Queen Elizabeth DEAD

[idunnosomename]

One wants to be the very the best
Like no one ever ever was
To catch them is one's real quest
My son is NOT a paedophile

[Cloud]

What happens in Feb, does she resurrect and ascend to heaven or something?  Do we get special commemorative chocolate eggs?

[JamesTC]

Is this the real life?
Is this just her majesty?
One's hurt her backside,
Paid through taxpayers money
Open one's eyes,
Look up to the skies and see,
One's just a dead queen, one needs no sympathy,
Because one's easy come, easy go,
Little lie, little paedo,
Any way the wind blows doesn't really matter to
One, to one

[Video Game Fan 2000]

They're rebooting the brand.

[Mr Banlon]

What happens in Feb, does she resurrect and ascend to heaven or something?  Do we get special commemorative chocolate eggs?

She shouts 'Release the tappen' and shits on the floor.

[JamesTC]

They're rebooting the brand.

It will prove deeply unpopular and they will make a fortune bringing back Queen Classic.

[Clatty McCutcheon]

What happens in Feb, does she resurrect and ascend to heaven or something?  Do we get special commemorative chocolate eggs?

That's when she's going to come out of hibernation. Nothing to worry about (in her new phase, she is now a hibernating mammal).

[Mr Banlon]

[chveik]

she'll be back... in pog form!

[rack and peanut]

What happens in Feb, does she resurrect and ascend to heaven or something?  Do we get special commemorative chocolate eggs?

She will break free-ee

[Butchers Blind]

They've photoshopped her hands on the front of the Daily M*il

[Huxleys Babkins]

Queen 2.0

[Cuellar]

They've photoshopped her hands on the front of the Daily M*il

[Huxleys Babkins]

The US version of Closer magazine has decided that she should die as soon as possible.

[imitationleather]

Reminds me of when the Jade Goody tribute mags hit the stands before she'd actually died.

I wonder if she had time to look through them herself.

[H-O-W-L]

To be fair (I believe it was Brooker that said it) those Jade tribute mags were done by Jade (at least, presumed within a reasonable degree of doubt) on a license/agreement sort of thing to ensure her funeral costs were covered (also why all the celeb grot mags were at her funeral) and to ensure a substantial leftover sum for her children in future.

[JamesTC]

Feel like shit, just want to improve my bone density.

[Johnny Foreigner]

Oh, I've finally got it. 'Die Queen', as though it were the English verb. That took a while...

Der Spiegel is excellent; I used to read it every week. Well-researched, lengthy articles on politics, science, history. Well-informed, slightly left of centre but objective, written in immaculate German. They also regularly enclose an accompanying DVD with a documentary. In terms of quality, neither The New Statesman nor The Economist comes near it.

[Pink Gregory]

Feel like shit, just want to improve my bone density.

Yeah man, just want to be really fuckin heavy.  Like *weighty*.  Big solid ass bones. 

[idunnosomename]

Nice.

[TrenterPercenter]

AIBU to think that because we have been paying the Queens wages all this time that when she dies everyone should get a tiny morsel of her body to eat? just so we can ingest her greatness and become slightly more royal ourselves.

[Video Game Fan 2000]

I think we should get a six foot tall jam jar, put her inside and then...

[Rich Uncle Skeleton]

bagsy the palace!

[Mr Banlon]

[Dex Sawash]

Make this your avatar

[peanutbutter]

Is the February date just so they can wheel her out looking terrible on Christmas Day and everyone will just be surprised she looks not quite dead? It'd be a solid way of reducing scrutiny on her looking like shit from here on out.

[Video Game Fan 2000]

I hope she frenches the Pope on Christmas Day.

[Blue Jam]

Princess Eugenics and Zara Tindall are doing a joint christening for their nippers tomorrow and apparently the CoD is determined to attend:

https://www.standard.co.uk/news/uk/queen-expected-attend-double-royal-christening-princess-eugenie-zara-tindall-b967332.html

Expecting another cancellation due to a "sprain" here.

[jobotic]

So when she finally does cark it I wonder if it will be the beginning of the end for the monarchy.

Otherwise sensible people seem to like and respect the greedy old cow, but no one feels that way about Charles, do they? And he's not even the worst in the crew. Will people feel so not bothered about chucking so much money their way?

[Jack Shaftoe]

Also, after the Queen, it's going to be (barring unforeseen events) a hundred years of balding middle-aged men by the time they get the crown: Charles, then William, then Bertie (? genuinely not sure if that's his name). It's not photogenic or interesting, which does matter.