Your feet

[Inspector Norse]

Hiya Quentin mate

[Milo]

I had an acute gout attack in one a few months back and I tell you what, they aren't lying about how painful that is. Worst I've experienced and I've had the famously-painful appendicitis. Absolute pisstake.

[badaids]

ha ha feets are for losers you all need to get some hands like cool people lol

[seepage]

my ring finger is longer than my middle finger

[buttgammon]

Huge slabs of twisted flesh and mangled bone. 8/10.

[Utter Shit]

My feet are absolutely fucked due to the amount of football I've played over the past thirty years. Both my big toes have a little extended bit on the instep where blisters upon blisters have gradually just become a permanent additional bit of the toe. Hope you all picture that while you're enjoying your Friday treat maple and pecan Danish this morning.

[madhair60]

my toes are gnarled from years of too-small shoes

"but mum these don't fit"

"but they're in your size stuart, stop making a fuss"

"but they don't fit"

"THEY'RE IN YOUR SIZE OF COURSE THEY FIT"

wish i was making this up

[lauraxsynthesis]

Mads your mum was a monster and I hope she burns in hell

[madhair60]

thank you.

[SpiderChrist]

Got bit on the foot by something in the garden a few years back and had to go to the out of hours doc because my foot had swollen so much I couldn't get a shoe on. Mad painful.

Get to the docs and he asks me to show him the problem - I remove my sock and the first words out of the mouth of this medical professional were "Jesus, that's an ugly foot."

He weren't wrong, though.

[Brian Freeze]

You were right to check with me.  Go for it mate alright

Thanks pal, got all giddy now and am going to try my first multiquote.

I broke my little toe again a fortnight ago. You're just supposed to let them repair themselves. Doctors not arsed. Looks like a hairy date.

Same treatment for little fingers isn't it?

I'm no doctor but broke one last week.
No x-ray needed, it is semi-crooked and non straightenable anymore.

Not in too much pain so not worth the several hour wait to be seen somewhere is it?

My missus thinks my fucked feet and hands are due to my mum smoking and drinking like a right lass while she was pregnant.

Please explain about yer fucked hands thanks, got terrible circulation in mine.

[chip]

Way too many men in this thread for my liking

[The Crumb]

I got a thing last year where calcium built up in the achilles tendon where it meets the ankle and I couldn't walk on it for a few weeks. Not recommended.

On the plus side despite/because of mashing up my feet a lot with big walks, the skin on my soles has received a rapturous reception for its softness.

[Video Game Fan 2000]

i have several obvious deformities on both feet

[Pink Gregory]

i have several obvious deformities on both feet

those are called toes mate

[Video Game Fan 2000]

those are called toes mate

[looks down at bare feet] DEBATABLE

[jobotic]

I broke my little toe again a fortnight ago. You're just supposed to let them repair themselves. Doctors not arsed. Looks like a hairy date.

Don't blame him. If I looked like a hairy date I'd be worrying about that, not your broken toe.

[spaghetamine]

picking manky dry bits of skin off your feet is one of life's greatest pleasures, not in a sexy way though

[buttgammon]

picking manky dry bits of skin off your feet is one of life's greatest pleasures, not in a sexy way though

An odd fact of my relationship is that my partner enjoys doing this so much that she does it to my feet almost every day.

[Aaron500]

My feet are OK, couple of toenails doing their own thing but not painfully.

However, under no circumstances can anyone else touch my feet. Absolutely unbearable, get to fuck.

[machotrouts]

The toddler from Antichrist:

my toes are gnarled from years of too-small shoes

"but mum these don't fit"

"but they're in your size stuart, stop making a fuss"

"but they don't fit"

"THEY'RE IN YOUR SIZE OF COURSE THEY FIT"

wish i was making this up

[earl_sleek]

I get these weird cramps in my feet sometimes, usually in the evening or at night, never when standing. My big toe sticks right out and it fucking hurts, but doesn't last long. It used to happen only to my right foot but started to sometimes affect the left one too. I'm not sure what triggers it, sometimes twisting the foot in a certain way seems to but some days it just feels like the foot wants to spasm and I know it's likely to happen. I've mentioned it to various doctors and nurses over the years but they don't seem to think it's anything to worry about. Googling the symptoms doesn't help either, it can be caused by dehydration or certain mineral deficiencies but I don't think the three case with me. Bodies eh, cunts.

[tookish]

It's natural to hate feet, only freaks disagree. If we were keen on our feet maybe we wouldn't stand upright because we'd want to crouch on all fours and get a good whiff.

Mine are fucking horrid. Stick 'em in shoes and forget about them.

[salr]

Get a load of these freaky bad-boys:



38 years of Rheumatism will do that.

I had both operated on when I was younger to straighten them out a bit so they'd be even worse if not for that.

They broke all the bones in each foot and set them straight. Put a metal pin in there sticking out my big toe for six weeks to hold the fixed position in place while the bones healed. NHS gave me a small cork to stick on the end of the pin so I didn't end up accidently stabbing ppl when i was walking behind them.

[Buelligan]

It's all centimetres now, you fucking Farage grandas.

Anyway, my feet, like Faeces', seem a little small for my height.  I can hold a pen (or other writing implement) in my toes and write (or draw) with them.  I have independent control of my little toes (I can wiggle them without moving any other part of my foot).  In winter they wear wooly socks (clean) and slippers or walking boots.  In summer, they are bare or thonged or walking booted.  I get tan lines on them.  I was once impaled (like Jesus) right through the foot, it really fucking smarted and took months to glue back.  Other than that, great feet, would buy again.

That's all I know about my feet.  Thanks.

[TommyTurnips]

I like my feet and I think they're great. They got me to where I am today.

[Dex Sawash]

Thread title looping to this mixalot deep clip from deep track (should be time linked to save some misery)

https://youtu.be/6mDo7ILBW48?feature=shared


tl;dl my feets are icky



EDIT-TIME STAMP FUCKED DON'T BOTHER

[Pink Gregory]

my feet

are neat

they make my

legs complete

[Mr Farenheit]

I have the letters F I N G E R   M O U S S E tattooed on the knuckles of my toes

[tookish]

Maybe at the meet we'll have a foot comparison.