Cook'd and Bomb'd

Forums => Comedy Chat => Topic started by: MoonDust on January 21, 2017, 08:57:22 AM

Title: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: MoonDust on January 21, 2017, 08:57:22 AM
I've been rewatching Knowing Me Knowing You for the first time in ages and forgot how many amazingly funny things this show has. One such moment is episode 4, where he's in France and has the French co-host, and he meets a French lorry driver whose also called Alan Partridge (but a Frenchified version) and Alan presents him with a bizarre painting of a British Bulldog with frog's legs, to celebrate the friendship of Britain and France.

(http://i.imgur.com/NpCveB3.jpg)

I laughed so hard at this bit. Completely forgot about it. Fucking great, and the look on the guy's face is golden:

(http://i.imgur.com/yjfGxzF.png)

Also on the episode where he has a sort of Question Time section, and the Conservative politician flips out at the Birmingham Slap Heads party guy: "You are a bloody shit!"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Bacon on January 21, 2017, 11:28:12 AM
Not sure if it's oft-forgotten by others, but I always forget how good the Joe Beesley and Cheeky Monkey performance is. Then I have to watch it over and over again.

Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: buttgammon on January 21, 2017, 11:36:06 AM
"Bloody buggering shitting buggerhead" has entered my lexicon, as has shouting "Bald Brummies!" They're two lines that improve any occasion.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Mobius on January 21, 2017, 02:26:19 PM
With a little bit

With a little bit

With a little bit'a bloomin' luck
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Lemming on January 21, 2017, 02:59:53 PM
Yachting mishaps - some funny, some tragic
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Tombola on January 21, 2017, 03:37:15 PM
HAVE YOU GOT ANY PUBIC HAIR??
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Dirty Boy on January 21, 2017, 03:44:20 PM
"Rubbish, crass, putrefying cack, drivel... that's what Melvin Bragg said..."

With a little bit

With a little bit

With a little bit'a bloomin' luck
That whole interview is a series highlight for me "Wipe that soppy look off yer gormless face!"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: manticore on January 21, 2017, 03:55:50 PM
"All nets are full of holes."

"It's menial work!"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: derek stitt on January 21, 2017, 04:07:51 PM
HAVE YOU GOT ANY PUBIC HAIR??

would love to see Bernard Cribbins play Hamlet
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Rolf Lundgren on January 21, 2017, 05:40:18 PM
Diddly dit dee dee 2 ladies

Alan talking about the phone-in of your favourite rough voiced winner - "They've been massacred by a late surge from rasping taffy Bonnie Tyler. I wonder how many she smokes". The whole of Anglian Lives is very underrated.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Milverton on January 21, 2017, 06:40:59 PM
"Like all feminists she combined a hatred of being sexualised with a fixation that everything is to do with sex."

- I, Partridge: We Need To Talk About Alan
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: shiftwork2 on January 21, 2017, 07:21:57 PM
The extended phone-in bit with Mary (https://youtu.be/4eUvk60DlPs).  Not a little unnerving, but very funny too.  Some corpsing evident from Mary, perhaps that's why they didn't use it.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Catalogue Trousers on January 21, 2017, 07:30:50 PM
'Sprünt! Sprünt!!!'
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Glebe on January 21, 2017, 11:21:45 PM
There's so many wonderful little lines/moments, I'd have to think about it... but going with an obvious one, when Alan meets Dan (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BXTZQB16p0Q), I love the way you can hear the audience cottoning on to him being a perfect buddy for Alan.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: BritishHobo on January 22, 2017, 12:39:36 AM
Recently discovered the clips of Alan doing a Kate Bush medley on two different occasions. I spent ages a couple of years ago attempting to collect every single Partridge appearance, but this somehow managed to pass me by. His bellowing, laddish performance of 'it's me, it's Cathy, I've COME HOME NOW', as if it's being shouted by a bloke storming into his house after ork expecting a shag and a hot meal, might be my new favourite bit of Partridge delivery.

Apart from Michael. Who died.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Noodle Lizard on January 22, 2017, 02:09:46 AM
"Like all feminists she combined a hatred of being sexualised with a fixation that everything is to do with sex."

- I, Partridge: We Need To Talk About Alan

The best bit is the line which follows:

"I mean do you like having it off or not?  Hellooooo?!"

Coogan's sing-song delivery of that sarcastic "Hello" is hilarious.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: iamcoop on January 22, 2017, 02:19:54 AM
There's a line in I, Partridge which is always popping into my mind and I'm not really sure why but it's when he describes being caught with a microwave in his room in the travel tavern as a result of its "unusually loud ding" which is a "common failing of many of the newer Sanyo's."

Even laughed as I typed that.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: HappyTree on January 22, 2017, 04:08:26 AM
KMKYWAP is my favourite of all AP. That French ep is a treasure trove. I think my favourite moment is when Alan is asking around about who knew about going to the Folies Bergères. He asks the lone accordion player if he knew as well and the look of amused contempt he gets in reply is something to behold.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Bacon on January 22, 2017, 07:55:27 AM
"Danny Franchetti's Jazz Box"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: batwings on January 22, 2017, 08:08:08 AM
Wrapping up his radio chat show after causing a boy genius to wet himself:

"...and from me, Alan Partridge, dry as a bone..."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: notjosh on January 22, 2017, 08:23:35 AM
Wrapping up his radio chat show after causing a boy genius to wet himself:

"...and from me, Alan Partridge, dry as a bone..."

That's one of my favourite episodes. I also like when he's on the back foot and panickingly claims to have seen a version of Hamlet starring Bernard Cribbins. Now whenever anyone mentions Bernard Cribbins I immediately hear Alan's intonation in my head.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Shay Chaise on January 22, 2017, 08:29:32 AM
"Of course you do, you little terror!"

"Even horses...even horses..."

Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Phoenix Lazarus on January 22, 2017, 09:02:14 AM
'I'm all for God, me.  Can't stand the Devil.  I think he's an evil idiot!'
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Bazooka on January 22, 2017, 09:12:46 AM
"Listeners, I have someone on the line who fears he may be a gay.
He's married so I shall only be using his Christian name.
I'm talking to Domingo in Little Oakley.
No? He's gone.
Pity."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Phil_A on January 22, 2017, 10:08:02 AM
I'm currently enjoying the Radio Norwich Comic Relief bits from 1999 and 2013.

Alan's weird mangling of words in the former is a nice little running thing I never noticed before

"...if you have the same name as a famous person or actor, or spurts porsenality..."

"Bladdackers' Rowan Atkinson, the rubber famousman...Bean."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Rolf Lundgren on January 22, 2017, 10:27:00 AM
I'm currently enjoying the Radio Norwich Comic Relief bits from 1999 and 2013.

On Bryan Ferry's Comic Relief donation - "Suffice to say it will buy you 2 microwave ovens. Or 3 and half Dyson vacuum cleaners"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: DrGreggles on January 22, 2017, 01:04:55 PM
"WHY!? Why do people have to die!?"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Glebe on January 22, 2017, 01:55:19 PM
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CmywrDBW3Us#t=2m58s
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: holyzombiejesus on January 22, 2017, 02:06:24 PM
Just been watching some Partridge clips on youtube and noticed on the episode of KMKYWAP when Alan reels off his list of nicknames for Lawrence Knowles and asks Lawrence if he would like to comment, the line "I have the same solicitor as Dave Lee Travis" has been removed.

My favourite line from IP:WNTTAA is when he's talking about his birth and how everyone ("a cool 100% audience share") in the delivery room heard him cry, he states "not bad, I probably thought, not bad at all."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Black_Bart on January 22, 2017, 02:17:18 PM
"I'm being bawdy, Lynn. Enjoy it"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Twed on January 22, 2017, 02:23:46 PM
"Listeners, I have someone on the line who fears he may be a gay.
He's married so I shall only be using his Christian name.
I'm talking to Domingo in Little Oakley.
No? He's gone.
Pity."
This is such a gift to me, as my grandmother lives in Little Oakley[nb]I grew up in Great Oakley[/nb]. It's such a tiny place to be referenced, and Domingo really would stand out like a sore thumb.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Huxleys Babkins on January 22, 2017, 03:26:34 PM
"There's dozens of Cromwells! They're in the phone book for Christ's sake! I've got a friend called Cromwell! He's called Cresswell actually. I need to call him back."

"Sometimes that meant being ruthless, a trait I demonstrated when grabbing the first interview with javelinner Steve Backley after a quite lovely throw at Crystal Palace. Seeing ITV’s Jim Rosenthal jostling for position, I sidled up behind him, muttered ‘Hello Jim’ and, as he turned to respond, he fell/was pushed off the media rostrum. He landed on a stack of hurdles, suffering cuts and bruises as well as some seriously duffed-up pride. Well, Gary Newbon went spastic. The two of them were the Tweedle Dum and Tweedle Doo of ITV Sport –great friends on and off camera –and our feud was real and long-standing. Newbon tore his jacket off, then his shirt, pounding at his belly and tits and shouting ‘Come on then! Come on!’ It was incredibly unseemly and I know Gary was kept away from athletics events for a good while after that.

I secured the interview and asked Backley some searching questions about his training regime, skin-tight sportswear and marital status. The piece went out that night. You could see Newbon in the background, facing away from camera but slumped on a folding chair (by then in tears), but needless to say I had the last laugh."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Ptolemy Ptarmigan on January 22, 2017, 03:30:50 PM
"Listeners, I have someone on the line who fears he may be a gay.
He's married so I shall only be using his Christian name.
I'm talking to Domingo in Little Oakley.
No? He's gone.
Pity."
This is such a gift to me, as my grandmother lives in Little Oakley[nb]I grew up in Great Oakley[/nb]. It's such a tiny place to be referenced, and Domingo really would stand out like a sore thumb.

It's the "Marvellous little tapas bar there" at the end that really caps the joke.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Absorb the anus burn on January 22, 2017, 03:38:56 PM
Christmas KMKYWAP is still the most quotable Partridge... It's still my favourite.

"Jews Are Good...... Is it a Rover?....... Ramadam-a-dingdong.... Can we get a drink for the Christian..... Give it a good stuffing. Oooh, pardon.... Hmmm that's a nice action.... That's a quality action....... I'm still a virgin. Well done..... In five months I will be giving birth to a little baby heron. Not literally, that would be revolting.... Put my face out!.... Do the mince pies taste a bit minty?... What's onanism?......... God is a gas - not Calor gas or anything like that....? Was Dr. Hook a real doctor?"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: notjosh on January 22, 2017, 03:42:17 PM
Just been watching some Partridge clips on youtube and noticed on the episode of KMKYWAP when Alan reels off his list of nicknames for Lawrence Knowles and asks Lawrence if he would like to comment, the line "I have the same solicitor as Dave Lee Travis" has been removed.

Maybe it wasn't in the original broadcast. I seem to remember that the DVD features extended versions of all the episodes.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Here Comes Mongo on January 22, 2017, 03:51:20 PM
I haven't seen too much Partridge stuff so I'm not sure if this is forgotten as such, but recently I've been chuckling about "Let's say for an instant that I am a gaym'n" from this sketch: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h9RrlXSMkt0
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Lemming on January 22, 2017, 05:09:16 PM
(suddenly being woken up while leaning against the bar)
"I'M CONFUSED"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: holyzombiejesus on January 22, 2017, 05:21:34 PM
Maybe it wasn't in the original broadcast. I seem to remember that the DVD features extended versions of all the episodes.

It definitely was. There was a running joke about DLT. "The Hairy Cornflake shed a tear!"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: ArtParrott on January 22, 2017, 06:31:44 PM
Alpha Papa was on TV again over xmas and since then whenever I see eggs in my house I can't not hear...

"Today we're asking, why do people keep their eggs in the fridge?

Once again, why do people insist on keeping their eggs in the fridge?"

(I keep eggs in the fridge btw)
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: CaptainInvincible on January 22, 2017, 09:37:30 PM
 That was My Watch! Ive just lost my, bloomin Gold Watch! Ha! Oh well - keep it in, shows its real.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: HappyTree on January 22, 2017, 10:14:19 PM
How do you ride a horse?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: PlasticTom on January 22, 2017, 11:48:02 PM
I shared that thought with TV comedian Alan Carr and told him he could have it for free. He laughed. The guy's a breath of fresh air. Some people unkindly say the deaths of Inman, Harty and Grayson have put talented entertainers like Carr back into some kind of closet. I hope not. I've long lobbied the BBC for the reintroduction of a primetime TV homosexual.
And yet some people have accused me of intolerance or homophobia, a word that didn't exist before 1980 - if you'd have used that term before then, people would have thought you were referring to some kind of science fiction disease. Uh-huh. Not me. Although, call me old-fashioned, but in my day public toilets were for pissing and shitting.
It seems that now it's not a criminal offence, it's fine for TV homosexuals to be 'active'. Is that a good thing? I'll remain above the fray. That's for you, the reader, to decide.
Although, if pushed, I'd say that if the 'activity' remains in a private dwelling or hotel, is genuinely consensual and the age disparity is under a decade, let them broadcast."



Footnote 150, p154 - IP:WNTTAA


[spoiler]"Genuinely consensual"[/spoiler]
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: non capisco on January 22, 2017, 11:51:52 PM
I've always loved Coogan's ad lib "No manners, but what a critic" after the horse shits on the set in the background of KMKYWAP.

I don't know if it's exactly oft-forgotten but his new comedy character 'Camp David' is something I find impossible to watch just the once. "Wooooohhhhhhh, hello, Alan!" The fact it's obviously his voice.

As someone else has already nominated the enduring pathos of Joe Beazley and Cheeky Monkey is for me the high watermark of all Alan Partridge things. I found it both hysterical and faintly sad on its first broadcast in 1994 and I'm still a bit obsessed with it to this day, a plaintive still image of Joe Beazley has been my work screensaver for a long while now. John Thomson is just perfect. There are so many tiny details to savour in his brief performance.

His entrance when the puppet's limitations are immediately apparent and he has to pretend the monkey is intent on pulling him across the stage away from the mic. "What do you get if you cross Fred Flintstone....no, not what if you cross...." The bleak brilliance of Cheeky Monkey going bezerk with its head to the sky during the fluffed first "Yabba Dabba Dooooooo!" "The other week....pack it in, you!" "They've got the biggest rollercoaster in the world, it's massive...(flounders) Int'it? (makes monkey vigorously nod)"  Probably the best bit, when Cheeky Monkey's hands become separated and he quietly mutters "Oh, god", then fails to reattach them and just stands there with one of the hands lamely pressed against his chest. The cutaway to a nervous looking Alan. "It's his fault, ladies and gentlemen, he's made me forget!" Fuck man, it's so brilliant and I might have to watch it again now.

"Hold onto your sides, they might just split!"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Glebe on January 23, 2017, 01:06:32 AM
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m4T_4uLQ7e0#t=49s

The audience laughs at "The guy obviously had talent," missing the "that's the tragedy" bit. This displeases me.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: purlieu on January 23, 2017, 04:39:18 AM
Between radio, TV, film and book, there are so many absolutely brilliant Partridge moments, but none make me laugh so much as his straining during the 'Thank You for the Music' section of the ABBA medley. I have no idea if it's being a musician that makes it appeal to me so much, but it just sums up his striving to be more than he actually is better than anything else; plus it's such an inherently hilarious sound. Maybe not the most obscure, but the one that gets me more than any other.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Noodle Lizard on January 23, 2017, 05:18:26 AM
I've always loved Coogan's ad lib "No manners, but what a critic" after the horse shits on the set in the background of KMKYWAP.

Surely that was Patrick Marber.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: non capisco on January 23, 2017, 07:19:05 AM
Surely that was Patrick Marber.

Yeah. Mistype!
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Bacon on January 23, 2017, 07:20:06 AM
As someone else has already nominated the enduring pathos of Joe Beazley and Cheeky Monkey is for me the high watermark of all Alan Partridge things. I found it both hysterical and faintly sad on its first broadcast in 1994 and I'm still a bit obsessed with it to this day, a plaintive still image of Joe Beazley has been my work screensaver for a long while now. John Thomson is just perfect. There are so many tiny details to savour in his brief performance.

His entrance when the puppet's limitations are immediately apparent and he has to pretend the monkey is intent on pulling him across the stage away from the mic. "What do you get if you cross Fred Flintstone....no, not what if you cross...." The bleak brilliance of Cheeky Monkey going bezerk with its head to the sky during the fluffed first "Yabba Dabba Dooooooo!" "The other week....pack it in, you!" "They've got the biggest rollercoaster in the world, it's massive...(flounders) Int'it? (makes monkey vigorously nod)"  Probably the best bit, when Cheeky Monkey's hands become separated and he quietly mutters "Oh, god", then fails to reattach them and just stands there with one of the hands lamely pressed against his chest. The cutaway to a nervous looking Alan. "It's his fault, ladies and gentlemen, he's made me forget!" Fuck man, it's so brilliant and I might have to watch it again now.

"Hold onto your sides, they might just split!"


Yea Thompson is amazing here. I love the way he starts slapping cheeky monkey when he forgets the joke.

Also seems like Thompson nearly cracks up around the 1min41 mark

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D49d75blINA

Alan's laugh as he walks on stage at 18secs is brilliant.

'You've got a big problem'
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: yesitsme on January 23, 2017, 09:58:56 AM
The best bit of Cheeky Monkey is where Beesley (storming off stage) flings the puppet away in a temper, just twizzes him across the studio - fantastic. It's closely followed by '...oh look you've made him cry no laydengentlemen look - he's sad.  DON'T TOUCH IT!'

Coogan's quip when the horse takes a shit is that it was in the 'very same studio' as the Blue Peter elephant.

Going back to Cheeky Monkey, I've seen the thing that's based on (it has to be) but have never met anyone else who has.

It's a 3-2-1 skit where the bloke turns up with a really low rent Rod Hull 'emu' puppet and performs what can only be described as a 'load of shite' (even by 3-2-1 standards) for five minutes.

When he comes over to the podium even the guy's laughing at how bad it was, Rodgers tries to make some small talk 'Where did you get the puppet?' he asks 'Bought it on the way here' replies the act, obviously delighted to get his £300.00 or whatever ITV paid in those days.  The notion that mainstream, big time Saturday night entertainment could be made up in the car drive from home to the studio is surely a thing of lost beauty.

Do any other Metro readers remember seeing that?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: jobotic on January 23, 2017, 10:21:23 AM
I've never seen it but your description of it made me laugh out loud, which I'm not in the habit of doing. "Bought it on the way here".

I often say "oh god" in a John Thompson way - I love that bit.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: yesitsme on January 23, 2017, 10:28:36 AM
"I'm being bawdy, Lynn. Enjoy it"

See the laugh Lynn does there?  There's a Lynn-a-Like in here who does that laugh when she doesn't get the joke.

I wonder if it comes as standard?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Cuellar on January 23, 2017, 10:51:04 AM
"A sexy trio of models I called my Christmas Crackers, and Mick Hucknall, because he was - in his words - trying to bang one of them"
-I, Partridge
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Norton Canes on January 23, 2017, 11:25:38 AM
(suddenly being woken up while leaning against the bar)
"I'M CONFUSED"

(suddenly being woken up by Lynn in his room)
"FIGHT YOU"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: non capisco on January 23, 2017, 11:32:51 AM
'Never Say Alan Again' is probably my least favourite IAP episode but it does have his observation that Dr. Pepper "tastes like fizzy Benilyn."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Uncle TechTip on January 23, 2017, 11:37:32 AM
You're sacked! You're a sacked man, you've been sacked! Consider yourself sacked! You're subject to a sacking! I want you out of the studio! Knowing me, Alan Partridge, SACKING you, Glenn Ponder! A-ha!
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Cuellar on January 23, 2017, 12:22:23 PM
It's good this, isn't it? Even though we're basically just listing bits from Partridge, forgotten or not.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: doppelkorn on January 23, 2017, 12:41:42 PM
"Sheep and goat and onion busters? I don't think they're in the yellow pages."

also

"...had some bad scampi"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Concerned But Powerless on January 23, 2017, 12:46:14 PM
There's a line in I, Partridge which is always popping into my mind and I'm not really sure why but it's when he describes being caught with a microwave in his room in the travel tavern as a result of its "unusually loud ding" which is a "common failing of many of the newer Sanyo's."

So good. I can't remember for sure but I think he tries wrapping the duvet around the microwave to try and muffle the sound of the ding.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: BritishHobo on January 23, 2017, 01:42:46 PM
I've always found it a sad thing that, until the film at least, IAP seemed to be the only Partridge thing people knew or referenced, because both KMKYWAP series are full of incredible moments. Everyone's fantastic in them, but I'm always especially saddened to think Marber gets no recognition for some incredible characters and some of the funniest moments in the canon (as well as, you know, being somewhat of a major contributor early on). Two moments that always pop into my head at random points over the years are Keith Hunt forgetting his son's birthday and floundering on the spot when Alan asks if he has anything he wants to say to his son - "See your dad on the telly last week?" - and that bit after Alan persuades the actress's husband to fix a printer, and he gives Alan a tip about where to store paperclips before pausing and contemptuously going 'I don't do that shit anymore.'

To go even more obscure, the Day Today special feature where Alan chats to Chris Morris about Diana and JFK is a worn favourite of mine. 'There's so much about the world you don't know, Chris. I mean, you're, you're very- you're quite good at your job, but there are so many... do you think the Prime Minister runs the world? Does he heck. What a laugh.' 'Who does run the world, Alan?' 'Trade unions.'
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Dirty Boy on January 23, 2017, 02:23:28 PM
"three men burning in a tank going euuuurghh!"

"You should have a decent grasp of Latin if you're working in Currys".

"Through the chicane... through the chicane... amazing!"

also in OTH his endless obsession with groin strain "i've heard it's a bit like a banjo string snapping".
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: yesitsme on January 23, 2017, 02:31:09 PM
I've always found it a sad thing that, until the film at least, IAP seemed to be the only Partridge thing people knew or referenced, because both KMKYWAP series are full of incredible moments.....'

I think pretty much ALL of Coogan is 100% quotable, it's up there with Python and The Simpsons when it comes to having a line for every moment.  Even if it's just 'bag o'shite' or 'time for a wank' to 'What's dignity?  THIS...This is dignity...basically' (owtte)

As for yer Thompson yer Marber and yer rest of the cast of this world they're all pretty top notch whether back ground members of the band, Tony Le Mesmers or one of the clowns, Nina Vanier or whoever.  A great ensemble.

'He's wry, he's spry, he's crisp 'n' dry.....!
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: ArtParrott on January 23, 2017, 02:50:26 PM
"Is that a distributor cap from a Ford Mondeo?"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Swoz_MK on January 23, 2017, 03:30:06 PM
Nice action
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Morrison Lard on January 23, 2017, 03:45:48 PM
"The loony breakfast show on Radio Leeds."

The various weapons he's using at the start of KMKY.

"Remarkable."

Marber licking his fingers when miming counting out the money.

"Mike Taylor from TV Quick."

Mary humming the Match of the Day theme.

Turner's Kitchen Solutions.

"Listen to me, and look at her. Don’t get it the other way round, please, that would be awful."

Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Bacon on January 23, 2017, 04:20:41 PM
After the french clown performance, Alan sits back in his seat not realising the clown is sat there

the way he says 'What are you doing there?!' is brilliant
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Gulftastic on January 23, 2017, 05:35:21 PM
Alan drumming his hands on the coffin of the other Alan Partridge in KMKYWAP.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: holyzombiejesus on January 23, 2017, 06:02:50 PM
Immigration - it's a political hot potato. Charlotte Rampling, catch.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: BritishHobo on January 23, 2017, 07:29:27 PM
I think pretty much ALL of Coogan is 100% quotable, it's up there with Python and The Simpsons when it comes to having a line for every moment.  Even if it's just 'bag o'shite' or 'time for a wank' to 'What's dignity?  THIS...This is dignity...basically' (owtte)

As for yer Thompson yer Marber and yer rest of the cast of this world they're all pretty top notch whether back ground members of the band, Tony Le Mesmers or one of the clowns, Nina Vanier or whoever.  A great ensemble.

'He's wry, he's spry, he's crisp 'n' dry.....!

It is, but I feel like outside of here people only ever go for IAP stuff - Jurassic Park, Dan, monkey tennis, smell my cheese etc, and Lynn and Michael are the only remembered characters.

Need to relisten to the radio show.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: DrGreggles on January 23, 2017, 10:49:41 PM
"It's a good idea, I agree with it."

"Right. Mine is 'Robin's Nest'."

"So I couldn't call you that?"
"No, but you could fax me."
"What if I wrote it on a piece of paper and held it up to your face?"
"That would be perfectly legal, yes... And people do do that."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: batwings on January 23, 2017, 11:01:13 PM
Alan: "Recently, you've been an outspoken defender of pornography?! What's that about?"
Lord Morgan of Glossop: "What a man chooses to do in the privacy of his own attic, is his business alone."

"...immovable, beneath this hastily-improvised pringle shroud."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: the midnight watch baboon on January 23, 2017, 11:01:44 PM
No offence Lynne, but your life is technically not worth insuring.

Barney. Barney the dog.

It was the only time I ever heard a swan quack.


Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Van Dammage on January 23, 2017, 11:02:32 PM
"That's just noise"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: brownjam on January 23, 2017, 11:24:02 PM
I love this (apparently improvised) scene which was cut from IAP series 1. You can see them both trying not to laugh at certain points: "OH MY GOD YOU'RE LOW ON WINDSCREEN WASHER FLUID!" 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PM8LLp7Q5WQ
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Detective John Kimble on January 24, 2017, 12:13:37 AM
Couple of OTH Sports Desk gems:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OqCHiu3-5oE - particularly his commentary over the F1 race.  The way Alan emphasises "PIQUET" every time kills me.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OqCHiu3-5oE - everything, but...

"Well Graham Gooch, all out for 36!  That was quick, you must be pleased."
"I hear you've been having a bit of trouble in the groin department..."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Twed on January 24, 2017, 12:19:49 AM
I love this (apparently improvised) scene which was cut from IAP series 1. You can see them both trying not to laugh at certain points: "OH MY GOD YOU'RE LOW ON WINDSCREEN WASHER FLUID!" 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PM8LLp7Q5WQ
Felicity Montagu is so good, and so underrated. Wow, she was only in her mid-30s when she played the perfect mousy 50 something.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Ptolemy Ptarmigan on January 24, 2017, 12:28:56 AM
Couple of OTH Sports Desk gems:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OqCHiu3-5oE - particularly his commentary over the F1 race.  The way Alan emphasises "PIQUET" every time kills me.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OqCHiu3-5oE - everything, but...

"Well Graham Gooch, all out for 36!  That was quick, you must be pleased."
"I hear you've been having a bit of trouble in the groin department..."

The sports desk produced a couple of phrases that always automatically come to mind when I see the Boat Race and horseracing on TV: "Where are the others?" on OTH, and TDT's "Dunno what that is" at the close-up of the finishing post.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Tikwid on January 24, 2017, 02:18:20 AM
To go even more obscure, the Day Today special feature where Alan chats to Chris Morris about Diana and JFK is a worn favourite of mine. 'There's so much about the world you don't know, Chris. I mean, you're, you're very- you're quite good at your job, but there are so many... do you think the Prime Minister runs the world? Does he heck. What a laugh.' 'Who does run the world, Alan?' 'Trade unions.'
Oh yes. Honestly one of my favourite Partridge bits ever.
THE FBI KNEW ABOUT CDS FOR AAAAAGES
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Shay Chaise on January 24, 2017, 03:40:18 AM
I love this (apparently improvised) scene which was cut from IAP series 1. You can see them both trying not to laugh at certain points: "OH MY GOD YOU'RE LOW ON WINDSCREEN WASHER FLUID!" 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PM8LLp7Q5WQ

Fucking hell, I'm crying my eyes out at that. I don't know how I've never seen it before but that is sensational. The fucking clock. How Coogan holds it together, even he is momentarily speechless at how funny that line is.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Glebe on January 24, 2017, 04:26:26 AM
Fucking hell, I'm crying my eyes out at that. I don't know how I've never seen it before but that is sensational. The fucking clock. How Coogan holds it together, even he is momentarily speechless at how funny that line is.

I'm sure I saw that before, but I don't recall them trying not to corpse... Felicity Montague is definitely struggling at points there.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: HappyTree on January 24, 2017, 05:27:20 AM
Peak sports Alan has to be the racecourse in the rain. When he interviews the jockey: Hello, how are you? - I'm very well. It's the little "Are you now?" that makes it.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Repeater on January 24, 2017, 08:40:12 AM
"Challet"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: non capisco on January 24, 2017, 09:26:36 AM
Peak sports Alan has to be the racecourse in the rain. When he interviews the jockey: Hello, how are you? - I'm very well. It's the little "Are you now?" that makes it.

"Don't know what that is."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Cuellar on January 24, 2017, 10:39:15 AM
On Wine

"...currants?"
"No no no no no...it's very specific"
"...well it's musky, so..
"...no, no no"
"..."
"..."
"...berries?"
"No Rosie, that's wrong"

-MMM

Love the way he seems really annoyed when she suggests berries
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: yesitsme on January 24, 2017, 10:51:17 AM
The foot/spike/speech 'it's a goooood pappppurrrgh' gets a lot of praise and quite rightly so, I almost died laughing the first twelve times I saw that but the conversation with the South African owner of Dante's Fires is almost as funny.

The rolling stuff up and down the 'table' to balance it, the 'did you see that?', 'Yes', torches as lights and Lynn whacking on the full beam.

Great.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Norton Canes on January 24, 2017, 11:43:02 AM
"Hot hot hot hot ham"

"Pop not broth"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: madhair60 on January 24, 2017, 11:44:21 AM
The rolling stuff up and down the 'table' to balance it, the 'did you see that?', 'Yes', torches as lights and Lynn whacking on the full beam.

You've got to laugh when you fall off a sofa!
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Cuellar on January 24, 2017, 11:52:49 AM
So many great bits from MMM.

When he's filling in on the 'Norfolk Today' program and gets a bit delirious at the end, signing off by saying:

"You've been listening to Alan Partridge, with special guest Tory Bronwen.."
"..Tory councillor Bronwen Matthews..."

and "Me, Alan Partridge, standing in for Eddie Shadow...Shepherd" after saying earlier "Fingers crossed it's just a shadow on the x-ray"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Norton Canes on January 24, 2017, 11:56:40 AM
From Saxondale, but it could so easily be Partridge

While drunkenly remonstrating with the members of a Queen tribute band, Tommy leans on a side table and accidentally knocks over a bowl of fruit. After carefully replacing the bowl and its contents, exactly the same thing happens a minute later.

"I've done it agaaain..."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Norton Canes on January 24, 2017, 11:58:53 AM
INCEPTION

NO

INCEPTION

NO

INCEPTION

NO

INCEPTION

NO
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Bacon on January 24, 2017, 12:12:15 PM
'No Sophie they cleared the cave'
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: holyzombiejesus on January 24, 2017, 12:25:37 PM
Nomad. Alan bemoaning the fact that he hadn't had chance to visit "Neil Buchanan's flat or Michaela Strachan's commune."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Cuellar on January 24, 2017, 01:20:00 PM
"If I had a pound for every time someone used an acronym that actually extended syllable count I'd be a...mil-"
"Billionaire"
"No..millionaire" *hilarious facial expression and hand gesture*
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Crabwalk on January 24, 2017, 04:34:13 PM
OTH:

'Keith won! Great!' (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c-6FKK0Pw6g)

The 'Summer of Sport' package might be my most cherished slice of Partridge. Christ knows how many times I've listened to those few minutes over the past 25 years. Sheer genius, right up to the last line '...as well as the Olympics'.

Of course, Alan was a slighter character when he was essentially a David Coleman parody, but I love the pure silliness and absurdity of early Partridge and that glorious voice, still unfettered by naturalism.

KMKY R4:


'I'm sorry...I'm not very good with kids. But you are a little shit'. (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kdZtM3_Lcy4)

The Simon Fisher interview is the funniest Partridge interview on either medium, for me. The way a child decimates him on just his second appearance as a talk show host, pricking all his social and intellectual insecurities, making him combust and thus setting the pattern for his whole career, is great.

KMNY TV:

Yvonne Boyd: 'What if your arm bursts?'

Alan Partridge: 'What?'

Yvonne Boyd: 'What if your arm bursts?'

Alan Partridge: 'Sorry, I've heard of a nosebleed, but in my 14 years of professional broadcasting, including 3 years as a hospital radio disc jockey, I've never had anyone come up to me and say "My arm's just burst. Could you play a dedication?"'

Fuck me, that's an unheralded highlight alright. I really love those fashion characters in the radio series too. 'I can still see it!' I can't get it out of my head!' (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=79Ghl6gXQ-I). In the talk show Alan often looks a total prat but he regularly gets some sort of last laugh over anyone pompous or pretentious. I love him rubbing up against those types.

IAP:

'Got your big plate Alan?'

Susan gets this line of course, from the back of the shot, and it's just a perfect moment. His attempt at a dignified retreat to his room - for his choclolate mousse-fulled attempted romp with Jill - is shattered at the last moment as his scam is blown wide apart. 'Alan Attraction' is my favourite TV episode of Partridge and is crammed with superb, quotable lines but that's an especially brilliant pay-off I think. And then it cuts to that failed attempt at twisting a towel around his neck - a fantastic little sight gag in its own right.

Enough gushing.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Bacon on January 24, 2017, 04:51:33 PM
'She's made more hot dinners than I've had hot dinners'
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: jobotic on January 24, 2017, 09:33:13 PM
I'm sure it's not forgotten but "So just to re-emphasise one more time, her contract has been terminated."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Paul Calf on January 24, 2017, 10:31:40 PM
IAP: The Norfolk Bravery Awards when he introduces 'Single-Hand Sue'. The look on his face as he steals glances at her prosthetic hand is just sublime.

It's here:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h8Uu0UMLSrI&feature=youtu.be&t=1m10s
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: non capisco on January 24, 2017, 11:50:05 PM
Diddle-di-dit-di-dee, two ladies! Diddle-di-dit-di-dee, two ladies! Diddle-di-dit-di-dee, and I'm the only man, ja! Diddle-di-dit-di-dee, I like it! Diddle-di-dit-di-dee, they like it! Diddle-di-dit-di-dee, this two for one, ba-dum-ba-dum-bum.........I'm sorry, that was misjudged.

Alan's intonations of those lyrics is a joke I only fully appreciated when I actually saw Cabaret some years after KMKYWAP.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Crabwalk on January 25, 2017, 09:50:12 AM
^ Yes, the same thing happened to me! Saw it in the West End and almost jumped out of my chair when that bit came up!
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: MoonDust on January 25, 2017, 09:57:54 AM
Some great gems in here!

"Sonia, you are not the chancellor of the exchequer!"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: ajsmith on January 25, 2017, 09:59:00 AM
Worth of Boast Worlds.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Cuellar on January 25, 2017, 10:08:23 AM
At the beginning of Scissored Isle

"The clip went viral" - shot of the clip on youtube, 150 views in the bottom corner.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Mobius on January 25, 2017, 10:32:35 AM
At the beginning of Scissored Isle

"The clip went viral" - shot of the clip on youtube, 150 views in the bottom corner.

Also has Lynn's Youtube comments

"only god can smite him"
"what is revenge porn"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Cuellar on January 25, 2017, 11:01:32 AM
I'll stop adding to this thread soon, but one more came back to me.

Towards the end of Nomad, when he's 'finished' the walk and is back in the pool and breaks down when talking to Dawn.

He says "When I finish speaking there's a silence, broken only by the sound of another boy doing a bomb".

That 'another' is so well placed, and reveals so much about Partridge; still the boy belittled by his father. I've always liked those moments, more prevalent in the later Partridge. Like when he recognises his old teacher in Places of My Life (I think) and gets out and confronts him. From the mimes you can tell the teacher wasn't very nice to him.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Hangthebuggers on January 25, 2017, 11:37:47 AM
Nomad - When he's walking down the dual carriage way backwards with a cats eye in his mouth.
--

There's nay porn on it.

Was she born in a wheel chair?

Come on Pete back on your feet!

That tree looks like a spider!

What an odd man. Are we absolutely sure he's actually a Vicar? I mean... Where's he going?

And then I fought some zombies with a boy in care.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: MoonDust on January 25, 2017, 11:54:33 AM
I actually signed myself in under the name 'the Real IRA'! I'll just go and let them know it's me...

....change of plan....crossed wires.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: yesitsme on January 25, 2017, 12:03:43 PM
I'll stop adding to this thread soon, but one more came back to me.

Towards the end of Nomad, when he's 'finished' the walk and is back in the pool and breaks down when talking to Dawn.

He says "When I finish speaking there's a silence, broken only by the sound of another boy doing a bomb".

That 'another' is so well placed, and reveals so much about Partridge; still the boy belittled by his father. I've always liked those moments, more prevalent in the later Partridge. Like when he recognises his old teacher in Places of My Life (I think) and gets out and confronts him. From the mimes you can tell the teacher wasn't very nice to him.

I was thinking of that bit where he claims to have 'bested' Dawn - he didn't, we've seen he can't swim and while anyelse would have learned to swim I'm sure Alan's powerful mix of  procrastination and pride wouldn't have allowed him.  That reminded me of the bit where he's interviewing someone in a pool and he's struggling to keep his head above water then it jump cuts to him nodding to their replies.

In the shallow end.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: mrapollo on January 25, 2017, 01:56:21 PM
"Nice action, very nice action.... that is a very nice action... quality action... I've got one though"

Also, from Ray Woollard: "A famular man..."

Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: holyzombiejesus on January 25, 2017, 04:37:35 PM
The footnote in IP where Alan expresses remorse for his 'kid in a sweetshop' comment when a homeless Glenn Ponder had to move in to a YMCA.

Making Lynne spit her (own) mint out as she didn't deserve one, due to her being disloyal. Lynne is such a brilliant character and the relationship between her and Alan (and Alan's frequent jibes about her mum) is such an intrinsic part of what makes IAP so special.

They do it on purpose, Lynne!
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Daniel on January 25, 2017, 07:13:45 PM
"...and the racist mother of my assistant (don't know name)."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: MoonDust on January 26, 2017, 10:53:51 AM
"Nice action, very nice action.... that is a very nice action... quality action... I've got one though"


Haha! My friend got a Dolce Gusto coffee machine, and when I moved that little lever at the top that goes left to right I said "Nice action."

It really is nice action. Go into an appliances shop and try it.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: mrpupkin on January 26, 2017, 12:03:59 PM
I think they’re worse than scum. I think they’re...I want to say sludge?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: yesitsme on January 26, 2017, 12:08:06 PM
Haha! My friend got a Dolce Gusto coffee machine, and when I moved that little lever at the top that goes left to right I said "Nice action."

It really is nice action. Go into an appliances shop and try it.

'Nice action', 'what if your arm bursts?', 'sub-human scum' and many many more are now in my daily lexicon.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Norton Canes on January 26, 2017, 01:00:35 PM
You people
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Glebe on January 26, 2017, 01:26:46 PM
Quoted it as a fave before, but "In 1967 I misdiagnosed myself with cancer of the ball bag" is possibly the funniest line in I, Partridge.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: mrapollo on January 26, 2017, 01:31:45 PM
The whole interview with Mel Hudson's Hawker in Anglian Lives is brilliant:

"Could be throat cancerrr"

"Fun fun fun fun funny hawker"

"Told you to drop it"

"I'm sure there's some sicko out there who'd put a mini-cam on a hawk and train it to believe that 'knickers is home'"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: MoonDust on January 26, 2017, 01:35:30 PM
'what if your arm bursts?'

I love this line. One of the very few times when I'm on Partridge's side at being bewildered at his guest's comments. Usually he's just ignorant and being a dick, but there I'm like "Yeah, what do you mean 'what if your arm bursts'??"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: batwings on January 26, 2017, 04:36:04 PM
From a KMKYWAP radio show:
"You will not show your veracity on my show!"
"Ladies and Gentlemen, she just showed me her... woman's area!"
"I can't get it out of my head!"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Enzo on January 26, 2017, 05:45:55 PM
Digital Dave had some great bits

Did you had a favourite uncle? "My Uncle Harry. He died last year a virgin"

What's your favourite place in the world? "Gatwick Village" (His facial reaction when answering this is great)
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Captain Z on January 27, 2017, 06:45:33 PM
Just put "nice plums".

Cabbages. Don’t like cabbages at all. Come one. Let’s get through this lot. They’re all rubbish, so take your pick.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: vic spanner on January 28, 2017, 08:28:36 PM
... but he's a deeply ugly man.

