Occasions when other people shout at you in the street [renamed]

[An tSaoi]

I remember one time I went to the shop for a carton of milk. I didn't take a bag because I only bought the one. On the way back, cue some guy "Oi, it's the milk man! A-hur-hur-hur!" in an oddly aggressive tone as he walked past me. He thought it was the funniest thing ever, even though no-one else was there to hear it. He had a line shaved through one of his eyebrows; the handy signifier of a twat.

[Artemis]

Heh, that reminds me of the time I was walking home with my black backpack on and this lad shouted "BLACK BAG TWAT!". Lame.

Haha, that reminds me of "blue and white tosser" from the Iannucci shows.

[Big Jack McBastard]

Is it just me or does he look a bit like Rob Brydon and a moody Alan Partridge fused into one man?

[Queneau]

I did wonder why Cerys wasn't responding to me in the restaurant earlier. At least I had the deeply irritating kid to talk to. Clearly I've been a dead Ork since the beginning of the movie.

I'd happily fuck a racist but this one is just ugly.

I remember one time I went to the shop for a carton of milk. I didn't take a bag because I only bought the one. On the way back, cue some guy "Oi, it's the milk man! A-hur-hur-hur!" in an oddly aggressive tone as he walked past me. He thought it was the funniest thing ever, even though no-one else was there to hear it. He had a line shaved through one of his eyebrows; the handy signifier of a twat.

Again, I find this extremely funny.

[mycroft]

Anyway, I get called John Lennon a lot. Sometimes its Elton John.

What bloody idiots. It's obviously Robin Gibb.

[kngen]

Anyway, I get called John Lennon a lot.

Was it you that posted perhaps my favourite 'dealing with cunty public' posts from a couple of years back?

It went along the lines of ...

Bloke: 'Oi, John Lennon ... '
CaB poster: 'Oh, fuck off!'
Bloke: 'Ah, that'll be that famous Scouse wit I've heard so much about'

I love that. I really do.

[The Irrelephant Man]

Before I learned to drive a couple of years ago this used to happen to me a lot from people in cars when I was walking to work or into town. I found a noticable rise in these incidents during the summer when the warmer weather tends to tickle the dickhead behaviour gland in the English. That and the fact they have their windows down so can't resist hurling abuse at a slower moving target.

A former colleague was twice the victim of a drive-by egging. I never witnessed an egging, though I often saw the gooey evidence of such attacks on pavements - you could track the trajectory of the impact and conclude it was an attempted drive-by.

Another common occurrence is the pissed up slags leaning out the side of limos. I always make the point of looking anywhere but at them[nb]more the fool me because they're probably flashing their bangers, sigh[/nb], which tends to upset them more.

[madhair60]

Once, while walking, some cunts in a red car went zooming past me and one of them stuck his middle finger out the window  and shouted something indeterminate at me.  They then proceeded to veer up on the kerb and crash into a tree while I walked down a side road chortling, having found religion in that instance.

They were fine, probably.

[Still Not George]

I'd happily fuck a racist but this one is just ugly.

Wherethewhatnow?

[Goldentony]

Best one i've had from passengers in a car was "OI, He-Man!!" which was initially flattering, but on the whole just very annoying like every other time this has happened so I completely ignored it. Big mistake, as Beast Man and Trap Jaw went on to destroy an ASDA and loot over 17 houses in the Coventry area that day.

[madhair60]

I had that once, and when I turned around it was fucking Skeletor.  He was like that; "Ah, shit, sorry mate, I thought you were someone else".

[Goldentony]

Good job you didn't take your kecks off or he'd have clocked you like

[madhair60]

In his defence I was with She-Ra at the time

[Johnny Townmouse]

Is it just me or does he look a bit like Rob Brydon and a moody Alan Partridge fused into one man?

He does look a bit "I'm closing the bureau." In the flesh he was very high-pitched, and furtive little fellow. He reminded me of a young Aubrey Woods.

[HappyTree]

Was it you that posted perhaps my favourite 'dealing with cunty public' posts from a couple of years back?

Nah, wasn't me. I may have thought of saying that on occasion but the closest I've got is sighing heavily and looking cross at a chugger.

[Queneau]

Wherethewhatnow?

Eh?

[23 Daves]

Was it you that posted perhaps my favourite 'dealing with cunty public' posts from a couple of years back?

