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David Jason spouts a load of fecking bollocks and says he was offered Father Ted

Started by George White, July 23, 2022, 11:40:20 PM

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Am I dreaming or did he appear on Good Morning or similar and talked about nearly getting Jack Jones and then chuckling and being a twat about Dad's Army and saying something like "the lad did an alright job" about Clive Dunn and damned it all with faint phrase? Britain's number two sitcom star being a showbiz bitch about the cast of Britain's number one.

He was wonderful on the original Dangermouse. Duckula was funny enough as a kid but Dangermouse repeats were mana from heaven.


In "The Only Fools and Horses Story" David Jason was offered the role of Jim Broadbent, who was offered the role of Del Boy but turned it down, but turned it down.

Anthony Hopkins was originally offered David Jason but unfortunately Wales is one of the few Western countries where human trafficking is frowned upon.


Quote from: Ignatius_S on July 25, 2022, 01:39:01 PMWhen Disney did Tailspin, they hired Phil Harris as Baloo again but after he recorded a couple of episodes, they recast. One of the writers explains that some of his comic timing had gone; reading in between the lines, there was also concerns about his age (a sprightly 85 years old). I've also read that Harris felt frustrated that his performance wasn't as it should be and wanted to bow out.

My gut feeling is that something similar at play would be here with Jason. His original narration for Danger Mouse was at a very brisk pace; I've only dipped into the reboot but my memory is someone who can do the original still, could do the new version.

Something vaguely similar happened with Oliver Postgate who was to play the book in the film version of The Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy.(2005) Apparently, after a morning in the recording booth he decided to throw the towel in saying he was a narrator not a comedy actor and that they should get Stephen Fry.


Quote from: Elderly Sumo Prophecy on July 25, 2022, 12:36:00 PMI love that story about him burping on purpose right in a make-up girl's face. He just seems like the exact sort of old cunt to do something like that.

He was also originally cast as the make up girl, but had to pass on the role as he is - direct quote - a cack handed twat.

Elderly Sumo Prophecy

According to his Wikipedia article he's a fully qualified helicopter pilot.

The script originally called for Del Boy to shit on the bar, then masturbate himself to climax and ejaculate all over his shit. He was then supposed to roll the turd around in the cum and force feed it to Trigger saying "how's that for an artic roll, my son". But David Jason told John Sullivan the scene would have more natural rhythm if Del simply fell through the bar instead. Sullivan reckons this is Jason's real success, his bravery in challenging comedy writers with down to earth suggestions when he feels something just isn't going to work as well in the medium of television as it does on the page. Not many actors would have made that suggestion and look at how much it improved the scene.


If Jason had played Ted it would have been slightly retooled as a confusing fish out of water comedy about a cheeky cockney priest on an Irish island, and quietly axed after one season. Linehan and Mathews would have never gotten their big break, and with their confidence shattered, would have made do with whatever writing gigs they could get. Dermot Morgan lives, but on the other hand, Hippies doesn't get made. Years later, Linehan signs up for a Twitter account. He gets into arguments with strangers about Seinfeld but nobody pays him much attention, and occasionally someone will say something unkind about that  thing he wrote with Delboy as a priest. By late July 2022 he has gained 673 followers.

But of course that's not how it all turned out! Ted was played by the actor the role was always intended for and became an enduring cult success. Linehan and Mathews embarked on successful careers, yada yada, by late July 2022 Linehan has 673 Twitter followers.


I'm finding the personal insults and abuse directed towards David Jason in this thread unfair and uncalled for, particularly those calling out his age and/or mental faculties - after all, he is Bwana Dik.

Gurke and Hare

Honestly, you can't even say you were offered the role of Father Ted these days without a bunch of woke snowflakes pointing out that you're talking shit.

Bad Ambassador

Believe it or not, David Jason is not a cockney. He's actually from Togo.

Claude the Racecar Driving Rockstar Super Sleuth

Rachel Whiteread was originally known as the "Cynthia Plastercaster of Peckham" but all the original Del Boys were lost in the Saatchi fire.


Remember the fight scence with the teddy boys in Quadrophenia? There were parts advertised for three extras on the beach: Nearby Ted, Ted Approaching and Farther Ted. The future Sir David considered none of these a fitting tribute to his capabilities.

Replies From View

The scary face at the end of the Star Trek credits was originally this. Thankfully Gene Roddenbury took five minutes out of his busy schedule of chasing nubile ensigns around his office desk to Yaketty Sax to tell everyone it was a bad idea.

We're all thankful for this because otherwise David Jason would have never got the part of Father Scotty and we'd never have heard his famous catchphrase "Stone the bleedin crows Captain, sod this for a game of soldiers I'm off down the frog for a kitchen sink"

Replies From View

David Jason keeps his age private for personal reasons and I do wish every Tom Dick and Harry wouldn't keep calling it out into the open.

A man is only ever as old as he looks, and thank fuck David Jason looks not a day over.

Also his name is David Jason, not "grease-fisted Ringo painting".  Some of you need to remember that he's a human being with skin cells and some of his own teeth, not an MS Paint aberration with hands pitted from years of unrinsed swarfega layers.

The most moving part of his autobiography is when he descibes getting a standing ovation after his first performance as Godot at the palladium, a part written especially for him.


Kings Road, late 1975: Malcolm McLaren's plans for his shocking young "punk rock" group, provisionally known as "Davey J. and his Sex Pistols" are temporarily scuppered when his preferred choice of lead singer turns down the role.

David Jason: Kushty!
Bill Grundy: What was that?
David Jason: Kushty!
Bill Grundy (sarcastically): What an authentic boy.

Elderly Sumo Prophecy

I think it's entirely possible that David Jason is the reincarnation of our Lord Jesus Christ, and will one day announce His coming and lead His people to a New Eden.


Quote from: Elderly Sumo Prophecy on July 25, 2022, 10:38:52 PMI think it's entirely possible that David Jason is the reincarnation of our Lord Jesus Christ, and will one day announce His coming and lead His people to a New Eden.

I think it's more likely to be Nicholas Lyndhurst, though I have every confidence David Jason will take the credit.

Replies From View

David Jason would have been the drummer of the Beatles if he had been in the right place at the right time

Bennett Brauer

Still bitter about not breaking America because his name was spelt wrong in the credits for two seasons of Harry O.


David Jason auditioned for the role of Alfred Molina in Red Dwarf, after being asked by Rob Grant and Doug Naylor to read through the script and tell them if it seemed a bit racist

Cold Meat Platter

David Jason is still bitter about his bass being turned way down in the mix of ...And Justice for All