Not my words Carol, the words of Top Gear magazine!
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Lemming on January 29, 2017, 02:24:04 AM
"It's got the straps option."

And, from the same scene:
(after swinging the bag at the travel tavern staff) "WATCH IT"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Gulftastic on January 29, 2017, 12:03:21 PM
‘I just want to be able to say “I'm Alan Partridge. Join me tonight when my guests will be, I don't know, Chris Rea”.
Actually, he lives in the area. I could have had him over.
“Alright Chris!”, “Hello Alan I didn't know you'd moved in”
“Yeah, just moved in, last week. I'm having a barbecue, fancy coming over?”
“I'd love to! Do you mind if I bring my guitar?”
“I'd rather you didn't, it's not that kind of area. Do you like Mini Kiev's?”
“I love them! But my wife's vegetarian”
“Doesn't matter. She can have fish”
“No she won't eat that either”
“Oh forget it!. You people”

Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Shay Chaise on January 29, 2017, 12:52:30 PM
That might be my favourite ever bit of Partridge.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: ASFTSN on January 29, 2017, 01:21:33 PM
Like when he recognises his old teacher in Places of My Life (I think) and gets out and confronts him. From the mimes you can tell the teacher wasn't very nice to him.

I love this bit.  Really pretty sad though, no?  The bit of miming which is clearly 'Did it make you feel big to do that to a kid that was only THIS TALL', the fact that the teacher is now confined to a mobility scooter and very clearly at the end of his innings and so utterly not a threat to the man towering over him, Alan's shaken facial expression when he gets back in the car.  I agree Coogan is really good at that sort of thing in later Partridge.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: DrGreggles on January 29, 2017, 01:26:20 PM
This (https://youtu.be/j4Av4xAV600?t=43)
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: ASFTSN on January 29, 2017, 01:27:32 PM
Just put "nice plums".

Cabbages. Don’t like cabbages at all. Come one. Let’s get through this lot. They’re all rubbish, so take your pick.

Indicating a display of prize courgettes

I knew a bloke that had fingers like these.

He's dead now.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: jobotic on January 29, 2017, 07:36:27 PM
‘I just want to be able to say “I'm Alan Partridge. Join me tonight when my guests will be, I don't know, Chris Rea”.
Actually, he lives in the area. I could have had him over.
“Alright Chris!”, “Hello Alan I didn't know you'd moved in”
“Yeah, just moved in, last week. I'm having a barbecue, fancy coming over?”
“I'd love to! Do you mind if I bring my guitar?”
“I'd rather you didn't, it's not that kind of area. Do you like Mini Kiev's?”
“I love them! But my wife's vegetarian”
“Doesn't matter. She can have fish”
“No she won't eat that either”
“Oh forget it!. You people”

Let's go Lynn. These people are starting to annoy me.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: non capisco on January 29, 2017, 09:18:54 PM
I have an annoying and unshakeable tendency to do an impression of Alan singing Kate Bush's line "Oooh, it gets dark!" when it's dusk or when someone turns a light off.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: non capisco on January 29, 2017, 09:20:38 PM
"Is he going to get any petrol?"
"No, he's just using the forecourt to turn around. He thinks he's Rod Stewart."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: non capisco on January 29, 2017, 09:24:02 PM
The meeting with Tony Hayers scene just gets quoted as "Monkey tennis?" and "Smell my cheese, you mother!" when the best bit is him having to think up the concept to 'A Partridge Amongst The Pigeons' on the hoof and saying "Errr....opening sequence...me in Trafalgar Square feeding the pigeons going 'Oh, God!'".
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Shade on January 29, 2017, 10:47:50 PM
"Through the chicaaane. Then all the others. Through the chicaaane. Amazing."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Hangthebuggers on January 30, 2017, 01:16:48 PM
When he mentions missing a night's sleep and hallucinating on his breakfast show and jumping out of the way of a motorbike during traffic and travel.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Captain Z on January 30, 2017, 01:28:54 PM
"I'm a firm friend of Dale Winton - one of the gayest men in Europe"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: MoonDust on January 30, 2017, 02:21:00 PM
Indicating a display of prize courgettes

I knew a bloke that had fingers like these.

He's dead now.

Probably the best bit in that whole vegetable judging scene.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: BritishHobo on January 30, 2017, 03:26:47 PM
When he mentions missing a night's sleep and hallucinating on his breakfast show and jumping out of the way of a motorbike during traffic and travel.

I always have to rewind his too-aggressive traffic jingle from IAP.

YOU COULD GET A BUS THROUGH THERE, YOU *beep*ING C*beep*NT!
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Bacon on January 30, 2017, 06:09:55 PM
I always have to rewind his too-aggressive traffic jingle from IAP.

YOU COULD GET A BUS THROUGH THERE, YOU *beep*ING C*beep*NT!

In a similar vein, the bleak monday morning jingle from MMM, followed by

'cheer up me old mate'
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Dr Funke on January 30, 2017, 06:43:54 PM
Not really a forgotten one but always loved the reveal of the Castrol GTX bomber jacket, and the following conversation with the widow, at Tony Hayers' funeral.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Shay Chaise on January 30, 2017, 08:14:58 PM
Is Partridge pound-for-pound the best comic creation ever?

Sounds like a Partridge-ism, but serious question.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: non capisco on January 31, 2017, 12:07:33 AM
"Fire! Fire! The fair's on fire!.........Not really."

'You're always going on about Benjamin Netanjahu. Give it up, Lynn, you're never going to meet him."

The bit where he's singing along to Hot Chocolate and the chorus takes him by surprise so he comes back with it more forcefully. "Y..YOU DON'T REMEMBER ME DOOOOO YOUUUUU?"

I could be here all night.



Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Twed on January 31, 2017, 03:47:04 AM
Is Partridge pound-for-pound the best comic creation ever?
Yes.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Repeater on January 31, 2017, 08:26:15 AM
Anytime he mentions Ireland or the IRA.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Berthas Fat Leg on January 31, 2017, 10:18:11 AM
"The man was a perfect gentleman. But if you told me 25 years ago that I would be talking about rigid inflatable hulls with Dale Winton I would probably have spat at you."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: ASFTSN on January 31, 2017, 10:23:14 AM
Is Partridge pound-for-pound the best comic creation ever?

Sounds like a Partridge-ism, but serious question.

Now that the two audiobooks and MMM have been added to the canon, I would say it's a yes.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Cuellar on January 31, 2017, 11:49:26 AM
"I mean, even the NOISE he made sounded like a siren"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Norton Canes on January 31, 2017, 11:59:16 AM
Why do birds
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Glebe on January 31, 2017, 12:59:34 PM
"The nettles were particularly virulent..." (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BSrUN9_3I8A#t=2m18s)
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: yesitsme on January 31, 2017, 01:07:38 PM
Tell you what I like about Partridge World, all the ancilary characters are so realistic.  Alice, who just likes to go on barge holidays on her own like a wierdo, the band who play 'Close to You' in too high a key or the bloke who's selling the five bedroom bastard house all seem like real people plonked in a TV show.

Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Uncle TechTip on January 31, 2017, 01:09:08 PM
"Fire! Fire! The fair's on fire!.........Not really."


Is this the PA at the county show? I love when he goes off script. "I don't know if you're familiar with BBC commissioning policy..."

The panic that ensues when the keyboard won't stop playing at the afternoon with Sue Cook.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Cuellar on January 31, 2017, 02:47:57 PM
Been revisiting MMM thanks to this thread, and this little corpse by Tim Key is nice:

http://dai.ly/x5a6a08?start=456
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: nec1974 on January 31, 2017, 03:08:19 PM
'You shot Telly Savalas?'
'Put a Conrad Knight sock in it'
'On that double vehicular loss...for Alan Partridge'

All the Las Vegas KMKY radio episode is glorious. One radio outing that is oft-forgotten is Knowing Knowing Me Knowing You, the fly-on-the-wall documentary.

'Up, up, up, down, down, down, jiggy, jiggy, jiggy, around and around'.

Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Cuellar on January 31, 2017, 05:12:36 PM
'You shot Telly Savalas?'
'Put a Conrad Knight sock in it'
'On that double vehicular loss...for Alan Partridge'

All the Las Vegas KMKY radio episode is glorious. One radio outing that is oft-forgotten is Knowing Knowing Me Knowing You, the fly-on-the-wall documentary.

'Up, up, up, down, down, down, jiggy, jiggy, jiggy, around and around'.

Yes, I love the 'Conrad Knight socks' bit. To this day I still have to stop myself blurting out 'Conrad Knight Socks' in the middle of other peoples' sentences after taking socks out of the washing machine.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Glebe on January 31, 2017, 06:17:24 PM
Been revisiting MMM thanks to this thread, and this little corpse by Tim Key is nice:

http://dai.ly/x5a6a08?start=456

Also here (http://dai.ly/x5a24op?start=864).

"I've got a sad Arab on line three."

"If you put fennel in there, we're gonna fall out."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: hard rocx and mettals on January 31, 2017, 07:04:35 PM
"Ladies and gentlemen, two dogs."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Paul Calf on January 31, 2017, 10:40:28 PM
Is this the PA at the county show? I love when he goes off script. "I don't know if you're familiar with BBC commissioning policy..."

The panic that ensues when the keyboard won't stop playing at the afternoon with Sue Cook.

"Ghost in the machine. Probably a metaphor for...er...anyway!"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: non capisco on January 31, 2017, 11:28:47 PM
Talking of ghosts in the machine...

'That was The Police with 'De Do Do Do, De Da Da Da', their gibberish classic....'
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Robert on January 31, 2017, 11:34:29 PM
I say telescopic dampers, I mean rigid stays.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Shoulders?-Stomach! on January 31, 2017, 11:59:09 PM
I say telescopic dampers, I mean rigid stays.

Yikes.

Was just about to post that.

Can't be that forgotten. We suck.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: MoonDust on February 01, 2017, 08:21:48 AM
Also here (http://dai.ly/x5a24op?start=864).

"I've got a sad Arab on line three."

"If you put fennel in there, we're gonna fall out."

That and Cuellar's link has the video and audio painfully out of sync. Bit annoying as I wanted to rewatch series 2.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Hangthebuggers on February 01, 2017, 09:11:12 AM
'Oh Alan, where's your sense of humour?'

'I don't have one'

In his discussion with the wonderfully terrifying Mary.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Cuellar on February 01, 2017, 09:27:23 AM
That and Cuellar's link has the video and audio painfully out of sync. Bit annoying as I wanted to rewatch series 2.

Oh really? Not for me, neither of them.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: MoonDust on February 01, 2017, 10:48:27 AM
Oh really? Not for me, neither of them.

Well that's a shiter.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Glebe on February 01, 2017, 10:55:06 AM
Well that's a shiter.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mjx2pclJQew#t=49s
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: MoonDust on February 01, 2017, 11:07:07 AM
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mjx2pclJQew#t=49s

One of the best deliveries in that whole Attitudes Night sketch. Perfect.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Gurke and Hare on February 01, 2017, 12:37:04 PM
"That could have been spectacular. We could have had a horse jump, now we’ve got a lump of dung."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Captain Z on February 01, 2017, 12:43:08 PM
You can stop giggling before I take down your particulars!
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Hangthebuggers on February 01, 2017, 02:51:14 PM
'There's a spoon in the bathroom, but I've no cause to use it'

-

Alan: Lynn, say I didn't have a panic attack!

Lynn: You didn't have a panic attack.

Alan: I know!

-

Stop going on about Benjamin Netenuahu Lynn, you're never going to meet him!

-

And then I fly off to Cornwall and I just smash in the sea in a big ball of flames.

-

Fire fire, the fair's on fire....not even listening.

Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: shiftwork2 on February 01, 2017, 05:56:26 PM
My favourite ever two seconds of Partridge was SHITTY ZOMBIES (https://youtu.be/yGOvW9Jn0tE?t=6s) in the amusement arcade.  A pearl in the mud of IAP2.  Always something joyous about Alan with his guard down, enjoying himself.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Shade on February 01, 2017, 05:57:20 PM
"Ladies and gentlemen, two dogs."

"These Greyhounds or Whippets, or whatever they are."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: non capisco on February 01, 2017, 07:20:05 PM
"Tonight's show is coming live from BBC Television Centre where we've built an exact replica reproduction of the interior of my house. Please, don't take that as a green light to go to Norwich and burgle my actual house... it has happened during my television series six times... because sitting at my home right now are two men from Securicor, Mike and Ted with their two alsatians, Tin Tin and Pickles. So if anyone out there is thinking of burgling me then don't bother. No, in fact, do. Have a go! Because quite frankly you'll be picking up your teeth with a broken arm. So just think about that before you trespass on my property because you people are scum."

The detail that his house was burgled on a weekly basis during every episode of KMKYWAP. 'Tin Tin and Pickles'.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Glebe on February 02, 2017, 11:32:12 AM
"I've got access to the kids but they don't wanna see me!"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: marquis_de_sad on February 02, 2017, 02:08:05 PM
"I think that it's unhelpful when you're trying to build a new America, in the early 60s, to have sex with Marilyn Monroe. It's not helpful."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: QDRPHNC on February 02, 2017, 03:01:26 PM
The bit in MMM when he's smelling wine and almost gives himself a panic attack. Can't remember the exact line (at work), but something like, "Oh Jesus, not here."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Nice Relaxing Poo on February 02, 2017, 05:17:30 PM
The look on his face as the gangster threatens him

(http://i.imgur.com/CvWJyAe.png)
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Hangthebuggers on February 02, 2017, 05:30:20 PM
The look on his face as the gangster threatens him

(http://i.imgur.com/CvWJyAe.png)

Similar face to when Lynn's ex-fuzz, baptist pal threatens to knock his block off. Thankfully he gets 'Bleachy head' and Michael to guard him.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Gulftastic on February 02, 2017, 05:34:25 PM
'Dear oh dear oh dear. That is extraordinary. I mean, to look at you, you’d think you’d sing like an angel, but in actual fact you sound like a trapped boy.'
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Chriddof on February 02, 2017, 08:43:40 PM
One of the best deliveries in that whole Attitudes Night sketch. Perfect.

And it's where my avatar comes from. If I had a bit of custom text underneath it, it would read "Inadequacy, and gloom".

For me the whole of the narration from the delay at the racing on TDT is incredible. The "dunno what that is" bit's been mentioned, I think, but also "let's hope that tomfoolery doesn't escalate into blind... ugly violence", referring to a horse as being "well-known for its sense of humour - look at that wiggle! Marvellous", "a lovely girl there, chomping on a sandwich!... (weird untranscribable happy sighing noise)", and of course the faux-pas revolving around a bit of horse-shaped tarpaulin and a Volvo.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: HappyTree on February 02, 2017, 11:26:47 PM
Charlotte Rampling, catch.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: manticore on February 03, 2017, 12:21:55 AM
I went to the recording of one of the KMKY radio shows and was very impressed that all the characters dressed up and the stage was done up like a proper chat show. Coogan remained in character all the time and looked miffed in a pefectly Partridge way when Iannucci announced that he had got a line wrong and a scene had to be redone.

The one with the hypnotherapist and child prodigy is a work of art.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Twed on February 03, 2017, 05:52:16 AM
After talking to Julian Barratt as "Blackbird" the folk singer about the troubling distractions of modern life like iPhones, Alan saying proudly:

"You know, when I get home tonight I'm going to throw away my kettle."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Mobius on February 03, 2017, 07:30:30 AM
"Rayne Wooney. Top one!"

"Spiffing! oh..uhh.. WAGWAN!"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: axel on February 04, 2017, 12:25:44 AM
Seve Ballesteros, the bullfighter, thats what I call him.... technically he's a professional golfer. A friend of mine said recently "what do you get if you cross a ballerina and a bastard?" Ballesteros was his answer. I guess if you analyze it that Seve combines the qualities of both those animals, he has the lithe sophistication and nimbleness of a ballerina combined with the hard nosed, ruthless thuggery of a bastard.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: batwings on February 04, 2017, 09:41:52 AM
"...caused outrage recently when he told feminist, Andrea Dworkin, to 'shut up and shave'."

Lord Morgan: "What a man chooses to do in the privacy of his own attic, is his business alone."

Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Twed on February 06, 2017, 02:14:32 AM
On swimming styles:

Quote
If I’m in a good mood, I’ll do breaststroke, imagining the water as the face of my late mother. If I’m in a bad mood, angry, or if I’ve let myself down at a social function, it’ll be butterfly

I love the way he drops "let myself down at a social function", something that must have happened regularly enough that he's come to terms with talking about it openly, as people tend to do when they're trying to address an addiction, mental illness or personality issue.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: yesitsme on February 06, 2017, 08:56:45 AM
"...caused outrage recently when he told feminist, Andrea Dworkin, to 'shut up and shave'."

Lord Morgan: "What a man chooses to do in the privacy of his own attic, is his business alone."

I believe we're meant to dislike Patrick Marber for some reason but I think he's a pretty good performer and that Lord Morgan sketch has to be one of the funniest things you'll ever hear and it's basically just him going 'You're an arse'.

I love the wey he says something like "Last week in the House of Lords I stood up, said 'You're all arses - goodbye'"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: marquis_de_sad on February 06, 2017, 09:06:34 AM
Marber is very good, I think. I love the varieties of "sorry" after he'd lost the news.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Cuellar on February 06, 2017, 05:22:42 PM
"Roy, from Caistor St Edmund. Roy...would you eat men?" (https://youtu.be/U5KH-vxNc6g?t=2m8s)
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: dallasman on February 06, 2017, 05:43:14 PM
"I ordered us both some food and wine. A nice German wine, some Italian food, and UK water."

It's so much in the reading, though. I just re-listened to that chapter ("Me vs Hayers"), and Coogan's delivery just makes it wall-to-wall quotables.

The setup for the meeting is great too:

"I knew for a fact that this establishment served modern European, whereas I'd hoped we could meet at TGI Friday, because I wanted something with chips. So I politely declined, then reconsidered and called back very quickly to accept"

"...the kind of genuinely great wisdom you only find in men with side-parted hair"

The little postscript to Monkey Tennis - "quickly and humanely destroyed" - is beautiful. Might've been quoted already.

Ah, yeah, the whole book, really.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Twed on February 06, 2017, 11:19:28 PM
"Roy, from Caistor St Edmund. Roy...would you eat men?" (https://youtu.be/U5KH-vxNc6g?t=2m8s)
That entire bit is masterful, especially when he clarifies that he thought "cannibalism among people of similar stature" was implicit.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Lemming on February 06, 2017, 11:32:55 PM
Haven't checked to see if it's been mentioned yet, but the first part of I, Partridge that properly made me cry laughing was the recollection of his 9th birthday and his father's cake-related injury. Every single line from that makes a good quote.

"I didn't know what to say, my mind blasted by the twin concerns of spilt cake and parental cruelty. He turned to go and put one of his angry feet on the remains of the cake. This acted as a lubricant, destroying any traction-slash-friction his foot might have had with the floor. It short forward, and with his balance now a distant memory, he came crashing to the floor! His back took the first hit, smashing against the lino and cake with a bang - BANG! - his rump was next - DOOF! - followed by his skull - CRACK! And for a second, he was motionless, before blood began to spill from the back of his head. As my father lay on the ground, the tension, much like the physical integrity of dad's skull, was broken."

As usual, Coogan's delivery in the audiobook makes it the funniest thing ever. The excitement of describing the loss of balance, the absolute giddiness in his voice as he recounts the clearly exaggerated fall, and the pure satisfaction he puts into the word "CRACK".

Also, relating to his tales of childhood trauma - "My parents are dead now and my mum's sister Valerie - who disputes my version of events pretty vociferously - has gone medically demented, so I'm really the gospel here."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Cuellar on February 07, 2017, 09:39:12 AM
I can't stop finding little bits that tickle me. The delivery of "Each day is 10 hours long, becaaause...they've gone metric on time" has been stuck in my head for weeks

https://youtu.be/kKf1R1gmsKY?t=6m36s
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: pish on February 07, 2017, 10:39:47 AM
I always enjoyed these *R@RE* Coogan vignettes* with some memorable lines that I still remember**. Technically off-topic since it's not strictly Alan Partridge, but you'd hardly notice.

(*if you don't know what a vignette is you're either hot, busy, Greek or Turkish.)
(**I'm too tired to remember them now, but I do remember them.)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5Ie3wtmS-hg
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yg6TSVbjmv4
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rVKle4kB-5Y

(and so on and such and such..)
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Panbaams on February 07, 2017, 11:05:22 AM
"Simon Bates is a big fan, and he's certainly got his finger on the nub of youth."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: MoonDust on February 07, 2017, 11:07:50 AM
Partridge on KMKY speaking to the hypnotist/magician, trying to understand what he means by "channeling the energy" that's in all of us. Paraphrasing as I can't remember exactly, Alan's saying "so if I harness the energy around us then I can channel it into a sort of.... tube... which funnels up.... and out of my head.... like a........ I'm sorry, I've no idea what I'm talking about."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: grainger on February 07, 2017, 01:06:10 PM
the bloke who's selling the five bedroom bastard house

Which reminds me (paraphrasing):

Alan: Is it on a bus route?
Estate agent: No, I'm afraid you'd need a car.
Alan: Good.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: MoonDust on February 07, 2017, 01:07:20 PM
Which reminds me (paraphrasing):

Alan: Is it on a bus route?
Estate agent: No.
Alan: Good.

This must be on a deleted scene? I don't remember this bit at all, and I've seen that episode countless times.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: grainger on February 07, 2017, 01:15:00 PM
I think it is, as I looked up the script before I posted, and it wasn't there. I have watched the deleted scenes nearly as often as the episodes, so I can never remember which bits made the cut and which didn't.

Actually, come to think of it, I think the estate agent says "I'm afraid you'd have to drive", rather than "no". I'll go back and fix that.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: MoonDust on February 07, 2017, 02:23:15 PM
Alan to the estate agent: "what's this? It's a cast-iron egg tree, lacquered. Is that included? I mean, it's not a deal-breaker but I would like to know."

Also:

Alan: What's this little sink thing?

Estate agent: Er, it's a rinser.

Alan: Yeah. Get rid of it.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Daniel on February 07, 2017, 06:50:08 PM
Haven't checked to see if it's been mentioned yet, but the first part of I, Partridge that properly made me cry laughing was the recollection of his 9th birthday and his father's cake-related injury. Every single line from that makes a good quote.

"I didn't know what to say, my mind blasted by the twin concerns of spilt cake and parental cruelty. He turned to go and put one of his angry feet on the remains of the cake. This acted as a lubricant, destroying any traction-slash-friction his foot might have had with the floor. It short forward, and with his balance now a distant memory, he came crashing to the floor! His back took the first hit, smashing against the lino and cake with a bang - BANG! - his rump was next - DOOF! - followed by his skull - CRACK! And for a second, he was motionless, before blood began to spill from the back of his head. As my father lay on the ground, the tension, much like the physical integrity of dad's skull, was broken."

As usual, Coogan's delivery in the audiobook makes it the funniest thing ever. The excitement of describing the loss of balance, the absolute giddiness in his voice as he recounts the clearly exaggerated fall, and the pure satisfaction he puts into the word "CRACK".

Also, relating to his tales of childhood trauma - "My parents are dead now and my mum's sister Valerie - who disputes my version of events pretty vociferously - has gone medically demented, so I'm really the gospel here."

I think this is also the section where he follows up one of his many "his eyes seemed to say" non-quotes with "This was typical of my dad - or would have been, if he'd said it".
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Glebe on February 12, 2017, 11:35:49 AM
Just watching some clips on YouTube... it's certainly not 'oft-forgotten', but Alan's interview with boxing promotor Terry Norton is an absolute highlight for me. Alan Ford is just fantastic... I love when he gets really angry, it's genuinely scary... "ammonia on the boat..."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Captain Z on February 12, 2017, 04:17:06 PM
Finally, with the handshake over, I got into my car, made sure it was in neutral, turned the engine on, found the biting point, checked my mirrors, indicated to pull out, released the handbrake and drove away. I had also put my seatbelt on.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: gmoney on February 12, 2017, 04:39:15 PM
Don't laugh Lynn, you've broken your neck!
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Repeater on February 12, 2017, 05:20:32 PM
So he forgot to put the car into gear?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Phil_A on February 12, 2017, 07:28:55 PM
Graham was too cool for school(although he did still attend). He'd not only been the winner of the sports day slow bicycle race for three straight years, he was also the first boy in our class to properly kiss a girl. There'd been cheek pecks before, not to mention inter-sex handshakes, but he was the first kid in the playground to 'go French'. None of the rest of us could figure out where he'd learnt to do this, but the general consensus was 'from Porno films.'

Eight year old Jennie Lancashire was the cock-a-hoop recipient, and she was rightly grateful. But when I look back I often think how fortunate it was Graham was the same age as her, because if he'd been 20 years older he would've been up in Crown Court. And quite right too!

I bumped into him for the first time in decades the other week. It was at the returns desk in my local Homebase. We were both taking back kettles(him - faulty filament; me - didn't like colour).

'Still French-kissing eight-year-olds?' I said, pointing an accusing finger at his potentially paedophilic mouth.
'No,' he replied.
'Good,' I said. Then for extra emphasis I said it again, but slightly more slowly. 'Gooood.'
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Bobloblawslawbomb on February 12, 2017, 07:52:56 PM
....the man the Virginia Bottomley called, 'that little turd', please welcome, Lawrence Knowles!
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Lost Oliver on February 15, 2017, 01:46:37 PM
"I take off, wheeling around the car park like a spooked horse on its period (what a horrible image)."

Nomad.

Made me wee myself. Just the fact he's come up with that image in his own head and is mortified by it, even though he knew he was going to say it.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: MoonDust on February 15, 2017, 02:16:32 PM
Lynn putting Alan in a choking grip. Took me a few watches to remember that bit as a brilliant moment.

So brilliant. Lynn being the last person you'd expect to use violence upon a would-be assailant. Brings up a few questions; does she go to self-defence classes? Did Gordon the ex-copper teach her some moves?

Actually, that last question has only just dawned on me as the obvious answer. It's in the episode where she mentions Gordon and has been seeing him for a while, then suddenly she pulls a choke hold on Alan. Coincidence? I think not.

Never realised that before.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Twed on February 15, 2017, 02:19:44 PM
Maybe? I imagine that she's just the kind of person who goes to those self-defense classes.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Hangthebuggers on February 16, 2017, 02:46:02 PM
“At many of the pivotal points in my life I've found that the best way to reach a decision is to find out what a Baptist would do, then do the opposite."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Bazooka on February 16, 2017, 03:02:33 PM
When Sonja attacks Alan with the rubber hammer in series 2, his plight always gives me a chuckle.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Paul Calf on February 16, 2017, 03:06:29 PM
"He's a lovely man, Roger Moore. But he is a towel thief."

Oft-forgotten because of the slashing edits made to the US (and iTunes) versions of KMKYWAP.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: phantom_power on February 16, 2017, 03:37:42 PM
I listen to the two audiobooks when I go to sleep, playing random chapters. It is great because I enjoy them as i listen but am half-asleep and so have pretty much forgotten them by the time they come round again another night. For me they are cover-to-cover perfection.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: nec1974 on February 16, 2017, 03:56:58 PM
"He's a lovely man, Roger Moore. But he is a towel thief."

Oft-forgotten because of the slashing edits made to the US (and iTunes) versions of KMKYWAP.

There's a whole bit about the difference in use of savoir and connaître that's missing in the version I have of the interview with Michel Lambert.



Massive internal injuries.
Organ malfunctions.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Kane Jones on February 16, 2017, 04:00:10 PM
When Sonja attacks Alan with the rubber hammer in series 2, his plight always gives me a chuckle.

Yes, his 'NO, PLEASE NO!" always makes me laugh.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Mobius on February 17, 2017, 12:42:17 AM
Rewatched Series 2 of MMM and then Scissored Isle last night. Just absolutely rammed with hilarious moments.

"Carls won us the war. Carls. Carls. Ca-arls"

His dog only eating boiled eggs. And later massacring a sheep off camera "SHIT HE'S GOT ONE! YOU'LL HAVE TO LET HIM EAT IT"

After 'sheep-gate' and the MMM meltdown "I vowed never to make the same mistake again. And yet, in an incident that beggars belief, I made a similar mistake the following night."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Genevieve on February 17, 2017, 04:37:48 PM
Just watched the Paris edition of KMKYWAP and thought I recognised the accordionist as the same accordionist (Yves Guérin) from Eric Rohmer's Conte d'été who has to transpose Melvil Poupaud's Breton shanty, always with a wry smile.  It does seem unlikely that they couldn't find an accordion player in Britain though, can anyone confirm?  Maybe it's just a standard look for an accordionist.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: thraxx on February 18, 2017, 09:04:11 PM

Alan's barely controlled squirming as Hot Pants come prancing out and then over to him in th jacuzzi on KMKY episode 3
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Cuellar on February 18, 2017, 09:16:11 PM
When he dictates the message to 'sack Lynn for being disloyal' which seques into 'can you call Bill Oddie..' he stops the tape player with 'That's something else', which is also what he says when his 'Partridge on Partridge' interview in MMM ends with 'and tell Chegwin I'll pay for the dry cleaning'.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Captain Z on February 19, 2017, 09:10:36 AM
You're a really busty woman, Jem. One of the bustiest on campus. You've got quite a long torso but your legs aren't the least bit thick. Believe me, if I didn't have lectures I'd love to kiss your back from top to bottom and from side to side, also diagonally.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: DrGreggles on February 19, 2017, 03:10:58 PM
When discussing Fred West:

"That guy. What a dilbert!"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: HappyTree on February 20, 2017, 01:11:55 AM
Maybe it's just a standard look for an accordionist.
It is!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G9Y5Dhzciyc
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BWKx3_Ehkak
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kCj-igF6Ltw

I watched La Chance aux Chansons for many years. Once you break through the gay kitsch barrier it becomes quite meditative.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Tombola on February 25, 2017, 01:03:02 PM
Tonight we're talking about death!
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: ColinBradshaw on February 26, 2017, 12:50:21 AM
Cheeky Monkey. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ftL-IkMBlZM
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Glebe on February 26, 2017, 02:18:26 AM
From Welcome to the Places of My Life: "The more I learn about Hitler, the more I dislike him. He was mad!"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: notjosh on February 26, 2017, 10:29:27 AM
I've just become aware of his guest stint on TFI Friday (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IBfFYlYIPVA). Did anyone see it? Worth seeking out the whole thing?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: DrGreggles on February 26, 2017, 02:47:14 PM
"Say what you like about Billie Piper, but she's certainly one of the most popular prostitutes on ITV."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Repeater on February 27, 2017, 08:39:23 AM
From Welcome to the Places of My Life: "The more I learn about Hitler, the more I dislike him. He was mad!"

Och that's no a good line. Partridge himself has made this joke a few times & it's become a heavy duty duffcunt cliche.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: DrGreggles on February 27, 2017, 09:56:01 AM
Particularly when the "He'd be like Hitler or one of them mad fellows" was used far better in 'Father Ted'.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: yesitsme on February 27, 2017, 10:49:43 AM
The dawn of his swimming war with err Dawn.  The whole 'whoosh' and 'splash' description of him cutting through the water until the end of the lane where TUMBLETURN 'I attempt a tumbleturn'.  The rest of that bit where he's describing almost choking and getting water up his nose in an elegant and triumphant manner - pure Alan.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Hugh Jass on March 01, 2017, 03:58:36 AM
"Is Dan your friend?"
"Yes, I'm convinced... he is my Best Friend."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: yesitsme on March 01, 2017, 07:59:06 AM
I don't think anyone has told us what they think of the pedestrianisation of Norwich City Centre.

Personally I'm against it.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: ASFTSN on March 01, 2017, 08:08:48 AM

(http://i.imgur.com/NpCveB3.jpg)


I rewatched all of these on Netflix on these last week.  Was I out of the room or is this bit not in some versions, 'coz I have no memory of it...
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Berthas Fat Leg on March 01, 2017, 08:37:02 AM
Traders need accESS TO DIXons
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Cuellar on March 01, 2017, 09:10:52 AM
Just cos I like dipping into this thread I'm going to keep it alive a bit longer.

After the breakup with Angela:

"PLEASE...PLEASE though...PLEASE...PLEASE THOUGH" - coupled with what looks like a genuine giggle from Tim Key.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Glebe on March 01, 2017, 10:18:28 AM
"PLEASE...PLEASE though...PLEASE...PLEASE THOUGH" - coupled with what looks like a genuine giggle from Tim Key.

Haha, yeah, I was actually thinking of that this morning (having watched MMM through again the other day).
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: greenman on March 01, 2017, 10:55:49 AM
Och that's no a good line. Partridge himself has made this joke a few times & it's become a heavy duty duffcunt cliche.

I did like the uncomfortable scene on the balcony though.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Twed on March 01, 2017, 02:06:21 PM
Just cos I like dipping into this thread I'm going to keep it alive a bit longer.

After the breakup with Angela:

"PLEASE...PLEASE though...PLEASE...PLEASE THOUGH" - coupled with what looks like a genuine giggle from Tim Key.
Haha, yes. It's that kind of stuff that makes me almost dangerously fond of the character. He's welcome to come to Christmas dinner.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: MoonDust on March 01, 2017, 05:38:54 PM
I rewatched all of these on Netflix on these last week.  Was I out of the room or is this bit not in some versions, 'coz I have no memory of it...

Ooo I don't know. I've not seen it on Netflix, I watched it on DVD.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: McChesney Duntz on March 25, 2017, 07:30:36 AM
Not EXACTLY the right thread for this, but no Partridge-head should miss it.  Can't figure out WHY this was written, but an impressive piece of work regardless:

https://sports.vice.com/en_uk/article/a-worryingly-deep-dive-into-alan-partridges-enduring-love-affair-with-formula-1
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Twed on March 25, 2017, 12:47:48 PM
Quote
Yes, Partridge is the stereotypical F1 follower: a middle-aged middle-Englander for whom Jeremy Clarkson fulfils the dual role of style icon and moral compass. He's au fait with mobile phones and casually orders a latte, but he also emitted an audible sigh of triumph when voting Leave and prefers a Wetherspoon's because it feels like pubs used to, before the needless introduction of craft beers and women.
Somebody hates their dad.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: the on March 25, 2017, 01:05:28 PM
[Alain Perdrix]

I rewatched all of these on Netflix on these last week.  Was I out of the room or is this bit not in some versions, 'coz I have no memory of it...

Yep, that wasn't in the originally-broadcast versions.

The original broadcasts were 30 minute versions, whereas the ones on DVD (and possibly VHS) were 35 minutes. Alain Perdrix was one of the bits that had been snipped.

Perhaps not the place to talk about this, but I watched The Tony Ferrino Phenomenon online recently, and it must have been a longer home video version. There were 3 extra songs (none of which really had a joke in them), and the ending song didn't have the picture captions on it, making it less funny.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: MattD on March 27, 2017, 08:38:07 PM
Talk of Partridge in the other thread got me thinking about this quite unsettling scene involving the 'cup of beans', and in case I've missed it, then I can't believe it hasn't been mentioned already! Likewise with Lynn (as discussed in the 'out of character' thread), I think there's more of a troubling side to Michael.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HQ7EPVQXUM8

Everything about it is very awkward (Michael's peculiar and secretive attitude) and preposterous (Alan eating a cup of beans on a doorstep), making it the most surreal scene ever from the Partridge canon. It's downright weird and intriguing.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Twed on March 27, 2017, 08:52:18 PM
Oh, I always thought it made sense. It's (from Michael's POV) that thing where you have an uninvited guest and you're not finding it convenient to entertain them because you have other stuff going on. In this case it probably involves other visitors or residents that he knows aren't compatible with Alan's worldview. He likes Alan best in the petrol station where the setting is controlled, and neutral.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Gulftastic on March 27, 2017, 09:00:48 PM
I read a theory about heroin due to him having a spoon.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: checkoutgirl on March 27, 2017, 09:08:48 PM
Oh, I always thought it made sense.

It makes sense but there's something very unsettling about Greenall's performance. He's agitated and distracted. The cup of beans is just the topper. I've never heard of anyone ever having a cup of beans in real life. I like how Alan avails of the free food when 99% of people wouldn't. Also the chunky bloke walking out the door wordlessly. It's just one odd thing after another stacking up, it's an amazing scene.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Utter Shit on March 27, 2017, 09:25:28 PM
I don't know what's happening behind the door, but there's no doubt that there's a huge amount of depth to Michael's character that you're only given glimpses of. Some obvious, like his quiet breakdown behind the bins that Alan witnesses from the window in his hotel room, others less so - one of my favourite lines in the entire Partridge canon comes after Alan demands Michael protect him from angry schoolteacher Phil Wiley..."I can't hit anyone, I've been told". So much back story from seven words.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Twed on March 27, 2017, 09:51:26 PM
It makes sense but there's something very unsettling about Greenall's performance. He's agitated and distracted.
That's one of the things that makes it make sense, to me. He would prefer Alan to not be there at all. He's stressed-out by his presence. Now is not a good time for Alan.

The cup of beans is just the topper. I've never heard of anyone ever having a cup of beans in real life.
Well, that's why it's so funny. This is clearly an insight into Michael's life and some time where he and his friends had a "thing" in their life of making a cup of beans, due to larks or poverty or whatever. It has become normalised to him so much that it's as natural as offering a cup of tea or cheese on toast. It's unique to him and his thinking that Alan would understand such an offer at all is hilarious.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: MattD on March 27, 2017, 09:53:18 PM
I don't know what's happening behind the door, but there's no doubt that there's a huge amount of depth to Michael's character that you're only given glimpses of. Some obvious, like his quiet breakdown behind the bins that Alan witnesses from the window in his hotel room, others less so - one of my favourite lines in the entire Partridge canon comes after Alan demands Michael protect him from angry schoolteacher Phil Wiley..."I can't hit anyone, I've been told". So much back story from seven words.

Also to add to Michael's dark tendencies, remember the violent fantasy involving his 'mate' Tom Donaldson.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Hugh Jass on March 27, 2017, 11:32:24 PM
I think I recall reading on here that on one of the commentaries Iannucci mentions that Micheal lives in that house with something like 8 other men. If he did say that, I love that addition to the scene.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: yesitsme on March 28, 2017, 08:29:14 AM
What's in Alan's drawer?
What's behind Michael's door?

We may never know.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Alan Sex on July 08, 2017, 10:09:59 PM
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m4T_4uLQ7e0#t=49s

The audience laughs at "The guy obviously had talent," missing the "that's the tragedy" bit. This displeases me.

Awful. I'm Alan Partridge is riddled with that obnoxious laff track drowning out great dialogue. There's loads unintelligible in the spiiike scene too.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Alan Sex on July 08, 2017, 10:10:59 PM
What's in Alan's drawer?
We may never know.

https://mrmichaelcook.wordpress.com/2010/07/13/revealed-at-last-inside-alan-partridge%E2%80%99s-hotel-drawer/
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: BritishHobo on July 08, 2017, 10:22:24 PM
I think I recall reading on here that on one of the commentaries Iannucci mentions that Micheal lives in that house with something like 8 other men. If he did say that, I love that addition to the scene.

They also say that they like the idea that Michael was only really in the army for a very brief time, possibly as little as a couple of weeks, before having to leave, and that he's driven partly by the fact that he wishes he had been able to actually properly serve.

I think later they even say they like the idea he simply was never in the army at all.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: marquis_de_sad on July 09, 2017, 02:46:16 PM
Awful. I'm Alan Partridge is riddled with that obnoxious laff track drowning out great dialogue. There's loads unintelligible in the spiiike scene too.

It's not a laugh track.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on July 09, 2017, 08:55:57 PM
Is Partridge pound-for-pound the best comic creation ever?

Sounds like a Partridge-ism, but serious question.
I've been a lurker for a while but can't go by without agreeing with this. Growing up as a little Mork & Mindy fan and then discovering the Young Ones, follower by Blackadder and Python I assumed I'd seen the best there could be but Partridge is, for me, a complete character. Which is why I get annoyed when it doesn't quite work (Scissored Isle). His best bits are stellar and it must be so hard to keep writing at that level of quality for so long.

An obvious one is the whole "Lynn I've just pierced my foot on a spike" scene which I can watch on repeat. Just the greatest thing ever.

I also love
"Don't put your foot on my bench."
"I wasn't. I was just doing a cockney walk"

The ongoing sniggering by Kevin Eldon

The range of band names for Glen Ponder and... Chalet, Debonair, Ferrari, Bangkok, Savoir Faire, Lazarus.

