Death Stranding, new Hideo Kojima joint

[Thursday]

I'll be honest, I genuinely want this game to be absolute dogshit... I'll be happy if it's good too, but it would be so great if it was shit.

[Ferris]

Yeah I think Conan is genuinely very funny and likeable - I mean he wrote some fucking brilliant Simpsons episodes, how could you doubt his comedy credentials? But that bit with Kojima was a bit of a damp squib, it felt like they didn't really get any good material out of it but had to stick it in the episode anyway.

Yes, on all counts.

I quite liked the segment, it's just a likeable man dicking about for 6 minutes, fair enough.

[Urinal Cake]

I'll be honest, I genuinely want this game to be absolute dogshit... I'll be happy if it's good too, but it would be so great if it was shit.

I want it to get 6 out of 10 reviews so Kojima starts thinking properly about the sequel.

[Mister Six]

Conan is funny as fuck you bunch of cynical cretins.

He's pretty good but that video was not his best outing.

Watched that doc of his tour a few months ago, was really grim to see just how bitter he was about all the Tonight Show stuff. That could've been the chance for him to realise he could be doing much more fulfilling stuff with his time but he was just fucking itching to get back to hosting.

He likes his job. That's not a bad thing, is it?

[Obel]

He's pretty good but that video was not his best outing.

Sure, but calling somebody abysmal for one misfire is moronic.

[Urinal Cake]

I'd say Conan is probably on the same level as James Corden as a late show host. Granted Conan isn't given much in terms of guests, budget etc but fucking hell Craig Ferguson made it work.

[Famous Mortimer]

Watched that doc of his tour a few months ago, was really grim to see just how bitter he was about all the Tonight Show stuff. That could've been the chance for him to realise he could be doing much more fulfilling stuff with his time but he was just fucking itching to get back to hosting.

It was embarrassing, I thought, and put me off him (that, and Andy is getting more boring and reactionary as he gets older). Imagine being as talented a writer as Conan and deciding what you'd rather do, to the extent you'll go on tour with rewritten pop songs that refer to how upset you were to not have a job that you think you deserved, is be a late-night talk show host. No matter how low down the ladder you have to go to carry on doing it.

[Small Man Big Horse]

I'd say Conan is probably on the same level as James Corden as a late show host. Granted Conan isn't given much in terms of guests, budget etc but fucking hell Craig Ferguson made it work.

That's madness, Conan has his dodgy moments from time to time but he's so superior to Corden that there aren't words.

[The Boston Crab]

https://opencritic.com/game/7816/death-stranding/reviews

Rather positive OpenCritic score but the reviews make it sound very boring. You know everyone's been asking for years, "what's the actual game, though?". Well, the walking around carrying boxes is the game.

Kojima has obviously made some brilliant games and MGSV is one of the greatest mechanical marvels ever (and I even liked the story, unfinished and underdeveloped as it was) but this sounds like an open world walking simulator padding out a bloated Kojima movie. I'm still aware that this could be a brilliant, unique combination depending on how effective the story and characters are but I am wary.


I'd also say, without attaching too much weight to the biggest sites, that the OpenCritic score is massively boosted by a tonne of smaller no-name reviewers giving this full marks and using dizzying fanboyish hyperbole. The average score for the first page of reviews would be a lot less, for what it's worth.

[Urinal Cake]

It looks like it's for the lovers, the dreamers and menus. I think I will like this game a lot. Needs D-Dog.

[Operty1]

It seems you have to balance the main character while walking using the triggers I think, with the terrain and inventory carried adding variables. Considering the amount of walking you have to do, this just seems like a massive pointless ball ache.

[Hank Venture]

Sure, but calling somebody abysmal for one misfire is moronic.

To be clear, it wasn't for one misfire - it was for literally every clip I've ever seen of him. Cheers. A grown man with statement hair that slaps his table and cackles like an ADD child. Pete Holmes-esque.

[madhair60]

This looks one one of the wankest, dog shittinest games ever coiled out.

[Timothy]

This looks absolutely amazing. Can't wait for next week.

[brat-sampson]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YuLRlRLBwQ8 SkillUp loved it. I'm amazed that this turned out to be even more divisive than I expected. It truly asks players to be on-board with a game about gradual traversal and asynchronous multiplayer assistance/world-building (in a literal, non-narrative sense) surrounded by all the off-kilter 'Kojima weirdness (tm)' that we've come to expect. Looks like it's basically very easy for some to declare it shite, and point out the flaws and the problems and the perfectly valid reasons they hated it, but without denying any of those, other people will have an utterly absorbing and brilliant time.

I'm still fully in.

[Thursday]

I'm still intrigued because I'm willing to give games a go even if they aren't "traditionally fun" but even some of the positive reviews have that vibe of "well it's a unique experience! It'll be divisive" that reads like a fanboy trying to come to terms with the fact that their hero made something shit.

That could be unfair, but I suspected this might happen.

[The Boston Crab]

I totally agree with you, sounds like so much apologism to me. Still keen to play something unique and I'm not arsed if it's not my thing, but I am finding the reviews unconvincing.

