Desolation IV: The Abyssal Plains

[Gregory Torso]

The city of Birmingham changes its name to the city of BARMBARMBARM

[dex]

Pressure cooked semen. In jars and dated, faced perfectly on a racking system in a Margate garage.

[Fishfinger]

Pay for Dignitas but they just dump you in a cupboard when the cameras are off.

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

Kathy sells smack to little tiny kids. Kids for fucks sake. Kids. Innocent tiny little kids.

They absolutely lap it up.

[Ferris]

Rick Waller's comeback album.

[Twit 2]

A fat, racist tarantula leaps out of a cupboard and shits all over the spatulas.

[pancreas]

^.

[Spoon of Ploff]

Simon the 'thread killer' eats a raw cabbage while considering  his next move.

[dex]

A can of Stag Chilli is rammed up your sister's cunt.

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

A can of Stag Chilli is rammed up your sister's cunt.

Your sister is in cold storage so this will extend the shelf life by another 15 years.

[Chollis]

Dawn French farts in the face of a guide dog

[Chollis]

A spiteful couple name their first child Detritus

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

An energy drink salesman from Gdansk sets up the tribute act Pole Oakenfold

[dex]

Dawn French farts in the face of a guide dog

Beautiful deso.

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

The city of Birmingham changes its name to the city of BARMBARMBARM

We laughed

[Twit 2]

Schwarz Post-Brexit Bin Juice Marinade, Aldi £17.99

[Pingers]

Adele's next album is not about the first joyous months of a new romance, or the bitter endgame of one about to crash and burn, but about the bit in the middle that's just ok. Track 7 is called "Do We Need Owt From Morrisons?"

[BlodwynPig]

Adele's next album is not about the first joyous months of a new romance, or the bitter endgame of one about to crash and burn, but about the bit in the middle that's just ok. Track 7 is called "Do We Need Owt From Morrisons?"

37

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

A spindle of yak cack helixes across a malattended layby.

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

Brenda the Shelf-Gelf descends from her shelf to scavenge half eaten pie crusts and the caramel remnants off chocolate wrappers.

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

The Milkybar kid goes bald

[Twit 2]

A snaggle-toothed farmer fists a ewe with one arm while smashing his other across all the buttons of a slowly sinking fruit machine. His inbred family look on with admiration at his multi-tasking abilities and then drown to death in discount slurry the following day.

[Ferris]

Derek/Little Britain crossover Christmas special.

Your father roars with laughter throughout.

[pancreas]

The neighbours' Christmas tree is monstrously large this year. Perched on top is their Polish cleaner, dressed in a gold spray-painted smock and singing Hark the Herald. The Christmas lights are burning her perineum.

[dex]

The entirety of Christian's Christmas shopping was bought from a vending machine in the gents at Weatherspoons.

[dex]

Derek/Little Britain crossover Christmas special.

Your father roars with laughter throughout.

Has to fill in the Mrs Brown's Boys hole somehow...

[petril]

Mick wakes up and the family are already out. Vicks Vapo Rub and Tennent's for breakfast it is.

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

A stentorian gym instructor runs his forefinger up and down the seam of a girl's leotard and drools.

Luckily she isn't wearing it at the time. Unluckily that's because he ripped it from her torso with his metal hands.

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

A paedophilic sexual offender of the body and soul does an immaculate Cruyff turn then vanishes with all of ver evidence.

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

A quivering pail renderer of four foot in stature minces up to Kirsty Alley and asks her to 'sign this glans'.