"Oh, what the heck, rock and roll! Let’s all have a pear!"

"Chris De Burgh, Mike Oldfield, Jean Michel Jarre and The Eagles could eat you lot for breakfast."

"Now we’ve had several calls during the last few hours, about a humorous comment I made some time ago. Just to reassure you, the Queen is not dead. It was a humorous intro into a song which seems to have been taken a bit too literally by one or two listeners, and a newspaper. So just to repeat, Queen Elizabeth II is not dead. Unless she went in the night and is yet to be discovered by the maid."

“Well it’s bank holiday, which traditionally would have meant you’d be in a car on your way to the seaside with a Li-Lo, a dog full of sand, some hardboiled Werther’s Originals, or whatever. But these days, unfortunately, it’s more likely to mean a child watching a violent computer game and pornography while shouting “I hate you!” to his parents who are downstairs having a cocaine and ecstasy-fuelled orgy. That’s Britain in 2011, you’re welcome to it!”

"It flushed on the first yank!"

And ones already mentioned:
Joe Beesley & Cheeky Monkey

"He's had more hot dinners than I've had hot dinners"

Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: MuteBanana on July 09, 2017, 09:51:49 PM
It's a disgrace KMKYWAP often gets forgotten by Partridge fans. It's a great show.

I've not read the thread.

Are you a porn legend, Glen?
Well my boyfriend thinks so.

You wanna get sucked in? I'll get you sucked in. I'll get you sucked in so fast you'll fly out the other end.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: batwings on July 09, 2017, 09:58:27 PM
It's a disgrace KMKYWAP often gets forgotten by Partridge fans. It's a great show.

I've not read the thread.

Are you a porn legend, Glen?
Well my boyfriend thinks so.

You wanna get sucked in? I'll get you sucked in. I'll get you sucked in so fast you'll fly out the other end.

Ammonia on the boat.

Took me years to realise that's rhyming slang rather than an actual boat.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: buttgammon on July 09, 2017, 10:04:28 PM
I've been lucky enough to meet Steve Coogan and Simon Greenall in the last year, and I've wanted to shout so many things from this thread on both occasions...it really is a rich canon.

I find myself saying "you're laughing at weather" all the time when people laugh at mundane things, and had a particularly strong urge to repeat that one to Coogan.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on July 09, 2017, 11:15:57 PM
When hypnotised and thinking he's in a car with Ursula Andress

"If I get caught in flagrante whilst violating the Highway Code, my wife will find out, I’ll get three points on my license, my insurance premium could go up by thirty percent. That’s not going to happen. Now put your top on and get out. Go, go. Get out."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Gwen Taylor on ITV on July 09, 2017, 11:18:37 PM
Ammonia on the boat.

Took me years to realise that's rhyming slang rather than an actual boat.

Coat?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: samadriel on July 10, 2017, 06:52:37 AM
Boat race = face
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Autopsy Turvey on July 10, 2017, 11:41:36 AM
"Whenever I feel like hitting someone, I simply imagine that person to be a saint, or some holy figure. Someone who'd given his life, or someone who... someone who doesn't deserve to be hit. I imagine that he was a victim, a pauper, working in a workhouse in the eighteenth century. This sounds bizarre - this might sound bizarre, but that's how I stop hitting people."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on July 11, 2017, 11:35:48 PM
He wouldn't have suffered, I shot him straight through the heart.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Autopsy Turvey on July 12, 2017, 12:27:27 AM
"You can't drop Bill Pickley! I've written a link for him: 'If you're feeling sickly or a little bit tickly, here's the remedy, it's Bill Pickley'."

The researcher explaining the content of Steve Thompson's late-night impression of Alan Partridge at the Comedy Shop - "He just said 'Oh er, my chickens have hatched, and the bolted stablers... and er, I'm Alan Partridge', lots of times..." - followed by Alan's delighted laughter and cry of "Cheeky blighter!"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: QDRPHNC on July 12, 2017, 05:19:07 PM
"You can't drop Bill Pickley! I've written a link for him: 'If you're feeling sickly or a little bit tickly, here's the remedy, it's Bill Pickley'."

The researcher explaining the content of Steve Thompson's late-night impression of Alan Partridge at the Comedy Shop - "He just said 'Oh er, my chickens have hatched, and the bolted stablers... and er, I'm Alan Partridge', lots of times..." - followed by Alan's delighted laughter and cry of "Cheeky blighter!"

Where are these from?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Autopsy Turvey on July 12, 2017, 06:30:32 PM
Knowing Knowing Me Knowing You, arguably the most oft-forgotten entry in the Partridge canon!
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: QDRPHNC on July 12, 2017, 07:49:59 PM
Knowing Knowing Me Knowing You, arguably the most oft-forgotten entry in the Partridge canon!

Weird, I thought I was familiar with KMKY (radio and TV), but these don't sound familiar to me.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Andy147 on July 12, 2017, 08:16:50 PM
The second one at least is from the "behind the scenes" episode of the radio series.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: notjosh on July 12, 2017, 08:24:12 PM
The second one at least is from the "behind the scenes" episode of the radio series.

They both are. If you don't know where else to find it, the full episode of Knowing Knowing Me, Knowing You is part of this (http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b06gx1tz) documentary.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: stranger on July 12, 2017, 09:38:46 PM
They both are. If you don't know where else to find it, the full episode of Knowing Knowing Me, Knowing You is part of this (http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b06gx1tz) documentary.

It's on youtube too: www.youtube.com/watch?v=gr-ZNv63Op0
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: BeardFaceMan on July 12, 2017, 09:50:13 PM
Does anyone have a good list of appearances that Coogan has made in character to promote various Partidge things? I'm looking for chat show appearances, radio interviews, red carpet, book readings etc.i know he's done a lot of that sort of stuff, especially the last few years with the books and the films, so I'm sure there's a lot I've missed.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Autopsy Turvey on July 13, 2017, 12:45:53 AM
https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLRhsFN5fOP_lvrf-bP_PwJckfNpzxWA6w

Some assembled there, it's by no means complete of course. The Richard Bacon interview is a minor classic, "I love Five Love, I don't know why it's not digital." I love the bit where Richard asks if the killing of Forbes McAllister still haunts him. "Haunt is a very powerful word. Um... niggle? Niggle, with an L-E."

When Richard argues that Alan's attitude to Forbes McAllister's death might be offensive to his family: "It didn't bother his family because they didn't like him. So when he died, they weren't totally sad."

"I always say there were two victims that day; me, because of everything I went through, but also Forbes McAllister is also a victim in a way, because of course he died."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Glebe on July 13, 2017, 02:55:43 PM
Ammonia on the boat.

Took me years to realise that's rhyming slang rather than an actual boat.

Boat race = face

Crikey, never copped that... always thought it was a detail from the trial, like they literally found ammonia on his boat.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: jobotic on July 13, 2017, 03:20:24 PM
Fack's sake you mugs. Cawse it's his face.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Glebe on July 13, 2017, 03:56:50 PM
We'd best stop getting Alan Ford wrong!

(http://i.imgur.com/T4jBBx5.gif)
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: BeardFaceMan on July 13, 2017, 05:15:14 PM
https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLRhsFN5fOP_lvrf-bP_PwJckfNpzxWA6w

Some assembled there, it's by no means complete of course. The Richard Bacon interview is a minor classic, "I love Five Love, I don't know why it's not digital." I love the bit where Richard asks if the killing of Forbes McAllister still haunts him. "Haunt is a very powerful word. Um... niggle? Niggle, with an L-E."

When Richard argues that Alan's attitude to Forbes McAllister's death might be offensive to his family: "It didn't bother his family because they didn't like him. So when he died, they weren't totally sad."

"I always say there were two victims that day; me, because of everything I went through, but also Forbes McAllister is also a victim in a way, because of course he died."

Lovely job, thank you. I was looking on youtube for stuff and stumbled upon a clip from the Election Night Armistice which I can't believe I hadnt seen before, was wondering if any other gems passed me by. I'm always impressed by people doing improv in-character and Coogan is especially good at it, it always feels like Alan Partrdige talking and never like Steve Coogan telling jokes, like everything Coogan is thinking is always sent through the Alan filter first.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Enzo on July 15, 2017, 02:22:13 AM
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YXGSNckg6G8 (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YXGSNckg6G8)

Couchtripper put up the full Alan & Lynn commentary from the series 1 DVD. Definitely as bad as I remember it, hard not to tune out.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Phil_A on July 15, 2017, 05:59:59 PM
Just found out a Norfolk-based cousin of mine recently attended "An Evening With Ranulph Fiennes"

Is it me or is that the most Patridgean activity it would possible to partake in?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: BeardFaceMan on July 15, 2017, 06:25:49 PM
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YXGSNckg6G8 (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YXGSNckg6G8)

Couchtripper put up the full Alan & Lynn commentary from the series 1 DVD. Definitely as bad as I remember it, hard not to tune out.

Yeah I love Felicity Montague but improv really isn't her thing, that was a chore to get through and I only managed it once, I'm in no hurry to revisit it.

Has anyone been to one of those Partridge quiz nights hosted by Simon Greenall in character as Geordie Michael? I think there's another one happening in Manchester soon.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: FerriswheelBueller on July 15, 2017, 06:36:11 PM
I actually signed myself in under the name 'the Real IRA'! I'll just go and let them know it's me...

....change of plan....crossed wires.

Laughed out loud when reading this, thanks
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Nice Relaxing Poo on July 15, 2017, 08:17:58 PM
Just found out a Norfolk-based cousin of mine recently attended "An Evening With Ranulph Fiennes"

Is it me or is that the most Patridgean activity it would possible to partake in?

Now that Roger is no Moore, I'd say so.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Enzo on July 15, 2017, 08:40:39 PM

Has anyone been to one of those Partridge quiz nights hosted by Simon Greenall in character as Geordie Michael? I think there's another one happening in Manchester soon.

Is this true? I'm booking a flight if it is.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: New Jack on July 16, 2017, 11:00:45 AM
It's sold out  (https://bandonthewall.org/events/alan-partridge-quiz-hosted-geordie-michael/)

Calling him George Michael makes him sound like a Toonside Wham! tribute - one I would gladly watch
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: New Jack on July 16, 2017, 11:51:46 PM
It's sold out  (http://www.cookdandbombd.co.uk/events/alan-partridge-quiz-hosted-geordie-michael/)

Calling him Geordie Michael makes him sound like a Toonside Wham! tribute - one I would gladly watch

Quote is not edit, but I've rammed the point home!
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: yesitsme on July 26, 2017, 03:27:31 PM
I stumbled on the DVD commentary for IAP on youtube the other day.  I hope this isn't going to spoil Partridge for you like it has for me so if I was you and you don't want everything you know about Alan's stay in the Linton Travel Tavern to be ripped out of you like my heart was the time I sae Claire Sommers dancing with Martin Woodall then I'd look away now.

You've got one last chance.

Right, if you're still here and this makes you go 'Whaaaaaaa!' then that's your look out.

Alan and Lynne discussing the goings on say that everyone else was an 'actor', for example they refer to Sophie's laughing at reception as 'corpsing'.  Is this typical Alan twisting the facts to suit his side of the story?  I had to switch off, I felt lied to, I felt Sommersed.

Do they have to admit later on that it was all real or do they persist with the 'actors playing roles' line?

What does that make of IP:WHTTAA and Nomad? 

Oh Alan, why hast though forseken me?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Sebastian Cobb on July 26, 2017, 03:55:34 PM
Sophie's laughing has always been something I loved as it does look very natural, I assumed she was just not suppressing her urge to laugh than actively trying.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: yesitsme on July 26, 2017, 03:57:25 PM
Sophie's laughing has always been something I loved as it does look very natural, I assumed she was just not suppressing her urge to laugh than actively trying.

Yes, but is she 'an actor playing the part of the girl who really worked at the LTT' or is Alan back peddling on the truth to stop him looking silly?  Now I think about it it's probably the latter.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: marquis_de_sad on July 26, 2017, 04:13:44 PM
This is why comic nerds invented canon.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: yesitsme on July 26, 2017, 04:25:22 PM
This is why comic nerds invented canon.

The only other non-Claire Sommers moment I've ever felt 'Nooooooo!' was when the Red Dwarfers woke up and they'd all been playing BTL.  I thought 'No fucking way are you ending it like this!'.

Isn't the point of Alan that we're seeing his life played out as it happens rather than acted out as it happened?  If Alan had scripted everything wouldn't it all have been kushty for him resulting him having the last laugh on every occasion?

Makes a mockery of everything this.  A mockery!
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Autopsy Turvey on July 26, 2017, 04:41:39 PM
I suspect that whole DVD commentary explanation was based on the half-hearted and spurious 'mockumentary' conceit that they invented so that Alan could promote the series in-character. It never made any sense, as SOTCAA pointed out in their curmudgeonly overview of the series, controversially entitled I'm Alan Partridge Was Rubbish: http://sotcaa.org/comment/imalanpartridge.html
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Sebastian Cobb on July 26, 2017, 07:32:04 PM
That sounds like a bit of reframing. I don't think it was ever supposed to be a mocumentary, but I guess it did use mocumentary techniques in filming, I thought that was for realism and budget mainly (cheaper to stick some cameras in a car and have Coogan drive rather than organise a tow or chroma key, cheaper to use a working BBC radio studio than mock one up, etc).
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Utter Shit on July 26, 2017, 09:54:54 PM
I suspect that whole DVD commentary explanation was based on the half-hearted and spurious 'mockumentary' conceit that they invented so that Alan could promote the series in-character. It never made any sense, as SOTCAA pointed out in their curmudgeonly overview of the series, controversially entitled I'm Alan Partridge Was Rubbish: http://sotcaa.org/comment/imalanpartridge.html
What a strange article that is. Aside from being an odd choice for a #hottake, and the stench of misplaced superiority hanging off it (in fairness this was a legal obligation of any SOTCAA article), it's based on such stupid premises.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: yesitsme on July 27, 2017, 08:28:35 AM
I've been up all night thinking and worrying about this.  I've come to the conclusion that Alan claiming everyone else in IAP was an actor fits perfectly with his distorted view of the past and a way for him to shift blame from himself to the rest of the planet and general public.

I might watch the rest of it now.

It'd be only the second DvD commentary I've ever sat through.  Can any other Metro reader match that?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Ballad of Ballard Berkley on July 27, 2017, 11:10:13 AM
I've been up all night thinking and worrying about this.  I've come to the conclusion that Alan claiming everyone else in IAP was an actor fits perfectly with his distorted view of the past and a way for him to shift blame from himself to the rest of the planet and general public.

But that makes Alan sound utterly insane. It's probably best to just ignore that DVD commentary and expunge it from the canon, as it makes no sense whatsoever.

Why would Alan and Lynn record a DVD commentary for a laugh-tracked BBC sitcom depicting fictionalised scenes from their lives? A BBC sitcom in which they play themselves, while everyone else is played by actors. It's a bonkers conceit.

Compare it to the brilliant in-character DVD commentary for This is Spinal Tap, in which the band complain throughout about how the documentary stitched them up. That makes sense and doesn't burst the bubble of the fictional world they've created.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: marquis_de_sad on July 27, 2017, 02:43:36 PM
It really seems like Coogan was asked to do a commentary and didn't want to do it as himself, so did it as Alan as a compromise. Nice idea I guess, but it doesn't work at all.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Autopsy Turvey on July 27, 2017, 02:48:48 PM
In-character Alan commentary would've worked for KMKYWAP. That would be brilliant (as long as Lynn wasn't involved).
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: neveragain on July 27, 2017, 10:40:46 PM
Luckily the real-people KMKYWAP commentaries we have are brilliant. Though each ep does start with Armando creating a reason why Alan can't be present leading to one of my favourite Iannucci quotes, namely, 'Alan couldn't be here today as he's lost his keys in Thetford Forest.'
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Shoulders?-Stomach! on July 27, 2017, 10:45:45 PM
A noticeable very obscure recurrence is Alan's hatred for wasps which pops up in TDT mini news, IAP1, IAP2 deleted scenes, and I, Partridge.

Most people remember the "Shouldn't be here really?" scene of course, but there is some cracking further wasp content such as the wonderful oxymoronic comment treading on a wasp is "unnecessary, but it's gotta be done", and giving advice over the radio about how to destroy a wasp's nest, done in unrestrained glee.

I can't remember if wasps are mentioned or referenced in Mid Morning Matters right now, but it's something I always look out for and hope to hell it's deliberate.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Utter Shit on July 28, 2017, 12:22:51 PM
"unnecessary, but it's gotta be done",
ahahahah
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: iamcoop on July 28, 2017, 01:49:39 PM
"Hear'Say rocker Mylene Klass"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: FerriswheelBueller on July 30, 2017, 02:16:17 PM
From the life-coach Coogan live show when putting down a heckler:

"Now you, Baz, or Daz, or Gaz... whatever your name is"

He called out Legend-Garying before its time.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Tikwid on July 30, 2017, 03:14:19 PM
"I'm really sorry Mr Partridge I...done a shit in a box"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: græskar on August 28, 2017, 09:43:00 AM
"You know what this room says to me? Aqua."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: magval on August 28, 2017, 11:11:18 AM
BRING OUT MY BIG POCKET NOW
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Sexton Brackets Drugbust on August 28, 2017, 02:44:06 PM
Luckily the real-people KMKYWAP commentaries we have are brilliant. Though each ep does start with Armando creating a reason why Alan can't be present leading to one of my favourite Iannucci quotes, namely, 'Alan couldn't be here today as he's lost his keys in Thetford Forest.'

My favourite - which is largely down to Iannucci's very particular, sublime cadence, is along the lines of; "Alan can't make it, as he's got bats."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: FerriswheelBueller on September 01, 2017, 03:11:36 AM
GAUDETE GAUDETE
CHRISTUS EST NATUS
EX MARIA VIRGINE
GAUDETE
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: græskar on September 01, 2017, 10:10:51 AM
"Britain has some of the safest roads in Europe. But this isn't Britain...Dis is DER AUTOBAHN!"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Utter Shit on September 04, 2017, 03:05:42 PM
Rewatched 'Welcome To The Places Of My Life' yesterday, there's a fantastic bit early on where it shows Alan laughing to himself in his car, seemingly for no reason...camera gradually pulls out to show him passing a learner driver.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: vainsharpdad on September 05, 2017, 12:45:13 PM
Tony Le Mesmer:
"Enough of this, Alan. Is there somewhere we can go where we can make mad passionate love?"

Alan:
"Oh, god. Erm, yes. The Moat House hotel in High Wycombe. They know me there, they’re very discreet. You’ll love it, it’s got a twenty-four hour carvery."

What had Alan been up to that they have had to be discrete about, I wonder?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Utter Shit on September 05, 2017, 12:51:32 PM
I love little lines like that, which hint at the depth and darkness beneath the surface. I think I've mentioned it before in this thread, but Michael's "I can't hit customers, I've been told" has a similar undercurrent. Brilliant writing.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Phil_A on September 05, 2017, 01:27:55 PM
There does seem to be an edge of violence always lurking beneath Michael's cheerful facade.

(https://partridge.cloud/grabs/S02E04/gif/PvYdkFPMexob.gif)
(https://partridge.cloud/grabs/S02E04/gif/pjgeWuy6jw6E.gif)
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: vainsharpdad on September 05, 2017, 01:33:58 PM
Michael: Well, it’s just, you know, men who want someone to talk to. They’re just lonely. Look, I cannot not talk to the customers, man. Look, what does it say on me badge “Michael, I’m here to help.”

Alan: No it doesn’t, it just says “Michael”.

Michael: Oh, aye. It does.

Alan: Why did you think it said the rest?

Michael: I don’t know. I must have dreamt it.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on September 05, 2017, 06:33:27 PM
Tony Le Mesmer:
"Enough of this, Alan. Is there somewhere we can go where we can make mad passionate love?"

Alan:
"Oh, god. Erm, yes. The Moat House hotel in High Wycombe. They know me there, they’re very discreet. You’ll love it, it’s got a twenty-four hour carvery."

What had Alan been up to that they have had to be discrete about, I wonder?
The other thing I love about this scene is Alan's unwavering belief in the "rules"

Look. If I get caught in flagrante whilst violating the Highway Code, my wife will find out, I’ll get three points on my license, my insurance premium could go up by thirty percent. That’s not going to happen. Now put your top on and get out. Go, go. Get out.

Actually my favourite line is Ursula, it’s an offence to stop on the hard shoulder unless there is a malfunction with the car. The whole line rests on the situation and the character. Just brilliant.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Shay Chaise on September 05, 2017, 10:35:11 PM
Rewatched 'Welcome To The Places Of My Life' yesterday, there's a fantastic bit early on where it shows Alan laughing to himself in his car, seemingly for no reason...camera gradually pulls out to show him passing a learner driver.

I can't even remember this and it made me laugh. So good.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: QDRPHNC on October 11, 2017, 07:22:35 PM
Actual reason for posting: I wonder if Neil was at that Alan Partridge quiz in Belfast a couple of months ago.

Obligatory content: "Will they be taking me for lunch? I've forgotten my toothpicks."

I think I heard that about 20 times before realizing how funny it was.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: itsfredtitmus on October 12, 2017, 10:12:52 AM
The forced bits of camaraderie with Alan and the Northern builders are rarely brought up. Always loved those
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: checkoutgirl on October 12, 2017, 10:18:26 AM
The forced bits of camaraderie with Alan and the Northern builders are rarely brought up. Always loved those

"Apart from that, I’ve got a smooth chest with a ring of hairs round each nipple. And a think line that sort of builds towards the usual place........Bye."

"I just let off in a tax inspectors face,and it was mostly deliberate."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Utter Shit on October 12, 2017, 10:27:09 AM
The forced bits of camaraderie with Alan and the Northern builders are rarely brought up. Always loved those

Eeeeee 'appen he thinks I'm a right indecisive tit
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Old Gold Tooth on October 12, 2017, 10:36:31 AM
The forced bits of camaraderie with Alan and the Northern builders are rarely brought up. Always loved those

"Have you put t'corpse under t'patio?"

Also:
"Are you married?"
"Yeah."
"Divorced. I've got access to the kids but they don't wanna see meeeee."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: itsfredtitmus on October 12, 2017, 11:41:21 AM
"I was just going to do a cockney walk"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: magval on October 12, 2017, 12:34:05 PM
"Apart from that, I’ve got a smooth chest with a ring of hairs round each nipple. And a think line that sort of builds towards the usual place........Bye."

"I just let off in a tax inspectors face,and it was mostly deliberate."

Here is some worthy pedantry - the line is so good because he says "tax inspectresses".
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: magval on October 12, 2017, 12:34:55 PM
I also love the informative and casual way John says "no, I've not got cancer, Al."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Serge on October 12, 2017, 12:56:14 PM
"I'm one of the anti-cancer set."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: FerriswheelBueller on October 12, 2017, 01:11:06 PM
"I'm one of the anti-cancer set."

A dying breed
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: RedRevolver on October 12, 2017, 01:49:13 PM
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wk-NlvY6O4k

Don't think this has been mentioned: Alan's interview with Jonathon Pierce, the Milky Bar Kid! (Might be live, but I still count it as canon, because it's fucking funny). I think they changed it to a child actor for the telly, I believe, probably for legal reasons and it's a bit shit in comparison.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Cuellar on October 13, 2017, 11:10:21 AM
Regarding the builders, I love Alan's look of terror when the guy says "Seen what I've done in the toilet?".
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Twed on October 13, 2017, 02:51:42 PM
"I was just going to do a cockney walk"
I love that one because it's the opposite of doing something Northerner-related, and he thinks that will pacify the annoyed Mancurian.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Lord Mandrake on October 13, 2017, 03:24:39 PM
An anecdote about his father which finishes "I loved him that day".
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Old Gold Tooth on October 13, 2017, 04:29:14 PM
I love that one because it's the opposite of doing something Northerner-related, and he thinks that will pacify the annoyed Mancurian.

Haha, I like that interpretation. I always took it as Alan doing something "working class" which the Manc builder would clearly understand and relate to.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: FerriswheelBueller on October 13, 2017, 05:39:24 PM
An anecdote about his father which finishes "I loved him that day".

Or a similar line from the autobiography about Lord Byron's duelling pistols after shooting Forbes McAllister in the heart

"Those ruddy guns... I hated them just then"

And from the section later on advancing his side of the story:

"But, to be fair to myself for a change..."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: magval on October 13, 2017, 11:12:25 PM
A couple that get lost in audience laughter from IAP series 1.

When asked if he wants fizzy or still water: "half and half [MASSIVE AUDIENCE LAUGH DROWNING OUT] more bubbles per cc"

and when he mistakes Peter Linehan when he says Tony Hayers is 'up there' and says "oh, I see, you mean in heaven [MASSIVE AUDIENCE LAUGH DROWNING OUT] with the apostles".

But Coogan says "apossles", which is even funnier.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Repeater on October 13, 2017, 11:37:31 PM
Same pronunciation
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Utter Shit on October 13, 2017, 11:39:28 PM
Another one that gets drowned out is when the audience are laughing at him offending his old teacher for a second time in a few seconds, saying he smelled bad. "Just realised that's you as well [AUDIENCE LAUGHTER] shoot me in the head with a massive gun!"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Utter Shit on October 16, 2017, 02:09:48 PM
I'm sure everyone already owns it/doesn't have a Kindle, but just in case: the Nomad autobiography is available on Kindle today from Amazon for 99p.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: magval on October 16, 2017, 02:24:00 PM
Same pronunciation

Not where I'm from, no. That's why I like it. I'm not saying he says it wrong, just different. We'd rhyme it with 'hostel'. I also like the way Coogan says "Scaramange-a" on one of the commentaries instead of "Scaramanga"

Another one - When Alan asks Sonja if she knows who'll be at the Norfolk Bravery Awards*, she replies "who?" in this cheery, almost falsetto manner. I do that often as a result. Like an owl.

*Anyone who's anyone who's in the Norfolk area.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Old Gold Tooth on October 17, 2017, 10:29:11 AM
"Let's do slap hands!" from Mid-Morning Matters.

This is one that's entered my regular usage.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Utter Shit on October 17, 2017, 10:36:07 AM
"Yeah, I suppose it could be that way around" when the black man jokingly accuses Alan of stealing his phone in Mid Morning Matters. Reveals so much about him, desperate for the cool guy's approval but with a backdrop of prejudice.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Old Gold Tooth on October 17, 2017, 10:51:03 AM
"Yeah, I suppose it could be that way around" when the black man jokingly accuses Alan of stealing his phone in Mid Morning Matters. Reveals so much about him, desperate for the cool guy's approval but with a backdrop of prejudice.

Yes! One of my favourite segments, it's so layered and rich with little details.

When the phone turns up under a notepad and Alan automatically says "sorry" to the black man because in his mind it was obvious that he would suspect him of having taken it.
"Why?" the man asks.
"....... Cos I trumped," fibs a panicked Alan.

Absolute comic genius.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: græskar on October 25, 2017, 02:54:48 PM
"And the time, for those who like to tell it in a slightly wacky way, is fifty to six. Or, if you like to develop the idea, seventy past four. Or even… erm…

...

Bear with me...

...

 One thousand, two hundred and thirty to twelve."

Then later: "The time is… let’s not get bogged down in the time again."

I just love that he's so bad he gets "bogged down" in giving the time.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Gwen Taylor on ITV on October 25, 2017, 06:11:28 PM
Not sure it's intentional (it's very subtle if so) but in this scene where he realises his colleagues have played a prank on him, he stumbles and says Alan Fartridge:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2V2NWZBca_0&t=1m (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2V2NWZBca_0&t=1m)
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Gwen Taylor on ITV on October 25, 2017, 06:14:35 PM
"The first caller wishes to remain anonymous, which in my experience means it should be a cracker."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: slapasoldier on October 25, 2017, 06:16:27 PM
Racist
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Cuellar on October 25, 2017, 08:36:45 PM
What?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: FerriswheelBueller on October 25, 2017, 10:53:07 PM
With the builders and their suspiciously 'Bouncing Back' shaped gifts:

"I assume we'll all stay in touch after this"

The look the builders give is superb
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Utter Shit on October 25, 2017, 11:48:34 PM
"The first caller wishes to remain anonymous, which in my experience means it should be a cracker."

YES. A perfect Partridge line, in that it's completely true but absolutely should not be said.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Mobius on October 26, 2017, 01:56:26 AM
"The first caller wishes to remain anonymous, which in my experience means it should be a cracker."

"Now listeners, I have someone on the line who fears he may be a gay. He’s married, so he wishes to remain anonymous. I shall only be using his Christian name. I’m talking to Domingo in Little Oakley

... No? He’s gone. That’s a pity. Marvelous little tapas bar there...."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: græskar on October 26, 2017, 08:13:52 AM
"I'm Alan Partridge. I am Alan Partridge. I've won the essay writing competition, of that there's no doubt."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: hard rocx and mettals on October 26, 2017, 09:44:45 AM
In the swimming baths in Places of my Life:

"And also - sorry, are you alright?"

*obvious cut to Alan looking incredulous* "Yeah I'm absolutely fine."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: ieXush2i on October 26, 2017, 11:43:22 AM
I, Partridge is by far the best use of the character since KMKYWAP, but something bugs me: isn't Alan too old to be wondering about "pornos" at school?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: magval on November 06, 2017, 12:01:51 AM
I love it how he walks into the BP garage and announces "BANG - I'm James Bond". I always forget about that. Fond of his reaction to Frank Raphael asking for a bag of Minstrels too, this sort of mock-impressed "Ooorrr" sound.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: itsfredtitmus on November 06, 2017, 12:09:01 AM
HE'S TALKING ABOUT HIS COCK
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kidsick5000 on November 06, 2017, 09:01:00 AM
"Now listeners, I have someone on the line who fears he may be a gay. He’s married, so he wishes to remain anonymous. I shall only be using his Christian name. I’m talking to Domingo in Little Oakley

... No? He’s gone. That’s a pity. Marvelous little tapas bar there...."

That's pretty much perfect.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: itsfredtitmus on November 06, 2017, 09:08:15 AM
YOU COULDN'T PRESENT... A CAT
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Captain Z on November 06, 2017, 11:17:07 AM
HE'S TALKING ABOUT HIS COCK

Stop getting Bond wrong!

It's "Aye, he means his cock!"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Old Gold Tooth on November 06, 2017, 11:40:35 AM
"I once knew a man who was the size of an ox but with the mind of a child. He didn't like loud noises but, my goodness, could he eat."

Fantastic.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Utter Shit on November 06, 2017, 12:59:55 PM
I'm happy with not knowing for now - in fact I think the possibility of it being something completely fresh is more exciting that the prospect of a new sitcom or chat show. Since returning with the help of the Gibbons brothers, Partridge has crossed quite a wide range of different styles (autobiography, travelogue, documentary, 'live' webcam footage) and it's worked in pretty much every case, with the possible exception of Open Books.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Enzo on November 06, 2017, 02:09:55 PM
HE'S TALKING ABOUT HIS COCK

they cut this out of the Dave repeats and it saddens me greatly.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Enzo on November 06, 2017, 02:15:05 PM
Quote
did he ever turn all the lights off in the house and run towards you with a torch, hoping to try and catch the reflection in your eyes?

when interviewing the son of the inventor of cat's eyes
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: QDRPHNC on November 12, 2017, 01:09:08 AM
QUESTION: I've listened to the I, Partridge audiobook a lot, and I recently downloaded the ebook and am reading it for the first time - lots of things are very different, even an entire chapter that wasn't present in the so-called "unabridged" audiobook. What?

Also: Dave Clifton. Why'd he get so thin?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: FerriswheelBueller on November 12, 2017, 02:31:24 AM
QUESTION: I've listened to the I, Partridge audiobook a lot, and I recently downloaded the ebook and am reading it for the first time - lots of things are very different, even an entire chapter that wasn't present in the so-called "unabridged" audiobook. What?

Also: Dave Clifton. Why'd he get so thin?

Really? I’m a huge fan of the audiobooks and presumed that buying them meant owning the book was pointless. What gives?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: QDRPHNC on November 12, 2017, 02:35:03 AM
Really? I’m a huge fan of the audiobooks and presumed that buying them meant owning the book was pointless. What gives?

That's what I thought too!

Very different! Well... like maybe 10% different.

Lots of footnotes, and a whole new chapter, a clutch of paragraphs I'd never read before, plus the PICTURES SECTION.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: QDRPHNC on November 12, 2017, 02:40:13 AM
Look!

(https://i.imgur.com/Ic9mR1O.jpg)
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Utterdrivel on November 12, 2017, 03:01:20 AM
That's one hell of a thumb, I know that much.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: FerriswheelBueller on November 12, 2017, 03:37:34 AM
Look!

(https://i.imgur.com/Ic9mR1O.jpg)

Lovely stuff, just post pictures of every other new page pls
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Glebe on November 12, 2017, 06:30:13 PM
Mentioned in another thread the other day...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TC8dWWImNzU#t=20s

It's the peeved way he says it that really makes it.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on December 06, 2017, 10:11:02 PM
The whole 'Trump recognising Jerusalem' thing has reminded me of

"You’re always going on about Benjamin Netanyahu. Let it go Lynn you’re never going to meet him"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Mobius on December 06, 2017, 10:43:26 PM
A line which doesn't get a laugh in the show but always tickles me

Alan: That was a company which we set up. We looked into its operation and closed it down again. It was inoperable.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: QDRPHNC on December 06, 2017, 10:54:25 PM
Dr Alban, I say, spot on.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Old Gold Tooth on December 06, 2017, 11:31:59 PM
Sidekick Simon: Well they say don’t they, men are from Mars—
Alan: Women are from moon.
Simon: The moon.

Tim Key’s look of confused frustration as he realises he’s corrected the grammar rather than the actual saying is brilliant. The whole exchange never fails to get me laughing.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Terryfuckwit on December 06, 2017, 11:57:15 PM
'Get you on the old 'Jeans rule' did they? Bloody Nazi's'
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: asids on December 08, 2017, 11:49:55 PM
"Guess which one of you two ladies I'm gonna make love with now" and Lynn's face in reaction is brilliant.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: weaseldust on December 11, 2017, 12:23:57 AM
(http://i1026.photobucket.com/albums/y328/weaseldust/vlcsnap-2017-12-11-00h12m30s859b_zpstmbpfcqb.jpg)
(http://i1026.photobucket.com/albums/y328/weaseldust/vlcsnap-2017-12-11-00h12m50s781b_zpswzfywmqn.jpg)
(http://i1026.photobucket.com/albums/y328/weaseldust/vlcsnap-2017-12-11-00h12m56s107b_zps5ckkxxzg.jpg)
(http://i1026.photobucket.com/albums/y328/weaseldust/vlcsnap-2017-12-11-00h13m06s908b_zpsb1hn5w3s.jpg)
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Bhazor on December 11, 2017, 12:56:06 AM
Sure it's been brought up already but my favourite part of I, Partridge is how it makes the Red Nose Day sketch cannon. Such an obscure moment and it gets an entire chapter and becomes the cause of his breakdown in IAP series 2.

Better continuity than the Marvel Universe.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Noodle Lizard on December 11, 2017, 02:14:17 AM
I'm sure it's already been mentioned, but Alan's patronising "Ooo!" when his former teacher asks for a pack of Minstrels.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Utter Shit on December 13, 2017, 09:46:39 AM
"Guess which one of you two ladies I'm gonna make love with now" and Lynn's face in reaction is brilliant.

Her face when she finds out the meaning of water sports is incredible too. Just staring off into space absolutely horrified, trying to make sense of it.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: DrGreggles on December 13, 2017, 03:55:42 PM
Her face when she finds out the meaning of water sports is incredible too. Just staring off into space absolutely horrified, trying to make sense of it.

"They do it on purpose, Lynn."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: itsfredtitmus on December 13, 2017, 04:48:14 PM
That Face
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: imitationleather on December 13, 2017, 05:14:26 PM
Look!

(https://i.imgur.com/Ic9mR1O.jpg)

I clicked on this thread by mistake, intending to go to the Jim Davidson one, and assumed this was from the ex-Big Break presenter's autobiography. It really reads like it could be.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: asids on December 13, 2017, 08:12:13 PM
"...and 10 years ago, I was broadcasting highly complex traffic information to the whole of the East Anglia region when you were just a foetus, think about that!"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: LORD BAD VIBE on December 14, 2017, 01:46:29 PM
"Flying AIDS!"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on December 14, 2017, 02:10:26 PM
Look!

(https://i.imgur.com/Ic9mR1O.jpg)
What was footnote 175?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: QDRPHNC on December 14, 2017, 02:39:18 PM
"Not even Mrs. Kelly."

I like footnote 181: "For overseas readers not familiar with Doctor Who, the Tardis is a very small police station that can travel through time."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: SteK on December 14, 2017, 02:53:05 PM
Partridge/Coogan also gets his fact wrong too;

Quote
I present a military-based quiz show on a daytime digital channel called UK Conquest. It’s got 8,000 viewers. To put that in perspective, it’s eleven times the population of Hemsby.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hemsby (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hemsby)

Hemsby has a population of 2973 in 2001 - you do the math (s)....

Also in Saxondale he claims Rush's 'Spirit of Radio' is track one, side one, Hemispheres album when it's off Permanent Waves...

Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Utter Shit on December 14, 2017, 03:19:25 PM
Not sure if anyone listens to the Monkey Tennis podcast which reviews the entire Alan canon (it's worth a listen - not a huge amount of fresh background info and the hosts can occasionally be irritating, but they put forward good theories and ask interesting questions about the character/shows), the latest episode is an interview with Simon Greenall and has a few fun tidbits that were new to me...

-there were a couple of scenes from the Tex episode of IAP that didn't make the final edit, one that sounds a bit crap (Alan asks Tex what his favourite state is, obvious response "Texas"...asks Michael, who says is favourite state is "pissed") and one that sounds great (Alan and Michael get into an argument because Alan refuses to believe that Michael has never seen News at Ten).

-a scene edited out of an unnamed episode has Michael slyly snot all over Lynn's back when she walks past him. Greenall emphasised a real mutual hatred between Lynn and Michael that either didn't always make the final edit, or possibly is something he sees in the finished show as a whole that I think is only shown on a few occasions)

-The character of Michael was deliberately underwritten prior to auditions, with auditionees given little info beyond "Michael works in the hotel, used to be in the army and gets on with Alan", originally Michael had planned to do him as a gruff Yorkshireman with a greater emphasis on his army background (the impression he did of this theoretical character sounded a lot like the army caller from Down The Line), I think the idea was for him to be a lot more serious than Michael turned out to be.

-The politely-delivered racism of Kevin Eldon was originally a Michael line which Greenall improvised, asking whether he minded living in London "despite all the blackies".

If I remember any other bits I'll post them up, worth a listen for any Partridge nerds.

http://www.postpoppodcasts.com/monkey-tennis/
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Morrison Lard on December 14, 2017, 04:15:59 PM
Partridge/Coogan also gets his fact wrong too
I'm fairly certain he fucks up pronouncing Wisbech too in some Partridge thing or other.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: magval on December 14, 2017, 04:25:17 PM
Partridge/Coogan also gets his fact wrong too;

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hemsby (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hemsby)

Hemsby has a population of 2973 in 2001 - you do the math (s)....

Also in Saxondale he claims Rush's 'Spirit of Radio' is track one, side one, Hemispheres album when it's off Permanent Waves...

I work with a fellow who'll offer up unasked-for details like this. When I asked him recently if he'd seen Sean's Show, because I knew he would have and the lady I was talking to hadn't heard of Hughes, he replied "yeah, Channel 4 sitcom, three series in the early 90s". I think the problem with people like this - and Tommy Saxondale  - is that their reasonably decent knowledge is often exaggerated but never challenged.

From that perspective, Tommy getting the album wrong is the joke.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Yussef Dent on December 14, 2017, 04:47:35 PM
"That's the Eiffel Tower."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: holyzombiejesus on December 14, 2017, 06:04:03 PM
Partridge/Coogan also gets his fact wrong too;


He also pronounces Wisbech as Wizz-beck rather than Wizz-beach.

