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Identify a Sketch / Line / Funnyism

Started by Matthew Dawkins Jub Jub, July 13, 2022, 04:06:53 PM

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Matthew Dawkins Jub Jub

I don't believe there's already a thread for this, so I thought it might be an idea to set one up. I have terrible memory problems and sometimes I remember a fragment of a sketch or a full joke without remembering the comedians involved. Maybe we can use this thread to place such puzzles.

In my case, I vaguely recall a sketch where Paul McCartney was in voiceover being accused of doing something terrible to children or animals, so it was very Brass Eye like, and it cut to Lenny Henry saying "he must be stopped." I can't remember the full context of the joke, however. Can anyone help?

Brundle-Fly

This has the whiff of a Comic Relief sketch.

neveragain

Is it from Cassetteboy's take on The One Show? I believe it is.

Matthew Dawkins Jub Jub

Quote from: neveragain on July 13, 2022, 08:07:58 PMIs it from Cassetteboy's take on The One Show? I believe it is.

You know what, you're bloody right. Can of coke to you.

pandadeath

What is the phrase "white sandy bitches" (a play on "white sandy beaches") from?

JesusAndYourBush

This is one I've had on my mind for years. A kid at school used to be always repeating comedy sketches he'd seen on TV the previous night.  Often It was something I'd seen but sometimes not.  Sometimes I didn't piece together wtf he'd been blethering about until years later.  For example in 1984/85 he was quoting Hale & Pace's 'The Management' and trying to get a friend (who'd not seen it) to play the other character so they could do the sketch, but his friend was distracted by something else so it fell on its arse.  H&P must have made a guest appearance someplace because it was several years later until they had a show and I saw them do the sketch and the penny dropped.

So the one I can't identify was of a black guy going into a shop and says "seat!" and an armchair slides across the floor until it's perfectly positioned and he sits down.  Then he says (in a cod West Indian accent) "I want a maaaaars baaarrrr", and after a pause "I want a maaaaars baaarrrr, I've got diabeeeeteeeees".

This would be around 1984/85.  The black guy has to be Lenny Henry I'm guessing.  Offensive probably and probably also pisspoor, but I've got that bloody "I want a mars bar" stuck in my head, and it gets conjured up again whenever anyone mentions mars bars, so I'd like to find some more solid information about that damn sketch!

Famous Mortimer


JesusAndYourBush

Ah! That's solved another one!  I remember that sketch but in my mind it was the Two Ronnies (Barker as shopkeeper, Corbett as customer).  I always thought that was quite a daring punchline for the Rons but it turns out I'd misremembered it!

Matthew Dawkins Jub Jub

Quote from: JesusAndYourBush on July 16, 2022, 01:31:15 AMAh! That's solved another one!  I remember that sketch but in my mind it was the Two Ronnies (Barker as shopkeeper, Corbett as customer).  I always thought that was quite a daring punchline for the Rons but it turns out I'd misremembered it!

Did the Two Ronnies (either of them) ever wear blackface?

SpiderChrist



Robot DeNiro

Quote from: neveragain on July 13, 2022, 08:07:58 PMIs it from Cassetteboy's take on The One Show? I believe it is.
Oh dear, I just read the OP's question and thought 'Nope, that doesn't sound at all familiar'.

Dex Sawash


Lady next door, when presented with a question often replied

"We could shove a snake up his arse"

Which I always hoped was from something, google results disturbing.

Magnum Valentino

Might have been my first ever post on CaB under my original account, but I'd love someone to be able to remember what the line "shit, we spent the last of our euro on that" is from.

It'll be from about 2010 onwards so not the Mighty Boosh which also used Euro as its currency. I can no longer remember even the context of the line, perhaps it was to do with a failed contraption or plan. The choice of currency remains hilarious to me even now. I'm thinking it was something new, perhaps UK sketch or sitcom show, maybe from about 2014 or 2015 but don't let those details dereail you.

Ray Travez

stand up routine, paraphrased from memory. I'd love to know who its was. May have been Canadian, maybe American.

