Peter's Mad Thoughts 2024

[non capisco]

I work for a visual effects company that uses these grey/chrome balls on film shoots to aid in matching light direction



Today I had the strong urge to walk around the building all day licking one like it was a lollipop and saying "Mmmmm.....yum yum. Have you tried these? They are delicious." to see if I could convince someone I was having some kind of breakdown.

[Bum Flaps]

Well, don't keep us hanging...what flavour are they?

[non capisco]

*Limmy voice* It tastes......of FUCK ALLLLLLL!

[Underturd]

You must not be licking it hard enough.

[Jerzy Bondov]

I thought your mad thought would be using the ball to bash someone's head in because that's what mine would be

[Elderly Sumo Prophecy]

Get two of them, run around waving them in people's faces and throwing superhero poses everywhere and call yourself Mirror Boy. Or The Orb.

[Captain Crunch]

Getting the urge to bellow "my wallet's gone! My wallet's gone!" in the planetarium. 

[Video Game Fan 2000]

Well, don't keep us hanging...what flavour are they?

tongue obviously

[Norton Canes]

[Shaxberd]

I was expecting you to say that you were wondering if it would fit up someone's arse. I consider it a near certainty that someone, somewhere, has tried it.

[thenoise]

[Elderly Sumo Prophecy]

Put the entire thing up your arse, stick end first. Ask people if they'd like their fortune read, and if they're like "Ooh, yes please!" say "Ok, let me consult my crystal ball", then drop your pants and squeeze out just the mirror ball.

Actually, can you remove the stick bit? That might make this a bit easier.

[Vodkafone]

Funny you should mention this non capisco, I've been having a mad thought recently of wanting to lick people's bald spots. Not actually wanting to lick them, but really strongly thinking about wanting to. Another reason not to attend a CaB meet.

[non capisco]

Another reason not to attend a CaB meet.

I'd say you'd be surprised how (mostly) hirsute those actually are.

[PlanktonSideburns]

Only need one for it to be a very akward night tho

[flotemysost]

Often eat a banana in the morning while en route to my office and have more than once thought about mindlessly and unceremoniously mashing one into the face of an oncoming passer-by, not even stopping or turning around, just blithely striding onwards as the bewildered victim wipes potassium-rich mulch from their face going "why, why"

Obviously they'd be having the last laugh because that'd be my breakfast banjaxed. I did once see someone on the Tube (irl) eating a banana and the last bit toppled out of the peel and did a sad little tumble to the grubby carriage floor, and its owner let out a dejected "huh" and then caught my eye and started laughing uncontrollably, a moment I probably still think about more than is normal.

[thenoise]

I'd say you'd be surprised how (mostly) hirsute those actually are.

Really? Fuck. How phimotic?

[Pavlov`s Dog`s Dad`s Dead]

Really? Fuck. How phimotic?

Considerably more so than Flotes' fellow commuter's banana.

[dontpaintyourteeth]

Someone did a tweet saying they'd found a baby fox and that the fox rescuers were on their way and I had a weird urge to quote tweet it going "the fox has since been humanely destroyed"

[Icehaven]

I live on a canal and have to fight a daily urge to throw anything and everything into it. My phone, my keys, the TV, the cat, everything.

[Vodkafone]

Someone did a tweet saying they'd found a baby fox and that the fox rescuers were on their way and I had a weird urge to quote tweet it going "the fox has since been humanely destroyed"

Worse, someone at work once put up a message saying they'd returned from their honeymoon in Tuscany "full of pizza and pasta", and I had to literally walk away so I didn't reply with "and cum, obviously".

Work ≠ CaB

[dex]

Was working on the Feeder Road, Bristol today and the irrational urge to just jump into the canal came into my headspace. Considering how anal my company QHSE policies are, having a debrief afterwards would of been excruciating.

[GoblinAhFuckScary]

do the little men on the inside not get a wee dizzy