Remembered a bit I really liked today from the radio shows. He's talking to Michel Lambert, France's second best racing car driver about Cyrano de Bergerac

Quote
I'm... not... so keen on it, I mean, I don't like what they did with the idea, they set in in the 17th century, gave him a long nose, maybe it made it a bit funnier... but, but for the British, Bergerac is John Nettles... I... I thought you ruined it really... I'm just glad you haven't got your hands on "Lovejoy"... Probably set it in the future! When, of course, antiques will be even more expensive... Not a bad idea really!
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Morrison Lard on December 14, 2017, 06:16:52 PM
He also pronounces Wisbech as Wizz-beck rather than Wizz-beach.
Mate.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: SteK on December 14, 2017, 07:26:56 PM
Come on John, let's go to Sprouston...
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: LORD BAD VIBE on December 15, 2017, 11:55:22 AM
Yeeeaaah, I'm gonna hump ya...

like Deputy Dawg....

would hump ya...

Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Gulftastic on December 15, 2017, 04:41:33 PM
 Actually, Jill, pipe of Pringles will suffice.
 
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: græskar on December 15, 2017, 04:56:04 PM
Lynn, hand me the apple pie and remove yourself from the theatre of conflict.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: checkoutgirl on December 17, 2017, 10:05:18 AM
"...and 10 years ago, I was broadcasting highly complex traffic information to the whole of the East Anglia region when you were just a foetus, think about that!"

"I've gotta life why don't you get one?"

"Have you heard of Robin's Nest? You haven't got a clue"

"It's just a cushion that simulates rectal gas"

"She's mildly cretinous"

"I've been pubic for 31 years"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Artemis on December 17, 2017, 10:11:15 AM
"Who's that going to be?"

*shrugs shoulders*

<on the back of a feature where giving a clue was the ENTIRE POINT>
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: checkoutgirl on December 17, 2017, 10:13:27 AM
"Don't put your foot there"  "I wasn't I was just doing a cockney walk"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: checkoutgirl on December 17, 2017, 01:35:25 PM
"Say I didn't have a breakdown"

"You didn't have a breakdown"

"I know"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: McDead on December 17, 2017, 06:01:38 PM
“Noel’s. House. Party.”
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Autopsy Turvey on December 18, 2017, 01:23:32 AM
Last question to Roger Daltrey: "When do you hang up the old jean jacket, when people say 'Oi, you should be wearing tartan slippers, not wearing rock shoes and shiny trousers'?"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kidney on December 18, 2017, 07:34:43 PM
The entire "Partridge Over Britain" debate bit in KMKYWAP is gold but I especially love Alan having a go at the Labour woman when Schneider's character begins speaking over her.

Excuse me, he's trying to speak! Such a rude woman.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Autopsy Turvey on December 18, 2017, 08:04:30 PM
I imagine "Immigration. It's a political hot potato. Charlotte Rampling, catch." must have been flagged up already.

EDIT: Ah, yes, page three. In which case, I love the Peter Hitchens relish with which he specifies "Hanged by the neck until the spinal column is severed thus starving the body of oxygen."

EDIT AGAIN: Might as well do the whole bloody sentence, it's a string of gems. "We see these pictures of old woman's faces in the paper, surely the best way to deal with hooligans is to hang them by the neck until the spinal column is severed thus starving the body of oxygen, isn't that the best, most sensible way to deal with them?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Nice Relaxing Poo on December 18, 2017, 08:17:54 PM
Then everything went quiet... head spinning...mouth dry... and suddenly keen for a poo.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Neville Chamberlain on December 19, 2017, 09:10:50 AM
I love the bit in Nomad about Norfolk and Suffolk coming together to create a new super-county called "Norfolk", the name being derived from the "Nor-" of "Norfolk and the "-folk" of "Suffolk". Tickles me, that does.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: SteK on December 19, 2017, 09:04:10 PM
I’ve totally indoctrinated my 22 yo son into the way of Partridge, so much so that when I came back from working away and said ‘I’m just grabbing something from the fridge’, he Immediately pipes up in a perfect Michael voice ‘There’s nae food in it...’

Quick as a flash, he had me by the jaffas....
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: checkoutgirl on December 21, 2017, 11:03:09 PM
"It's a good'un, pop it in the mouth"

"You've never heard of Bernie Inn?"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Twed on December 21, 2017, 11:58:32 PM
I’ve totally indoctrinated my 22 yo son Fernando into the way of Partridge
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: SteK on December 22, 2017, 12:26:40 AM


And I had a similar event with my daughter Denise.....
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on December 22, 2017, 07:41:27 AM
To an innocent bystander, it could, may look like traffic cone theft. And I’m an innocent bystander, and to me it looks like traffic cone theft...

Just drive away, drive away normally. Stop panicking. Start the engine. Switch the alarm off! Lynn! Lean back! Stay still. I was technically in charge of a motor vehicle then, I could have been done for drink driving.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: checkoutgirl on December 22, 2017, 11:05:34 AM
"Nice to meet you Colin"

"Colin?"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Malcy on December 22, 2017, 01:16:07 PM
Non partridge but 'A wank I think' from Coogans run popped up on my FB memories today. Always found that to be a bit Partridgey.

Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: magval on December 22, 2017, 07:45:06 PM
Hastily improvised pringle shroud.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Gwen Taylor on ITV on December 23, 2017, 10:43:51 AM
"A hot egg."

[pause]

"And a crescent of crisps."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: buttgammon on December 23, 2017, 03:25:57 PM
"Side clump of cress."

I particularly enjoy the way he acts out a crescent of crisps being spread on the plate and the clump of cress being slammed down on it.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: magval on December 25, 2017, 12:17:14 AM
The RUDE...Fanny Thomas!
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Mobius on December 27, 2017, 07:04:50 AM
“Don’t shine that torch in my face mate, I’ve just lost a pint of blood”
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Utter Shit on December 27, 2017, 10:24:35 AM
I'm sure everyone already knows, but just in case: New Alan Partridge show on BBC2 at 9pm. Might be a slight misuse of the word 'new' there as it's not entirely clear how much of it is going to be old footage (in fact I'm not even completely sure whether it's an in-character show or a straight documentary, the promo for it now seems to be suggesting it's a doc but the makers have been more vague) but I'm sure it will be worth catching. Preceded by a special edition of Vic and Bob's Big Night Out.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: DrGreggles on December 27, 2017, 11:02:28 AM
Something along the lines of the Coogan doc from a few years ago would be good.
Although the best bit about that was Vic & Bob pissing about anyway.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: magval on December 27, 2017, 11:17:29 AM
Vic and Bib aren't on til Friday bud
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Repeater on December 27, 2017, 11:21:30 AM
dafty
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Utter Shit on December 27, 2017, 11:30:53 AM
Something along the lines of the Coogan doc from a few years ago would be good.
Although the best bit about that was Vic & Bob pissing about anyway.

Weird, in the paper it said 8.30 tonight!
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: DrGreggles on December 27, 2017, 11:58:05 AM
Something along the lines of the Coogan doc from a few years ago would be good.
Although the best bit about that was Vic & Bob pissing about anyway.

Like this: http://www.dailymotion.com/video/x2lolkh
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on December 27, 2017, 03:34:33 PM
“Don’t shine that torch in my face mate, I’ve just lost a pint of blood”
Part of what is possibly the greatest 5 minutes of comedy, ever.

New page so go and eat some coffee, drink it. It’s soup you can eat. Lots of liquid.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: FerriswheelBueller on December 27, 2017, 04:32:24 PM
Part of what is possibly the greatest 5 minutes of comedy, ever.

New page so go and eat some coffee, drink it. It’s soup you can eat. Lots of liquid.

I got someone a full fun pack for their birthday. Copy of the daily express, vodka miniature, digital watch with denim strap, the works. Took a shitload of work and was underappreciated.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: SteK on December 27, 2017, 06:13:35 PM
Part of what is possibly the greatest 5 minutes of comedy, ever.

New page so go and eat some coffee, drink it. It’s soup you can eat. Lots of liquid.

Two grand that cost..

Actually Partridge's Norfolk accent slipped when he says 'Daily Express' - pure Manc that was...

Cotton and Guns...
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: magval on December 27, 2017, 06:57:20 PM
Does he not say "it's soup you can eat but what's a liquid"?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Twed on December 27, 2017, 06:57:50 PM
I don't think Partridge is ever Norfolk (i.e. he doesn't sound like a sack of potatoes) but I know what you mean about Coogan's Manc occasionally slipping through.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: magval on December 27, 2017, 07:59:53 PM
I got someone a full fun pack for their birthday. Copy of the daily express, vodka miniature, digital watch with denim strap, the works. Took a shitload of work and was underappreciated.

I'd appreciate this. I had a similar idea after I realised I had re-giftable items laying about that had "Savoir Faire" and "Lazarus" written on them, but I've yet to commit to finding the other four. Five, if you count "and Andy".
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Enzo on December 27, 2017, 09:34:44 PM
Something along the lines of the Coogan doc from a few years ago would be good.
Although the best bit about that was Vic & Bob pissing about anyway.

Very true. They made that doc. Maybe only outshined by Coogan's Irish old lady with a scarily accurate West Cork accent.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: weaseldust on December 28, 2017, 03:17:47 AM
you go careful there now, my love
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Cold Meat Platter on December 28, 2017, 04:21:45 AM
AH
HA!
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: yesitsme on December 28, 2017, 10:50:24 AM
I got someone a full fun pack for their birthday. Copy of the daily express, vodka miniature, digital watch with denim strap, the works. Took a shitload of work and was underappreciated.

This country.

That bit, from where he starts to admonish Lynne for saying he's 'nearly fifty' - oh my sweet baby Jesus.  I genuinely couldn't breath through that I was laughing so much.  The build up with the intercom chats and eventual puking and his foot coming out of his shoe 'that's not going back in'.  Fantastic.

I know a few people who don't like the South African bit but that too, the rolling of the orange, the 'gents' sign on the door/table.  Great.

Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Artemis on December 28, 2017, 01:24:35 PM
The Chicory Tip Incest Cup
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: FerriswheelBueller on December 28, 2017, 06:45:40 PM
This country.

That bit, from where he starts to admonish Lynne for saying he's 'nearly fifty' - oh my sweet baby Jesus.  I genuinely couldn't breath through that I was laughing so much.  The build up with the intercom chats and eventual puking and his foot coming out of his shoe 'that's not going back in'.  Fantastic.

I know a few people who don't like the South African bit but that too, the rolling of the orange, the 'gents' sign on the door/table.  Great.

The digital watch with denim strap was an eBay purchase in the end, couldn’t find anywhere else.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: SteK on December 28, 2017, 10:30:26 PM
Very true. They made that doc. Maybe only outshined by Coogan's Irish old lady with a scarily accurate West Cork accent.

Think he uses the same accent as Fancie Feeley in Moone Boy, I work in Dublin and dread speaking to Cork people!!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UpBnLBYbc0M&feature=youtu.be (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UpBnLBYbc0M&feature=youtu.be)
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Artemis on January 04, 2018, 02:30:02 PM
"Hum a theme tune is Thursday. It's always been Thursday."

From the 'unused Alan' extras on the IAP2 DVD - funnier than anything in the show itself.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Norton Canes on January 11, 2018, 10:21:09 AM
Just done another IAP S1 marathon, this time to introduce my son to the delights of Partridge. There's no subsequent mention of what happened to the five-year BBC contract that was 'signed' after the untimely demise of Chris Feathers, is there? Always seemed a bit strange that at the start of S2 we learn he's spent the intervening time presenting cable TV quiz shows and straight-to-video crash compilations. Maybe there's an untold chapter there?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Utter Shit on January 11, 2018, 10:32:40 AM
In the autobiography there is a section which explains what happened - can't remember the exact details but Partridge suggests (while claiming it was all above board, of course) there was an inquiry which established that the signature wasn't legit, so he didn't get the contract.

That first autobiography is worth reading even if you're not a huge Partridge nerd - it adds so much colour to everything that comes before it.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: thraxx on January 11, 2018, 10:43:17 AM
In the autobiography there is a section which explains what happened - can't remember the exact details but Partridge suggests (while claiming it was all above board, of course) there was an inquiry which established that the signature wasn't legit, so he didn't get the contract.

That first autobiography is worth reading even if you're not a huge Partridge nerd - it adds so much colour to everything that comes before it.

Second this, but listen to the audiobook, retold by Partridge himself!
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Norton Canes on January 11, 2018, 10:47:55 AM
Ah, cheers. I did read I, Partridge a while ago but had forgotten that bit.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: SteK on January 11, 2018, 11:47:18 AM
I want a copy of 'Bouncing Back' I know it doesn't actually exist but I still want one. Even a audio book of silence would do.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: magval on January 11, 2018, 02:00:58 PM
Just done another IAP S1 marathon, this time to introduce my son to the delights of Partridge. There's no subsequent mention of what happened to the five-year BBC contract that was 'signed' after the untimely demise of Chris Feathers, is there? Always seemed a bit strange that at the start of S2 we learn he's spent the intervening time presenting cable TV quiz shows and straight-to-video crash compilations. Maybe there's an untold chapter there?

Another odd one is the fact he killed a man on live television but they proceeded with a (presumably obligated) Christmas episode.

Or even that he was allowed on TV after your man died on the last episode of the radio series. As I remember, the only 'canon' inconsistency not explained by the books is his wife dying and reviving on On The Hour, though I think someone on here offered the neat theory that Alan just went along with whatever was said to him on that show because at least he was allowed to be on the radio.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: SteK on January 11, 2018, 02:45:57 PM
Another odd one is the fact he killed a man on live television but they proceeded with a (presumably obligated) Christmas episode.

Or even that he was allowed on TV after your man died on the last episode of the radio series. As I remember, the only 'canon' inconsistency not explained by the books is his wife dying and reviving on On The Hour, though I think someone on here offered the neat theory that Alan just went along with whatever was said to him on that show because at least he was allowed to be on the radio.

I think in the book Alan said he was born in 1955, making him 58 in Alpha Papa, which didn't seem right...

Also harking back to a previous moan of mine, the viewing figures of Skirmish do not equate to eight times the population of Hemsby...

Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: hermitical on January 11, 2018, 05:06:24 PM
Spotted in my local Oxfam

In a bullnose, on the left
(https://i.imgur.com/dKCyAF0.jpg?1)
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Malcy on January 12, 2018, 10:00:48 AM
Spotted in my local Oxfam

In a bullnose, on the left
(https://i.imgur.com/dKCyAF0.jpg?1)


Did you buy it?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Dr Rock on January 12, 2018, 11:51:41 AM
Another odd one is the fact he killed a man on live television but they proceeded with a (presumably obligated) Christmas episode.

Or even that he was allowed on TV after your man died on the last episode of the radio series.


https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Noel_Edmonds
 (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Noel_Edmonds)
Quote
The Late, Late Breakfast Show
The programme is remembered for several accidents during its regular "Give it a Whirl" stunt slot; in particular the death of Michael Lush. The show was cancelled by the BBC on 15 November 1986, following the death of Lush two days earlier. While rehearsing a bungee jump to be performed live on the show, Michael Lush plunged 120 feet (37 m) to his death when his rope came loose. Noel Edmonds quit the show immediately afterwards.

Telly Addicts
Telly Addicts was a BBC1 game show hosted by Edmonds, broadcast from 3 September 1985 until 29 July 1998.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: hermitical on January 12, 2018, 11:57:56 AM
Did you buy it?

Nah, this was a few weeks ago. Still there though, I checked this week.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: checkoutgirl on January 12, 2018, 12:04:27 PM
Part of what is possibly the greatest 5 minutes of comedy, ever.

New page so go and eat some coffee, drink it. It’s soup you can eat. Lots of liquid.

I always thought that was "It's soup you can eat that's a liquid"

Because he told them to eat coffee but you can't eat coffee you drink it. So he was clarifying that the liquid that you can eat is soup not coffee. It makes sense to me anyway. "Lots of liquid" has no logic to it that I can see. I know he had lost a pint of blood and was disoriented in the scene and any script you find online will say "Lots of liquid" but I still think I'm right.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: magval on January 12, 2018, 12:08:32 PM
I agree, to the point of bullishness. There's no way Alan isn't saying "but that's a liquid" there. Doesn't work at all otherwise. DVD subtitles might clairfy this, as they pick up the drowned-in-laughter "more bubbles per cc" after Alan asks for a half and half water in IAP1.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Utter Shit on January 12, 2018, 12:24:56 PM
Best bit of the pierced foot scene is lost underneath the audience laughter, he reacts to Lynn telling him to take his foot off the spike by saying "then all the blood will run out of my foot, you old mess". "You old mess" is a fantastic insult.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: checkoutgirl on January 12, 2018, 12:29:31 PM
his wife dying and reviving on On The Hour

"bit of a hoy there"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: checkoutgirl on January 12, 2018, 12:30:37 PM
I think in the book Alan said he was born in 1955, making him 58 in Alpha Papa, which didn't seem right...

That's open to debate but he looks there or there abouts for sure.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Thomas on January 12, 2018, 12:38:48 PM
Quote
I think in the book Alan said he was born in 1955, making him 58 in Alpha Papa, which didn't seem right...

That's open to debate but he looks there or there abouts for sure.

In Alpha Papa, at 58, he's supposed to be as old as Morrissey is now. Seems about right to me. Pierce Brosnan is 64, and he looks like he could still dangle out of a window or jog through a radio studio.

It's just as he's about to pierce his foot that he reprimands Lynn for saying that he's 'nearly fifty', isn't it? That was in 2002, so it all fits.

Aside from the surreality of the world in On the Hour and The Day Today, and the promotional material surrounding I'm Alan Partridge (which briefly pretended that the series was a documentary, probably so Coogan could appear as Alan to promote it - same with Alpha Papa when he attended the premiere), they've done an admirable job of continuity. 
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: BeardFaceMan on January 12, 2018, 12:49:53 PM
I think the only misstep they've done with Partridge is they went a bit too heavy on the ageing make up in IAP S2, it took a while to adjust to how he looked from MMM onwards because he looked so old previously. Other than that the continuity for Partridge has been bang on.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: mrpupkin on January 12, 2018, 12:53:55 PM
From Alpha Papa: "I'm 55 years old, I should be at home in bed watching funny videos on Youtube"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Thomas on January 12, 2018, 12:54:27 PM
I think the only misstep they've done with Partridge is they went a bit too heavy on the ageing make up in IAP S2, it took a while to adjust to how he looked from MMM onwards because he looked so old previously. Other than that the continuity for Partridge has been bang on.

We could blame that on the stress of his breakdown and rapid weight loss. I also wouldn't put it past Alan to have had a bit of work done since then. The wig they use for him is certainly thicker and more luxurious than in IAP.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: checkoutgirl on January 12, 2018, 01:17:43 PM
they've done an admirable job of continuity

Spanning what, 26 years. It's a remarkable feat in continuity and quality writing. Any negative criticism of it seems very nitpicky.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Dr Rock on January 12, 2018, 01:28:21 PM
Alan may well have had some work done. Even just a facelift. Pretty sure Madeley and Edmunds have.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Captain Z on January 12, 2018, 04:03:11 PM
Spanning what, 26 years. It's a remarkable feat in continuity and quality writing. Any negative criticism of it seems very nitpicky.

Even the retrospective continuity (mentioned on a previous page, but worth repeating), where it is revealed in IP:WNTTAA that his 'debagging' in a Comic Relief sketch between S1 and S2 of IAP was the trigger for his breakdown, and to a lesser extent his introduction to Toblerones by Pepsi or Shirlie from Pepsi and Shirlie, is incredibly well thought-out.

Ok that second one isn't really continuity, but shows a very high commitment to accurate backstory.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: BeardFaceMan on January 12, 2018, 04:04:08 PM
Considering the amount of Partridge stuff out there, their dedication to the continuity is amazing,  I really wish more people gave enough of a fuck about their past work to not dismiss it but use it in a new way. Contrast this with something like Red Dwarf (which I've been rewatching lately) where the writers never let continuity get in the way of a gag they've just thought of, far better to just go with it than worry about what you've written previously. Good continuity shows that you care about the characters, that you're building something, creating actual characters with back stories that make sense, rather than just using the characters as a vessel to tell your gags, whether they fit the character or not.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: QDRPHNC on January 12, 2018, 04:29:34 PM
Best bit of the pierced foot scene is lost underneath the audience laughter, he reacts to Lynn telling him to take his foot off the spike by saying "then all the blood will run out of my foot, you old mess". "You old mess" is a fantastic insult.

Also love the "you take your foot off / my foot's not on a spike" exchange there.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: asids on January 12, 2018, 07:08:25 PM
Also love the "you take your foot off / my foot's not on a spike" exchange there.

"You're just quoting bits of Casualty now!"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: SteK on January 12, 2018, 08:31:48 PM
For some reason this jumped into my head;

Lynn's a good worker but she's a bit like Burt Reynolds; very reliable, but she's got a moustache....
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: checkoutgirl on January 14, 2018, 06:19:17 PM
Soleros, Magnums, Mini Milks and a Feast.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: 3S96 on January 14, 2018, 06:34:39 PM
It's not strictly Partridge canon (well, it is, but it's from The Day Today) but his entire report from Marple is excellent, especially the names of the horses: Onion Terror, Zeinab Badawi's Twenty Hotels, Epileptic Fridge Boy, Small Town Gypsy Massacre and Trust Me, I'm a Stomach, will never not make me laugh.

However, it's his hope that two girls playing won't "escalate into blind, ugly violence" that always stays with me. That phrase pops into my head at least once a week. I say it out loud occasionally, but no-one has yet commented on its Partridgian origins.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: St_Eddie on January 15, 2018, 12:28:19 AM
...his entire report from Marple is excellent, especially the names of the horses: Onion Terror, Zeinab Badawi's Twenty Hotels, Epileptic Fridge Boy, Small Town Gypsy Massacre and Trust Me, I'm a Stomach...

Epileptic is a better man/horse than you or I will ever be.  Shame him at your peril.  That's all I'm saying.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Tikwid on January 15, 2018, 09:11:22 AM
It's not strictly Partridge canon (well, it is, but it's from The Day Today) but his entire report from Marple is excellent

I always thought Alan's weird "let him lie in it. let him lie in it!" aside at the start of the jockey interview was pretty funny, but rewatching it the other day I only just noticed Chris doesn't even get to finish his link in, and just trails off awkwardly as Alan interrupts. "Back to today's races; Alan Partridge is at the, erm......hm." That's what I love so much about the AP canon: there's great little details you only notice on your second viewing, and then there's even greater and littler ones you don't notice til your tenth.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: non capisco on January 17, 2018, 08:51:00 PM
It's not strictly Partridge canon (well, it is, but it's from The Day Today) but his entire report from Marple is excellent, especially the names of the horses: Onion Terror, Zeinab Badawi's Twenty Hotels, Epileptic Fridge Boy, Small Town Gypsy Massacre and Trust Me, I'm a Stomach, will never not make me laugh.

However, it's his hope that two girls playing won't "escalate into blind, ugly violence" that always stays with me. That phrase pops into my head at least once a week. I say it out loud occasionally, but no-one has yet commented on its Partridgian origins.

"Not sure what that is...I hope it's not a..hur hur..a dead horse! They're not going to fit it in the back of a Volvo 340."

The joy of that sequence is that it's most probably Coogan improvising as Partridge over the top of some stock BBC horse event footage. "Altogether a better class of...fat lady." And the way he gleefully says "Two Headed Sex Beast" is sublime.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on January 17, 2018, 09:05:56 PM
The interview with the show jumper has me shaking with laughter.

"If he gives you any trouble you can ride me round the paddock "

Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: non capisco on January 19, 2018, 10:13:36 PM
"I've just realised, I've been slagging off Buddhists. We might get a fatwa on our heads."
"Erm...they're not Muslims."
"Oh, yes of course!"
"Buddhists can't do anything. You can punch a Buddhist and they can't punch back."
"That's like Mickey Mouse at Eurodisney. Although if he gets you in the car park afterwards he will leather you."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: non capisco on January 19, 2018, 10:27:00 PM
"And now from a chillout compilation I found at a boot sale. It's fantastic! This...is Glockenspiel Dreams."

Yes, I'm rewatching Mid Morning Matters series 2.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Autopsy Turvey on January 27, 2018, 03:44:52 AM
"The cracker is five feet high, the height of a large cow, and 23 feet long, that's about the length of a small Chinese restaurant."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: to infect aside on January 28, 2018, 12:21:36 PM
Pronunciation of 'whey' in the footnote about protein shake ingredients, near the beginning of the audiobook version of Nomad.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Ornlu on March 10, 2018, 04:28:05 PM
"unfortunately Michael, we live in a world where people would rather watch clips of idiots driving cars like maniacs into berks."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: bgmnts on March 10, 2018, 04:29:36 PM
Second this, but listen to the audiobook, retold by Partridge himself!
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: ColinPopshed on March 21, 2018, 02:31:17 PM
However, it's his hope that two girls playing won't "escalate into blind, ugly violence" that always stays with me.

I still remember sitting my mate down to that ep of TDT in 1994. Our humor was so similar but he wasn’t going for it, until that line when he erupted with laughter and was completely hooked into it from that point.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: ColinPopshed on March 23, 2018, 02:08:35 PM
Something which stuck with me from Nomad, was when he is in a shop “buying 2 Magnums... Magna”.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: magval on March 23, 2018, 03:11:49 PM
After Morris says "Handy with a mallet", Alan replies "I certainly think I could use weaponry". A great wee disjointed interaction.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Malcy on April 10, 2018, 12:06:30 AM
Back of the net!

https://twitter.com/AccidentalP/status/982900609820086272
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Mobius on April 10, 2018, 12:51:33 AM
Back of the net!

https://twitter.com/AccidentalP/status/982900609820086272

Hahaha.

In I, Partridge it’s revealed that Schofield and Alan actually worked together early in their career at the in-store radio station of Our Price, and Schofield was relentlessly bullied so we know where he picked those habits up..
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Bronzy on April 10, 2018, 01:26:19 AM
"And a bag of Minstrels"

"Oooooh!"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: St_Eddie on April 10, 2018, 02:10:38 AM
Back of the net!

https://twitter.com/AccidentalP/status/982900609820086272

That's wonderful!  The cutaway to her disapproving and insulted face is pure gold.

"And a bag of Minstrels"

"Oooooh!"

Heh.  That's a favourite of mine.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: GentleJoshing on April 10, 2018, 07:42:19 AM
Two more bits from I, Partridge (hopefully not been posted before on this thread):


My demons hadn't been exercised; they'd been rounded up and shot. And now, as I bulldozed then into a mass grave with a fag in my mouth, I could move on with my life.

Go to the pulping of my own book? - how dare he, HOW DARE he.
I was deeply moved by what I saw at the paper mill the next day.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: DrGreggles on April 10, 2018, 07:44:39 AM
"And a bag of Minstrels"

"Oooooh!"

Love that. No idea why, but I love it.

It's similar to the bit in Bottom that always cracks me up:
"I've imputed your data..."
"Ooooh!"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: buttgammon on April 10, 2018, 10:28:50 AM
There's a bit in Nomad where the tramp has abandoned Alan and taken one of his shoes, and he's left calling after him in a confused, hungover daze. The bit in the audiobook where he keeps saying "Brian, Brian, Brian, Brian, Brian" is a weird earworm.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: big egg on April 10, 2018, 11:50:27 AM
Also from Nomad (apologies if this is a re-post):

Try-hard friends of mine have started to snub turkey in favour of goose or duck, like they're in the 1850s. I'm surprised they don't have a clothes mangle and a pale aunt who coughs blood into a hankie.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Captain Z on April 10, 2018, 01:50:00 PM
There's a bit in Nomad where the tramp has abandoned Alan and taken one of his shoes, and he's left calling after him in a confused, hungover daze. The bit in the audiobook where he keeps saying "Brian, Brian, Brian, Brian, Brian" is a weird earworm.

Yes. I've drifted off to sleep a few times listening to Nomad and this bit always wakes me up.

Last night I discovered this deleted scenes compilation from IAP1 that I'd not seen before, I suspect it's from the DVD but very funny nonetheless: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jZE1hBzkisk
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: St_Eddie on April 10, 2018, 06:42:35 PM
"And a bag of Minstrels"

"Oooooh!"
Love that. No idea why, but I love it.

I think it's the suggestion that treating yourself to a bag of minstrels is really pushing the boat out and the manner in which Alan coos, perhaps also suggests that there's something slightly camp about enjoying a bag of minstrels.

That's why I find it so funny, if I'm to get all analytical, at any rate.  It's mostly just funny because it's an absurd reaction to someone buying some confectionery though.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Utter Shit on April 10, 2018, 06:48:53 PM
It also ties in with Alan's general love of sweet things - not just the Toblerone addiction but various mentions of Milky Ways, Twixes, the Sunny Delight debacle...doesn't he try to calm himself down after the minor car crash in IAP by buying himself a Solero?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: QDRPHNC on April 10, 2018, 07:39:52 PM
I always took that "ooooh" to mean that he considers Minstrels a rather fancy treat (on a headmaster's salary).

It also ties in with Alan's general love of sweet things - not just the Toblerone addiction but various mentions of Milky Ways, Twixes, the Sunny Delight debacle...doesn't he try to calm himself down after the minor car crash in IAP by buying himself a Solero?

This crept up on me over the course of Nomad, how fucking awful Alan's diet is. Fried breakfasts, quavers in bed, Asda ham, jam bombs...
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: thraxx on April 10, 2018, 07:44:52 PM
Love that. No idea why, but I love it.


I think it's the suggestion that treating yourself to a bag of minstrels is really pushing the boat out and the manner in which Alan coos, perhaps also suggests that there's something slightly camp about enjoying a bag of minstrels.

That's why I find it so funny, if I'm to get all analytical, at any rate.  It's mostly just funny because it's an absurd reaction to someone buying some confectionery though.

Thing is though, in my house, Minstrels were considered an exceptional treat. I was about 10 before i ate a minstrel, because my mother (twat) would make a great play of hidning them and eating them without sharing them. My (twat) father did the same thing, but with Munchies. So anyway, yes, that AP quote has always resonated with me.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Huxleys Babkins on April 10, 2018, 08:22:30 PM
I always took that "ooooh" to mean that he considers Minstrels a rather fancy treat (on a headmaster's salary).

This crept up on me over the course of Nomad, how fucking awful Alan's diet is. Fried breakfasts, quavers in bed, Asda ham, jam bombs...

In I, Partridge he mentions stopping off in McDonald’s before his show and having “six or seven hash browns”.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: buttgammon on April 10, 2018, 08:59:02 PM
Yes. I've drifted off to sleep a few times listening to Nomad and this bit always wakes me up.

Same here! No wonder it gets stuck in my head.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: magval on April 10, 2018, 09:12:36 PM
In I, Partridge he mentions stopping off in McDonald’s before his show and having “six or seven hash browns”.

Straight on the bucket list.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Ornlu on April 10, 2018, 09:55:55 PM
It also ties in with Alan's general love of sweet things - not just the Toblerone addiction but various mentions of Milky Ways, Twixes, the Sunny Delight debacle...doesn't he try to calm himself down after the minor car crash in IAP by buying himself a Solero?

That and the absurd specificity of him mentioning the Bravery Award woman's cut-off hand being packed in with some Soleros, Magnums, Mini Milks and a Feast.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on April 10, 2018, 10:09:07 PM
Whenever I'm driving the words, "minor women's whiplash" pop into my head.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: magval on April 10, 2018, 10:47:33 PM
That and the absurd specificity of him mentioning the Bravery Award woman's cut-off hand being packed in with some Soleros, Magnums, Mini Milks and a Feast.

Yes! One Feast!
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: paruses on April 10, 2018, 11:14:37 PM
That and the absurd specificity of him mentioning the Bravery Award woman's cut-off hand being packed in with some Soleros, Magnums, Mini Milks and a Feast.

To my mind the Bravery Award presentation is one of the funniest bits in the canon outside of I, Partridge and doesn't get old. There's the gleeful introduction, the sincere description, and then the fact he is unable to look away from her. And the actress plays it so well too with her slow deliberate progress.

That and the absurd specificity of him mentioning the Bravery Award woman's cut-off hand being packed in with some Soleros, Magnums, Mini Milks and a Feast.

I wonder how long it took them to get that perfect rhythm to the list.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Artemis on April 10, 2018, 11:31:36 PM
I wonder how long it took them to get that perfect rhythm to the list.

Not long, I expect. End with a monosyllabic, instantly recognisable item, juxtaposed against other wankier sounding items. It's not rocket science.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: The Lion King on April 11, 2018, 02:36:07 AM
Also from Nomad (apologies if this is a re-post):

Try-hard friends of mine have started to snub turkey in favour of goose or duck, like they're in the 1850s. I'm surprised they don't have a clothes mangle and a pale aunt who coughs blood into a hankie.

So vivid, took me by surprise when I read it and did a weird shouty surprised laugh. Great stuff
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Shaky on April 11, 2018, 05:55:39 AM
The section in Nomad about swimming is pure gold.

"Benevolent human Kraken"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: marquis_de_sad on April 11, 2018, 04:17:04 PM
Not long, I expect. End with a monosyllabic, instantly recognisable item, juxtaposed against other wankier sounding items. It's not rocket science.

Just because they make it look easy doesn't mean it was.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Cuellar on April 11, 2018, 04:23:01 PM
Not long, I expect. End with a monosyllabic, instantly recognisable item, juxtaposed against other wankier sounding items. It's not rocket science.

Well, YOU come up with a hilarious list of ice creams then. RIGHT NOW.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Twed on April 11, 2018, 04:42:49 PM
Strawberry Miffin.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: FerriswheelBueller on April 12, 2018, 01:07:45 AM
Ruminating on what his mate and his wife got up to in the tent he borrows in Nomad.

“...but then I think about Keith rolling over, and I don’t like it any more - I ask my mind to make it stop, please”
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: The Lion King on April 12, 2018, 08:19:40 AM
Not long, I expect. End with a monosyllabic, instantly recognisable item, juxtaposed against other wankier sounding items. It's not rocket science.

mini milks are far from wanky though
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Nice Relaxing Poo on April 12, 2018, 04:26:09 PM
"Alan!" she shouted through the letter box like a gynaecologist bellowing into a woman
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: QDRPHNC on April 13, 2018, 07:50:11 PM
I literally just witnessed a real-life Accidental Partridge.

Two presenters on-stage, one of whom is in a wheelchair.

"I never thought we'd be standing here together," said the other guy.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: magval on April 13, 2018, 08:17:00 PM
I was at a 'staff engagement day' today for work and one of the speakers, HR manager of some description, used the phrase "it's evolution not revolution".
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on April 13, 2018, 10:25:23 PM
It’s Latin. You ought to have a basic grasp of Latin if you’re working in Curry’s
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: FerriswheelBueller on April 14, 2018, 12:31:05 AM
I literally just witnessed a real-life Accidental Partridge.

Two presenters on-stage, one of whom is in a wheelchair.

"I never thought we'd be standing here together," said the other guy.

A thing of beauty.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: islandboy on April 14, 2018, 08:14:12 PM
"H O T T E S T  Y E L L O W  P A S T E"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: iamcoop on April 14, 2018, 11:32:20 PM
When considering potential names for his house;

“The cinnamons - it’s just a lovely ingredient”
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Bronzy on April 15, 2018, 12:39:20 AM
"Needles to say, I took drugs."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Uncle TechTip on April 15, 2018, 04:26:24 AM
<aside> I'm gonna fire a gun....
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: FerriswheelBueller on April 15, 2018, 05:46:59 AM
He still smokes like 1920s gangster! ... who even the other gangsters think, smokes to excess...
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: St_Eddie on April 15, 2018, 06:12:06 AM
"Needles to say, I took drugs."

Easily the best scene from I'm Alan Partridge series 2.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: magval on April 15, 2018, 08:57:11 AM
Look into my eyes... You are feeling very sleepy... If my soothing voice is soothing enough, it should be sending you listeners at home to sleep.

Are you asleep?

Well WAKE UP, because I, Alan Partridge, am not a hypnotist.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Bronzy on April 15, 2018, 12:08:16 PM
Easily the best scene from I'm Alan Partridge series 2.

"You really have got a LOT of issues."

"Yeah, of What Car? magazine!"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: buttgammon on April 15, 2018, 11:10:25 PM
"The plague started from a malattended surface" - proto-Medieval Desolation from Partridge, there.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: islandboy on April 16, 2018, 07:58:22 PM
“Norwich.



One.



Adult.



Afternoon.



Inception.



No.



Inception.



No.



Inception.



No.



Inception.



No.



Inception.



No.”
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: dex on April 19, 2018, 08:10:17 PM
When brooding over Tony Hayers at Swaffam country fair:

"I'd throw cabbages, hot bovril and gravel" [at him]
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Utter Shit on April 19, 2018, 08:40:41 PM
Did he hit you, or was it a shove?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: FerriswheelBueller on April 20, 2018, 02:49:37 AM
On badgers

“...well you have to control them - they have TB...”

It’s the weird sideways delivery that sells it.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: bollocks on April 20, 2018, 07:47:28 PM
"I forget if his name was Jim or Tom. So I'll call him Jom."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on April 20, 2018, 07:53:03 PM
Is Bill Oddie dead?

No! Bill Oddie’s alive and well, Sophie. Well, he’s alive.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: DrGreggles on April 20, 2018, 08:49:37 PM
"He thinks he's Rod Stewart."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: magval on April 24, 2018, 04:35:51 PM
Alright, we'll do it. Ladies and gentlemen, TWO DOGS! ...two dogs...
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on April 24, 2018, 10:48:17 PM
“It’s just coming up to 9:11…oooh don’t tell Abu Hamza, he’ll be cracking open the Champagne. Oh, they don’t drink do they?!”
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Cuellar on April 25, 2018, 09:51:52 AM
"He rips off my chaps. He insists I use a condom, a dicky jacket"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on April 27, 2018, 04:04:37 PM
I’m gonna hump ya… like Deputy Dawg… would hump ya
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on May 10, 2018, 10:46:28 PM
"Go stand by the Yakults."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: St_Eddie on May 10, 2018, 10:59:13 PM
"Let's go, Lynn.  These people are starting to annoy me."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Bazooka on May 11, 2018, 07:05:47 AM
When Alan is speaking with the builders in series 2.

AP: "Did you see the match?"

Builder: "Which one?"

AP: " Dunno"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: batwings on May 11, 2018, 08:02:06 AM
"I'm on the Marmite fence."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: popcorn on May 14, 2018, 05:39:16 PM
Rewatching Spinal Tap for the first time in over a decade. It struck me that the director's intro (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-qWbaZOksP4) is essentially Alan Partridge but done with a chummy American instead of a middle Englander. Lines like "I remember being knocked out by their exuberance, their raw power, and their punctuality," and even the little body language jokes like the briefly folded arms, are very easy to imagine Alan doing.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: QDRPHNC on May 14, 2018, 07:14:51 PM
You pull your foot off.
Mine’s not on the spike.

Not oft-forgotten maybe, but obscured by laughter.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: The Lion King on May 14, 2018, 07:21:18 PM
You pull your foot off.
Mine’s not on the spike.

Not oft-forgotten maybe, but obscured by laughter.

and just before that - you old mess
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: St_Eddie on May 14, 2018, 07:33:16 PM
and just before that - you old mess

I always misheard that as "your Holiness".
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: sevendaughters on May 14, 2018, 07:42:45 PM
"...and HWHAT lovely butter."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Utter Shit on May 14, 2018, 07:48:02 PM
and just before that - you old mess

At some point in that exchange he also accuses Lynn of quoting Casualty.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: big egg on May 14, 2018, 08:24:35 PM
"...and HWHAT lovely butter."

And HWHAT chicken nuggets
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Malcy on May 15, 2018, 05:58:45 PM
Not a Partridge quote but did just spot this review of the Series 1 DVD on Amazon.

Quote
0 out of 5 starsRipped Off big time !
ByWayne A Rheinbergeron 3 January 2012
Format: DVD
When I finally got around to watching this DVD it was not the correct show as specified. Instead I got a screen with a hotel menu to watch in house movies, and I couldn't even access any of these. The extras disc was correct though which was even worse as it made me want to watch the show even more.
To be fair this is the first time I have ever received a DVD like this in all my time of buying DVD's from Amazon.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: St_Eddie on May 15, 2018, 06:56:20 PM
Not a Partridge quote but did just spot this review of the Series 1 DVD on Amazon.

*shakes head* This Country (and the clueless people in it)...
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Twed on May 15, 2018, 09:53:22 PM
That sounds like he didn't get past a creative DVD menu.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: St_Eddie on May 16, 2018, 12:14:00 AM
That sounds like he didn't get past a creative DVD menu.

