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July 12, 2024, 07:06:43 PM

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Jokes you don't understand pt. 734

Started by Utter Shit, January 20, 2023, 08:41:21 AM

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Cuellar

Quote from: Mr Banlon on June 10, 2024, 04:16:03 PMA brown tie would make the teeth look less yellow in contrast. That's how I read that.

Would it? Would it really?

Very weak joke.

Oosp

Quote from: madhair60 on June 10, 2024, 12:02:05 PMdoes anyone have evidence of Spike Milligan having ever said or done anything funny?


Grave, in fairness

did Rodney Dangerfield have any funny jokes?


sevendaughters

Quote from: Cleveland Steamer on June 10, 2024, 04:43:30 PMdid Rodney Dangerfield have any funny jokes?

I'm taking viagra and drinking prune juice. I don't know whether I'm coming or going.

not brilliant but would easily rate in a Dave Edinburgh poll.

Small Man Big Horse

Quote from: madhair60 on June 10, 2024, 12:02:05 PMdoes anyone have evidence of Spike Milligan having ever said or done anything funny?

What the actual fuck, Madhair? I mean, christ, have you not seen Digby, The Biggest Dog In The World?

(Other than that I have no idea, but if you dare say Digby's not a frickin' awesome film it's over between us. Over for good).

lazyhour

He has a great physical gag of hurling himself on the floor in a tangle of limbs, saying "this puts me in a very difficult position."

Thosworth

 
There's a joke in KMKY which I never understood. I never thought it worth (or acceptable to) necro the "Times you thought Alan was right" thread, but it works here:

Alan is interviewing advice columnist Daniella Forrest when they discuss a hypothetical dog, which isn't Alan's dog Montgomery:

DF: Well perhaps you could get Rommel involved in your sex life
AP: No no he's too old. He's blind in one eye, can't contain his bladder.

Now the audience laugh, because 'haha silly Alan (+ wee wee)', and by this point the audience have been conditioned into dialogue/response/laugh, dialogue/response/laugh. But while it has the shape of a joke, I can't fathom what the initial suggestion was.

The response after this to Alan is "No, you're taking me too literally". But what does 'involving the dog' mean if it isn't supposed to be literal?

(EDIT: Actually that's probably hypothetical, not sure I want an answer on this one)

Gurke and Hare

It's funny that if the dog weren't old, blind and incontinent Alan might be open to involving him in his sex life isn't it?

JesusAndYourBush

Walking a dog in the park is a good way of meeting other people who are also walking their dogs in the park.

markburgle

Quote from: Thosworth on June 12, 2024, 10:33:10 AMThere's a joke in KMKY which I never understood. I never thought it worth (or acceptable to) necro the "Times you thought Alan was right" thread, but it works here:

Alan is interviewing advice columnist Daniella Forrest when they discuss a hypothetical dog, which isn't Alan's dog Montgomery:

DF: Well perhaps you could get Rommel involved in your sex life
AP: No no he's too old. He's blind in one eye, can't contain his bladder.

Now the audience laugh, because 'haha silly Alan (+ wee wee)', and by this point the audience have been conditioned into dialogue/response/laugh, dialogue/response/laugh. But while it has the shape of a joke, I can't fathom what the initial suggestion was.

The response after this to Alan is "No, you're taking me too literally". But what does 'involving the dog' mean if it isn't supposed to be literal?

(EDIT: Actually that's probably hypothetical, not sure I want an answer on this one)

I've not heard the episode but it sounds like other Partridge stuff where he claims to be talking about a hypothetical, but it's just a thinly veiled reference to a real problem he doesn't want to admit to. The "too old" line sounds like the bit where he tells on himself and starts talking about [real] Montgomerey instead of [hypothetical] Rommel.

As for "too literally", maybe she was using it as a jokey example of how he needed to be more adventurous?

Tony Tony Tony


gmoney

#162
From Spy Hard:

Person: I bid you adieu

Leslie Neilson: Thank you, but I'm quite happy with the do I have now.

Is the joke her he think he's been offered a haircut? If so, how the hell did that get all the way to being filmed and not edited out? If not, what am I missing?


beanheadmcginty

In Amiga Power magazine, whenever the word "dilemma" was mentioned in an article, the character of the editor would intervene - Private Eye style - and say "great cars them dilemmas". Anyone know what this is a reference to or its meaning?

JesusAndYourBush

Quote from: gmoney on June 14, 2024, 11:42:34 PMhow the hell did that get all the way to being filmed and not edited out?

I had the same thought the other day. I was watching the Kenny Everett Show on That's 2 and one of the jokes was something along the lines of 'I went on a picnic in the forest the other day. I took my pickaxe and hit a tree.'  I know some of his jokes might be seen as naff by people watching today, but that was dogshit even by his standards.

