This Clapham Chemical Attack Thing

[Catalogue Trousers]

You might have missed the tinfoil hat in my OP, but could this be a rabble rousing story?

Well, exactly. Despite its now having happened about a fortnight ago, this was still headline news yesterday as fresh speculation arose about the Evil Foreign Bastard having gone into the river.

Any acid attack is obviously alarming. I'm not belittling the victims in this case. But the fact that this guy has a suspiciously Muslamic name and appearance does seem to be being leaned on heavily. Got to have those plausible scapegoats.

[DelurkedToHelp]

How many bodies are in the Thames?

Two 'unexpected' bodies recovered from Thames in search for Abdul Ezedi

Two male bodies have been recovered from the River Thames as police search for a suspect who severely injured a "vulnerable" woman and her two young daughters in a chemical assault.

Neither body was identified as that of Abdul Ezedi, who has been on the run since the attack on 31 January in Clapham, south London. He was last seen walking "with purpose" to Chelsea Bridge in west London and was captured on CCTV leaning over the railings of the bridge on the night of the attack.

After that, there was a visible change in his behaviour, resulting in a "loss of sight", with no further CCTV footage of him coming off the bridge.

The bodies of two men were pulled from the river on Saturday, and both deaths are being treated by police as "unexpected pending further inquiries".

It is understood they were found not as a direct result of the search operation for 35-year-old Ezedi.

https://www.theguardian.com/uk-news/2024/feb/11/two-unexpected-bodies-recovered-from-thames-in-search-for-abdul-ezedi

[Zero Gravitas]

2-4 bodies are pulled from the Thames each month, statistically expected non-news.

[touchingcloth]

After that, there was a visible change in his behaviour, resulting in a "loss of sight"

No shit!

[BlodwynPig]

2-4 bodies are pulled from the Thames each month, statistically expected non-news.

Why the hell has my body not been dragged from the Thames?

[Paul Calf]

Jeez, a 17 year old getting stabbed to death by a 15 year old.  Things are only going to get worse as well essentially Birmingham is fucked until end of 2025.  I think the plan is to go for short sharp reduction in funding across the board to sort out the financial issues, but it means loads of stuff service wise is going.

I mean, that *is* a sensible way to deal with a crisis of demand, obviously...

[Zero Gravitas]

Why the hell has my body not been dragged from the Thames?

Same.

[touchingcloth]

This cunt dredged yet?

[imitationleather]

Please stop making jokes. A man has died.

[BlodwynPig]

Please stop making jokes. A man has died.

You're just jaded from all those corpses you've seen dragged out of the Tyne

[idunnosomename]

it is amazing how this story has blown up into attacking the CofE for baptising pesky immigrants so they can stay here and attack our women. even the BBC has been pushing it

[Mr Banlon]

Was mixing up some caustic soda to shove down the drain on Sunday. Some of the liquid spilled out of the container and onto my arm. It was literally on my skin for 2 seconds before I wiped it off and ran it under the tap. It didn't stop burning until I poured Pepsi on it (phoshoric acid to neutralise the alkali)
This it it two days later:


I can imagine having a whole bunch lobbed in your face when you don't know what it is, and not being near something to get it off or rinse it would have fucking horrific consequences.
(It's the main blotch on my arm, the rest of the blotching is just London Irishness)

[Captain Z]

Aye right, that's your story. We all know you got a Po from Teletubbies tattoo that you're now embarrassed about.

[Mr Banlon]

I think a tattoo of Po would be less embarrassing that burning myself with caustic soda, considering it's the second fucking time I've done it now.

[Mister Six]

The bodies of two men were pulled from the river on Saturday, and both deaths are being treated by police as "unexpected pending further inquiries".

"Having concluded our enquiries, we have now decided that the deaths were expected after all. No questions. Thank you."

[Sonny_Jim]

considering it's the second fucking time I've done it now.

What did the first one come out as, Basil Brush?

[GMTV]

Aye right, that's your story. We all know you got a Po from Teletubbies tattoo that you're now embarrassed about.

Eh? OH(-)

(couldn't help myself)

[touchingcloth]

Was mixing up some caustic soda to shove down the drain on Sunday. Some of the liquid spilled out of the container and onto my arm. It was literally on my skin for 2 seconds before I wiped it off and ran it under the tap. It didn't stop burning until I poured Pepsi on it (phoshoric acid to neutralise the alkali)
This it it two days later:


I can imagine having a whole bunch lobbed in your face when you don't know what it is, and not being near something to get it off or rinse it would have fucking horrific consequences.
(It's the main blotch on my arm, the rest of the blotching is just London Irishness)

Is it possible that the lad who burnt his eyes out before falling in the river was simply mixing some caustic soda up to use on a blocked drain in the Thames, but he didn't take the appropriate precautions and he accidentally tripped and got it on himself and his ex-partner before throwing her children around like ragdolls because he confused them for bottles of Pepsi?

[Gurke and Hare]

Is it possible that the lad who burnt his eyes out before falling in the river was simply mixing some caustic soda up to use on a blocked drain in the Thames, but he didn't take the appropriate precautions and he accidentally tripped and got it on himself and his ex-partner before throwing her children around like ragdolls because he confused them for bottles of Pepsi?

Possible, I suppose, but it seems unlikely.

[Blumf]

Possible, I suppose, but it seems unlikely.

There was a documentary about such a thing, presented by Michael Crawford if I remember correctly.

[touchingcloth]

Possible, I suppose, but it seems unlikely.

How unlikely? If you give infinity monkeys infinity bottles of caustic soda and infinity babies and then this will happen infinity times, and if you give them infinity time then you can multiply that by another infinity.