I know.  The series 1 DVD has a faux Linton Travel Tavern cable channel menu, upon startup.  It's funny and a nice touch.  That fella was just be a bit dense.  If nothing else, you'd have thought that he might have been clued in by the disc having the words 'I'm Alan Partridge - Disc 1' printed on it.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: McChesney Duntz on May 16, 2018, 12:46:49 AM
Not only that, but he seems upset that he couldn't even access Bangkok Ladyboys for his troubles.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: St_Eddie on May 16, 2018, 01:24:13 AM
Not only that, but he seems upset that he couldn't even access Bangkok Ladyboys for his troubles.

Haha, indeed.  When you try to access that feed a message pops up telling you that the channel has been disconnected, if I recall correctly.  That must be what the dozy twit was referring to in his review.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Twed on May 16, 2018, 01:32:59 AM
He also does that classic think of thinking that a fault in a product is Amazon's fault, like Amazon is a big factory that makes everything.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: alltalknotrousers on May 16, 2018, 05:59:58 AM
This thread title always makes me think of a line from Nomad: 'I'm touched by his enthusiasm for my canon'
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: The Lion King on May 16, 2018, 06:32:38 AM
What does he actually say when he crashes in the car park trying to box Siobhan in? Always though it sounded like 'Answer me!' because his airbag doesn't 'answer' by going off. Script says it's 'into me', but what is it supposed to mean?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: magval on May 16, 2018, 08:19:20 AM
He wants the airbag to go into him, but because it doesn't happen he compensates by verbalising it.

How I've always taken it.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Utter Shit on May 16, 2018, 08:39:31 AM
Yeah it's difficult to hear but it's definitely "into me", referring back to when he talks about liking the idea of an airbag going off in his face. He pushes himself into it when he crashes and later complains about it not activating. U wouldn't say he's compensating for it not going off though, I think he's just anticipating the impact.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Obel on May 16, 2018, 12:26:52 PM
Partridge's expression when he hits the airbag is such a bizarre thing, gets me every time
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Cuellar on May 16, 2018, 02:00:46 PM
The way he gets up off a sofa in his house after inadvertently escaping the siege in Alpha Papa.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Jerzy Bondov on May 16, 2018, 03:36:25 PM
It's not oft-forgotten at all but the capper to Alan's Deep Bath 'Brought to you, by Dettol' always make me laugh when I think of it
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Bronzy on May 16, 2018, 03:44:43 PM
DANNY FRANCHETTI'S JAZZ BOX, THIS SUNDAY AT EIGHT
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Huxleys Babkins on May 16, 2018, 03:51:23 PM
It's not oft-forgotten at all but the capper to Alan's Deep Bath 'Brought to you, by Dettol' always make me laugh when I think of it

Ties in nicely with the bit in I, Partridge where he describes insisting that new sexual partners share a hot bath with Dettol in it.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: bollocks on May 16, 2018, 04:01:24 PM
DANNY FRANCHETTI'S JAZZ BOX, THIS SUNDAY AT EIGHT

sorry, new digital system
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Thomas on May 16, 2018, 04:16:06 PM
Whenever I'm driving the words, "minor women's whiplash" pop into my head.

My girlfriend was driving us into an unfamiliar part of town the other day, and we almost became mildly lost and she was starting to get worried, so I told her 'calm down, [name], you're suffering from minor women's confusion'. We did laugh.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Twed on May 16, 2018, 06:16:13 PM
Not a quote so much, but I find it hilarious when in Scissored Isle he describes his sorrow over the chav remarks, and then his surprise at himself for almost immediately doing it again.

From memory: "I vowed never to make the same mistake again. And yet, in an incident that beggars belief, I made a similar mistake the following night at a golf club gala."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Mobius on May 16, 2018, 09:53:04 PM
Not a quote so much, but I find it hilarious when in Scissored Isle he describes his sorrow over the chav remarks, and then his surprise at himself for almost immediately doing it again.

From memory: "I vowed never to make the same mistake again. And yet, in an incident that beggars belief, I made a similar mistake the following night at a golf club gala."

I love that bit.

"There's a shitstorm coming my way..."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: DrGreggles on May 16, 2018, 10:06:27 PM
The first 4 seconds of this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iKt8BvpdL7Q
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Terryfuckwit on May 16, 2018, 10:41:37 PM
I love that bit.

"There's a shitstorm coming my way..."

Chaps not Chavs. We come here to get away from the Chavs. Off, back to your council houses.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on May 16, 2018, 10:45:12 PM
The first 4 seconds of this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iKt8BvpdL7Q
Coogan's face when Terry gives it the full, "Do you wanna get sucked in, cause I'll suck you in, son." is utterly brilliant. He physically crumbles.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: paruses on May 16, 2018, 10:46:24 PM
The first 4 seconds of this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iKt8BvpdL7Q

Maybe more for the "little things that make you laugh disproportionately" thread but I always laugh at:

"I don't want..I don't to get sucked in"

[Edit - not just me then...]
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: asids on May 17, 2018, 12:01:00 AM
"Yeah, yeah, I could do that, I'm supposed to be doing a sales conference for Nabisco at the Birmingham Metropole, but I could get Nick Owen to do that, he owes me one"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on May 17, 2018, 07:22:36 PM
I was wondering how long it would take before the show descended into some French hidden buttock agenda.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on May 17, 2018, 09:45:41 PM
I love the way his mind works when interviewing. For example, with Roger Daltry:

"You must have been devastated by the advent of the cordless microphone."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Nice Relaxing Poo on May 19, 2018, 03:31:50 PM
"Her contraptions are MASSIVE"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: sevendaughters on May 20, 2018, 11:43:14 AM
sponsored by Dettol
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Old Gold Tooth on May 20, 2018, 07:30:43 PM
"I once inherited a clock. Beats buying 'em."

Funny in itself, but the fact he uses this exact phrase twice (in a Mid-Morning Matters and then in Scissored Isle) really tickles me as it's clearly something Alan feels is a good insight despite being weirdly specific and mundane.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: rm2kmaster on May 21, 2018, 10:11:45 AM
"I once inherited a clock. Beats buying 'em."

Funny in itself, but the fact he uses this exact phrase twice (in a Mid-Morning Matters and then in Scissored Isle) really tickles me as it's clearly something Alan feels is a good insight despite being weirdly specific and mundane.

Also a favourite of mine.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Captain Z on May 24, 2018, 08:16:03 PM
"WHOOSH! He's swimming now, his body slicing through the water like a sharp dolphin"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Norton Canes on June 03, 2018, 08:10:41 PM
"Four years ago, Susan lost her hand in a cake-cutting machine. She managed to walk 400 yards, holding her hand in her other hand, where she hailed a taxi. One can only imagine what that must have looked like"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: zammo1 on June 13, 2018, 11:28:52 PM
Quote
And I was still on the dance floor at 8 o' clock the next morning.

At 10 o' clock I had a meeting with the mayor.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Ornlu on June 19, 2018, 08:44:05 AM
Learned from one of the comments that at the 2.49 mark of the KMKY ABBA Medley, Gina Langland - who has to rush off for her gig at Earls Court - checks Alan's watch for the time.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gnFT2eQy_Cw (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gnFT2eQy_Cw)
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Terryfuckwit on June 19, 2018, 01:11:37 PM
Knowing Me, Knowing You! ♪♫♬


...with Alan Partridge
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Norton Canes on June 19, 2018, 03:29:49 PM
Apropos of nothing in particular I've just mistyped 'analogy' as 'alanogy', which should surely be coined as a term for a particular kind of Partridge pronouncement. 
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Nice Relaxing Poo on June 19, 2018, 04:24:19 PM
The laboured intro to the World Cup segment:

"...as we look forward to all the sporting action that will take place in this year's 1994
World Cup finals in America, in Alan Partridge's World Cup Countdown to '94."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Spudgun on June 20, 2018, 03:33:11 PM
Learned from one of the comments that at the 2.49 mark of the KMKY ABBA Medley, Gina Langland - who has to rush off for her gig at Earls Court - checks Alan's watch for the time.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gnFT2eQy_Cw (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gnFT2eQy_Cw)

Something else a surprising number of people miss is Joe Beazley lobbing Cheeky Monkey across the stage as he walks off in a huff:

https://youtu.be/Y6oajPBSnO8?t=3m18s
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: paruses on June 20, 2018, 04:31:45 PM
To the French racing driver in the radio series:

"What's your favourite haute cuisine; hot food?"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Sgt. Duckie on June 20, 2018, 05:07:07 PM
'Perhaps Brian was merely an invention of my fortified wine addled mind. Perhaps in my drunkenness I'd been sitting here shooting the breeze with a pile of old, pissy clothes.'
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: St_Eddie on June 20, 2018, 05:18:31 PM
Something else a surprising number of people miss is Joe Beazley lobbing Cheeky Monkey across the stage as he walks off in a huff:

https://youtu.be/Y6oajPBSnO8?t=3m18s

Who the heck misses that?!  It's the punchline to the whole skit and absolutely brilliant.  Poor Cheeky Monkey!
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Spudgun on June 20, 2018, 09:34:48 PM
Who the heck misses that?!  It's the punchline to the whole skit and absolutely brilliant.  Poor Cheeky Monkey!

I've had to point it out to more than one person. I love the fact that it comes so soon after Joe being so protective of anyone even touching the monkey, and the next thing you know...
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: yesitsme on June 25, 2018, 12:26:25 PM
I think it's when Alan comes out of the bathroom pre-chocolate mousee fuelled sexual liason with a woman in her 50s he has a big terry towel dressing gown on and a small hand towel which he twirls around and tries to casually hook around his neck but it's too small and just springs open.

Nice little bit of business.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: jobotic on June 25, 2018, 12:55:16 PM
Something else a surprising number of people miss is Joe Beazley lobbing Cheeky Monkey across the stage as he walks off in a huff:

https://youtu.be/Y6oajPBSnO8?t=3m18s

It's his little "Oh God" that is my favourite bit.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: FerriswheelBueller on June 25, 2018, 01:16:34 PM
The audiobooks have a surprisingly high number of these

“...it’s a wrap-party for season 38 of Watchdog, which I still think should have been called Ombudsman, but I’m keeping my thoughts to myself on that tonight...”

“Rightly or wrongly, by which I mean wrongly, people feel a sense of ownership over their DJs...”

“Ray Mears once told me, and indeed anyone who watched that night’s episode, that humans only use 10% of their strength...”
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Captain Z on June 25, 2018, 09:22:59 PM
Frig it! I work hard, it's friday night... I want a glass of wiiine
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: QDRPHNC on June 25, 2018, 09:42:09 PM
oooooooh Ladyboys
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Chriddof on June 26, 2018, 12:07:01 AM
The whole peculiar and completely ill-thought-out World Cup '94 Countdown guide with the "Soccer Meter" in The Day Today. Most people remember the goal commentaries at the start, but other highlights are:

* His absurdly long introductory link
* The convoluted way the Soccer Meter works, where it can only be properly seen from a camera up in the ceiling, it has alphabetical ordering that stops at N, and the colour codes ("...that's my colour coding, not FIFA's...")
* "They get progressively... le - fewer..."
* When starting to demonstrate the Soccer Meter, one of the signpost things noisily brushes against his clip mic, making him do this odd little "aaaaahhh" sound
* Not being able to locate San Francisco when it's right in front of him

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8SPIaDGTYgc
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: magval on June 26, 2018, 12:15:27 AM
That 'aaaaaa' that you mentioned is one my favourite sounds. I love the sounds Alan makes when he's in pain, however minor.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: FerriswheelBueller on June 26, 2018, 04:43:42 AM
The correct distinction between less/fewer infinitely endears him to me.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: magval on June 26, 2018, 07:59:27 AM
Where is it that he broadcasts the distinction between repel and repulse? MMM?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Yussef Dent on June 26, 2018, 09:28:34 AM
"Between Chile and Paraguay, something like that," neither of those nations were in that World Cup, in fact Chile were banned from qualifying for it.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Jobey on June 26, 2018, 09:28:39 AM
Knowing Me Alan Partridge, Sacking You Glen Ponder.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Utter Shit on June 26, 2018, 09:40:38 AM
Where is it that he broadcasts the distinction between repel and repulse? MMM?

Yeah, MMM. One of the occasional times where he goes into what I assume is an attempt at a vague Terry Wogan impression. Or is that just me? A number of times he puts on Wogan's intonation, though not really the accent.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: magval on June 26, 2018, 10:08:20 AM
Knowing Me Alan Partridge, Sacking You Glen Ponder.

Alan flubs a line in that scene. Says he gave Glen his 'brig break'.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Chollis on June 26, 2018, 02:03:30 PM
On Fred West - "that man...what a Dilbert!"  as if Fred's just spilled a drink or something

the
"Alan...Alan....Alan!"
"nngghappyvalentine"

jingle I can't seem to find a clip of
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: St_Eddie on June 26, 2018, 02:51:34 PM
I don't care much for the second series of I'm Alan Partridge (it's too broad, in my opinion) but there's undeniably some crackling lines in there.  Two of my favourite Michael moments from said series...

Micheal: "I cannae not talk to the customers, man. Look, what does it say on me badge; “Michael, I’m here to help.”
Alan:  "No it doesn’t, it just says 'Michael'."
Michael:  "Oh, aye. It does."
Alan:  "Why did you think it said the rest?"
Michael:  "I don’t know. I must have dreamt it."

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Michael:  "I cannae punch customers, man.  I've been told."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: vainsharpdad on June 26, 2018, 08:55:25 PM
Oh, he’s just a mate.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Utter Shit on June 26, 2018, 09:00:38 PM
That line about not hitting customers is fantastic. So much back story packed into eight words.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: DrGreggles on June 26, 2018, 10:02:04 PM
"Mine is 'Robin's Nest'"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: holyzombiejesus on June 26, 2018, 10:36:51 PM
Referring to Sherlock Holmes as 'the great bard' and bragging that he has all his books "leather bound".
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: FerriswheelBueller on June 27, 2018, 02:15:14 AM
Referring to Sherlock Holmes as 'the great bard' and bragging that he has all his books "leather bound".

The Sherlock Holmes/Dr Watson description in Nomad is really something.

Especially with the “...yes, Cecil Road was my home” concluding line.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: yesitsme on June 27, 2018, 03:22:41 PM
What about the Sidekick 'SS' Simon jingle that has gurgles, whooping and boings going on with marching boots underneath it?

Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: The Lion King on June 27, 2018, 05:50:01 PM
Season 1 episode 6 of MMM is possibly my favourite 20 mins of partridge. I love his relationship with Zoe. The variations on Kate Bush's 'ooh, he's here again, the man with the child in his eyes' have me in stitches every time.

From the same episode -

Alan drinks Zoe like a milkshake, then shouts loudly 'CAN I HAVE ANOTHER?? I'M STILL THIRSTY!'

in reference to ugg boots -

'I thought you were talking caveman language, ooga booga looga, or some sort of witchdoctor voodoo - woo, booga booga, me mend lady leg, with blood from monkey and milk from.....nother monkey'


'He's a big cheese poo'
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: wooders1978 on June 27, 2018, 10:01:13 PM
Today we’re talking about corner shops and what part of “multipack, not to be sold separately” do they not understand?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: magval on June 27, 2018, 11:35:09 PM
Really like the way Minnie Driver says "I used to be a man" in a bad baritone.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: St_Eddie on June 28, 2018, 07:39:35 PM
"Norwich."

...

"One."

...

"Adult."

...

"Afternoon."

...

"Inception."

...

"No."

...

"Inception."

...

"No."

...

"INception."

...

"No."

...

"In.Cep.Tion."

...

"Nooo."

...

"Inception?"

...

"No."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on June 29, 2018, 04:51:36 PM
Frankly my dear I don't give a damn.


Of course I do. I do give a damn.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Ornlu on June 29, 2018, 05:40:05 PM
Frankly my dear I don't give a damn.


Of course I do. I do give a damn.

"Flatley my dear, I don't Riverdance (give a damn)."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Tikwid on June 29, 2018, 07:51:06 PM
So much from A Chill Breeze, or, A Glowering Glassblower This Way Comes. Alan doing the cow noises, having to hastily recorrect the traffic report + Range Rover product placement, the repeated background ʳᵉᵐᵃʳᵏᵃᵇˡᵉ, and actually getting to see him chastised for putting on such a shitshow (a relative rarity in MMM where much of his company-delivered comeuppance happens offscreen, ie the royal visit feed cutting out or the aftermath of the sheep teen rant).
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Mobius on June 29, 2018, 11:38:16 PM
I think that episode of MMM (series 2 episode 1 i think?) is probably the funniest Partridge ep of anything. It’s just rammed with brilliance.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: QDRPHNC on June 29, 2018, 11:56:42 PM
SOMETIMES I WISH I COULD JUST FLY THAT DAMN CHINOOK TO HEAVEN, HAVE A CHAT WITH MY MUM AND THEN FLY BACK TO BASE
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: asids on June 30, 2018, 12:33:52 PM
After Alan calls Susan a "blonde bastard...from the future" when having lunch with the guys from RTE, he follows it up by calling her a twat and sticking his fingers up. Never noticed that before, another attempt to really emphasise his disdain for the Travel Tavern in front of the RTE guys.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Terryfuckwit on June 30, 2018, 01:39:01 PM
https://youtu.be/kKf1R1gmsKY?t=46s

'What are your three rules for life?'

'Well, I have three rules, Ray'

You can tell Alan is annoyed that this rehearsed question was fumbled
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: QDRPHNC on July 01, 2018, 03:46:45 AM
waw-waw-waw-waw-waw waw-waw-waw-waw-waw waw-waw-waw-waw-waw wawwwwwww BAM
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: magval on July 01, 2018, 08:20:15 AM
After Alan calls Susan a "blonde bastard...from the future" when having lunch with the guys from RTE, he follows it up by calling her a twat and sticking his fingers up. Never noticed that before, another attempt to really emphasise his disdain for the Travel Tavern in front of the RTE guys.

Jesus he does too. Well caught. 'Twat' seems dubbed in afterwards, too, rather than lost in the laughter.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: buttgammon on July 01, 2018, 10:47:25 AM
After Alan calls Susan a "blonde bastard...from the future" when having lunch with the guys from RTE, he follows it up by calling her a twat and sticking his fingers up. Never noticed that before, another attempt to really emphasise his disdain for the Travel Tavern in front of the RTE guys.

Wow! Never noticed this before either! I assume that's the moment when Susan turns around and looks at him, leaving him looking embarrassed.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: magval on July 01, 2018, 10:50:20 AM
Some trivia relating to that episode - Armando and company were trying to finish series 1 of IAP before Linehan and Matthews finished series 3 of Ted as both were writing and shooting at the same time, so they gave them those parts to divert their attentions.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Norton Canes on July 25, 2018, 10:04:34 AM
Watched IAP S2 E6 for the first time in ages last night. Had forgotten all about the curse-filled traffic news jingle.

Also watched KMKY E1. The bit where Alan greets Sue Lewis and says "Got a quick whiff of your perfume there" is brilliantly creepy and wouldn't be out of place in a scene with Susan at the LTT.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Utter Shit on July 25, 2018, 10:09:28 AM
Watched IAP S2 E6 for the first time in ages last night. Had forgotten all about the curse-filled traffic news jingle.

I love that so much. To the point that any time I hear a car horn on the road now, internally I go "get out of the way ya f-king idiot".
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: paruses on July 25, 2018, 10:11:18 AM
Watched IAP S2 E6 for the first time in ages last night. Had forgotten all about the curse-filled traffic news jingle.

The jingles are great - I like the food one which builds to desperate cries for help from starving people. They stretch them out just enough to be too much.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Harry Badger on July 25, 2018, 10:42:02 AM
"Now though, a chill-out compilation I found at a car boot sale. It's fantastic, this is Glockenspiel Dreams."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on July 25, 2018, 10:59:49 AM
I've been rewatching Knowing Me Knowing You for the first time in ages and forgot how many amazingly funny things this show has. One such moment is episode 4, where he's in France and has the French co-host, and he meets a French lorry driver whose also called Alan Partridge (but a Frenchified version) and Alan presents him with a bizarre painting of a British Bulldog with frog's legs, to celebrate the friendship of Britain and France.

(http://i.imgur.com/NpCveB3.jpg)

I laughed so hard at this bit. Completely forgot about it. Fucking great, and the look on the guy's face is golden:

(http://i.imgur.com/yjfGxzF.png)


Just watched this, possibly for the first time ever as I don't recall seeing the extras before. The guy's face is brilliant, he looks nervous and confused and Alan is so annoyed that this bloke isn't grateful.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on July 25, 2018, 11:29:29 AM
Rereading this thread and so I've had 'Diddly dit dee dee 2 ladies' in my head all day.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: notjosh on July 25, 2018, 12:00:10 PM
Referring to Sherlock Holmes as 'the great bard' and bragging that he has all his books "leather bound".

Here's what I've never got about that bit: Alan mistakenly thinks Sherlock Holmes was a real person and has never heard of Conan Doyle. The author and supposed literary expert Lawrence Camley then straightens him out by explaining that Holmes can't be real otherwise he wouldn't have been able to "describe in intimate detail the circumstances of his own death". Alan accepts this argument, apparently not realising that a) Watson narrates almost all of the stories and b) Sherlock Holmes doesn't actually die in any of the books.

Is this a very subtle character joke, or were the writers as clueless as Alan?


Referring to Sherlock Holmes as 'the great bard'

You're conflating this with the child prodigy episode where he says something is "better than Shakespeare... worthy of the great bard" . Stop getting Partridge wrong.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: magval on July 25, 2018, 01:09:57 PM
I think chances are the writers just went with the broad strokes for the easy gag of Alan thinking Holmes is real. Same as "The Best of the Beatles" - it doesn't matter that it doesn't exist, it fits the joke.

I've never liked that segment about Holmes. I simply don't buy that Alan's that stupid. That's retroactive consideration of material since, but still.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: paruses on July 25, 2018, 01:17:03 PM
I've never liked that segment about Holmes. I simply don't buy that Alan's that stupid. That's retroactive consideration of material since, but still.

I never bought that bit either although the astonishment that the Irish parliament could be involved has just made me laugh.

From that show I am going to nominate the relationship guru getting the couple to make pledges - "..and I pledge to take a lover to ease the pain" - it's the immediate aftermath of that that's great. I usually tack it onto the end of things these days when my wife says things like "do you promise you'll empty the washing machine when I'm out". She never remembers what I'm on about (or maybe that's fine for me to do. I should check).

Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: notjosh on July 25, 2018, 02:56:43 PM
I think chances are the writers just went with the broad strokes for the easy gag of Alan thinking Holmes is real. Same as "The Best of the Beatles"

Not this thread as well. I'll soon clear this up:
https://twitter.com/Not_Josh/status/1022110531858120704
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on July 25, 2018, 03:06:12 PM
"Mohammed has brought the mountain to you. Although it's not a mountain, it's a photocopier."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on August 21, 2018, 10:24:22 AM
Imagine Debbie Harry in camiknickers spoon-feeding a beef vindaloo to Pan's People in a sauna in Bangkok.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: magval on August 21, 2018, 10:47:21 AM
Asking the guy who only eats food if he gets it for free if he'd eat an egg that looks OK "...but it's from the ninetieees", from Alan Partridge's, SciSSORED IsLe.

Also, the little smile he cracks while scanning at the tills in the same episode, as he's talking about the experience in voiceover. Delightful.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: paruses on August 21, 2018, 12:34:47 PM
Asking the guy who only eats food if he gets it for free if he'd eat an egg that looks OK "...but it's from the ninetieees", from Alan Partridge's, SciSSORED IsLe.

Also, the little smile he cracks while scanning at the tills in the same episode, as he's talking about the experience in voiceover. Delightful.

In the same freegan scene I like the little aside:
Freegan: My Wife's a lecturer...
AP: Aren't they all? [nods for man to continue]


I think it's more the glance the freegan gives him and the assuredness of AP's assertion.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Tikwid on August 21, 2018, 03:50:41 PM
From Basic Alan:
Quote
"Would you like a mint?"
"...No."
The phrasing of that last "no" speaks so much to Alan's disappointment at that moment, even more than the "sack Lynn" voice memo shortly after (though that's a highlight of the episode as well).
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Artemis on August 21, 2018, 04:28:10 PM
It's his little "Oh God" that is my favourite bit.

I enjoy how he changes the pronoun as soon as Alan bursts the bubble.

"Don't touch it!"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: FerriswheelBueller on August 29, 2018, 10:31:19 PM
At Tony Hayers’ funeral after finding out he was 41.

“All those people who say ‘life begins at forty’. They’re noticeable by their absence.”

Also: “Second class degree in media studies from Loughborough University: what a waste”
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: QDRPHNC on August 30, 2018, 04:31:29 PM
At Tony Hayers’ funeral after finding out he was 41.

“All those people who say ‘life begins at forty’. They’re noticeable by their absence.”

Also: “Second class degree in media studies from Loughborough University: what a waste”

Paraphrasing, but... "Up there... with the apostles..."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Ballad of Ballard Berkley on August 30, 2018, 04:48:51 PM
"Norwich."

...

"One."

...

"Adult."

...

"Afternoon."

...

"Inception."

...

"No."

...

"Inception."

...

"No."

...

"INception."

...

"No."

...

"In.Cep.Tion."

...

"Nooo."

...

"Inception?"

...

"No."

For some reason, the very idea of Alan wanting to watch Inception at the cinema is funny.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: jobotic on August 30, 2018, 05:31:30 PM
At Tony Hayers’ funeral after finding out he was 41.

“All those people who say ‘life begins at forty’. They’re noticeable by their absence.”


I'd forgotten that. Fantastic.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Twed on August 30, 2018, 05:39:30 PM
For some reason, the very idea of Alan wanting to watch Inception at the cinema is funny.
On his own
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on August 30, 2018, 05:40:22 PM
At Tony Hayers’ funeral after finding out he was 41.

“All those people who say ‘life begins at forty’. They’re noticeable by their absence.”

Also: “Second class degree in media studies from Loughborough University: what a waste”
"Is something the matter?"
"I want to go and talk to him over there."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: FerriswheelBueller on August 30, 2018, 08:54:44 PM
"Is something the matter?"
"I want to go and talk to him over there."

Oh bollocks, here’s the full scene. Treat yourself.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=dMLwT1LXFAU

Alan’s response to the widows holiday plans had me cackling.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on August 30, 2018, 09:07:54 PM
Another Alan shrug I'd forgotten about
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Ballad of Ballard Berkley on August 30, 2018, 10:14:27 PM
On his own

A midweek afternoon screening. Alan in a sparsely attended multiplex watching Inception. Probably bought himself a hot dog with all the trimmings and a large Pepsi. Quite sweet, really.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: petrilTanaka on August 30, 2018, 10:59:54 PM
Oh bollocks, here’s the full scene. Treat yourself.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=dMLwT1LXFAU

Alan’s response to the widows holiday plans had me cackling.

that Castrol GTX reveal is fantastic
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Cuellar on August 31, 2018, 11:27:19 AM
The look on his face when he turns back to the sex video after Dan's wife says 'So's that' in relation to Corian being illegal in the US.

(https://i.imgur.com/xAxq5MV.png)
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Cuellar on August 31, 2018, 11:41:07 AM
Another Alan shrug I'd forgotten about

And in response to the same man, and same introduction!
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on August 31, 2018, 04:20:34 PM
And in response to the same man, and same introduction!
Oh my god!!!!
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on August 31, 2018, 04:22:50 PM
I hope that I remember to say, "Can I offer you my deep, deep dismay on this very bad, bad day," next time I'm at a funeral
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: QDRPHNC on August 31, 2018, 04:26:24 PM
It's all just... pain in the arse.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Twed on August 31, 2018, 04:29:47 PM
"Well, they say don't they, men are from Mars and Women are from Moon!"

Also amusing how Sidekick Simon 'corrects' him to "The Moon".
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Ornlu on August 31, 2018, 04:53:28 PM
*remember to call Bill Oddie for-* "That's something else."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Utter Shit on August 31, 2018, 07:00:08 PM
The entire thanks and condemnations section at the start of Nomad  is so funny. From deciding that nobody deserves thanks to offering vague criticism of 'the entire staff of Timson's in Norwich' and 'my friend's nephew, Sean'. Perfect.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: checkoutgirl on August 31, 2018, 08:38:19 PM
Quote
"So if anyone out there is thinking of burgling me don't bother. In fact do. Have a go because quite frankly you'll be picking up your teeth with a broken arm. Think about that before you trespass on my property. Because you people are scum."

I love Alan just confronting his audience at home, daring them to rob his house and insulting them.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Captain Z on August 31, 2018, 09:06:31 PM
I hope that I remember to say, "Can I offer you my deep, deep dismay on this very bad, bad day," next time I'm at a funeral

Hopefully the bereaved is not a Partridge fan otherwise they'll be upset at both their loss and your misquoting of despair.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: PlasticTom on August 31, 2018, 10:56:20 PM
Oh bollocks, here’s the full scene. Treat yourself.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=dMLwT1LXFAU

Alan’s response to the widows holiday plans had me cackling.

It's been a few years since I've seen that and, fuck me, every single line is gold. There is nothing wasted. I think you'd be hard pushed to find another four minutes as packed with gags and with such a great performance. Coogan's anxious smile as he wants to talk to someone else is wonderful.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on September 01, 2018, 11:18:16 AM
Hopefully the bereaved is not a Partridge fan otherwise they'll be upset at both their loss and your misquoting of despair.
You should have said, "Stop getting Partridge wrong!"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on September 05, 2018, 05:26:04 PM
In the "minor women's whiplash" scene I've always loved that Alan explains that he doesn't have whiplash because his head "was in contact with the headrest in the correct way..."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: magval on September 05, 2018, 06:58:06 PM
Horse Legend Sue Lewis
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: paruses on September 05, 2018, 07:25:46 PM
"Well, they say don't they, men are from Mars and Women are from Moon!"

Also amusing how Sidekick Simon 'corrects' him to "The Moon".
Yes - one of my favourite MMM bits. Love the way Alan jumps in and bellows "Moon" then SKS quietly corrects him and frowns. 
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: magval on September 05, 2018, 08:11:34 PM
I've just noticed, right, that when Alan walks Keith and Shona and Sue over to the Roger Moore room and Chalet plays a sort of Bond-esque brass theme, it ends with the same sting that's used when Iain Connell turns to camera in the Bond sketches in Burnistoun.

Bond!
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Terryfuckwit on September 05, 2018, 10:46:47 PM
Yes - one of my favourite MMM bits. Love the way Alan jumps in and bellows "Moon" then SKS quietly corrects him and frowns.

Yes, because hes correcting him even though its incorrect anyway
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: The Lion King on September 05, 2018, 11:13:58 PM
“All those people who say ‘life begins at forty’. They’re noticeable by their absence.”

'the nerve'
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Mobius on September 05, 2018, 11:25:07 PM
"Oddie is like a bearded Catherine wheel scything through the crowd"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Malcy on September 06, 2018, 11:12:55 AM
Partridge to the rescue!

https://metro.co.uk/2018/09/05/steve-coogan-stands-up-for-passengers-kicked-out-of-first-class-on-packed-train-7917594/
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on September 06, 2018, 11:15:24 AM
Partridge to the rescue!

https://metro.co.uk/2018/09/05/steve-coogan-stands-up-for-passengers-kicked-out-of-first-class-on-packed-train-7917594/
Needless to say, he had the last laugh. (He didn't)
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Cuellar on September 06, 2018, 11:17:21 AM
Yes, because hes correcting him even though its incorrect anyway

And then you see Sidekick Simon questioning his correction, because he realises it's wrong. He goes 'THE moon', then frowns and looks annoyed.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: paruses on September 06, 2018, 12:04:39 PM
And then you see Sidekick Simon questioning his correction, because he realises it's wrong. He goes 'THE moon', then frowns and looks annoyed.

I've heard Tim Key saying that he doesn't really do anything in the role of Sidekick Simon but he's woefully underselling himself I think. Even in that bit there's four jokes by my count.

There's so much of that reaction comedy around these days as pioneered by Tim from The Office and it's not easy to do well as you're pretty much repeating the same joke over and over again but I get such joy watching the awkward efforts of Sidekick Simon.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Lost Oliver on September 06, 2018, 12:14:39 PM
Rewatching Spinal Tap for the first time in over a decade. It struck me that the director's intro (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-qWbaZOksP4) is essentially Alan Partridge but done with a chummy American instead of a middle Englander. Lines like "I remember being knocked out by their exuberance, their raw power, and their punctuality," and even the little body language jokes like the briefly folded arms, are very easy to imagine Alan doing.

An old quote but this is such a lovely bit. so well observed and it cracks me up every time I see it. Glorious.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Elderly Sumo Prophecy on September 06, 2018, 02:35:23 PM
"Do you shave your crackling?"

Both Coogan and Davis look very close to crack(l)ing up at that line. I'd be surprised if they got it in one take.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Mobius on September 07, 2018, 12:53:03 AM
I can't remember the quote but that bit in Nomad I think where Partridge casually mentions that he didn't swim for years as a child, due to an underwater creature called Quaddy.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Cuellar on September 07, 2018, 11:59:36 AM
"A far better book is The Wild Geese, about a snatch squad of steel-hard mercenaries who rescue a black king or something, from deepest darkest Africaaa" - Mid Morning Matters, 2-2.

Love 'who rescue a black king or something', also in the delivery of it.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: magval on September 07, 2018, 12:57:04 PM
Was laughing at that on Sunday myself.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Mr. Etiquette on September 07, 2018, 04:06:41 PM
Alan on the Da Vinci Code:

“It’s like a compendium of puzzles isn’t it? But in a book.”

Just a throwaway line from a short online video promoting his biography, but very funny.
The “in a book...” gets me every time. In fact the whole short is hilarious.

“It’s almost like there’s too many...”
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: DrGreggles on September 07, 2018, 10:01:14 PM
"This is David Copperfield. Yes. He’s the American magician. You know. “I’m an American”. Yes. He claims to have made the Statue of Liberty disappear. But it’s still there. Talking out of his arse."

2 bits I love within seconds of each other.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Captain Z on September 07, 2018, 10:32:31 PM
IP:WNTTAA:
'I still see a lot of Sonja, as she's now my cleaner'

Nomad:
"I move the conversation on to things that do concern her [Lynn] - filing, replacing squeaky office chair, sacking cleaner - and hang up."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: græskar on September 07, 2018, 10:38:13 PM
I think all of "Nomad" counts as oft-forgotten gems, tbh. And they are gems.

Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Dr Rock on September 07, 2018, 10:45:46 PM
Yup just listened the audiobook again last week, was thinking 'that could go in that thread... oh that one definitely.' I was in bed though so didn't post any.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: McChesney Duntz on September 08, 2018, 04:16:54 AM
I feel compelled to share one of the very few irritating little moments in the history of AP: the moment at the start of an IAP episode where he's back-announcing the song "One of Us" - which he thinks was done by Aimee Mann rather than Joan Osbourne. Dude, the only thing you're halfway competent at is back-announcing songs on the radio. The artist's name has got to be on the disc or the cart. And don't try to make Aimee Mann culpable for that weak bit of neo-folk treacle.

Pretty much everything else he ever did is just ace.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Utter Shit on September 08, 2018, 09:19:55 AM
I think all of "Nomad" counts as oft-forgotten gems, tbh. And they are gems.

I'm not sure I know of a single bit of comedy with as constant a barrage of funny moments as the two audio books. Not Tim Vine, not Airplane. It's astonishing really, a joke pretty much every five seconda for about 12 hours (?) across the two books. I mean more or less every single line could go in here.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: magval on September 08, 2018, 11:22:11 AM
I feel compelled to share one of the very few irritating little moments in the history of AP: the moment at the start of an IAP episode where he's back-announcing the song "One of Us" - which he thinks was done by Aimee Mann rather than Joan Osbourne. Dude, the only thing you're halfway competent at is back-announcing songs on the radio. The artist's name has got to be on the disc or the cart. And don't try to make Aimee Mann culpable for that weak bit of neo-folk treacle.

Pretty much everything else he ever did is just ace.

Wherever this is, it's not in I'm Alan Partridge.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Utter Shit on September 08, 2018, 12:03:57 PM
It's in Welcome To The Places Of My Life, easy mistake to make though as the back-announcing is mainly in IAP. McChesney might have been conflating it with the Joni Mitchell chat in IAP.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: McChesney Duntz on September 08, 2018, 08:10:07 PM
You're right, it was in Welcome..., not IAP. But my (mild) irk remains.

Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Shaky on September 09, 2018, 03:34:31 AM
I'm not sure I know of a single bit of comedy with as constant a barrage of funny moments as the two audio books. Not Tim Vine, not Airplane. It's astonishing really, a joke pretty much every five seconda for about 12 hours (?) across the two books. I mean more or less every single line could go in here.

I actually much prefer Nomad to the first book. It's maybe less satisfying in a world building sense but bloody hell, the gag rate is amazing.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: BeardFaceMan on September 09, 2018, 07:36:50 AM
I think I prefer the first book because you get Alans point of view of a lot of things that happened in the sitcom, it was insightful and very funny to get his perspective on events we're already seen.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: samadriel on September 09, 2018, 08:10:03 AM
God, I loved his take on the meeting with Tony Hayes.  "While we're on the subject of cheese, it's an open secret at the BBC that you smell like cheese."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: buttgammon on September 09, 2018, 11:26:38 AM
The bit where he swings his bag around in a rage at the impressions the staff are doing of him is amazing. "The strap's optional."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Utter Shit on September 09, 2018, 03:22:04 PM
I actually much prefer Nomad to the first book. It's maybe less satisfying in a world building sense but bloody hell, the gag rate is amazing.

I'd struggle to pick between them and as BeardFaceMan says the first is better as a part of the Partridge universe, with an added layer of humour  in seeing Alan's manipulated versions of things we've already seen...but yeah I think the hit rate is better in Nomad. It's relentless.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: BeardFaceMan on September 09, 2018, 03:40:18 PM
Yeah the first book is more of a character study, you get lots of fleshed out details, new details, new slants on situations you are familiar with etc and a lot of the humour comes from that, while the second book doesnt have to do any of that as its been done and just goes for gags. Both fantastic but for different reasons. Quite amazing to think of the amount of quality material in those 2 books.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Spudgun on September 12, 2018, 03:47:45 PM
Not necessarily a gem, but taking the "Oft-forgotten" part of the thread title way more literally than intended...

How does the first episode of I'm Alan Partridge start? Every version I've seen since the original broadcast begins in the radio studio, and that includes the DVD release. But I swear I have a crystal clear memory of that first episode starting with a sort of blurry echo-y dream sequence of the end of Knowing Me, Knowing Yule, and as Tony Hayers tells Alan that he's going to make sure he never works in television again, the flashback transitions into the familiar opening. It's also part of the reason why the "It's 4:35am" reveal gets such a big laugh (and I don't think it works anywhere near as well without it).

The problem is, I couldn't find any evidence of any of the above with a quick Google. Am I going mad?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: neveragain on September 12, 2018, 04:07:51 PM
I don't remember that at all but am interested to see if anyone else does.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: magval on September 12, 2018, 04:25:48 PM
Aye, same here.

I think that the time joke works best with the assumption that the last time you saw Alan he WAS on TV. By that token, it can never again work as well as it did when it was first broadcast unless you're working through Partridge chronologically but have never ever heard of him. If you've watched any episode of that series even once, that joke is no longer a joke, it's just a statement of location.

It may be the most specifically of-its-time joke - right down to the moment, with the years that have passed in the interim - ever broadcast.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: bgmnts on September 12, 2018, 04:29:20 PM
One of my favourite ever things is (unsurprisingly) from the I Partridge audiobook. Just after he shoots Forbes Macallister.

"The health and safety man has a lot to say".

Coogan's delivery is beautiful. In fact, the mega density of laughs in those two books is mental.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: FerriswheelBueller on September 12, 2018, 04:58:28 PM
Also “knowing me, Alan Partridge, knowing you, the police - aha”

And “WHAT HAPPNS NOW?”
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: QDRPHNC on September 12, 2018, 05:08:16 PM
Not necessarily a gem, but taking the "Oft-forgotten" part of the thread title way more literally than intended...

How does the first episode of I'm Alan Partridge start? Every version I've seen since the original broadcast begins in the radio studio, and that includes the DVD release. But I swear I have a crystal clear memory of that first episode starting with a sort of blurry echo-y dream sequence of the end of Knowing Me, Knowing Yule, and as Tony Hayers tells Alan that he's going to make sure he never works in television again, the flashback transitions into the familiar opening. It's also part of the reason why the "It's 4:35am" reveal gets such a big laugh (and I don't think it works anywhere near as well without it).