[brat-sampson]

I mean, this is a game where the standard action of the shoulder triggers is to grip your 'backpack' straps. The left trigger grips the left strap and the right trigger grips the right strap. This affects gameplay by adjusting the movement behaviour of your character. Also you permanently carry around a baby that exists primarily to alert you to the presence of predatory extradimentional entities, but that when knocked around too much and stressed out, can start to cry. Through your DS4. To sooth it you are to rock it back and forth. Via the DS4's motion controls. The terrain is hostile, not typically because there are enemies present, but because it's rocky, and you could easily trip or find yourself at a cliff edge with too short of a rope. A game where your loadout decisions are based on where you plan to go, not what you plan to do, yet are still vitally important.

Tim Rogers called it the Gran Turismo of walking simulators, which I liked. In his 60m review which reviews it in terms of a) a game, b) a pet, c) a film, d) a book and e) 'as a piece of work by the artist Hideo Kojima'.

[Mister Six]

Sounds like the video game equivalent of an Andy Kaufman stunt - admirable and fun to read about after the fact, but not necessarily something you would want to inflict upon yourself.

[brat-sampson]

I've seen comparisons to Tarkovsky or Lars von Trier, as well as to Skyrim if you were encumbered the whole time. It's making me think of David Foster Wallace as well in that there's a tedium and a drudgery and a steadfast refusal to be processed by a newcomer on anything resembling familiar terms that slowly becomes something addictive in and of itself, the boredom and incomprehensibility being almost the point. A lot of reviewers I really respect are speaking very highly of it, while also heavily cautioning that yes, there's a lot of reasons readers/views won't enjoy this. Like, at all, almost.

Almost.

For long periods of time. But that if you think there's a chance it could resonate with you and you can deal with the lack of respect it gives or owes you, there's something truly special about it when all's said and done, and that afterwards going from this to a shooter or an RPG where you save the world with your buds and level up your stats etc will be almost a necessity as well as a dramatic return for comfort after being out there alone for so long doing something that will stay with you for a long, long time.

Note: I probably should be giving views on something I haven't touched after watching a few reviews and drinking a couple of beers, but thems my 2c right now.

(Danny O'Dwyer will be my 3rd and probably final link to a video review, this one's under 10m, so might be preferable to many)

[Operty1]

Nobody seems to be referring to this balance walking parcel delivery game as fun or entertaining.

Each to their own, but personally, after such a long time in development and the odd teasers, this does appear to be hugely underwhelming.

Also (and I recognise this as my problem) I just don't think I have the patience to walk some boxes a few hours from point A to B encountering nothing, regardless of the pretty scenery.

[The Boston Crab]

Brat, no offence because I really like you but that sounds like a fair degree of apologism. It's one thing to say that Dark Souls is uncompromising but it's fundamentally a very rewarding combat gameplay with an incredibly well realised world. It's quite another to say that a game has inherent value because it is uncompromising. As I said said elsewhere, a game can be challenging, experimental, unique and still a bit shit.

[Urinal Cake]

The walking/traversing aspect only gets fun after upgrades, gadgets and vehicles apparently. But what people say is that the walking-puzzle mechanics seem to well implemented though the animation, button config get in the way of that. What people really seem to love is the multiplayer aspect and the themes and messages.
The second half is the best bit but it's only 'rewarding' because you made it through the first bit like eating a pizza, crust first.

What I get the feeling is that this is probably the most important indie game of this generation. But instead it's an AAA title. This should've been a tight 20+ hour video game with the mechanics and themes intact without the AAA graphics, multiplayer implementation and Kojima Storytelling^TM.

[brat-sampson]

Brat, no offence because I really like you but that sounds like a fair degree of apologism. It's one thing to say that Dark Souls is uncompromising but it's fundamentally a very rewarding combat gameplay with an incredibly well realised world. It's quite another to say that a game has inherent value because it is uncompromising. As I said said elsewhere, a game can be challenging, experimental, unique and still a bit shit.

No, that's fair. Dark souls is uncompromising in terms of it's demands of precision and attention on the player, both in terms of moment to moment attention to combat/situational awareness as well as incidental attention to detail regarding the lore and motivation of the player character. It's absolutely the work of a master of the form. But I'd also call Kojima a master, personally, and this is the most freedom he's ever had.

I'd fully agree that this could definitely be a naked emperor situation and it really is just a shitty boring game with dodgy controls in desperate need of somebody to tell hideo that one or more of his ideas aren't actually that good.

But then I'm someone who liked MGS4, despite the ludicrous pandering, narrative contortions to remove loose ends and numerous indulgences and excessive pointless details.

I guess I want to say I'll happily eat my words and regret my cautious optimism if I bounce off the thing after 4-6 hours, but that I'm hoping there's a chance I fucking love it, and I've got priors on similar situations going either way.

[Hank Venture]

This sounds like piss. I hate inventory management and cheat to turn it off in Fallout, Skyrim, etc. Will not be buying this.

[Osmium]

The launch trailer for this was complete wank. I'm not still chugging along.

[popcorn]

This is going to be good.

See you a few pages later to confirm I was right, nerds.

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

Ha, loving the dumbfounded 'So it's just walking and delivering parcels omg so borrrrring' reactions.

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

Even if this game is embolism it will still have been worth it for the reactions it's getting.

[PlanktonSideburns]

Ha, loving the dumbfounded 'So it's just walking and delivering parcels omg so borrrrring' reactions.

Shooting people in the face is just delivering bullets