1001 films that are NOT worth watching

[Head Gardener]

guess I will skip the London premiere of the lads film tonight

[BritishHobo]

Are people really still that outraged about the existence of anodyne, inoffensive boybands aimed at teenage girls?

[prwc]

The "directed by Morgan Spurlock" bit is a nice touch at least.

[Jerzy Bondov]

I feel like, in my day, anodyne inoffensive boy bands were less offensive and could sing. At least two of the men in Westlife were quite good at singing songs and they all had nice smiles, which is more than can be said for One Direction, whose records are so overproduced you're lucky if you can hear a single note that has come out of a human body.

[Subtle Mocking]

I feel like, in my day, anodyne inoffensive boy bands were less offensive and could sing. At least two of the men in Westlife were quite good at singing songs and they all had nice smiles, which is more than can be said for One Direction, whose records are so overproduced you're lucky if you can hear a single note that has come out of a human body.

They also tended not to be making money for an inhuman, blood-sucking gargoyle of a man. Still, it really isn't worth getting worked up over, because these things tend not to stick around for very long. Remember when Bros were selling out Wembley Stadium? Yeeeeaaaah.

[Sony Walkman Prophecies]

The properly offensive thing about these 'bands' is they've made "I write my own songs" a proud boast rather than an unspoken assumption.

[Sony Walkman Prophecies]

They've also turned me into a homosexual against my will.

[Subtle Mocking]

The properly offensive thing about these 'bands' is they've made "I write my own songs" a proud boast rather than an unspoken assumption.

A good artist would never say that. A bitter artist would.

[Famous Mortimer]

Cleavagefield

I was perhaps expecting too much from this recent Jim Wynorski film, after seeing the documentary about him. If you really, really like nude ladies, and aren't bothered about all the other stuff which normally would be in a film, then you might enjoy this; otherwise, I'd suggest "The Erotic Witch Project" for your movie parody thrills.

EDIT: I'm not really recommending that either - I've never seen it and it was the first rude parody of a horror film to pop into my head.

[Ralph Cifaretto]

A good artist would never say that. A bitter artist would.

A good artist doesnt give a shit what either of you's think, and keeps his mouth shut. A shit artist... oh wait!!!!!!!

[NoSleep]

The Reverend

A vampire reverend cleans up a town. Huge shot of Rutger Hauer on the DVD cover and he's in it for about a minute at the start. Features Shane Richie in the role of a pimp (looks like he watched Harvey Keitel in Taxi Driver for research) and the prostitute is Emily Booth (from Bits). Allegedly "from the graphic novel" although this bit of marketing failed as the tandem production of said book never got to publication.

Acquired from Poundland a couple of weeks back, so worth almost every penny.

[thecuriousorange]

That new Princess Diana film with Naomi Watts is getting an absolute pasting from critics.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/entertainment-arts-23985665

I'd say it's safe to assume that's not worth watching.

[billtheburger]

Apparently Ms Watts had a diva breakdown with Simon Mayo and walked out on their interview.

[Chichester Cathedral]

I downloaded Friday's podcast, only to find there was no Watts interview. "Oh the devious BBC," I thought to myself "They've cut the whole thing out and tried to brush it under the carpet like Stalin would do!" But it turns out that the interview was prerecorded for inclusion in next week's show, where it will feature in full after all. So there.

I can understand someone walking out of an interview (for example if they're asked inappropriate persona questions or there's a lot of muckraking), but I cannot understand someone walking out of an interview with Simon Mayo. He's the least tenacious interviewer I can imagine. It's not exactly going to be Frost/Nixon is it? Maybe it was Kermode who pissed her off.

[SteveDave]

Howl. Just pointlessness with shit animation.

[onthebeach]

I feel like, in my day, anodyne inoffensive boy bands were less offensive and could sing. At least two of the men in Westlife were quite good at singing songs and they all had nice smiles, which is more than can be said for One Direction, whose records are so overproduced you're lucky if you can hear a single note that has come out of a human body.

Oh man, in my day (which sounds a bit like your day) those boy bands were as shit as now. The only better thing about my day is that their managers were mostly behind the camera.

[vrailaine]

To be fair, Backstreet Boys had some tunes, man, and nsync was super sleek, almost a boyband caricature or some shit.

I could be missing the good one from now though, 1D seem to be the westlife.

[Jerzy Bondov]

Westlife shit all over 1D. Westlife fucking own bro. I'll come at ya!

[Steven]

http://t.co/K6mmg78QnW

Oh my dear Lord.

[El Unicornio, mang]

Heh. Rocky vs Ragin Bull. Oh dear. Kim Basinger still looks smoking hot at 59 though.

[Steven]

How much shit are they throwing at this wall? They got DeNiro, they got Stallone, they got the boxing rivalry, they got the cgi computer game graphics gimmick, they got the long-lost son side-story, the antagonised wife, and the wise-cracking inexplicable black friend written for Chris Rock character that they always shove into a crappy script like this. And was that a dictionary-based-jibe he did? You hear them all the time.

Ah, what happened to you Bob? Your ass used to be beautiful.

[SavageHedgehog]

Ah, takes me back to the consistently mediocre, easy viewing DeNiro vehicles of the early 00s. So nostalgic

[Tiny Poster]

Hm, it's actually an interesting premise, but neither Stallone nor De Niro can be trusted to do straight comedy. Sure, The King Of Comedy, Midnight Run and Jackie Brown are funny, but they aren't comedies (that work) like Meet The Parents.

Something that's just occurred to me: Stallone is better at crying on camera than De Niro.

[zomgmouse]

Billy "The Kid" McDonnen (De Niro) and Henry "Razor"  Sharp (Stallone)

Jesus Christicles.

[Steven]

Jesus Christicles.

Why are Hollywood writers so retarded when it comes to names? Schwarzaneggar always has some unbelievable name for his Austrian-accented character "Hi, I'm Tucker Johnson!"

Remember DeNiro and Pacino in that stinker Righteous Kill? The characters were called Turk and Rooster....

[Johnny Townmouse]

We have finally crossed the rubicon.

[Steven]

We're through the looking glass here, people.

The government's gonna jump all over you head Jimbo, and go cock-a-doodle-doo!

[Tiny Poster]

Why are Hollywood writers so retarded when it comes to names? Schwarzaneggar always has some unbelievable name for his Austrian-accented character "Hi, I'm Tucker Johnson!"

In the majority of Arnie films, he's playing a True American. The other characters all hear his voice as an American accent, for he embodies The American Dream.

[SavageHedgehog]

Yet for poor VanDamme they always tried to come up with feeble excuses for his accent (he's French Canadian! etc.)

[El Unicornio, mang]

Hm, it's actually an interesting premise, but neither Stallone nor De Niro can be trusted to do straight comedy.

De Niro is my fave all time actor (although I don't think he's the best all time actor, just my personal favourite) but I agree that he's just not good at comedic roles. He can be funny, for example his conversation with the secret services man in Taxi Driver, Johnny Boy in Mean Streets, and The King of Comedy (where he's playing someone who wants to be funny but isn't, so it works) but when he's playing for laughs it just doesn't work. But then, I think he's been stuck doing the same dull "De Niro thing" since the 90s.