The problem is, I couldn't find any evidence of any of the above with a quick Google. Am I going mad?

Sounds like a kind of "previously on..." recap that might have gone out before the original broadcast, but not part of the episode proper.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Gulftastic on September 12, 2018, 05:34:08 PM
The bit in 'I, Partridge' when he is boasting about how the kettle in his Travel Tavern room allows him to make things like pot noodles etc....but when combined with the fridge, BANG! you've got jelly.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Phil_A on September 12, 2018, 07:08:08 PM
Not necessarily a gem, but taking the "Oft-forgotten" part of the thread title way more literally than intended...

How does the first episode of I'm Alan Partridge start? Every version I've seen since the original broadcast begins in the radio studio, and that includes the DVD release. But I swear I have a crystal clear memory of that first episode starting with a sort of blurry echo-y dream sequence of the end of Knowing Me, Knowing Yule, and as Tony Hayers tells Alan that he's going to make sure he never works in television again, the flashback transitions into the familiar opening. It's also part of the reason why the "It's 4:35am" reveal gets such a big laugh (and I don't think it works anywhere near as well without it).

The problem is, I couldn't find any evidence of any of the above with a quick Google. Am I going mad?

That was the trailer for the series, wasn't it? "NEVER work on television again...NEVER...NEVER..."

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OM7TxOZYWLk
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: DrGreggles on September 12, 2018, 07:34:57 PM
Not necessarily a gem, but taking the "Oft-forgotten" part of the thread title way more literally than intended...

How does the first episode of I'm Alan Partridge start? Every version I've seen since the original broadcast begins in the radio studio, and that includes the DVD release. But I swear I have a crystal clear memory of that first episode starting with a sort of blurry echo-y dream sequence of the end of Knowing Me, Knowing Yule, and as Tony Hayers tells Alan that he's going to make sure he never works in television again, the flashback transitions into the familiar opening. It's also part of the reason why the "It's 4:35am" reveal gets such a big laugh (and I don't think it works anywhere near as well without it).

The problem is, I couldn't find any evidence of any of the above with a quick Google. Am I going mad?

You're right, that's how it was first broadcast.
It was one of the first shows I transferred from recorded-off-the-telly VHS to disc and watched that countless times before it got a proper DVD release.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Spudgun on September 12, 2018, 10:15:23 PM
You're right, that's how it was first broadcast.

Well that's a relief - thank you! Given the previous post, I was beginning to think I'd conflated the episode opening with the trailer, even though it wasn't exactly what I remembered.

Quote
It was one of the first shows I transferred from recorded-off-the-telly VHS to disc and watched that countless times before it got a proper DVD release.

I don't suppose you'd be able to share a clip of that pre-credits sequence, would you, please? Don't worry if it's not possible, but (a) I'd love to see it again, and (b) it seems to have gone completely undocumented online.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: DrGreggles on September 12, 2018, 10:32:02 PM
No idea where it is now, sadly.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Spudgun on September 12, 2018, 10:44:08 PM
No idea where it is now, sadly.

Ah, no worries - I just find it strange that this bit has been nearly completely eradicated from existence. Here's hoping someone somewhere has an original off-air recording...
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: FerriswheelBueller on September 13, 2018, 03:18:53 AM
From mid morning matters

“You’re listening to Alan Partridge. Eddie’s adenoids continue to block the vast majority of his nasal passages and he continues to smoke like a gangster in a 1940s film! ...who even the other gangsters think - smokes to excess...

Something about ‘excess’ slays me every time.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: checkoutgirl on September 20, 2018, 12:15:31 PM
From KMKYWAP radio, discussing Cyrano De Bergerac with France's second best racing driver.

Quote
I'm... not... so keen on it, I mean, I don't like what they did with the idea, they set in in the 17th century, gave him a long nose, maybe it made it a bit funnier... but, but for the British, Bergerac is John Nettles... I... I thought you ruined it really... I'm just glad you haven't got your hands on "Lovejoy"... Probably set it in the future! When, of course, antiques will be even more expensive... Not a bad idea really!
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: magval on September 20, 2018, 01:43:59 PM
That "when antiques will be even more expensive" is golden writing. I fucking love that, and the way he delivers it.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: jobotic on September 21, 2018, 11:50:35 PM
I'm watching it right now so I hope it's not cheating, but "their sex life was, for want of a better word, moribund".
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: checkoutgirl on September 24, 2018, 07:38:34 AM
Quote
I am Hans Christian Alanpartidge-Son

Quote
Warm soapy water..................it's gotta be warm
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: checkoutgirl on September 28, 2018, 06:53:16 AM
Quote
Could someone clear that shit away, please? It's just it's in my picture. People may associate it with me.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: easytarget on September 28, 2018, 07:15:47 AM
"This is David Copperfield. Yes. He’s the American magician. You know. “I’m an American”.
They should play that at the naturalization ceremony for new Americans.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: BeardFaceMan on September 28, 2018, 09:53:40 AM


That must have been an ad lib too. Did the horse shitting go out on the original broadcast?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: checkoutgirl on September 28, 2018, 02:45:42 PM
Quote
Alan: Marvelous. Marvelous. Tony, how did you do that?
Tony: Simple, Alan. The power of the paranormal.
Alan: Right. It’s not a lever or anything?
Tony: No.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Mobius on October 15, 2018, 02:18:40 AM
I've noticed 2 continuity errors in Partridge recently

1) In IAP Series 2 when Partridge introduces the song Life in Tokyo by Japan he says "It's certainly congested, I'd love to go!" But in the I, Partridge autobiography he talks about travelling to Tokyo to commentate on the Olympics and going out and drinking sake with Sally Gunnel.

2) In the Partridge movie he says he's never been in a police car but in the I, Partridge audiobook he discusses in detail being grilled by coppers on the death of Forbes McAllister and being held at the station and even given a meal. Surely the coppers would have driven him from television studios to the station?

Oh it gets dark, it gets lonely...
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: FerriswheelBueller on October 15, 2018, 04:40:09 AM
He claims to enjoy Deal or no Deal (“reason? Edmonds”) when interviewing himself in MMM and describes having a pleasant dinner with Neol and learning the secret tactic to win the gameshow.

And yet! In Nomad, he hates Neol from the outset of his career after a number of negative interactions with him in the early days. What gives?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: hermitical on October 15, 2018, 07:45:17 AM
Stop getting Partridge wrong!!!
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: popcorn on October 15, 2018, 04:53:52 PM
I think they should do another book that wraps up all the plot holes and inconsistencies. He can just say he was confused. Easy.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: FerriswheelBueller on October 15, 2018, 05:25:10 PM
There are a few instances in the books where he just says he doesn’t remember why he did something, or was just “in a bad mood” as an explanation which I think is hilarious.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on October 16, 2018, 10:27:58 PM
"Ooh, Jill you know your onions."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Dogbeard on October 17, 2018, 11:42:04 AM
Just started listening to Nomad. There's a bit where he mentions getting rubbed up the wrong way on his radio show and putting on Fairground by Simply Red, which he puts on when he wants to annoy his listeners.

The concept of him not only wanting sometimes to actively annoy his listeners, the people indirectly responsible for his livelihood, but also having a special song he reserves for this function really tickled me, and was so in line with the petty levels of malice which afflict the character.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Utter Shit on October 17, 2018, 11:49:17 AM
There are a few instances in the books where he just says he doesn’t remember why he did something, or was just “in a bad mood” as an explanation which I think is hilarious.

There's a great bit towards the end of I, Partridge where he talks in some detail about an outfit he had planned for some fancy dress thing at the radio station, only to end the anecdote by saying that he woke up on the day in a bad mood so wore his normal clothes instead. Brilliant.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Huxleys Babkins on October 17, 2018, 05:36:49 PM
Just started listening to Nomad. There's a bit where he mentions getting rubbed up the wrong way on his radio show and putting on Fairground by Simply Red, which he puts on when he wants to annoy his listeners.

The concept of him not only wanting sometimes to actively annoy his listeners, the people indirectly responsible for his livelihood, but also having a special song he reserves for this function really tickled me, and was so in line with the petty levels of malice which afflict the character.

It's also another pop at Mick Hucknall after his "beef tomato" jibe on MMM.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Cuellar on October 17, 2018, 08:55:30 PM
Can't remember the context but he's talking about Nelson (possibly in Simply The Best of Norfolk in MMM) and describes him as being shot(?) and then 'subsequently kissed'.

Love it.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: FerriswheelBueller on October 17, 2018, 10:53:47 PM
There's a great bit towards the end of I, Partridge where he talks in some detail about an outfit he had planned for some fancy dress thing at the radio station, only to end the anecdote by saying that he woke up on the day in a bad mood so wore his normal clothes instead. Brilliant.

“There were other reasons why spending Christmas on your own is great, but I can’t think of them right now”
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Ja'moke on October 18, 2018, 12:48:04 AM
I've been relistening to Nomad and the whole segment about Bill Oddie joining him briefly on his walk, and Bill's bird phone (a special phone he uses only to receive updates on rare bird sightings), is ace.

The bit that cracked me up the most was when he revealed Bill hadn't spoken to him in hours, ever since Alan referred to seagulls as "the jackals of the sky," to which he adds "I don't even know what I meant."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Chollis on October 18, 2018, 10:05:40 AM
I could really do with some audio Partridge while at work. Shall I just listen to the audiobooks again?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Utter Shit on October 18, 2018, 10:08:16 AM
I'd massively recommend this interview with Richard Bacon if you haven't heard it - there is a small amount of crossover with the first book (the interview was promoting I, Partridge) but it's mostly original stuff and really, really good.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n7NHIHupjNs

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gq158jRnFN0
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: gmoney on October 18, 2018, 11:13:22 AM
Alan on the advantages of spending Christmas alone.

"That year I had a glass of beer at 10AM! Imagine that. A glass of beer and a piece of toast on Christmas morn. I didn't finish it - it was horrible"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Cuellar on October 18, 2018, 11:22:35 AM
The whole section on Christmas and Knowing Me Knowing Yule is fantastic.

The 'Christmas Crackers, and Mick Hucknall, because he was, in his words, trying to bang one of them' - the way he says 'trying to bang one of them' had me in fits.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Captain Z on October 18, 2018, 11:27:28 AM
What other snippets of audio-only Partridge exist? Not including On The Hour, KMKYWAP and the books. It would be nice to have them all in a compilation.

The Day Today DVD 'conspiracy theories' clip
Richard Bacon Interview
Radio 4 Inheritance Tracks

...?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Jobey on October 18, 2018, 11:58:03 AM
I'd massively recommend this interview with Richard Bacon if you haven't heard it - there is a small amount of crossover with the first book (the interview was promoting I, Partridge) but it's mostly original stuff and really, really good.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n7NHIHupjNs

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gq158jRnFN0

10 on 10
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: BeardFaceMan on October 18, 2018, 02:30:00 PM
What other snippets of audio-only Partridge exist? Not including On The Hour, KMKYWAP and the books. It would be nice to have them all in a compilation.

The Day Today DVD 'conspiracy theories' clip
Richard Bacon Interview
Radio 4 Inheritance Tracks

...?

I did something like this recently. Cut out all the Partridge bits from OTH, got the IAP and KMKY commentaries, a bootleg audience recording from series 2 of IAP, TDT audio chats, loads of radio interviews, celeb interviews, I made some mp3s of videos like the Clive Anderson interview and Comic Relief segments too so I could bung them on my mp3 player. I'll upload them somewhere.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Captain Z on October 18, 2018, 02:32:56 PM
Yes please, that would be great. Partridge audio is the most effective thing to fall asleep to (in the nicest possible way).
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Utter Shit on October 18, 2018, 02:34:15 PM
Sounds great I'd love that download.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: BeardFaceMan on October 18, 2018, 02:51:57 PM
Here's the full list to keep you moist until later -

I'm Alan Partridge - Series 1 - TV Commentaries                       
I'm Alan Partridge - Series 2 - TV Commentaries                       
I'm Alan Partridge Series 2 Bootleg (24.05.02)                       
Knowing Me, Knowing You - TV Commentaries                             
On The Hour - Series 1 - Alan Partridge                               
On The Hour - Series 2 - Alan Partridge                               
The Day Today DVD Extras                                             
Alan Partridge - Alpha Papa - Commentary.mp3                         
Alan Partridge - BAFTA Tech Awards 1994.mp3                           
Alan Partridge - Brit Awards.mp3                                     
Alan Partridge - British Comedy Awards 2000 (Elton John).mp3         
Alan Partridge - Comic Relief 2005 (The Milky Bar Kid).mp3           
Alan Partridge - Comic Relief 2017.mp3                               
Alan Partridge - Inheritance Tracks.mp3                               
Alan Partridge - Interviewed by Clive Anderson.mp3                   
Alan Partridge - Jonathan Ross 2011.mp3                               
Alan Partridge - Live From The Lighthouse (Simon Pegg and Noel Gallagher).mp3                     
Alan Partridge - Message To The Irish (Alpha Papa).mp3               
Alan Partridge - On Free Speech.mp3                                   
Alan Partridge - On The Royal Baby.mp3                               
Alan Partridge - Publisher's Office.mp3                               
Alan Partridge - Radio 4 Today with Will Gompertz.mp3                 
Alan Partridge - Richard Bacon Interview (5 Live 2011 Oct 06).mp3     
Alan Partridge - Roger Daltery Interview.mp3                         
Alan Partridge - Sport Relief 2016.mp3                               
Alan Partridge - The Big Snog 1996 (& Pauline Calf).mp3               
Alan Partridge - The Election Night Armistice.mp3                     
Alan Partridge - The Man Who Thinks He's It.mp3                       
On The Hour - Newsbanger - Alan Partridge.mp3   

Just realised the stand up from the ...Other Less Successful Characters tour isnt there. Probably have to PM for the link to this too, theres some commercially available stuff in there.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: QDRPHNC on October 18, 2018, 05:15:05 PM
I've often thought about trimming MMM into an audio-only format, make it sound like an actual radio show. You'd some of the good behind-the-scenes stuff tho.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: hermitical on October 18, 2018, 06:13:56 PM
+1 for the link as and when etc
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: magval on October 18, 2018, 06:50:55 PM

I'm Alan Partridge Series 2 Bootleg (24.05.02)                       


What's this?

Edit: Didn't occur to me to look up
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Malcy on October 18, 2018, 07:01:47 PM
Brilliant stuff. Looking forward to hearing that bootleg!
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: BeardFaceMan on October 18, 2018, 08:08:38 PM
Can't even remember where I got the bootleg from, probably Soulseek back when IAP S2 was being broadcast. There's a text file that says -

The following clips are from a bootleg recording of the studio session for Show 2 of the second series of I'm Alan Partridge. The full bootleg covers the first 75 minutes of the session. This yielded the first eight minutes of the edited show! This page features streamable Flash audios of the various set-ups and takes in real time so you can hear how it's done. We've not bothered including most of Gordon Southern's between-takes warm-up stuff because, well, that would just be ridiculous.
 
Clip 1 - 6'50"
Gordon Southern's initial warm-up. "You've got to laugh your heads off", he says. So blame him... Line Producer Adam Tandy can be heard towards the end.

Clip 2 - 3'52"
Radio Norwich: played in on VT. Contains lots of extra dialogue cut from transmission.
 
Clip 3 - 4'13"
Steve Coogan in character as Alan Partridge introduces himself and co-characters Lynne, Michael and Sonia to the audience.
 
Clip 4 - 6'17"
Alan's House: first take. Some extra dialogue, alternate lines, fluffed delivery and prompting from Tandy. Problems occur as Michael enters.

Clip 5 - 11'43"
Alan's House: a retake of the entire scene and a few takes of the 'walk-through' to the Static Home.

Clip 6 - 5'13"
Static Home: first take. Some extra dialogue. Odd repeated fluffs towards the end.

Clip 7 - 6'13"
Static Home: various retakes, jamming around the script a bit. The retake of Michael's 'shagging' mime gets halted, to the audience's amused dismay.

Clip 8 - 3'52"
Static Home: more retakes. Michael's mime retaken.

Clip 9 - 1'34"
Alan's House - Sonia and the builders: First take, which doesn't get very far.

Clip 10 - 3'33"
Alan's House - Sonia and the builders: second take, far more substantial. Features lots of unused dialogue.

Clip 11 - 1'08"
Security check / Book signing: played in on VT. Features unused dialogue. There would have been more but the Minidisc died...


Link is ready to go so probably best to send me PMs if you want it.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Huxleys Babkins on October 18, 2018, 09:00:37 PM
I've often thought about trimming MMM into an audio-only format, make it sound like an actual radio show. You'd some of the good behind-the-scenes stuff tho.

There was an iPhone app called Radio Alan which was along those lines. You could feed it a playlist and you’d essentially have a looping radio show with Alan presenting your music. It would also recognise if you had any of the tracks he introduced in the series and played that link before it played.

Was taken down from the store ages ago though. Shame.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Maurice Yeatman on October 18, 2018, 09:42:22 PM
Coogan as Partridge did three messages for AOL way back in the day. I wish I'd saved them.

From memory, the first one was when you connected to AOL: Welcome to AOL! You're connected. The 'you're connected' was said with a bit of a chuckle in his voice.
Second one was an email alert: You've got mail... so, read it.
Third was when logging off: That's it... goodbye.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Nice Relaxing Poo on October 19, 2018, 04:06:27 PM
Coogan as Partridge did three messages for AOL way back in the day. I wish I'd saved them.

From memory, the first one was when you connected to AOL: Welcome to AOL! You're connected. The 'you're connected' was said with a bit of a chuckle in his voice.
Second one was an email alert: You've got mail... so, read it.
Third was when logging off: That's it... goodbye.


Yeah I had those. It made the pain of being with AOL somewhat les.......nah who am I kidding, they were utter shit.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Chollis on October 19, 2018, 04:18:46 PM
I'd massively recommend this interview with Richard Bacon if you haven't heard it - there is a small amount of crossover with the first book (the interview was promoting I, Partridge) but it's mostly original stuff and really, really good.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n7NHIHupjNs

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gq158jRnFN0

Wonderful, thanks.

Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: BeardFaceMan on October 19, 2018, 05:20:04 PM
PMs are all out now, apart from someone who emailed me directly with an old email address that didnt work when I replied, so if that was you who sent an email and didnt get a reply, send me a PM here instead. Enjoy!
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Utter Shit on October 19, 2018, 10:15:35 PM
Sent a PM BeardFaceMan, nice one.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Oliver Mardy on October 22, 2018, 01:25:32 AM
MMM when the call-in topic is things you wouldn't do for love (based on the Meatloaf song). There's some quick one-line responses from various callers, but I love the tone of voice of the characters who say these:
"Give kidney."
"Renounce Christ."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: DrGreggles on October 22, 2018, 09:00:11 AM
Can't even remember where I got the bootleg from, probably Soulseek back when IAP S2 was being broadcast. There's a text file that says -

The following clips are from a bootleg recording of the studio session for Show 2 of the second series of I'm Alan Partridge. The full bootleg covers the first 75 minutes of the session. This yielded the first eight minutes of the edited show! This page features streamable Flash audios of the various set-ups and takes in real time so you can hear how it's done. We've not bothered including most of Gordon Southern's between-takes warm-up stuff because, well, that would just be ridiculous.
 
Clip 1 - 6'50"
Gordon Southern's initial warm-up. "You've got to laugh your heads off", he says. So blame him... Line Producer Adam Tandy can be heard towards the end.

Clip 2 - 3'52"
Radio Norwich: played in on VT. Contains lots of extra dialogue cut from transmission.
 
Clip 3 - 4'13"
Steve Coogan in character as Alan Partridge introduces himself and co-characters Lynne, Michael and Sonia to the audience.
 
Clip 4 - 6'17"
Alan's House: first take. Some extra dialogue, alternate lines, fluffed delivery and prompting from Tandy. Problems occur as Michael enters.

Clip 5 - 11'43"
Alan's House: a retake of the entire scene and a few takes of the 'walk-through' to the Static Home.

Clip 6 - 5'13"
Static Home: first take. Some extra dialogue. Odd repeated fluffs towards the end.

Clip 7 - 6'13"
Static Home: various retakes, jamming around the script a bit. The retake of Michael's 'shagging' mime gets halted, to the audience's amused dismay.

Clip 8 - 3'52"
Static Home: more retakes. Michael's mime retaken.

Clip 9 - 1'34"
Alan's House - Sonia and the builders: First take, which doesn't get very far.

Clip 10 - 3'33"
Alan's House - Sonia and the builders: second take, far more substantial. Features lots of unused dialogue.

Clip 11 - 1'08"
Security check / Book signing: played in on VT. Features unused dialogue. There would have been more but the Minidisc died...


Link is ready to go so probably best to send me PMs if you want it.

Thanks
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: rm2kmaster on October 22, 2018, 10:17:47 AM
Alan on the advantages of spending Christmas alone.

"That year I had a glass of beer at 10AM! Imagine that. A glass of beer and a piece of toast on Christmas morn. I didn't finish it - it was horrible"

"I chortled when I thought of what the ball and chain have said. Stupid cow"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Shoulders?-Stomach! on October 22, 2018, 01:29:51 PM
Discussing someone's recovery from alcohol in I, Partridge

"I'm pleased to say he's barely touched a drop! apart from wine"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Shoulders?-Stomach! on October 22, 2018, 01:31:55 PM
"Well Gary Newbon went spastic, tore off his jacket, ripped his shirt off, pounding at his belly and tits, shouting 'Come on then, come on then'"

"You could see Gary behind the camera, slumped in his chair, covered in tears, but needless to say: I had the last laugh."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Shoulders?-Stomach! on October 22, 2018, 01:32:45 PM
"Join the fucking queue mate, I said- with my eyes."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: gmoney on October 22, 2018, 02:00:17 PM
"Pounding at his belly and tits"

Such a fantastic bit of phrasing.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Ja'moke on October 22, 2018, 02:17:00 PM
The section on Gatwick airport in Nomad:

"It's the London airport it's okay to like. Stansted, or Stanstead, or Standstead, or Standsted as it's variously known, is an arrogant upstart. City Aiport? Full of bankers. London Luton isn't in London and is barely in Luton; and Heathrow is just an absolute tit of an airport. No, Gatwick is the place to be."

The way he says tit makes it.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: rm2kmaster on October 23, 2018, 03:19:58 PM
"It's funny that she's called Sue Cook when she can't cook, but she will sue."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Utter Shit on October 23, 2018, 03:25:30 PM
The section on Gatwick airport in Nomad:

"It's the London airport it's okay to like. Stansted, or Stanstead, or Standstead, or Standsted as it's variously known, is an arrogant upstart. City Aiport? Full of bankers. London Luton isn't in London and is barely in Luton; and Heathrow is just an absolute tit of an airport. No, Gatwick is the place to be."

The way he says tit makes it.

Can't remember who it is, but his line about a fellow minor celeb spotting him and going "FUCK ARE YOU DOING HERE?"...Christ that is good.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: rm2kmaster on October 23, 2018, 03:27:11 PM
Can't remember who it is, but his line about a fellow minor celeb spotting him and going "FUCK ARE YOU DOING HERE?"...Christ that is good.

Nick Knowles
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Cuellar on October 23, 2018, 03:33:43 PM
He really is the go to celeb for evoking...something slightly desolate. C.f. Athletic Mince and the Beardsley Tales.

NICK KNOWLES!
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: QDRPHNC on October 23, 2018, 03:47:06 PM
I think The Gatwick Candidate might be my favourite chapter in Nomad, just the perfect mix of funny and bleak.

Although the end of the preceding chapter needs to be mentioned, when he walks 160 miles out of his way to visit the agent at home and then he's not in... "That's fine!"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Cuellar on October 23, 2018, 03:49:41 PM
Describing a booze influenced sleep as 'grolschy' is an excellent way of putting it.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: FerriswheelBueller on October 23, 2018, 04:20:51 PM
Nick Knowles

“PLANT ONE ON HIM, KNOWLESY! LAY ‘IM OUT!” But Knowles didn’t plant one on him. He pretended not to know me, and sauntered off.

Or something.

I also like that the line about him not presenting “D.I.Y S.O.S unless he was S.L.O.S.H.E.D (sloshed).”

Edit to stop getting Partridge wrong.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Ja'moke on October 23, 2018, 04:22:44 PM
Nick Knowles

"He's a big man with a craggy face and an ease among labourers and tradesmen that suggests, if the mood took him, he could summon them like Tarzan summons the animals and have them take you to pieces, violence-wise."

I also like that the line about him not presenting “D.I.Y S.O.S unless he was P.I.S.S.E.D: pissed

It's actually S.L.O.S.H.E.D (sloshed). Which is even funnier.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: FerriswheelBueller on October 23, 2018, 05:35:02 PM
It's actually S.L.O.S.H.E.D (sloshed). Which is even funnier.

I stand corrected (said the man in the orthopaedic shoes)
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Captain Z on October 23, 2018, 05:44:23 PM
It's actually "D.I.Y.S.L.O.S.H.E.D. (sloshed)"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: FerriswheelBueller on October 23, 2018, 06:13:41 PM
I’m so ashamed of getting this wrong, twice.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Terryfuckwit on October 23, 2018, 11:57:10 PM
"It's funny that she's called Sue Cook when she can't cook, but she will sue."

Brilliant.

'Bladacker' - when he's nervous on Live TV
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Enzo on October 24, 2018, 02:17:00 AM
The section on Gatwick airport in Nomad:

"It's the London airport it's okay to like. Stansted, or Stanstead, or Standstead, or Standsted as it's variously known, is an arrogant upstart. City Aiport? Full of bankers. London Luton isn't in London and is barely in Luton; and Heathrow is just an absolute tit of an airport. No, Gatwick is the place to be."

The way he says tit makes it.

Also in Anglian lives he says his favourite place in the world is Gatwick Village.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: New Jack on October 24, 2018, 09:40:13 AM
"The Eighties', delivered in a way to, somehow, make  the decade sound like it's scary
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: magval on October 24, 2018, 10:49:37 AM
Did anyone mention the way he says "nestle" instead of Ness-lay when he's talking to the Milky Bar Kid? Cause that's funny.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: DrGreggles on October 24, 2018, 11:03:36 AM
Did anyone mention the way he says "nestle" instead of Ness-lay when he's talking to the Milky Bar Kid? Cause that's funny.

But it IS "Nessels" and not "Nesslay", as per the original Milky Bar jingle!
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: magval on October 24, 2018, 12:37:42 PM
Ah shite. As always, context and explanation have made a thing much less funny than its face-value appropriation.

Thanks* Dr Greggles

*FOR NOTHING
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Utter Shit on October 24, 2018, 12:39:43 PM
Listening to those IAP commentaries now, there are some fantastic lines throughout. At one point Alan says that he didn't include Denise and Fernando in the show (in case you don't know, the commentaries suggest that IAP is a dramatic re-enactment of real events) because he "didn't want to give them the oxygen of publicity".
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: DrGreggles on October 24, 2018, 01:32:30 PM
Ah shite. As always, context and explanation have made a thing much less funny than its face-value appropriation.

Thanks* Dr Greggles

*FOR NOTHING

(https://www.melubabadges.com/image/cache/data/product_images/stock%20badges/stock_large_here_to_help_white-750x750.png)
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: gilbertharding on October 24, 2018, 02:36:28 PM
But it IS "Nessels" and not "Nesslay", as per the original Milky Bar jingle!

It WAS pronounced 'Nessels', in Britain. They went along with our inability to cope with foreign language for quite a while. I reckon the 80s was when they decided to put their foot down. Around the same time they (the same people) decided the small black coffee was definitely eSSpresso and not eXpresso, and only common people ate in 'Kaffs'.

There's something funny about persisting in calling it Nessels though.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Chollis on October 25, 2018, 10:18:26 PM
"i haven't been this angry since the 9/11 debacle"
perfect
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: DoesNotFollow on October 27, 2018, 04:08:39 PM
"Over Maxwell's there was a painting of a topless female biker, her hair flailing in the wind, her nipples standing to attention like a couple of boob soldiers".

From I, Partridge. Listening to Nomad for the second time today (was underwhelmed first time round but am enjoying it much more now) and any time Alan says "sandwiches" is also joyous.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on October 28, 2018, 12:46:27 PM
"I like a man who knows who he is."
"I'm Alan Partridge. Carry on."

Also includes the great lines:
"Who's Montgomery?"
"The man who masterminded the battle of El-Alamain."

"I thought you were sexy. I don't now, you're a bloke. I've a good mind to knock your block off!"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: FerriswheelBueller on October 28, 2018, 12:49:20 PM
“You’re sexy... but I don’t trust you!”
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: QDRPHNC on October 29, 2018, 05:43:20 PM
I was thinking the other day that, as brilliant at the books / audiobooks are, they would be improved slightly by being just a touch less on-the-nose in some circumstances.

The one quote that jumped out at me was when he's talking about the military in I Partridge, and it's something alongs the lines of, "whether they're [doing something heroic] or [doing something heroic] or making pyramids out of prisoners, those guys are all heroes."

Which is funny, but too knowing and subversive to be realistically Alan.

Darkplace steps over that line too, although much more often. It gets a laugh, but at the price of it's own internal integrity.

Edit: While I'm here, "They're not dirty, they're unwashed. Big difference, sweetheart."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: FerriswheelBueller on October 29, 2018, 06:44:00 PM
“Braver than ten firemen... or a dozen policemen”
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Ja'moke on October 29, 2018, 11:29:27 PM
Edit: While I'm here, "They're not dirty, they're unwashed. Big difference, sweetheart."

That part is hilarious. When he’s trying to tell them to put the Sport Relief banner down but they can’t understand what he’s saying, and so he tries to tell them in a friendlier manner: “Get rid of the banner. Now.”
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Tony Yeboah on October 29, 2018, 11:39:37 PM
It WAS pronounced 'Nessels', in Britain. They went along with our inability to cope with foreign language for quite a while. I reckon the 80s was when they decided to put their foot down. Around the same time they (the same people) decided the small black coffee was definitely eSSpresso and not eXpresso, and only common people ate in 'Kaffs'.

There's something funny about persisting in calling it Nessels though.
Why do they have to change things? It's not Scope, it's The Spastics Society.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on November 01, 2018, 06:38:00 AM
Pipped at the post by Dave Lee Travis. Again.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on November 01, 2018, 06:43:11 AM
Idea for film extravaganza, plot thus: Malcolm MacDowell is trapped in the future. He’s being pursued by a cyber-punk from the past. Played by Rutger Hauer.

Erm, terrible idea, no one will watch that. I’ve not thought it through Lynn; I’ll call you back
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: QDRPHNC on November 05, 2018, 02:26:56 PM
"To be fair to myself for a change..."

You could put that on Alan's tombstone.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: ASFTSN on November 05, 2018, 02:42:12 PM
Nick Knowles

The whole section with Knowles is gold. Alan frankly admitting he's scared of him. And describing his voice as (paraphrasing here) "a guttural OI-OI-OI that insinuates 'I will do violence upon' you" had me laughing on public transport like a complete loon.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: c on November 05, 2018, 02:46:28 PM
"have you always been autistic?"


https://www.mirror.co.uk/tv/tv-news/richard-madeleys-shocking-comments-autism-13523103
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Fambo Number Mive on November 05, 2018, 03:05:43 PM
Sorry, I wrote "nm" but I meant never mind about what I had posted, not never mind about what Madeley said.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: BeardFaceMan on November 06, 2018, 07:44:14 AM
For anyone who has the link, I just put the stand up bit from the Other Less Successful Characters tour into the folder of Partridge stuff, I think that's the last of what I have.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Captain Z on November 06, 2018, 05:10:01 PM
You know that phrase "if you love someone, set them free"? I've always like the sound of that, even if it's logic is plainly horseshit... instead, I've adapted it slightly to read "if you don't love someone, and don't want to hang around with them any more, set them free". It just makes more sense.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: græskar on November 06, 2018, 09:27:48 PM
Idea for film extravaganza, plot thus: Malcolm MacDowell is trapped in the future. He’s being pursued by a cyber-punk from the past. Played by Rutger Hauer.

Erm, terrible idea, no one will watch that. I’ve not thought it through Lynn; I’ll call you back

I'm going nowhere Lynn. Quite literally, I'm on the ring road. Third time round.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on November 07, 2018, 06:23:41 AM
"Ooh, Jill you know your onions."
I'm quoting myself here. Whilst the line I picked is funny, on reflection the key line is, "Oh, Jill, that is first class."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: wooders1978 on November 07, 2018, 07:26:12 AM
Dave Clifton: I’m having some friends over for dinner tonight
Alan: oh dear, Jonny walker and jack Daniels? Or errr, Glen morangie?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on November 07, 2018, 07:48:28 AM
Anyway, he thanks her for that stolen afternoon. But even then it was stolen, it’s not your property love, You’ve got to give it back. So just to re-emphasize one more time. Her contract has been terminated.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Avril Lavigne on November 07, 2018, 01:50:29 PM
There's a probably a more appropriate thread for this question as it's not about a 'gem', but can anyone explain to me what's going on with Partridge saying to Lynn "That's why I'm talking... talking... that's why I'm talking...?" and doing a weird thing with his mouth, when they're sitting in his car in Basic Alan from IAP Series 1?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: QDRPHNC on November 07, 2018, 02:36:45 PM
There's a probably a more appropriate thread for this question as it's not about a 'gem', but can anyone explain to me what's going on with Partridge saying to Lynn "That's why I'm talking... talking... that's why I'm talking...?" and doing a weird thing with his mouth, when they're sitting in his car in Basic Alan from IAP Series 1?

I think because he's bored beyond belief and staring into the abyss of his own poor life choices.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: marquis_de_sad on November 07, 2018, 02:46:58 PM
Agreed
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Cuellar on November 07, 2018, 02:54:13 PM
I always thought his ears had popped, or something made his own voice sound different for a second, so he was trying to recreate it and see what was going on.

Dunno why I think this, but I've always held it as gospel truth.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Maurice Yeatman on November 07, 2018, 03:10:24 PM
For anyone who has the link, I just put the stand up bit from the Other Less Successful Characters tour into the folder of Partridge stuff, I think that's the last of what I have.

Only just spotted that. Thanks for the bonus.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Avril Lavigne on November 07, 2018, 03:12:42 PM
I always thought his ears had popped, or something made his own voice sound different for a second, so he was trying to recreate it and see what was going on.

Dunno why I think this, but I've always held it as gospel truth.

Well when he's saying it he also briefly leans over close to Lynn at the end, then leans back and shrugs with his hands up. It's very odd.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Utter Shit on November 07, 2018, 03:21:32 PM
I always just took it as tying in with Alan's general boredom that day, he's got so little to do that he starts noticing little weirdnesses in himself; he heard his own voice, thought it sounded odd and repeated it just to check.

That sounds fucking mental written down.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Twed on November 07, 2018, 03:26:56 PM
I think he was searching for the right word. "Talking... talking... bollocks?" and leaning into Lynn for a suggestion. In the end he comes up with nothing and shrugs.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Oliver Mardy on November 07, 2018, 03:29:27 PM
For anyone who has the link, I just put the stand up bit from the Other Less Successful Characters tour into the folder of Partridge stuff, I think that's the last of what I have.

I do not have the link. I had not heard of the link until now. I want the link. Please link me.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: marquis_de_sad on November 07, 2018, 04:47:01 PM
I always just took it as tying in with Alan's general boredom that day, he's got so little to do that he starts noticing little weirdnesses in himself; he heard his own voice, thought it sounded odd and repeated it just to check.

Agreed again
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: imitationleather on November 07, 2018, 05:02:27 PM
I always just took it as tying in with Alan's general boredom that day, he's got so little to do that he starts noticing little weirdnesses in himself; he heard his own voice, thought it sounded odd and repeated it just to check.

That sounds fucking mental written down.

This is how I always saw it. I think I've even ended up doing similar things myself while very bored.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: hermitical on November 07, 2018, 06:12:46 PM
Yeah, it's boredom I reckon.

Isn't that the day he goes for a walk to the petrol station as well to fill the void time. A man with an empty life, Lynne being forced to endure it with him as he's talking, t-al-k-i-n-g
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: magval on November 07, 2018, 07:29:47 PM
It's also possibly because the scene was improvised (as seen in the 10-minute version on the DVD), and it doesn't really mean anything, it's just Coogan being funny (like that face he makes walking round Tandys or when he does the "brainwaves" sound effect). It's just amusing goofiness.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: QDRPHNC on November 07, 2018, 11:04:38 PM
yes yes yes yes Yes Yes YES YES YES YES


THAT... was a GOALLLLLLLLL
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Chollis on November 08, 2018, 12:04:35 AM
yes yes yes yes Yes Yes YES YES YES YES


THAT... was a GOALLLLLLLLL

"And another!" is my favourite line from that
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Maurice Yeatman on November 08, 2018, 12:37:03 AM
If we still had karma I wouldn't risk pointing out that he really does say Striker and not Thriker, as amusing as that joke is.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Huxleys Babkins on November 08, 2018, 08:01:02 AM
"And another!" is my favourite line from that

My head-canon has him spending the next five minutes of commentary trying to understand why the second goal hasn’t been allowed.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Yussef Dent on November 08, 2018, 10:21:56 AM
"No, definitely out. It just goes to show you that computers can go wrong. Anyone who has seen 2001: A Space Oddity will know that, when HAL refused to open the pod door."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Tikwid on November 13, 2018, 11:19:06 PM
Maybe mentioned before, but the faces Alan makes whenever Mike Samson is out of eyeshot:
(https://i.imgur.com/dmRgCSJ.png)
(https://i.imgur.com/CHlHK5M.png)
(https://i.imgur.com/iTace1e.png)
"Unbelievable."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Paul Calf on November 14, 2018, 10:11:50 AM
I think chances are the writers just went with the broad strokes for the easy gag of Alan thinking Holmes is real. Same as "The Best of the Beatles" - it doesn't matter that it doesn't exist...

Sorry to pull this one back from the dead, but the joke here is more subtle and considered than someone without Coogan’s obsessive knowledge of music history might realise.

The album “Best Of the Beatles” was actually released by Pete Best, who was the original drummer and left the band in 1962. The bottom layer of the joke is that the album is a shameless cash-in and contains no original Beatles material.

https://www.discogs.com/Pete-Best-Best-Of-The-Beatles/release/4848805

The very nearly amusing irony is that he probably was the best drummer in The Beatles.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: New Jack on November 14, 2018, 10:15:25 AM
Sorry to pull this one back from the dead, but the joke here is more subtle and considered than someone without Coogan’s obsessive knowledge of music history might realise.

The album “Best Of the Beatles” was actually released by Pete Best, who was the original drummer and left the band in 1962. The bottom layer of the joke is that the album is a shameless cash-in and contains no original Beatles material.

https://www.discogs.com/Pete-Best-Best-Of-The-Beatles/release/4848805

The very nearly amusing irony is that he probably was the best drummer in The Beatles.

I said this back then thinking it was a multilayered joke and got shouted down for various reasons, possibly the most convincing to me being Alan using The Best, but the actual irl album is simply Best of the Beatles

But still. What we are hearing is the better joke, isn't it?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Utter Shit on November 14, 2018, 10:16:36 AM
That's a good spot Paul Calf...but it's a bit annoying if you're right, because IMO the idea of Alan's favourite Beatles album being a generic compilation album is both funnier and more true to the character than him being a huge fan of a little-known curio with a tangential relationship to the band.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: New Jack on November 14, 2018, 10:19:40 AM
I think Alan certainly meant it as a compilation, but the writers intended the Pete Best layer!
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: jobotic on November 14, 2018, 10:29:44 AM
That's a good spot Paul Calf...but it's a bit annoying if you're right, because IMO the idea of Alan's favourite Beatles album being a generic compilation album is both funnier and more true to the character than him being a huge fan of a little-known curio with a tangential relationship to the band.

It also doesn't rely on the audience knowing about a little known curio, which I certainly didn't.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Shaky on November 14, 2018, 11:43:28 AM
Jesus Christ. The joke is that Alan, local DJ, only likes a Best Of compilation. That's it.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: New Jack on November 14, 2018, 12:44:15 PM
A non existent compilation, as he's blagging
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: gilbertharding on November 14, 2018, 03:48:36 PM
Don't know if they're 'oft forgotten', but to me any slightly modern wc is always 'Buck Rogers' toilet', a toilet with an inefficient flush has me thinking of 'half a pound of mashed up Dundee cake'.

