profoundly serious PM-in-waiting.

[pigamus]

You're not missing much with the News Quiz - it was great when Miles Jupp did it but it's not been the same since Jeremy Hardy died.

[Buelligan]

I fully support the great people of Liverpool.

NO person worth their salt should ever write in the S*n.

No ifs No Buts!
#justiceforthe97
#JFT97

There's no need to ever write in that rag.

My solidarity with the people of Liverpool.

#J4T97

[pancreas]

You'd think with all this raging, with Labour sinking further in the polls, this might be a good time to mount a leadership challenge.

[Replies From View]

FBPE is Follow Back[nb]You know, like twitter follow-pals all holding hands and marching round the playground[/nb], Pro-Europe.  No one, not one living soul, with that appended to their moniker is worth the scrapings from your toenails, old chum.  They are Dreadful pricks.  I say that, as you know, as someone who was pretty keen on remaining.

Thank you!

[Bobloblawslawbomb]

Why does anyone, *anyone* hold Fatt Morde in any regard.  Does he even have material?  Is he even funny? 

I truly hate Matt Forde. That interview he did where he said that corbyn being elected was the most shameful moment in Labour history. He blocked me when I pointed out that only a fat, unfunny, right wing cunt like himself would think that a socialist being democratically elected by the membership (twice) is worse than the Iraq war. Gah I hate him so much. I want Labour to get 25% in the next election just to jam it into his fat fucking face.

Via Twitter -

have said before on here, I did a charity benefit with him once, he went on first. after he'd gone the MC said 'thanks to all the acts for giving up their time for free to support this charity, except Matt Forde who requested a taxi here and back. The gig was in London, where he lives. someone else paid their own fare to come from Glasgow to raise money for charity.'

[Video Game Fan 2000]

thing is boris johnson might be right that there will be wage rises soon
then there will be relief when the supply chain problems heal and christmas is bad but not nearly as bad as it might have been
steer karma has massively fucked it by not going on the offensive sooner because if wages do go up because covid throttling+end of free movement means higher demand he can't very well lash out now because johnson can just i-i-i-i-i-i and smug his way through for another 'vaccine bounce' and the opposition will look like thundering dorks for opposing it while opposing a minimum wage hike at the same time
meanwhile the wage rises will likely only be short term, not enough to off set inflation and fuel costs, and welfare slashes and deregulations will make life measurably worse in a way that an extra fifty quid a month can't compensate for

its like putting your face in a beartrap you set yourself
he's also made it immeasurably worse for a challenger because they'd face the same dilemma - do you attack the government for doing apparently positive things after a year of uninterrupted misery or outright admit that your predecessor reneged on campaign promises? they've managed to turn boris being a sitting duck into a catch-22 for labour. its so inane. any leadership challenge from the left would have to make a point of the fact that the labour party has actively hostile to its own members for the past few years which would give the floppy haired cunt enough gloating material to see him through to 2024

[Fambo Number Mive]

Talking of MF, he tweeted this:

@mattforde
·
Sep 29
Keir Starmer's speech is one of the most important in Labour history. In one speech he's hauled Labour forward a decade. Away from being a silly protest movement of fringe issues and anti-Jewish racism, and toward a sensible, serious, government-in-waiting

I guess if you are as successful and well-connected as him (Spitting Image, show on Dave and regular radio shows must pay well) you can regard things like workers' rights, climate change and welfare benefits as "fringe issues", but they aren't "fringe" for most people in the UK.

@Hugorelly
·
18h
"At last a Labour politician who's on top of the numbers!"
After all the billions and billions squandered by Johnson's corrupt regime, Tory 'comedian' Matt Forde had the nerve to come on #TheLastLeg and make this witty little quip.