JesusAndYourBush

Quote from: beanheadmcginty on June 15, 2024, 12:05:44 AMIn Amiga Power magazine, whenever the word "dilemma" was mentioned in an article, the character of the editor would intervene - Private Eye style - and say "great cars them dilemmas". Anyone know what this is a reference to or its meaning?

It's a Ted Chippington joke. I've even heard him say it the one time I saw him. (It's just because cars in the 70s/80s all had names like cortina and granada and dilemma fits right in with that style of naming.)

Underturd

And it sounds a bit like Daihatsu.

neveragain

Quote from: JesusAndYourBush on June 15, 2024, 12:10:43 AMI was watching the Kenny Everett Show on That's 2 and one of the jokes was something along the lines of 'I went on a picnic in the forest the other day. I took my pickaxe and hit a tree.'

I don't get this one at all, can you help?

lazyhour

Quote from: neveragain on June 15, 2024, 05:04:21 PMI don't get this one at all, can you help?

Same. I've read it and reread it and don't have a clue.

JesusAndYourBush

It's just a feeble word gag with the pic in picnic and pickaxe.

Beelog

I was about to post the "not so much the nineties but the Jadanketies" joke until I googled it for the spelling and found multiple threads from this forum explaining the joke.

lazyhour

Quote from: JesusAndYourBush on June 15, 2024, 05:46:26 PMIt's just a feeble word gag with the pic in picnic and pickaxe.

Wow, do we really think that's the joke? It doesn't even register! Did the audience laugh?

Fambo Number Mive

In The Thick of It, when Steve Fleming tells Malcolm "I'm going to take you down to FUNKY TOWN! Funky Town Central here we come" is the joke that he is rubbish at making threats? Or is it some kind of amusing threat? The line amuses me as it sounds silly but I don't understand why he would say that.

Dr Rock

Quote from: JesusAndYourBush on June 15, 2024, 12:10:43 AMI was watching the Kenny Everett Show on That's 2 and one of the jokes was something along the lines of 'I went on a picnic in the forest the other day. I took my pickaxe and hit a tree.'

Need to hear the exact joke, and who was saying it - Sid Snot? As important stuff might be missing to understand the man's clever witticism.

SpiderChrist

QuoteI took my pickaxe and hit a tree

Does it make a bit more sense if you say "I took my pickaxe and nicked a tree"?

Polly to Mr Hutchinson in The Hotel Inspectors, "you're not, by any chance, the Duke of Kent, are you?"

Is there anything more to this than implying that Mr Hutchinson is a bit up himself?

Spudgun

Quote from: SpiderChrist on June 15, 2024, 07:41:45 PMDoes it make a bit more sense if you say "I took my pickaxe and nicked a tree"?
I think that's the thrust of it; picnic = pick nick = nick with a pickaxe. Then forest/tree. As Dr Rock said above, a character like Sid Snot could sell a pun that feeble, but it still depends on the exact wording.

JesusAndYourBush

Quote from: SpiderChrist on June 15, 2024, 07:41:45 PMDoes it make a bit more sense if you say "I took my pickaxe and nicked a tree"?

Yeah that's it.  It's still a shit joke.

Thames s2e08
Sid Snot - "My bird Deidre and me like picnicing in the woods. I take a pick and nick trees."
https://www.mediafire.com/file/9218rkowmq844kj/Sid_Snot_Picnic_%2528s2e08%252C_1979%2529.mp4/file

Stinky Lomax

Quote from: David Pielingtonburygrot on June 15, 2024, 07:45:16 PMPolly to Mr Hutchinson in The Hotel Inspectors, "you're not, by any chance, the Duke of Kent, are you?"

Is there anything more to this than implying that Mr Hutchinson is a bit up himself?

No, that's it. He's just acting massively entitled, and Polly is a lot smarter than Fawlty at getting a little dig in at him and making herself feel better.

Quote from: Fambo Number Mive on June 15, 2024, 06:56:12 PMI'm going to take you down to FUNKY TOWN!

This is possibly a reference to the DeNiro quote from Meet the Parents . His character uses the following line when intimidating another character:

QuoteI will take you down to Chinatown

Which itself is a rhythm-and-rhyme elaboration of the phrase "to go to town on", meaning to enthusiastically and unrestrainedly attack (or sexually engage with).

It may be that adding Chinatown suggests martial arts, or is intended to allude to the kind of sustained violence featured in Big Trouble in Little China (1986).

Separately, Lipps Inc's 1979 song Funkytown includes the line

QuoteWon't you take me to
Funkytown?

The accidental combination of the previous cultural memes creates the initial threat, and the follow up ("central") is the continuation of a feeble effort at threatening behaviour.

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