The idea of deaf offenders also floats to the top of my mind with worrying frequency.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: QDRPHNC on November 14, 2018, 08:07:06 PM
Jesus Christ. The joke is that Alan, local DJ, only likes a Best Of compilation. That's it.

Nothing to add, but this bears repeating.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: FerriswheelBueller on November 14, 2018, 09:51:57 PM
Nothing to add, but this bears repeating.

No, he’s making a cryptic reference to former Beatles drummer Pete Best and his obscure 1962 record. Also, if you watch at the exact moment he gives the line, Alan makes an Illuminati hand signal synonymous with believers of the “Paul is dead” conspiracy. Additionally the entire episode synchs up perfectly to side A of Hard Day’s Night.

Coincidence? I think not - clearly this is a multilayered joke that requires further analysis.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Malcy on November 15, 2018, 12:16:54 AM
'Laurence Llewellyn Bowen, he's a sort of Adam Ant for Daily Mail readers'.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Mobius on November 15, 2018, 12:24:55 AM
Rayne Wooney, top one!
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Captain Z on November 15, 2018, 12:43:16 AM
with his wife, or a sexy hooker...
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Mobius on November 15, 2018, 12:47:19 AM
Well Gary Newbon went spastic
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: rm2kmaster on November 15, 2018, 08:21:01 AM
'Pounding at his belly and tits'
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Chollis on November 15, 2018, 10:25:04 AM
I love how he uses tits for men
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: MoonDust on November 17, 2018, 10:04:28 AM
Might have mentioned this one before but on the subject of subtlety and allowing the laughs to come from your own imagination, one of the shortest and sweetest lines is when that teacher notices a chalk penis on his back and comes back to the garage, and Alan asks Michael to protect him.

"I cannae hit customers, Alan. I've been told."

It's the "I've been told" that makes it. The implications of that line. Has he hit a customer before? Has he nearly hit a customer before? It's so Michael that he would have to be told he can't hit customers, rather than such a rule being basic common sense.

Brilliant.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: FerriswheelBueller on November 18, 2018, 06:00:27 PM
The little pause in the middle of the Dante Fires speech:

“I was going to give out some awards but... that’s not going to happen”

Also the resignation in:

“Don’t shine a torch in my face, mate.”
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Avril Lavigne on November 18, 2018, 06:30:33 PM
I had Alan's "cheer up me old mmMate" from this scene pop into my head earlier and was reminded how much I enjoy any instances of him forcibly trying to sound laid-back/easygoing.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wYAzK0utwes
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on November 18, 2018, 06:50:36 PM
The little pause in the middle of the Dante Fires speech:

“I was going to give out some awards but... that’s not going to happen”

Also the resignation in:

“Don’t shine a torch in my face, mate.”
All part of probably the greatest 10 minutes in sit com history, and I realise how hyperbolic that sounds.

Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Captain Z on November 18, 2018, 08:20:36 PM
Come on Pete, back on your feet you can catch up with them... no... no, he can't be bothered.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: notjosh on November 18, 2018, 08:47:00 PM
Listening to those IAP commentaries now, there are some fantastic lines throughout. At one point Alan says that he didn't include Denise and Fernando in the show (in case you don't know, the commentaries suggest that IAP is a dramatic re-enactment of real events) because he "didn't want to give them the oxygen of publicity".

Are these really worth listening to? I managed about 2 minutes of episode one when the DVD first came out, but found the premise too strange to continue. One thing that makes Partridge such an amazing character is that, for the large part, the continuity has been strictly maintained for the last 25 years, and I don't want to see/hear anything that steps on that.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: DrGreggles on November 18, 2018, 08:51:23 PM
I tried and failed on the Partridge commentaries. Bailed during episode 1.
The only 'in character' one I can think of that was worthwhile was for This Is Spinal Tap.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Utter Shit on November 18, 2018, 09:15:50 PM
Are these really worth listening to? I managed about 2 minutes of episode one when the DVD first came out, but found the premise too strange to continue. One thing that makes Partridge such an amazing character is that, for the large part, the continuity has been strictly maintained for the last 25 years, and I don't want to see/hear anything that steps on that.

It is way below the level of most Partridge stuff but there are a few nuggets of gold and it mostly sticks to canon IIRC. Worth a go if you're desperate for fresh Partridge.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: BeardFaceMan on November 18, 2018, 09:18:43 PM
Felicity Montague is a great actress but shes clearly not an improviser. She and Coogan have always worked together on the screen but theres seems to be no chemistry at all in those in character commentaries, theyre a bit of a struggle to get through.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: The Lurker on November 20, 2018, 11:49:39 PM
"Alright, what's his book like? I don't know your name!"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Kryton on November 21, 2018, 12:30:21 AM
'But what lovely butter'. (MMM)
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: robhug on November 28, 2018, 01:03:32 PM
“Seve Ballesteros, The Bullfighter. Although he’s technically a golfer. What do you get if you cross a ballerina and a bastard? Ballesteros. If you analyse it Seve combines the qualities of both those animals, the lithe nimbleness of a ballerina combined with the hard nosed thuggery of a bastard”

Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Captain Z on November 28, 2018, 01:31:39 PM
What do you get if you cross a ballerina and a bastard? Ballesteros.

That also popped into my head for no apparent reason yesterday :)
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: jake thunder on November 28, 2018, 03:13:33 PM
From Scissored Isle:

"...a supermarket. It's much more than a place to buy cheese, chops, chocs and cheap chicken and chicory and chives"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: MuteBanana on November 28, 2018, 03:47:17 PM
Jesus Christ. The joke is that Alan, local DJ, only likes a Best Of compilation. That's it.

False. The joke is Alan is trying to appear cool to Matt(Matt?) but isn't actually a fan of the Beatles(Wings. They're only the band the Beatles could've been) and so doesn't know any of their albums. He gets away with referring to a compilation album to spare his blushes.

It's that simple.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Bad Ambassador on December 06, 2018, 04:43:50 PM
We've all seen the big-headed boys on farms.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: wooders1978 on December 06, 2018, 07:20:58 PM
We've all seen the big-headed boys on farms.

Eared - STOP GETTING PARTRIDGE WRONG!
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on December 06, 2018, 07:51:54 PM
The last time I was there I took some pot and I was briefly mindless. And as I say he has a huge dog and he may well be drunk and unleash it because normally I ring ahead.

and later...

You’re probably sick of canteen food from being on tour… I forgot, you’re not Bono
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Cuellar on December 06, 2018, 10:57:05 PM
I’ve always liked the wistful “Massive, it was” when describing the fictitious bowl of Alpen Bono would eat, he’s genuinely convinced himself that it happened.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: FerriswheelBueller on December 06, 2018, 11:06:48 PM
I’ve always liked the wistful “Massive, it was” when describing the fictitious bowl of Alpen Bono would eat, he’s genuinely convinced himself that it happened.

“Yeah, I knew that because he composed the first half of it over there, and the other half... over there”
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Tikwid on December 17, 2018, 05:58:57 PM
Still can't get over how amazing the "Berk of the Week" jingle in MMM S2 E6 is. The chuckling Dave Clifton(?) intro, all the voices coming together to mock the titular berk, the weird circus music in the background, and then Alan's final cry of "you're an idiot!". What I wouldn't give to see Alan's face when he recorded that line.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Terryfuckwit on December 20, 2018, 01:50:21 AM
That entire Angela break up episode of MMM. Can anyone find one joke that doesn't land and isn't hilarious?

The aforementioned Berk of the Week.

Argument on the phone with Angela.

'We fucking love each other'
'Will you talk to her?' 'What?'. 'I want to play your bum like the bongoes'. Talking over After All This Time.

'Please please please though Angela'.

'Just chatting to Gustev.'
'Is he alright?'
'Yeah, he's just a genuine friend of mine'.

'Christ almighty, take the caravan. Sure, take the dog too.'
'You know your new business venture, everyone thinks it's shit. Including your sister.'

His dog telling him he'll always be his friend.
'Bet you wanted to hug him?'
'Yeah but when I turned around he was over by the bins eating pa-ACH...pate'.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Mobius on December 20, 2018, 02:10:56 AM
THIS IS VISAGE FADE TO GR EY
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: FerriswheelBueller on December 20, 2018, 02:33:21 AM
“Cliff Thorburn is a sn- ex-snooker player...”
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Mobius on December 20, 2018, 02:36:43 AM
“If you put fennel in there .. we’re going to fall out”
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Tikwid on December 20, 2018, 03:56:51 AM
Argument on the phone with Angela.
"Angela if you dump me now I will Ņ͝E̷̵V̧E͜R͏̕ speak to you again - in fact I'm gonna dump you first - N̢̜̥̫E̜V̸̦͈͇͉̝Ȩ̴̫͍̬͔̙͖̪͟R̷͙̝ ̴̝̬̪̟͇̀C̢̣͚̼͖̺A̘̜̬͎͚̳͘L̴͉͚̥̫͜͡L̲̤̼͕̣̗̤̀͘ ̤̝͉͉͠M͍͈̥̖͈E̝͉͈͍̟̩͈͔ ̴̴̨͈̳̫̟͙͎A̙̺̕G̷̟̀͞A͚̣̙Ḭ̢̳͍̤͈̳̳̳͕͡͝N̨͔͕͡"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Mobius on December 20, 2018, 04:42:40 AM
Alan's dream dinner party

“Jesus Christ. Margaret Thatcher. Denis Thatcher. Carol Thatcher. And… Mark Thatcher.”
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: græskar on December 21, 2018, 06:09:41 PM
The Alan Partridge Blazer Badge Combination with his motto in Latin: "Cognoscens me - Cognoscens te - Aha"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Twed on December 21, 2018, 09:49:00 PM
Would be great to get somebody to translate that!
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: marquis_de_sad on December 22, 2018, 12:10:09 PM
Can't work out the first bit, but apparently (http://latin-dictionary.net/definition/2395/aha) 'aha' is an 'exclamation expressing surprise/irony'.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Noodle Lizard on December 22, 2018, 03:31:59 PM
“Inception”
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: BritishHobo on December 24, 2018, 05:46:29 PM
Had a massive Christmas Eve country ramble today and ploughed through loads of the Nomad audiobook, which I've not done since my first listen when it came out. I love how much Alan loves his walks, but I love even more how casually he admits, during the 'training montage' for his journey that he's getting fit by swimming, not walking, 'because walking is boring'.

One thing that really made me laugh is Alan trying to get into the business park which stands where his childhood home was. "Have you got an appointment?" "Since when do you need an appointment to get into your own home?!" The friendly, innocent way he says it, I love. And as with a lot of Partridge, there's something stupidly compelling at first thought about it - that you eternally have free access to the physical space where your childhood home was.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Tikwid on December 27, 2018, 01:57:44 AM
Few more that've come to mind lately:

- Near the start of one of the MMMs, Alan's comment that he can be found on the North Norfolk Digital chatroom "from 3PM until the wee small hours". He phrases it glibly, but ultimately it boils down to an amazing mental image: Alan sat in front of his computer way past midnight, engaged in balistics debates with the weirdos that he regularly disparages on his show, trying not to let the creeping loneliness slip in.

 - In Alpha Papa, one of the Gordale Media bigwigs at the party saying that he doesn't like black and white or subtitles in films. Something about the way he says it which really cements the dickishness of NND's new guard, even from one of their higher-ups. (also from the same scene: "the camera anglessss")

- JASON STATHAM. JASON BOURRRNE. JASON ARGONAUT.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Shoulders?-Stomach! on December 27, 2018, 08:00:19 PM
We've all seen the big-headed boys on farms.

We've all smelt the small-bollocked men on ships
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: FerriswheelBueller on December 28, 2018, 01:21:36 AM
I’ve just realized I’ve never seen the second season of mid-morning matters. This is terrific.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on December 28, 2018, 09:22:23 AM
"The grunted chant of the balaclava or the reasoned oratory of the North Norfolk Huntsman..."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on December 28, 2018, 09:24:21 AM
God, that whole section: "If they cross the line there's a thousand boys from the countryside alliance ready to go."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: rm2kmaster on December 28, 2018, 01:34:14 PM
"The grunted chant of the balaclava or the reasoned oratory of the North Norfolk Huntsman..."

"I see what you mean now"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: BritishHobo on December 28, 2018, 07:00:23 PM
"At the time, I'd been listening to Ebony and Ivory a lot - a lot."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Kryton on December 30, 2018, 12:17:52 AM
We've all smelt the small-bollocked men on ships

Lads with big hair.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: checkoutgirl on December 30, 2018, 12:23:44 AM
It’s just a cushion that simulates rectal gas
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: St_Eddie on December 30, 2018, 09:49:56 AM
Lads with big hair.

Disgusting.

It’s just a cushion that simulates rectal gas

Especially disgusting.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Mobius on January 03, 2019, 05:31:54 AM
“Well it’s bank holiday, which traditionally would have meant you’d be in a car on your way to the seaside with a Li-Lo, a dog full of sand, some hard-boiled Werther’s Originals, or whatever. But these days, unfortunately, it’s more likely to mean a child watching a violent computer game and pornography while shouting “I hate you!” to his parents who are downstairs having a cocaine and ecstasy-fuelled orgy. That’s Britain 2011, you’re welcome to it!”
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: græskar on January 03, 2019, 01:58:12 PM
Would be great to get somebody to translate that!

It means of course "Knowing me, knowing you", but it's not grammatically correct.

(sorry, don't know if you're asking seriously or if I'm making a tit of myself :p)
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: St_Eddie on January 03, 2019, 06:26:18 PM
It means of course "Knowing me, knowing you", but it's not grammatically correct.

(sorry, don't know if you're asking seriously or if I'm making a tit of myself :p)


The question was almost certainly rhetorical.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: The Lion King on January 04, 2019, 01:51:49 PM
“Well it’s bank holiday, which traditionally would have meant you’d be in a car on your way to the seaside with a Li-Lo, a dog full of sand, some hard-boiled Werther’s Originals, or whatever. But these days, unfortunately, it’s more likely to mean a child watching a violent computer game and pornography while shouting “I hate you!” to his parents who are downstairs having a cocaine and ecstasy-fuelled orgy. That’s Britain 2011, you’re welcome to it!”

This one has Edmonds written all over it, especially in the delivery of the last line
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Kryton on January 06, 2019, 07:34:36 PM
S1-E2 of Mid Morning Matters. I love how Alan refers to BBC's Time Team as THE Time Team.

Something about it just really tickles me.

Also 'The time (team) is... Two, two, two, Two.. *snort*... I'm.err.. *inaudible*..  it really is two,two,two... I'm serious. I'm not even joking, it's actually two,two,two,two...
Right, that's enough T's, I'm going to do the rest of the show without any T's...

*pause*

..Er..  Nah that's too complicated. But we'll revisit that idea next week and see how far we get with that.

Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: rm2kmaster on January 07, 2019, 08:19:28 AM
S1-E2 of Mid Morning Matters. I love how Alan refers to BBC's Time Team as THE Time Team.

Something about it just really tickles me.

Also 'The time (team) is... Two, two, two, Two.. *snort*... I'm.err.. *inaudible*..  it really is two,two,two... I'm serious. I'm not even joking, it's actually two,two,two,two...
Right, that's enough T's, I'm going to do the rest of the show without any T's...

*pause*

..Er..  Nah that's too complicated. But we'll revisit that idea next week and see how far we get with that.

Reminds of his exasperated "IT'S TIME...IS...." from MMM S1.

That or his confused "here is the news gifford, sorry the news with Chris Gifford" shortly after being led to believe the tax office was after him.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Chollis on January 07, 2019, 12:16:44 PM
The deadpan delivery of the caller describing Noel Edmonds as "still very much at large"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Cuellar on January 07, 2019, 12:36:17 PM
Reminds of his exasperated "IT'S TIME...IS...." from MMM S1.

That or his confused "here is the news gifford, sorry the news with Chris Gifford" shortly after being led to believe the tax office was after him.

Absolutely love his flustered getting names wrong in MMM:

"You've been listening to Alan Partridge with special guest Tory Bronwen...Matthews...Councillor"
"...Tory councillor Bronwen Mathews"
"Yup her and get well soon Eddie Shadow..."
"SHEPHERD"
"... who I'm sure will get well very soon
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Utter Shit on January 07, 2019, 04:41:09 PM
Fingers crossed it's just a smudge on the x-ray.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Twed on January 07, 2019, 04:46:51 PM
That reminds me of a really good Alan moment that can't be summed up in a quote. I think it was Welcome To The Places Of My Life, after he gets the all-clear from the hospital. His general elation (I think expressed by the purchase of chocolate bars from the hospital canteen) was wonderful. Coogan is a treasure.

Something else from that special that can be summed up in a quote: "A real cunt". Easy to miss, and that's what makes it.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Utter Shit on January 07, 2019, 04:49:12 PM
Yeah I do like that the Gibbons' very occasionally give him the sort of wins that he never got before they joined the writing team. I mean I know 'not having an unspecified bad illness you thought you might have' and 'finally getting to tell off the teacher who used to hit you' aren't exactly heart-warming moments, but they do make you understand and sympathise with Alan a bit more.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Twed on January 07, 2019, 04:53:10 PM
It's feels little silly to say, but I think we're really lucky that The Gibbons came to Partridge and arguably made something many of us love dearly even better. That doesn't happen often.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: St_Eddie on January 07, 2019, 05:23:31 PM
It's feels little silly to say, but I think we're really lucky that The Gibbons came to Partridge and arguably made something many of us love dearly even better. That doesn't happen often.

Can an infinite number of monkeys type out the entire works of Shakespeare?  Possibly but it's all the more impressive that two gibbons were able to type out some cracking Partridge material.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Rizla on January 07, 2019, 05:26:10 PM
I've been quite enjoying the "Monkey Tennis" podcasts lately,but bejesus do the presenters not display a crazy amount of knowlege-lack at times, eg having to google Ursula Andress. I was a bit floored that they were completely unable to work out the significance of "Scissored Isle" as a title, for example. I suppose they're quite young but, still.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: checkoutgirl on January 07, 2019, 10:58:06 PM
I've been quite enjoying the "Monkey Tennis" podcasts lately,but bejesus do the presenters not display a crazy amount of knowlege-lack at times, eg having to google Ursula Andress. I was a bit floored that they were completely unable to work out the significance of "Scissored Isle" as a title, for example. I suppose they're quite young but, still.

I never got scissored isle. I've pondered it many times.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Maurice Yeatman on January 07, 2019, 11:15:04 PM
The brothers' surname is Gibbons, not Gibbon. COME ON.

I never got scissored isle. I've pondered it many times.

Just a pun on controversial radio presenter Jon Gaunt's "this sceptr'd isle", isn't it? Perhaps I'm missing something else.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: St_Eddie on January 07, 2019, 11:52:32 PM
The brothers' surname is Gibbons, not Gibbon. COME ON.

Just a pun on controversial radio presenter Jon Gaunt's "this sceptr'd isle", isn't it? Perhaps I'm missing something else.

A cultural divide across Britain?  Hence; a scissored isle, as though someone taken some scissors and cut it in two?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: neveragain on January 08, 2019, 12:01:16 AM
Just a pun on controversial radio presenter Jon Gaunt's "this sceptr'd isle", isn't it? Perhaps I'm missing something else.

Shakespeare's quote, more than Gaunty's, I think.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Maurice Yeatman on January 08, 2019, 12:06:34 AM
A cultural divide across Britain?  Hence; a scissored isle, as though someone taken some scissors and cut it in two?

I know. I thought that was the obvious bit. Surely the podcast presenters know what scissors are and have seen the opening sequence.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Ballad of Ballard Berkley on January 08, 2019, 12:07:09 AM
Coogan is the guest on the latest episode of Marc Maron's WTF podcast. What the hell has happened to his voice?! He's developed a weird "splidding hairs" transatlantic accent. He doesn't spend that much time in Hollywood, surely?

http://www.wtfpod.com/podcast/episode-983-steve-coogan (http://www.wtfpod.com/podcast/episode-983-steve-coogan)

Also, I know Maron always admits that he knows absolutely fuck all about British comedy beyond Monty Python and that interview he once did with Stewart Lee, but this interview is particularly egregious. They talk about Alan Partridge for a bit, but it's glaringly obvious that Maron is totally unfamiliar with the character. There's a very awkward moment when Coogan quotes a few lines of dialogue from the new AP series, which is met with stony silence. Okay, it's not classic AP material, but it's the sort of thing that would at least get a chuckle of recognition from someone who knows what that character is all about.

Maron doesn't seem to know anything about Laurel & Hardy either, at one point describing their comedy as "quite one-dimensional". Fortunately, Coogan politely disagrees and explains why Maron is talking out of his arse. To add insult to injury, they go off on a brief tangent about the Monkees, during which Coogan quite rightly says that they made some great records. Maron, the tedious rockist bore that he is, grudgingly grunts, "Yeah, a couple." Fuck off.

Maron also wastes time by talking about Tropic Thunder, a film that Coogan is in for about 20 minutes. He's such an exasperating character. I've actually really enjoyed some of his interviews, he's good when he's talking to someone whose work he's familiar with, but he should never be allowed to interview another British comedian. Those episodes are always completely pointless.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Maurice Yeatman on January 08, 2019, 12:08:51 AM
Shakespeare's quote, more than Gaunty's, I think.

I was joking. It was John of Gaunt who said it in Richard II.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Mobius on January 08, 2019, 12:36:04 AM
I love all the jingles in MMM. The one he's recording in the previous scene, just going 'ba ba ba ba baaa' then uses it like 30 seconds later.

"it's me it's me on Alan on Alan on I on I on Partridge on Part *swallows* ridge"

"Sidekick Simon Sidekick Simon SIEG HEIL! SIEG HEIL!"

the food one "please.. i need some food. I'm famished!"

"Me love Alan Partridge, da man fresh!"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Mobius on January 08, 2019, 03:46:14 AM
"If a fox was a human being it'd be David Starkey - a real git of a guy!"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Bazooka on January 08, 2019, 05:14:10 AM
In Scissored Isle, when he confronts John Thompsons loan shark type character and he opens his car boot and the fuel cap. Followed by Alan completely backing down because the guy likes his show, with "Just go easier on your rates of interest, if you can". The whole intensive hard hitting journalist mocking is sublime.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: FerriswheelBueller on January 08, 2019, 01:30:09 PM
In Scissored Isle, when he confronts John Thompsons loan shark type character and he opens his car boot and the fuel cap. Followed by Alan completely backing down because the guy likes his show, with "Just go easier on your rates of interest, if you can". The whole intensive hard hitting journalist mocking is sublime.

“Why do you look like a sad teddy bear?” is a great line.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: SteveDave on January 08, 2019, 03:45:39 PM
I fucking hate Marc Maron. He's worse than Richard Herring for having interesting people on and then just asking shit questions.

His (Maron) Todd Rundgren podcast was painful. At the end he says "Todd Rundgren...quite a prickly guy" (or sutin like that) and I was almost screaming. Not doing any research and seemingly interviewing people you have no interest in isn't interesting.

EDIT- I've written INTERESTING three times here. 
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Delete Delete Delete on January 08, 2019, 04:02:50 PM
I fucking hate Marc Maron. He's worse than Richard Herring for having interesting people on and then just asking shit questions.

His (Maron) Todd Rundgren podcast was painful. At the end he says "Todd Rundgren...quite a prickly guy" (or sutin like that) and I was almost screaming. Not doing any research and seemingly interviewing people you have no interest in isn't interesting.

EDIT- I've written INTERESTING three times here.

Steve "Intresting" Dave
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: checkoutgirl on January 08, 2019, 05:40:53 PM
The brothers' surname is Gibbons, not Gibbon. COME ON.

Just a pun on controversial radio presenter Jon Gaunt's "this sceptr'd isle", isn't it? Perhaps I'm missing something else.

Not particularly familiar with that quote so would be lost on me. Vaguely remember it.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Twed on January 08, 2019, 08:04:52 PM
I need him to stop doing that accent.

Maybe somebody can answer this for me: I have a theory that when a Brit actor is doing an American thing and they have to BE an American, it all works out a lot better if they maintain the accent the entire time they're filming. Is that how it works? Surely they can't all be just pretending to be transatlantic for four months of a year. I remember Peter Serafinowicz doing this, and he always seemed too rooted to just be really pretentious.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Rizla on January 08, 2019, 08:11:34 PM
I fucking hate Marc Maron. He's worse than Richard Herring for having interesting people on and then just asking shit questions.



I gave up when he did Obama, that was so painful. Also I can't be arsed listening to him go on about his failed SNL audition, feel like I heard that story a dozen times. Very glad I  didn't hear the Todd interview.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Twed on January 08, 2019, 08:11:58 PM
What, Todd? Seriously?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Rizla on January 08, 2019, 08:13:31 PM
His fucking shit guitar playing. Jesus. Just remembered he did that. What a cunt.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Bazooka on January 08, 2019, 10:41:44 PM
What, Todd? Seriously?

Caused me a good snigger reading that.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Maurice Yeatman on January 08, 2019, 11:26:31 PM
Yes, excellent gag. Ten on ten.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: SteveDave on January 09, 2019, 08:12:36 AM
Listening to the whole podcast, I think he was on drugs. He gets up to a full on coke rant when he’s reminiscing about his brother telling him to buy “Hong Kong Garden”
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: vic spanner on January 09, 2019, 12:33:40 PM
"Well, Gary Newbon went spastic."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: magval on January 09, 2019, 12:53:07 PM
"Stephen Hawking" laughing at Alan's joke on the radio play in the first episode of MMM series 2 nearly killed me yesterday. Choked on me Shreddies.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Rizla on January 09, 2019, 01:06:06 PM
What, Todd? Seriously?
Lovely stuff.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: gilbertharding on January 09, 2019, 02:21:15 PM
Good Christ... there aren't words for how fucking tedious Marc Maron is. The first 20 minutes of him twatting on and fucking on (about being 'open minded'... if he'd spent 20 minutes talking about being unselfaware it couldn't be more ironic) were unbearable.

And then here comes Steve Coogan, who hasn't just mid-Atlantic'd his accent, he's shifted his whole attitude presenting this 'tickle me' version of British/Irish culture to this cunt.

It wouldn't be so bad if it was just the accent. I guess he knows that Americans can't listen to British people speaking how they normally speak, so adopt that Briddish accent.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: markpaterson on January 09, 2019, 05:43:03 PM
Haven't found the full interview yet, but happy to confirm that Coogan's BriTTish accent has returned…
https://www.radiox.co.uk/news/tv-film/steve-coogan-details-alan-partridge-this-time-show

If anyone finds the full interview, in either video or audio (preferably video), please post!
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: popcorn on January 09, 2019, 05:44:25 PM
Do we know if this is a half-hour one-off or a series?

edit: six-part series, wicked.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: markpaterson on January 09, 2019, 05:49:50 PM
From MMM to Sidekick Simon…

"WELL 'AV CHANGED ME MIIIIIIIND!"

It's another great example of him slipping into a Manc accent, but this time presumably for comic effect, as it's not even the same as his native Manc accent (I'm from there and easily pick up on the variations).

There's other examples I've picked up on over the years that I'm not sure are intentional or not, eg he might pronounce GLASS and GRASS in the northern (ie correct way :) instead of GLARSS and GRARSS as someone raised in the south would.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Norton Canes on January 09, 2019, 08:38:03 PM
Just been watching Coogan on The One Show, they showed the immediate aftermath of Alan shooting Forbes McAllister from KMKYWAP, and I love that the floor manager guy comes over and really bawls him out
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: The Lurker on January 09, 2019, 10:24:26 PM
"It's like they say: give a man a fish, he'll eat for a day. Give him a fishing rod-..."

"Yeah, he'll come back the next day saying 'you know that fishing rod you gave me?', 'go on...', 'can I have another?' *sigh* 'what happened to the one I gave you?', 'oh I sold it', 'let me guess, to buy some skag?', 'no to buy some fish, I was hungry,' 'did it not occur to you to use the fishing rod to catch some fish?' 'oh, I haven't got a permit and I don't know how to get one', 'Google it!'".

"When did this happen?"

"Oh, it didn't. It's just a generic, annoying man who lives inside my mind. A head squatter - I don't mean a dominatrix."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on January 09, 2019, 10:43:34 PM
"In fourth it's Maris. In third it's Pied (of Hamlyn). In second it's Billie, but your favourite piper is Bag."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: FerriswheelBueller on January 09, 2019, 11:15:42 PM
...'what happened to the one I gave you?', 'oh I sold it', 'let me guess, to buy some skag?', 'no to buy some fish, I was hungry,' 'did it not occur to you to use the fishing rod to catch some fish?' 'oh, I haven't got a permit and I don't know how to get one', 'Google it!’

The delivery on “occur” always cracks me up.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Mango Chimes on January 09, 2019, 11:30:09 PM
<tag>The Complete Alan Partridge (Unordered)</tag>
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Mobius on January 10, 2019, 01:08:09 AM
Hi Susan. I was a bit bored so I dismantled my Corby Trouser Press. I can’t put it back together again. Will that show up on my bill?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Mobius on January 10, 2019, 03:04:07 AM
When he's interviewing Dave Clifton on MMM

"I used to think you were a right berk, but now I realise that's only half the story"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Twed on January 10, 2019, 03:49:59 AM
The second series of Mid Morning Matters made me cry at least twice.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Mobius on January 10, 2019, 03:57:24 AM
The second series of Mid Morning Matters made me cry at least twice.

Coogan’s “Barney. Barney the dog” gets me
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Twed on January 10, 2019, 04:03:08 AM
PLEASE THOUGH! PLEASE, PLEASE THOUGH!

Our love is stronger than carbon fibre

"See you in Battersea Dog's Court"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: markpaterson on January 10, 2019, 06:35:24 AM
from MMM S01E01…

"This is North Northfolk Digital. Sustaining and maintaining our core listenership, in an increasingly fragmented marketplace.

*Plays jingle… interrupts jingle*

I've just realised I've read that from an internal memo. It wasn't… for you… to hear. Sorry. Sorrrrry"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: markpaterson on January 10, 2019, 08:18:56 AM
"Bits, Bytes, RAM, bugs, worms, cookies, reboot, download, clear cache, do not… filter results, and… clear history. We are… all familiar with computing terminology…"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Maurice Yeatman on January 10, 2019, 12:15:55 PM
"Bits, Bytes, RAM, bugs, worms, cookies, reboot, download, clear cache, do not… filter results, and… clear history. We are… all familiar with computing terminology…"

And he mispronounces cache as cachet, which makes it funnier.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: checkoutgirl on January 10, 2019, 12:22:09 PM
Quote
“There’s never any graffiti in the hotel. Although in the Gents a couple of weeks ago I did see someone had drawn a lady’s part. Quite detailed. The guy obviously had talent.”
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Cuellar on January 10, 2019, 12:25:54 PM
"...have some beef swans"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: samadriel on January 10, 2019, 12:31:58 PM
“There’s never any graffiti in the hotel. Although in the Gents a couple of weeks ago I did see someone had drawn a lady’s part. Quite detailed. The guy obviously had talent.”

"That's the tragedy."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Mobius on January 11, 2019, 02:35:10 AM
"You threw Whoopi Goldberg's copper kettle at a cat?"

"Knowing me Alan Partridge, SACKING YOU Glen Ponda"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Cold Meat Platter on January 12, 2019, 11:11:46 PM
I love the Sidekick Simon jingle.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: markpaterson on January 13, 2019, 02:08:47 AM
After a cringeworthy snog-sesh with Angela…

"If I was a dog right now I'd be chewing a slipper!"

I often catch my dog excitedly chewing a toy or what-not and think of this line.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: BeardFaceMan on January 13, 2019, 10:50:37 AM
For those that have the link I've just put the stand up bits from The Cream Of British Comedy in the audio Partridge folder, pretty sure that's everything I have now.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on January 13, 2019, 12:22:53 PM
(Raises hand like at the funeral of Tony Hayers)


May I have the link too, please?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Maurice Yeatman on January 13, 2019, 12:25:59 PM
For those that have the link I've just put the stand up bits from The Cream Of British Comedy in the audio Partridge folder, pretty sure that's everything I have now.

Thanks again for the extra file.

I was revisiting his interview with Simon Pegg as the safe sex expert last night, where Alan hypothesises about being a gayman about to have it off with a man dressed as an American Indian, and being told by Pegg that he must insist the man wears a condom under any circumstances. "What if he threatens me with his tomahawk?"

Also Alan's long list of things he might be able to use if there's no KY Jelly available. "... Pantene Pro V Plus hair conditioner? Eyewash? Sunny Delight?"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on January 13, 2019, 12:30:53 PM
Thanks again for the extra file.

I was revisiting his interview with Simon Pegg as the safe sex expert last night, where Alan hypothesises about being a gayman about to have it off with a man dressed as an American Indian, and being told by Pegg that he must insist the man wears a condom under any circumstances. "What if he threatens me with his tomahawk?"

Also Alan's long list of things he might be able to use if there's no KY Jelly available. "... Pantene Pro V Plus hair conditioner? Eyewash? Sunny Delight?"
In my middle class world I'm sat in a waiting room whilst my daughter has her piano lesson, and this has just made me burst out laughing, to the consternation of the other parents!!
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Maurice Yeatman on January 13, 2019, 12:32:27 PM
Ha! I lost it at Sunny Delight.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on January 13, 2019, 12:53:48 PM
"Firm handshake... And why not?"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Maurice Yeatman on January 13, 2019, 01:11:42 PM
After Alan mentions the other guy is dressed as a native American:

ALAN: He rips off my leather chaps...

PEGG: You're dressed as a cowboy...

ALAN: [slightly puzzled] No.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on January 13, 2019, 02:06:47 PM
"His feathers are dripping"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on January 13, 2019, 06:54:52 PM
"Cowerd, Edmonds, Gordon and now Gallagher."

"You're not the first Noel, you're not the second Noel, you're not the third Noel, you're the fourth Noel."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: St_Eddie on January 13, 2019, 08:24:53 PM
For those that have the link I've just put the stand up bits from The Cream Of British Comedy in the audio Partridge folder, pretty sure that's everything I have now.

Could I have the link please?  I seem to recall you saying that you had a partial recording from one of the series 2 episodes of I'm Alan Partridge and I'm hoping to acquire a copy.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: The Lurker on January 13, 2019, 09:56:16 PM
May I have the link too? Thanks in advance.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: FerriswheelBueller on January 13, 2019, 10:00:39 PM
And me please!
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Spudgun on January 14, 2019, 12:41:30 AM
If four in a row isn't pushing it, I'd also definitely appreciate the link, please.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Poison To The Mind on January 14, 2019, 05:00:26 AM
wot everyone said
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Mango Chimes on January 14, 2019, 09:59:22 PM
And then here comes Steve Coogan, who hasn't just mid-Atlantic'd his accent, he's shifted his whole attitude presenting this 'tickle me' version of British/Irish culture to this cunt.

Yes, it's horribly tailored. The accent's mad (he's working with Michael Winnerbahddum), and it's surreal when he talks about Stan Laurel having a transatlantic accent with seemingly no self awareness. But you're right, he also shifts the entire conversation to American-pleasing. He does a whole Boston Irish characterisation thing for Manchester Irish, talks about how Monty Python was his big influence, and brings up Eddie Izzard as the only comedian he saw.

Curiously unlikeable, Coogan. He always seems simultaneously needy and a bastard, and his thoughts on comedy are a boring received narrative. I can't think of anyone else with such a gap between how much affection I have for their work and how little affection I have for them as an interviewee.

The Lee & Herring fan in me enjoyed his odd little off the cuff and apparently sincere comment that Marber wasn't very good at comedy.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: poodlefaker on January 15, 2019, 11:33:54 AM
I started to watch Ideal Home on Netflix last night, because it looked as if Coogan's character was going to be a gay Partridge. Managed about ten minutes; his accent is bizarre.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Utter Shit on January 15, 2019, 01:21:12 PM
Coogles was on Norton the other night, I kept an ear out but couldn't hear any hint of an American accent.

With regard to the Irish thing...it's fair enough isn't it, his mum was Irish so he probably has plenty of experience of the culture and maybe is only now finding the time/inclination to explore that part of his identity properly. Plus working for however many months on the Laurel and Hardy movie with John C. Reilly, who seems to be completely steeped in Irish culture, probably helped.

I'm in a similar boat, albeit younger - I never really paid much attention to my Irish roots (both parents born and raised there) until my late 20s, then almost overnight I took a much greater interest in it.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: markpaterson on January 16, 2019, 04:33:56 AM
ALAN'S. BALANCED. DEBATE.

(it's genuinely balanced)
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Mobius on January 16, 2019, 04:47:14 AM
ALAN'S. BALANCED. DEBATE.

(it's genuinely balanced)

Haha. Reminds me of another good jingle

Zoe - Spanning the alphabet from A to Z, it's Alan and Zoe!
Alan - But mainly Alan.


"An Annus Horriblis, which is actually just Latin for The Queen's Sad Year"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: markpaterson on January 16, 2019, 05:29:57 AM
re: Coogan's americanized accent on recent US interviews.

I don't buy that fact that he's been spending time in America as the reason for it accidentally changing. I've lived in the US for 10 years now, and my accent, to many people, still sounds like I've stepped off the plane from Manchester Airport (although some people from back home can hear subtle changes). But again, I speak to people from England on the phone a lot, and that helps keep my accent in check.
 
It's clear from Coogan's recent British interviews that he's able to turn his Americanized accent on and off like a tap (faucet?). I think this is 100% intentional and beneficial to him (for whatever reason), and obviously very easy for a man of his talents. Maybe it's to be easier understood? Or Accepted?

He did comment in another interview how when in America he might ask for "wader" instead of "water" simply to be understood, and to be honest I often find myself doing the same kind of thing. When I introduce myself as Mark in my British accent, 9 times of out 10 they reply "Mike?". Imagine a US southern drawl accent saying Mark and you'll see what I mean, it kind of sounds like Maaaaak / Miiiiiiike. So now I always roll my R slightly so they hear it as Mark instead. And a little piece of me dies inside.

Anyway, just my 2 cents (pence?) as a Brit living in the US.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: popcorn on January 16, 2019, 06:09:18 AM
I dunno, I do think it could easily be accidental.

I lived in Canada for a year and when I got back everyone said I sounded the same. But then a weird thing happened - I dialled what I thought was a drum shop but somehow fucked it up on my phone completely and ended up dialling my dad. When I started speaking he told me I'd got the wrong number, at which point I recognised his voice, but he said I'd sounded Canadian. As soon as I hung up my friend who'd been sitting next to me said "You sounded really Canadian just then." I think my brain had gone into "you're about to talk to some sort of customer service person you don't know" mode and slotted me into a Canadian gear.

Likewise, when I listen back to recordings of conversations I made in Canada, with Canadians, I sound cringily transadlantic now. And one of my friends lived in New Orleans for six months and she came back saying "budder" and it did my head in.

In Coogan's case, he's such a linguistic sponge - I mean he started off doing impressions as we all know - it makes sense that his accent would morph in different contexts even more than most.

I don't buy that fact that he's been spending time in America as the reason for it accidentally changing. I've lived in the US for 10 years now, and my accent, to many people, still sounds like I've stepped off the plane from Manchester Airport

Coogan probably sounds super-British (or maybe even Irish) to most Americans in that podcast interview. Brits used to his normal accent hear the American parts, as they're weird to us, and Americans will hear the British parts.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on January 16, 2019, 06:43:47 AM
I remember being in NYC and asking for a tomato juice, about 5 times, to a very confused waitress. When I said tom-ay-to juice she understood straight away.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: popcorn on January 16, 2019, 06:54:26 AM
I remember being in NYC and asking for a tomato juice, about 5 times, to a very confused waitress. When I said tom-ay-to juice she understood straight away.

Right, and then after that point you probably said tomayto every time, right? Or would have if you'd been staying there long enough. You start off making these kind of smoothing changes consciously but then other ones slip in and before you know it you're a full race traitor.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: BeardFaceMan on January 16, 2019, 08:27:45 AM
Its been a whole since I've watched the DVDs but didnt one of them have some of the radio jingles as an extra? Would be great to have all of those and the new MMM ones.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: checkoutgirl on January 16, 2019, 08:44:05 AM
He did comment in another interview how when in America he might ask for "wader" instead of "water" simply to be understoods

Yeah I was on an American plane once and the woman was stumped by my request for "butter". She thought I was saying water. I should have said "budder" to save time. I think even people who aren't actors change their accent to fit in, consciously and unconsciously. Remember that football manager with the Dutch accent. Given Coogan's not only an actor but a gifted mimic it's even more understandable.