"I'll tell you the history of the world. You have a country, lots of resources, everyone is getting on fine. Then one day a ship arrives. Probably from Europe. The people say, "come and join us, share our resources". The guy from Europe says, "I think I'll take... all of them" The people from the country say, "We don't think that's very fair." The guy from Europe says, "I think you can fucking die" *mimes firing a pistol*

Des Wigwam

Before my time quiz show answer - I can imagine it in the voice of either Rich Hall or Reginald D Hunter. The former more than the latter.

wrec

English sitcom, probably mid to late 80s, that had a running gag about a piece of music being mistaken for the Albanian national anthem. Literally the only thing I remember about it but pretty sure it didn't involve Alexei Sayle. Has haunted me for decades.

McDead

Quote from: wrec on July 19, 2022, 06:20:21 PMEnglish sitcom, probably mid to late 80s, that had a running gag about a piece of music being mistaken for the Albanian national anthem. Literally the only thing I remember about it but pretty sure it didn't involve Alexei Sayle. Has haunted me for decades.

This has the flavour of channel 4 oddcom Nightingales to me.

Ferris

Quote from: Ray Travez on July 18, 2022, 02:20:13 PMstand up routine, paraphrased from memory. I'd love to know who its was. May have been Canadian, maybe American.

"I'll tell you the history of the world. You have a country, lots of resources, everyone is getting on fine. Then one day a ship arrives. Probably from Europe. The people say, "come and join us, share our resources". The guy from Europe says, "I think I'll take... all of them" The people from the country say, "We don't think that's very fair." The guy from Europe says, "I think you can fucking die" *mimes firing a pistol*

This is an Eddie Izzard routine I think.

neveragain

Quote from: McDead on July 20, 2022, 01:11:50 AMThis has the flavour of channel 4 oddcom Nightingales to me.

I've recently rewatched that whole series and it doesn't ring a bell.

wrec

Quote from: neveragain on July 20, 2022, 02:28:00 AMI've recently rewatched that whole series and it doesn't ring a bell.

Yeah, more of an understated bumbling middle class bloke vibe.

Harry Badger

Quote from: wrec on July 19, 2022, 06:20:21 PMEnglish sitcom, probably mid to late 80s, that had a running gag about a piece of music being mistaken for the Albanian national anthem. Literally the only thing I remember about it but pretty sure it didn't involve Alexei Sayle. Has haunted me for decades.

That's not from Blackadder is it?

wrec

Quote from: Harry Badger on July 20, 2022, 02:35:37 AMThat's not from Blackadder is it?

Contemporary setting, I'm pretty sure. I suspect it's something minor that was immediately forgotten.

English sitcom (possibly set in London? Think the characters were cockneys), either 80s or 90s. Two men stood at a bar eyeing up a lady. Bartender opens the bar hatch.

Greg Torso

Quote from: Ferris on July 20, 2022, 01:20:08 AMThis is an Eddie Izzard routine I think.

Yes, it sounds like the "do you have a flag?" routine, but it's been a while since I saw it.

Mobius

I was just about to ask which show had a sketch where Brian Blessed shouts at a naked Rhys Thomas and Tony Way before realising I could just use IMDB so instead I'll ask is Fun at the Funeral Parlour any good?Because I'd never heard of it but it seems to have funny people in it

neveragain


George White

Quote from: Matthew Dawkins Jub Jub on July 16, 2022, 02:13:11 PMOh no.
They also did a steel band parody.

Also, as mentione elsewhere, Big Momma, Steamy Winder and Kid Coalhole.

Ray Travez

The one I mentioned isn't anyone famous, but I can imagine Rich Hall, Reginald D Hunter or Izzard doing versions of it. He also said something like, "if you own a bike, you're doing well, in global terms. If you own a picture of a bike, you're doing well..."

Catalogue Trousers

Quote from: Matthew Dawkins Jub Jub on July 16, 2022, 01:26:38 PMDid the Two Ronnies (either of them) ever wear blackface?

Yes, and they also did what's effectively a sweet shop sketch, the one which I usually refer to as the Nothing Is Too Much Trouble, Sir sketch, which (IIRC) came from the same edition as the Star Wars musical parody that now has its own thread on here.

Ah! Here we are...