It went along the lines of ...

Bloke: 'Oi, John Lennon ... '
CaB poster: 'Oh, fuck off!'
Bloke: 'Ah, that'll be that famous Scouse wit I've heard so much about'

I love that. I really do.

No, that was me!  I used to have round shaded glasses as well.  I didn't get the Lennon thing a lot - largely because i actually look nothing like him - but this was a rare occasion.  And I think he actually replied "You've still got the famous Scouse wit then, John!".  To be fair, as I remember it I was in a bad mood to start with and certainly wasn't in the mood for some random berk taking the piss out of me (as I seldom am at the best of times), but I did laugh at that.

I've also just remembered that there are two shouting homeless men in Pimlico whose hobby is making random noises or hurling insults at passers-by.  I engaged one of them in conversation once when I was running early for work, and he claimed that they were both ex-members of the SAS.  Then the next time I saw him he told me that his friend wasn't, his friend was a fucking liar and I shouldn't believe a word he says, and only he was actually an ex-member of the SAS.  Apparently they'd just had a fight about who was the real SAS member.  Then he started talking about all the gay people he'd beaten up, and I just made my excuses and left him to it. 

Anyway, his abuse was quite uncreative as you'd expect, and mostly involved shouting "Fucking cunt!", "Lost your tampon love?" and "YEEEAHHH!" to passers by.  He's got his favourite spot, but I've started walking a different way to work now because he now recognises me and goes out of his way to get my attention.  The next time I have an urge to go up to some mad idiot to find out why they're behaving in a mad way, I should just discard the notion as a Peter Mad Thought.   

[An tSaoi]

Oi, you ginger!

[HappyTree]

As I walked home from school in Slough in 1979 there was this guy about 2 years older than me who regularly appeared at the other side of the road. He found it amusing to shout across the gaping chasm "Oi, are you a bender?"

I had no idea what he was talking about so I just said yes, which amused him greatly. Now I am older and world-weary I can see the humour in it. I had accidentally admitted to being gay!!

[Artemis]

I had accidentally admitted to being gay!!

LMAO

[imitationleather]

Why aren't you people drowning all this out with really fucking loud music?

[Still Not George]

Eh?

I'd happily fuck a racist but this one is just ugly.

Again I say, yerwha? That sentence doesn't even make sense.

[weaseldust]

i don't know why but people seem to think i'm french and therefore they shout at me

someone once shouted at me from a car: "want a croissant?"

and then another time some drunk guy shouted after me repeatedly "france'll win. france'll win." in a sarcastic voice (referring to some football match? i have no idea.) and then simply "je ne pas. je ne pas"

i just realised that i've posted this before

(by the way, someone should tell me if i've accidentally stolen this avatar from someone on here. i can't remember where i found it)

[Neville Chamberlain]

I was standing on that very spot just a couple of months ago watching local council workers attempt to remove a massive icicle hanging perilously from the roof of the Hansa building opposite!

Tis a shame we never met up so you could attack me with the sharp end of one of your crystals! :o)

Wow, it looks lovely there with the sun out. I have an urge to go back...!

[Queneau]

Again I say, yerwha? That sentence doesn't even make sense.

How doesn't it make sense? It implies I'd fuck a hot racist.

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

Why aren't you people drowning all this out with really fucking loud music?

Ah a very good tactic. Respond by shouting lines from Motown at them until the abuse stops. And not even then.

[Still Not George]

How doesn't it make sense? It implies I'd fuck a hot racist.

So... why the quote from me?

[Queneau]

You said she was trying to get laid, or something like that.

[Still Not George]

You said she was trying to get laid, or something like that.

OHHH. You just quoted the wrong bit. It looked like you were calling me an ugly racist on the basis of a poor Sixth Sense joke.

As for her being an ugger, well, that'll be why she's reduced to using racist chat-up lines.

[Queneau]

OHHH. You just quoted the wrong bit. It looked like you were calling me an ugly racist on the basis of a poor Sixth Sense joke.

Really? My apologies if so. I'd never call you an ugly racist. I've heard you're quite handsome.

As for her being an ugger, well, that'll be why she's reduced to using racist chat-up lines.

Surely she's want better chat up material if she was ugly? Trick people into thinking she has a decent personality?