Surprised by the dislike for Coogan as an interviewer. Any ones I've seen him do I thought he seemed sound enough. Haven't seen a recent interview mind.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Chollis on January 16, 2019, 11:38:24 AM
Couldn't get through that Maron podcast. That accent is baffling.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: jake thunder on January 16, 2019, 12:06:39 PM
I once asked for a bottle of water in New York and the guy thought I said bowtie. Yeah I want a bowtie from dunkin donuts.

Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: FerriswheelBueller on January 16, 2019, 02:49:43 PM
Right, and then after that point you probably said tomayto every time, right? Or would have if you'd been staying there long enough. You start off making these kind of smoothing changes consciously but then other ones slip in and before you know it you're a full race traitor.

My accent is a horrible mish-mash of accents and dialects. I like to think it makes me sound like a global citizen, but tbh I probably just sound like a berk. Such is life.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: DrGreggles on January 16, 2019, 02:51:53 PM
"Fanny hair"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: georgetaylor on January 16, 2019, 04:55:09 PM
Let battle commence
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: checkoutgirl on January 16, 2019, 05:28:21 PM
The boys are back in the barracks.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Mango Chimes on January 16, 2019, 05:43:53 PM
My accent is a horrible mish-mash of accents and dialects. I like to think it makes me sound like a global citizen, but tbh I probably just sound like a berk. Such is life.

Hey, half-empty/half-full: you might sound like a global berk.

A globerk.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: St_Eddie on January 16, 2019, 06:11:16 PM
I remember being in NYC and asking for a tomato juice, about 5 times, to a very confused waitress. When I said tom-ay-to juice she understood straight away.

A similar thing happened when I went to New York with my family as a kid.  My Mum and Dad asked a New York resident for directions to Battery Park and it just went back and forth for a good minute or so; "where's Battery Park?", "where's Baaa wha?!".  Eventually it snapped and he said, in a heavy New York accent, "ooohhhhhh!  Baaaaattery Park!".

American's are weird like that but then again, I suppose that they're not as exposed to our accents as we are to theirs, what with our cultural adoption of their films and TV, which is a part of everyday life for us, but much more limited to our American cousins, when it comes to their consumption of British media.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on January 16, 2019, 08:35:27 PM
"I have got some big tits for you. Tits. Tits. Tits bits. Tit bits! I don’t know what the fuss is about actually. They’re just pointed sacks of fat on a woman’s upper torso for goodness sakes. What’s the big deal people. I mean we’ve all got our favourite…gland. Mine happens to be the…mammary"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Tikwid on January 16, 2019, 08:47:08 PM
Just remembered the amazing detail of how Alan's strangled "LYNN! LYNN!!!" in his Toblerone flashback changes effortlessly to a casual "...hello Lynn?" once he picks up the phone. (remembered it because I'm eating Toblerone now, although I haven't yet encountered weight gain/the urge to drive to Dundee in my bare feet)
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: St_Eddie on January 16, 2019, 10:47:11 PM
"I have got some big tits for you. Tits. Tits. Tits bits. Tit bits! I don’t know what the fuss is about actually. They’re just pointed sacks of fat on a woman’s upper torso for goodness sakes. What’s the big deal people. I mean we’ve all got our favourite…gland. Mine happens to be the…mammary"

"What is point in pointed sacks?"

"What is point in life?"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Utter Shit on January 17, 2019, 10:41:09 PM
What is point point-to-point?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: græskar on January 17, 2019, 11:16:40 PM
"I have got some big tits for you. Tits. Tits. Tits bits. Tit bits! I don’t know what the fuss is about actually. They’re just pointed sacks of fat on a woman’s upper torso for goodness sakes. What’s the big deal people. I mean we’ve all got our favourite…gland. Mine happens to be the…mammary"
...aryTHE INDEPENDENNNNNT"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Mobius on January 17, 2019, 11:59:53 PM
Get well soon Eddie Shadow
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: markpaterson on January 19, 2019, 05:12:52 AM
Always get tickled by his preposterous hand overs to Dave Clifton. This gem from I'm Alan Partridge S02E04:

It's 1 A M, as the whole of Norfolk sleeps, something truly evil stirs.
His coffin lid opens with a shuddering creak… *creeeeak*
An owl hoots… *DANNY FRANCHETTI'S JAZZ BOX* (sorry that's the new digital system)…
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on January 19, 2019, 07:13:37 AM
From that same episode, a perfect moment for our Brexit times:

"Do you want to go to prison? Do you? Do you want to go to prison?"
"You tell me prison is very cushy. It’s like holiday camps."
"I was making a point about something else."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Sebastian Cobb on January 25, 2019, 07:34:11 PM
'it's called an aereolator'
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: QDRPHNC on January 25, 2019, 07:54:13 PM
A pint of bitter and a plate of crackers, please!
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: checkoutgirl on January 25, 2019, 07:58:13 PM
(after having a big shit at the bravery awards)

"I should get a bravery award for that"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: FerriswheelBueller on January 26, 2019, 02:37:53 AM
(after having a big shit at the bravery awards)

"I should get a bravery award for that"

“...she drove off”
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: checkoutgirl on January 26, 2019, 08:28:38 AM
“...she drove off”

"Beep beep, room for a brave one?"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: The Lurker on January 29, 2019, 04:54:56 PM
"There have been more complaints from farmers about, well, what you said"
"How many?"
"50"
"Oh, your age"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Gulftastic on January 29, 2019, 07:15:14 PM
A pint of bitter and a plate of crackers, please!

A pipe of Pringles will suffice...
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on January 29, 2019, 07:32:03 PM
A pipe of Pringles will suffice...
Not a crescent of crisps?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on January 29, 2019, 07:36:46 PM
Sack Lynn for being unloyal – disloyal, and for joining in fun in a way that excludes her employer. And sack her for being an absolute idiot, and inefficient. Then, can you call Bill Oddie and - That’s something else.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: FerriswheelBueller on January 29, 2019, 07:37:24 PM
A pipe of Pringles will suffice...

“A clump of cress”
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Cold Meat Platter on January 30, 2019, 02:06:19 AM
“A clump of cress”

A hot egg.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Norton Canes on January 30, 2019, 01:13:49 PM
Sack Lynn for being unloyal – disloyal

I think that might actually be my favourite Partridge utterance of all time.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Cuellar on January 30, 2019, 01:39:53 PM
"When I get stressed, I drive 50 miles to an out of town Asda and do my shopping dressed as a sexy woman. As I walk round the aisles I can hear the other customers saying who the hell...is that sexy woman the time is eleven thirty"

Hard to convey just how funny I find the delivery of that final sentence and I probably got the time wrong.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on January 30, 2019, 02:15:55 PM
"It's Mid Morning Matters Thursday Book Club or..." (presses button) "Mid Morning Matter Thursday...Book Club"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: St_Eddie on January 30, 2019, 02:16:37 PM
Sad to hear that your man there, James, is feeling bad.  It wasn't his, or any of the actors, fault that the reunion show was a right of royal shitshow.  Not the actors fault.  Producers fault.  Bunch of clueless idiots.

EDIT: Wrong thread, obviously.  iPhone 7's being a cunt.  Want to copy & paste?  Don't buy a iPhone 7.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Chollis on January 30, 2019, 02:20:06 PM
I think that might actually be my favourite Partridge utterance of all time.

Was just thinking the same.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on January 30, 2019, 02:22:39 PM
"Thatcher pop four piece: Duran Duran."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: gilbertharding on January 30, 2019, 02:30:37 PM
Sad to hear that your man there, James, is feeling bad.  It wasn't his, or any of the actors fault that the reunion show was a right of royal shitshow.  Not the actors fault.  Producers fault.  Bunch of clueless idiots.

Should have booked Bill Oddie.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on January 30, 2019, 02:30:51 PM
I have just been falling over with laughter at the "disguised voice" during the addiction action section.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Lisa Jesusandmarychain on January 30, 2019, 02:32:21 PM
Sad to hear that your man there, James, is feeling bad.  It wasn't his, or any of the actors fault that the reunion show was a right of royal shitshow.  Not the actors fault.  Producers fault.  Bunch of clueless idiots.

That sounds like a *completely* forgotten gem from the Alan Partridge canon.
(Don't worry, readers; I know that The Boy Eddie has posted this "Inbetweeners" related comment in the wrong thread, really! ; ) )
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: St_Eddie on January 30, 2019, 02:33:31 PM
Should have booked Bill Oddie.

Yeah and if my Grandad had bollocks, he'd be a very happy man.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Cuellar on January 30, 2019, 02:35:25 PM
I've got a Partridge question! During the 'what condiment would you want if you were stranded on a desert island?' section, a man gives an answer then Partridge moves on only for the voice to reappear saying '..Mustard'. NOW. Is that evidence that the phone-in was prerecorded and he didn't stop the tape? Or did he just fail to cut the caller off and he thought he'd have another go?

Never been able to decide either way on that.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: St_Eddie on January 30, 2019, 02:42:05 PM
That sounds like a *completely* forgotten gem from the Alan Partridge canon.
(Don't worry, readers; I know that The Boy Eddie has posted this "Inbetweeners" related comment in the wrong thread, really! ; ) )

Mate, you ate a horse.  Poor horse.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: paruses on January 30, 2019, 03:16:26 PM
I've got a Partridge question! During the 'what condiment would you want if you were stranded on a desert island?' section, a man gives an answer then Partridge moves on only for the voice to reappear saying '..Mustard'. NOW. Is that evidence that the phone-in was prerecorded and he didn't stop the tape? Or did he just fail to cut the caller off and he thought he'd have another go?

Never been able to decide either way on that.

I think it's the latter - they do that a few times and it always makes me laugh. Don't they do it with the bit: "It's and idiom" "You're an idiot" where they guy comes back and calls him a prick?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Cuellar on January 30, 2019, 03:22:57 PM
Yeah, that's what I sort of figured. It just felt odd that the guy literally just says 'mustard' about 10 seconds too late, as if it was an answer to a question that Alan was meant to ask but didn't. I suppose that just highlights the oddness of Alan's callers.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: paruses on January 30, 2019, 03:26:36 PM
Yeah, that's what I sort of figured. It just felt odd that the guy literally just says 'mustard' about 10 seconds too late, as if it was an answer to a question that Alan was meant to ask but didn't. I suppose that just highlights the oddness of Alan's callers.

Doesn't he have a couple of goes - "gravy" "that's a sauce" "pickle" "That's a relish"

Thanks for mentioning it - I am just sitting here laughing now.

Oh yes - the "idiom" bit ends with him going too far replacing T with M and he comes up with "Cunm" to Simon's discomfort. Am sure he's forgotten the feed though and the guy calls him a dick.

oh dear - laughing again
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Utterdrivel on January 30, 2019, 03:32:51 PM
"And Jews a little bit"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Pancake on January 30, 2019, 04:00:01 PM
"She can want her arse off"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Pancake on January 30, 2019, 04:03:43 PM
MidMornMat Comic Relief special:

"Shit sister!"

And the entire 'Do you know what I hate? Poverty"... which morphs into a rant about the gypos pitching up near his house
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: paruses on January 31, 2019, 02:30:13 PM
The jingle for Simon:

Sidekick Simon Sidekick Simon
Siegheil! Sieghiel!
Sidekick Simon Sidekick Simon


Have been singing it to myself all morning.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Utter Shit on January 31, 2019, 02:55:56 PM
The jingle for Simon:

Sidekick Simon Sidekick Simon
Siegheil! Sieghiel!
Sidekick Simon Sidekick Simon


Have been singing it to myself all morning.

Tim Key stood in on the Elis James and John Robins radio show the last couple of weeks and the first week they played the Sidekick Simon jingle...except (seemingly accidentally) they played the SIEG HEIL one. Mid-afternoon on a Saturday. Amazing.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Pancake on January 31, 2019, 04:29:58 PM
Hahahahahaha!
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Bazooka on February 01, 2019, 10:39:12 AM
All of Scissored Isle is excellent, the section about the industrial revolution; "It seemed like the good times would never end" and "Factory work, yaayy(dubbed in)".
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: ToneLa on February 01, 2019, 12:02:17 PM
 I try to take a break every couple hours. It’s good to get the blood pumping. Um, so I might do press-ups, shadow boxing, sometimes shadow judo. Or, if you like, shad-dow. Oh, that’s the same as shadow. I love word play.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: paruses on February 01, 2019, 01:39:36 PM
I try to take a break every couple hours. It’s good to get the blood pumping. Um, so I might do press-ups, shadow boxing, sometimes shadow judo. Or, if you like, shad-dow. Oh, that’s the same as shadow. I love word play.

What's that bit from?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: ToneLa on February 01, 2019, 05:24:57 PM
Open Books with Martin Bryce!
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on February 02, 2019, 08:27:46 AM
"And now a song from Michael Jackson, in happier times, before his mauling from Martin Bashir which led ultimately, and directly, to his death...And Diana's."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Shoulders?-Stomach! on February 02, 2019, 09:25:47 AM
EXCUSE ME, MUSTARD!
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: checkoutgirl on February 02, 2019, 11:03:04 AM
Keith Hunt:
Does the word Titanic mean anything to you?

Alan Partridge:
Oh yeah, people go on about Titanic, Titanic... Let me tell you something about the Titanic, people forget, people forget that on the Titanic's maiden voyage there were over 1000 miles of uneventful, very pleasurable cruising before it hit the iceberg!
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on February 04, 2019, 08:19:39 PM
"A cross between a wolf and a dog."

"A dolf!"

"Or a wog. Sorry, I take that back. Jasper is very much... well, he's white!"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on February 04, 2019, 08:24:52 PM
"He might say, 'Putting him in charge of X is like putting someone silly in charge of Y.'"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on February 04, 2019, 09:35:44 PM
"I know it won't smash, Lynn, just put it in bubble wrap!"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Mobius on February 04, 2019, 11:46:09 PM
"Can we come live from the Blarney Stone? .. trying to get an angle on this.."

"Yes, ders moire to oirland, DAN DIS"

(when trying to block Siobhan from Meteor Productions in at the Squash Court) "INTO MEEE!"

"that year the nettles were particularly virulent"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Enzo on February 05, 2019, 12:25:37 AM
Not a quote, just the image of Sally Gunnell hitting Tokyo town in her dungerees.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: c on February 05, 2019, 07:52:16 AM
This appearance on Clive James is as good as his Jonathan Ross is bad: https://youtu.be/YiHWmgf31iA
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Tony Yeboah on February 05, 2019, 11:17:12 AM
Michael was just telling us about the time he had sex...with a Land Rover BMW https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/businessman-stripped-naked-simulated-sex-13953500
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Cuellar on February 05, 2019, 11:48:16 AM
What's the significance of Partridge's house being called 'Denton Abbey' and Sidekick Simon being called Simon Denton?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Huxleys Babkins on February 05, 2019, 11:48:58 AM
"It's not a Freelander, Lynn!"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: FerriswheelBueller on February 05, 2019, 11:51:28 AM
The “diff-lock” scene.

“Wellll, it still has a diff-lock”
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Utter Shit on February 05, 2019, 11:53:26 AM
"I later discovered the car did not have a differential lock"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: FerriswheelBueller on February 05, 2019, 11:56:30 AM
"I later discovered the car did not have a differential lock"

“...but actually uses a traction control system where a spinning wheel is braked by an on-board computer, so effectively we were both right.”
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Captain Z on February 05, 2019, 04:10:29 PM
Michael was just telling us about the time he had sex...with a Land Rover BMW https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/businessman-stripped-naked-simulated-sex-13953500

37!?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Twed on February 05, 2019, 04:38:59 PM
To be fair, he has just caught a blast of erotic exhaust fumes to the face.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: St_Eddie on February 05, 2019, 04:51:03 PM
37!?

Fucking hell!  That's only one year older than myself and yet he looks 20 years older than I do.  That's proper desolation, that is.

I know they say that stress ages you but I mean, come on!  37.  Christ.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Tikwid on February 06, 2019, 02:14:28 PM
"I know it won't smash, Lynn, just put it in bubble wrap!"
As much as I like the subtler moments of MMM, its (very) occasional callbacks to the louder, broader Alan of IAP are honestly something of a guilty pleasure for me. Things like the Lynn call, "I want to drive a DIGGER!" and "it's got an arrrgument in a carr parrk"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Captain Z on February 06, 2019, 04:32:34 PM
I just became aware of a new Chemical Brothers album coming soon, and watched the video for the first single 'Free Yourself'. Around halfway through it cuts to a security guard who is listening to MMM on the radio:

https://youtu.be/7wzR_BVFsUU?t=199
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on February 06, 2019, 10:38:57 PM
"And talking of lonely people, here is Helena Rigby, by Beatles."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: QDRPHNC on February 06, 2019, 10:43:20 PM
If a fox were a person, he'd be David Starkey, a real git of a guy.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: FerriswheelBueller on February 06, 2019, 11:22:10 PM
If a fox were a person, he'd be David Starkey, a real git of a guy.

Similarly

“I didn’t know you fancied yourself as a playwright, Alan”

“I don’t fancy myself - I’m not John Inverdale - but I’ve wanted to be a playwright for ages

I’m rewatching season 2 of MMM while staying up with Ferris Jr. I’ve woken him up twice with my poorly-stifled chuckling.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: ToneLa on February 07, 2019, 12:41:44 AM
Nomad is getting another read

"These days, however, I see the world a little differently. My longing for revenge, much like the foreskin of an adult Jew, simply isn’t there any more. Sure, hidden in a bush at the end of Bruno Brookes’s drive last week, I was still convulsed with spasms of ecstasy on seeing him open his front door, only to be greeted by a pizza he hadn’t even ordered, but otherwise I’m a changed man."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: FerriswheelBueller on February 07, 2019, 01:36:46 AM
Anyone noticed the tag line for North Norfolk digital is “The Way You Want it to Be” on the intro credits for MMM? That was the tagline for fictional rebrand, Shape wasn’t it? Sounded like a yoghurt? Maybe it’s been subsumed by NND as a result of the bully-boy tactics of Gordale Media, but they’ve changed the station name but left the tagline the same as a potential oversight to demonstrate how little attention the parent company pays to its subsidiaries.

It’s either a really clever bit of background (because these tiny stations rebrand/cannibalize each other all the time and Gordale in canon don’t give a shit about any of their stations or output), or the writers are just reusing a funny tagline. I think the former, because they’ve paid attention to include rival disc-jocks Wally Banter and Ben Bacton, and also the tagline isn’t funny on its own.

Hmmm. Interesting anyway.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Cuellar on February 07, 2019, 10:16:25 AM
But why is his big house called Denton Abbey?? We know how much time and effort he puts in to thinking up names for his houses. What is the connection between his house and Simon Denton AKA Sidekick Simon??
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: ToneLa on February 07, 2019, 10:22:16 AM
But why is his big house called Denton Abbey?? We know how much time and effort he puts in to thinking up names for his houses. What is the connection between his house and Simon Denton AKA Sidekick Simon??

Nowt.

Not mentioned in Nomad (kindle edition, searched for Denton, the two concepts never tangle) and in nothing else I can remember! But.. But...  I know. I know.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Cuellar on February 07, 2019, 10:25:23 AM
Hmmmm. With this lot's attention to detail and consistency I refuse to believe there isn't some underlying reason. Is Sidekick Simon there as some sort of favour?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Utter Shit on February 07, 2019, 10:38:30 AM
Might be misremembering but isn't it implied that he's just using that house for the show? I'm sure there was a clue like a woman looking out the window at him, as if it were her house...so he might have just thrown in the name Denton Abbey as a nod to the grandeur of Downton Abbey/pun on Simon's name, rather than actually naming his house that.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: ToneLa on February 07, 2019, 10:40:16 AM
Hmmmm. With this lot's attention to detail and consistency I refuse to believe there isn't some underlying reason. Is Sidekick Simon there as some sort of favour?

Maybe the implicitation is Simon named it that in some admiring quip expressing his own wish for ownership (being a pun on Downton) and Alan is downplaying that link because he's Alan and nicked it and insists it's not a reference to Simon and is merely a pun?

Oh, I 'unno. I might choose to believe that implication!

Might be misremembering but isn't it implied that he's just using that house for the show? I'm sure there was a clue to this like a woman looking out the window at him, as if it were her house...so he might have just thrown in the name Denton Abbey as a nod to the grandeur of Downton Abbey/pun on Simon's name, rather than actually naming his house that.

Nomad has a few asides about big mortgage payments and the dodgy sounding agent who set it up for him, so seems like his actual gaff now
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Captain Z on February 07, 2019, 10:50:56 AM
"These days, however, I see the world a little differently. My longing for revenge, much like the foreskin of an adult Jew, simply isn’t there any more. Sure, hidden in a bush at the end of Bruno Brookes’s drive last week, I was still convulsed with spasms of ecstasy on seeing him open his front door, only to be greeted by a pizza he hadn’t even ordered, but otherwise I’m a changed man."

Pretty sure that isn't in the audiobook. Has anyone read/listened to both and can give an idea of how much extra content there is in the printed version?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Dyl Spinks on February 07, 2019, 03:17:56 PM
Where in the Partridge Canon (or the Partridgeanon) does he say, "It's a regional accent; people at the BBC use them." or something to that effect?

This has been driving me mad all day, and I've been trying to find it to help someone who's to write an essay about regional accents' desirability or otherwise. 
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: FerriswheelBueller on February 07, 2019, 03:18:41 PM
Pretty sure that isn't in the audiobook. Has anyone read/listened to both and can give an idea of how much extra content there is in the printed version?

This is deffo in the audiobook - I can hear the delivery when reading it.

It is before the “driving around and throwing biz-cards at faded celebrities before going to Delia’s for tea” bit, and not having enough time to visit Michaela Strachan’s commune.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: QDRPHNC on February 07, 2019, 06:00:45 PM
Pretty sure that isn't in the audiobook. Has anyone read/listened to both and can give an idea of how much extra content there is in the printed version?

The Nomad audiobook has everything (except the pictures at the back, obviously), but the I, Partridge one is missing a chapter that's in the printer version, for some reason.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Captain Z on February 07, 2019, 06:19:16 PM
The Nomad audiobook has everything (except the pictures at the back, obviously), but the I, Partridge one is missing a chapter that's in the printer version, for some reason.

IP:WNTTAA is missing some lines here and there too, for instance when he leaves the travel tavern a sentence about how he 'could tell Susan wanted him' or something to that effect is cut from the audiobook. I assume there are others.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: QDRPHNC on February 07, 2019, 06:22:01 PM
IP:WNTTAA is missing some lines here and there too, for instance when he leaves the travel tavern a sentence about how he 'could tell Susan wanted him' or something to that effect is cut from the audiobook. I assume there are others.

Is that the line about how he could tell she wanted him to stay and chat? That's in the audiobook.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Captain Z on February 07, 2019, 07:48:09 PM
Part of it is, but there's a couple of sentences cut:

(https://imgur.com/Ny3CNCL.jpg)

And in fact the section it refers back to is also cut, at least in my version of the audiobook:

(https://imgur.com/HuzF5fL.jpg)
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Sebastian Cobb on February 07, 2019, 07:56:37 PM
'let me put that in context for you... FLYING AIDS.'
'...two handfuls of sausage meat please.'
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: QDRPHNC on February 07, 2019, 07:59:08 PM
Part of it is, but there's a couple of sentences cut:

(https://imgur.com/Ny3CNCL.jpg)

And in fact the section it refers back to is also cut, at least in my version of the audiobook:

(https://imgur.com/HuzF5fL.jpg)

Cool, cheers for those. Wonder why they were left out of the audiobook.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: ToneLa on February 07, 2019, 08:22:01 PM
The Gibbonseses get tons of deserved credit but Coogan's reading is fucking amazing and I can read both the books with his voice in my head perfectly. It's so weird listening to the audio while I read; it's like my fucked up, addled mind is coming through my bluetooth speaker as I lay on my bed, having the not just the last laugh.

Shame the Nomad official one seems at a low bitrate but what can ye do.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: magval on February 07, 2019, 08:30:58 PM
Even on CD?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: FerriswheelBueller on February 07, 2019, 08:32:21 PM
The Gibbonseses get tons of deserved credit but Coogan's reading is fucking amazing and I can read both the books with his voice in my head perfectly. It's so weird listening to the audio while I read; it's like my fucked up, addled mind is coming through my bluetooth speaker as I lay on my bed, having the not just the last laugh.

Shame the Nomad official one seems at a low bitrate but what can ye do.

I got it on iTunes and it sounds fine to me. I know sometimes audible have shit versions, so maybe they just reduced the filesize/quality for reasons best known to themselves.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: ToneLa on February 07, 2019, 08:39:44 PM
I got it on iTunes and it sounds fine to me. I know sometimes audible have shit versions, so maybe they just reduced the filesize/quality for reasons best known to themselves.

Mine's the Amazon official ver so it's bloody shocking if they've skimped on that.

I, Partridge sounds absolutely super smashing great, but Nomad has that late 90's fuzzy low-bitrate Napster MP3 sound...
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Twed on February 07, 2019, 08:40:48 PM
Can confirm, my Amazon copy also sounds like shit.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on February 07, 2019, 08:57:04 PM
"The past is a foreign country. They do things differently there."

"And the reverse us also true. Often going to a foreign country is like going into the past. For example if you go to -"

"Albania?"

"-Scotland. It's like going back to the fifties."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: FerriswheelBueller on February 07, 2019, 09:01:33 PM
Mine's the Amazon official ver so it's bloody shocking if they've skimped on that.

I, Partridge sounds absolutely super smashing great, but Nomad has that late 90's fuzzy low-bitrate Napster MP3 sound...

Maybe the iTunes version is higher res, or I have shit ears. Unable to confirm.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: ToneLa on February 07, 2019, 09:02:12 PM
Maybe the iTunes version is higher res, or I have shit ears. Unable to confirm.

Hmm. Need good ears to confirm. Or iTunes.

.... Waiting on someone with good ears!
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: QDRPHNC on February 07, 2019, 09:07:26 PM
Mine doesn't sound like shit (it's the Audible version), but he does seem to read it quite a bit faster than I,P, so I listen to it at 80% speed or so.

"Chill oooooooooout"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Spudgun on February 07, 2019, 10:05:15 PM
I've just had a three-month free trial with Audible, and all my freebie choices were Partridge-related. In case it's helpful:

I, Partridge = 6h56, 95.1MB
Nomad = 6h02, 82.7MB
KMKYWAP = 3h55, 53.9MB
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: ToneLa on February 07, 2019, 10:08:29 PM
Do us (well yourself) a quick (Well, at your leisure) compare of IAP and Nomad cause I have the Audible version and I been ripped off!
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Mobius on February 07, 2019, 10:28:03 PM
YOU GO CAREFUL NOW MY LOVE

Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Captain Z on February 07, 2019, 10:32:08 PM
YOU GO CAREFUL THERE NOW MY LOVE
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: ToneLa on February 07, 2019, 10:33:25 PM
Who..whh....whooooooooooo do you think you are?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Spudgun on February 07, 2019, 10:37:13 PM
I'm fighting an epic battle with the DRM*, but according to iTunes they're all 32kbps, 22.050kHz (mono). By ear, Nomad has a little more going on in the bass and less at the top, while I, Partridge is just simply more pristine. Nomad's definitely the worse of the two, but I don't hear a night-and-day sort of difference, though. Try reducing a bit of the low end on Nomad, and see if that's any improvement.


*On an entirely unrelated subject, does anyone know how to convert Audible files into a more universal format, without losing any quality? Asking for a friend.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: ToneLa on February 07, 2019, 10:43:13 PM
I'm fighting an epic battle with the DRM*, but according to iTunes they're all 32kbps, 22.050kHz (mono). By ear, Nomad has a little more going on in the bass and less at the top, while I, Partridge is just simply more pristine. Nomad's definitely the worse of the two, but I don't hear a night-and-day sort of difference, though. Try reducing a bit of the low end on Nomad, and see if that's any improvement.


*On an entirely unrelated subject, does anyone know how to convert Audible files into a more universal format, without losing any quality? Asking for a friend.

Nah Nomad is worse. I'm being, excuse the language, a right fusspot, and it's confusing as to how and why, but you're hearing it too: why isn't it pristine?

Note to own fevered greedy mind; shut the fuck up and enjoy Coogan. It isn't bad one bit when you're not A/Bing it!

*I use this site for tons of conversion (https://audio.online-convert.com/convert-to-mp3), mainly ebooks and such, but, sounding too easy, it has a Convert to Mp3 section I've linked to, supports Kindle formats, and yes, I just uploaded what was in My Documents\Audible\Downloads - chose my purchase, Trainspotting.aa for example - and five minutes later a local and tagged MP3 is now playing.

https://www.online-convert.com/ - used em for years
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Mobius on February 08, 2019, 12:36:27 AM
Britain has some of the safest roads in Europe. But this isn't Britain, DIS IS DER AUTOBAHN!
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: markpaterson on February 08, 2019, 07:02:15 AM
I'm fighting an epic battle with the DRM*, but according to iTunes they're all 32kbps, 22.050kHz (mono). By ear, Nomad has a little more going on in the bass and less at the top, while I, Partridge is just simply more pristine. Nomad's definitely the worse of the two, but I don't hear a night-and-day sort of difference, though. Try reducing a bit of the low end on Nomad, and see if that's any improvement.


*On an entirely unrelated subject, does anyone know how to convert Audible files into a more universal format, without losing any quality? Asking for a friend.

I sympathize man. 32kbps / 22kHz is unacceptable in 2019. This is why I refuse to buy audiobooks digitally. I don't even consider myself an audiophile, but the sound quality is total trash. It's like listening to a RealAudio stream in the 90s.

For both the Partridge books I bought the Audio CD version and ripped all their tracks to Apple Lossless Audio in iTunes. Sure, each one is a LOT of CDs, but doesn't take too long on modern CD drives and CPUs.

I then joined them all into a single file using the free and easy to use Mac App AudioBookBinder. It allows you to group the files into chapters and name them by chapter. Even if a chapter is spread over say 5 Audio files, you can easily group those 5 together and section it off as a single chapter. It can export as an AAC compatible audiobook format known as M4B (basically a regular M4A file with special metadata that remembers your position, and automatically goes into the Audiobook section in iTunes etc). I do a test export to see how big the file is, but usually settle on around 128kb mono AAC for export, which is more than good enough for spoken word. At that rate a single 6 hour book is around 400MB.

AudioBookBinder link…
https://itunes.apple.com/us/app/audiobook-binder/id413969927?mt=12
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: BeardFaceMan on February 08, 2019, 09:00:33 AM
Nah Nomad is worse. I'm being, excuse the language, a right fusspot, and it's confusing as to how and why, but you're hearing it too: why isn't it pristine?

Note to own fevered greedy mind; shut the fuck up and enjoy Coogan. It isn't bad one bit when you're not A/Bing it!

*I use this site for tons of conversion (https://audio.online-convert.com/convert-to-mp3), mainly ebooks and such, but, sounding too easy, it has a Convert to Mp3 section I've linked to, supports Kindle formats, and yes, I just uploaded what was in My Documents\Audible\Downloads - chose my purchase, Trainspotting.aa for example - and five minutes later a local and tagged MP3 is now playing.

https://www.online-convert.com/ - used em for years


It only takes files up to 100 meg though, any way of splitting the files into smaller chunks beforehand?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: ToneLa on February 08, 2019, 04:24:48 PM
It only takes files up to 100 meg though, any way of splitting the files into smaller chunks beforehand?

Does it? Bah. Took Trainspotting well enough. I'll get back to you :)
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Pancake on February 08, 2019, 05:37:19 PM
Does anyone else Audible copy of Nomad still have the bit after 'acknowledgments' where he reads out a list of people/companies he's got grievances with? Sets the tone perfectly but was removed when I re-downloaded it for a second listen.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Utterdrivel on February 09, 2019, 12:03:01 PM
I've just had a three-month free trial with Audible, and all my freebie choices were Partridge-related. In case it's helpful:

I, Partridge = 6h56, 95.1MB
Nomad = 6h02, 82.7MB
KMKYWAP = 3h55, 53.9MB

Mine are all double the size. You haven't set it to high quality downloads, you silly sausage!
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: notjosh on February 09, 2019, 12:59:04 PM
Just came across this for the first time: Alan Partridge picks his pop playlist (https://www.theguardian.com/music/gallery/2013/aug/01/alan-partridge-pop-playlist). My favourites...

The Black Beauty theme:
Quote
I love the orchestral bit. But when the singers join in with their doo-doo-doos, you can almost hear them rolling their eyes and sniggering to each other, as if they think songs about horses are beneath them. Pretty unprofessional but there it is.

Steeleye Span - Gaudete
Quote
I learned the words to this in a Derby hotel room after the film crew I was with said they’d meet me in the bar before dinner but then didn't. A genuinely fond memory, despite the idiots.

Kate Bush - Wuthering Heights:
Quote
Kate feels every word she sings, never more than in this song. There are times towards the end when you can actually hear the woman wuthering.

Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Tikwid on February 09, 2019, 06:49:08 PM
If there's a distinction between broad and subtle Alan, then what does CaB reckon are the furthest he's ever been in each direction? Because I was thinking about the sex people scene from IAP, and while it's still pretty funny overall, the "I'm at Dan's big hoouuse...........and BOSCH" line honestly gets my vote for the former. Definitely the kind of line that could've still been funny delivered normally, but which suffered from the whole "make every other sentence sound like a catchphrase" thing that folks seem to agree was a weakness of IAP S2.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Spudgun on February 09, 2019, 06:55:02 PM
Mine are all double the size. You haven't set it to high quality downloads, you silly sausage!

I suppose maybe that's what you get for refusing to install their proprietary app and downloading the "Format 4" files directly on a PC instead. If yours are double the size, does that make them 64kbps 22.050kHz mono (if you have the tools to check)?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: St_Eddie on February 09, 2019, 07:26:48 PM
LIZ HERON: "I'm pregnant.  Ladies and Gentlemen, in five months, I shall be giving birth to a little baby Heron."

ALAN PARTRIDGE: "Not literally.  That would be hideous."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: iamcoop on February 09, 2019, 07:54:42 PM
”I felt like I could sell coal to the eskimos”
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: petrilTanaka on February 09, 2019, 08:57:06 PM
every time "I" is followed up with ", Alan Partridge"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: magval on February 09, 2019, 09:59:12 PM
Anyone remember where it is where Alan explains the difference between 'repel' and 'repulse'?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Ja'moke on February 09, 2019, 10:17:59 PM
Anyone remember where it is where Alan explains the difference between 'repel' and 'repulse'?

Welcome To The Places of My Life I think.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: ToneLa on February 10, 2019, 07:37:57 PM
Probably dead common this but might be one of my favourite bits:

I have someone on the line who fears he may be a gay. He's married so wishes to remain anonymous...I'm talking to Domingo in Little Oakley
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: QDRPHNC on February 10, 2019, 07:48:58 PM
Lovely little Tapas restaurant there.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Twed on February 10, 2019, 07:59:41 PM
Probably dead common this but might be one of my favourite bits:

I have someone on the line who fears he may be a gay. He's married so wishes to remain anonymous...I'm talking to Domingo in Little Oakley
Love that one so much, since I'm from Great Oakley and my grandmother lives in Little Oakley and you had better believe if there was a Domingo everybody would know about it, let alone a gay man.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Utterdrivel on February 10, 2019, 11:51:36 PM
I suppose maybe that's what you get for refusing to install their proprietary app and downloading the "Format 4" files directly on a PC instead. If yours are double the size, does that make them 64kbps 22.050kHz mono (if you have the tools to check)?


I 'unno. Just stop being a plum and do things properly!

Format 4 indeed.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Bazooka on February 11, 2019, 03:30:07 AM
Probably dead common this but might be one of my favourite bits:

I have someone on the line who fears he may be a gay. He's married so wishes to remain anonymous...I'm talking to Domingo in Little Oakley

I think I mentioned it here first, but it really is such a well constructed joke, everything about it is spot on.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on February 11, 2019, 07:56:49 AM
Lovely little Tapas restaurant there.
I wonder if Domingo works there?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: ToneLa on February 11, 2019, 09:16:39 AM
I wonder if Domingo works there?

Spanish name innit?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Huxleys Babkins on February 11, 2019, 10:11:15 AM
There's a similar joke in Scissored Isle about a girl who'd used a loan shark and they'd masked her face and voice (badly) to keep her anonymous but Alan pulls up outside her house with the street name and house number clearly visible.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Cuellar on February 11, 2019, 10:21:11 AM
And then blur his face and not hers for a shot.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Bennett Brauer on February 11, 2019, 10:35:37 AM
And then blur his face and not hers for a shot.

Aye. A brilliant gag. https://www.cookdandbombd.co.uk/forums/index.php/topic,61367.msg3736531.html#msg3736531
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: DrGreggles on February 11, 2019, 10:46:23 AM
(https://i.imgur.com/yBSizVO.jpg)
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: The Lurker on February 11, 2019, 04:12:43 PM
The Police Officer in this scene was none other than Jessica Knappett

Police Officer: [reading from transcript of radio conversation] 01:00 Partridge: I wish this was abroad because it would make a brilliant Banged Up Abroad
Farrell: What's Banged Up Abroad?
Partridge: You don't know Banged Up Abroad?
Farrell: No
Partridge: Everyone knows Banged Up Abroad
Farrell: I don't, what is Banged Up Abroad
Partridge: You seriously don't know Banged Up Abroad? You have to be shitting me
Farrell: I've never even heard of Banged Up Abroad

Policewoman: Just get to the bit where they stop saying Banged Up Abroad

*Turns a few pages*

Police Officer: Sidekick Simon: I once banged up a broad
Partridge: That's the best you've got, even with a gun to your head?

Policewoman: He's got a gun to his head?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Pancake on February 11, 2019, 04:43:44 PM
I think they're worse than scum, I think they're.... I want to say sludge?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: NoOffenceLynn on February 11, 2019, 05:10:04 PM
On MMM Sidekick Simon in going through the papers to find a "funny" story about a postman that has gone missing and comparing it to The Royal Mail, he will turn up but just not on time a bit like our post.

Alan: (completely deadpan) yeah, they just found his body this morning.

Awkward radio silence.

Then the news headlines kick in with the top story being about the said postman's body being identified after being found washed up...
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on February 11, 2019, 06:29:52 PM
On MMM Sidekick Simon in going through the papers to find a "funny" story about a postman that has gone missing and comparing it to The Royal Mail, he will turn up but just not on time a bit like our post.

Alan: (completely deadpan) yeah, they just found his body this morning.

Awkward radio silence.

Then the news headlines kick in with the top story being about the said postman's body being identified after being found washed up...
I watched this again just the other day. This section is so well timed and the news headline just caps it off perfectly.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Pancake on February 11, 2019, 08:26:02 PM
The entire interview with the countryside alliance nob is amazing.

“Spiffing... er errr err wagwan!”
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Pancake on February 11, 2019, 08:28:03 PM
The bit where he’s trying to cover up some minor racism and he goes “err... because I trumped”
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Pancake on February 11, 2019, 08:39:00 PM
I’d love to see you call it a roly-poly in from of Andy McNabb. He’s knock you out!
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: FerriswheelBueller on February 11, 2019, 08:40:48 PM
I’d love to see you call it a roly-poly in from of Andy McNabb. He’s knock you out!

“...She'd invite the Harlem Globetrotters and Nigel Farage.”

“Ohhh - he'd get battered!”
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Shoulders?-Stomach! on February 12, 2019, 08:25:29 AM
In Scissored Isle, when he confronts John Thompsons loan shark type character and he opens his car boot and the fuel cap. Followed by Alan completely backing down because the guy likes his show, with "Just go easier on your rates of interest, if you can". The whole intensive hard hitting journalist mocking is sublime.

Wonderful moment, thanks.

Iirc he observes he "hasn't even brushed his teeth"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: imitationleather on February 12, 2019, 09:11:44 AM
The Police Officer in this scene was none other than Jessica Knappett

Police Officer: [reading from transcript of radio conversation] 01:00 Partridge: I wish this was abroad because it would make a brilliant Banged Up Abroad
Farrell: What's Banged Up Abroad?
Partridge: You don't know Banged Up Abroad?
Farrell: No
Partridge: Everyone knows Banged Up Abroad
Farrell: I don't, what is Banged Up Abroad
Partridge: You seriously don't know Banged Up Abroad? You have to be shitting me
Farrell: I've never even heard of Banged Up Abroad

Policewoman: Just get to the bit where they stop saying Banged Up Abroad

*Turns a few pages*

Police Officer: Sidekick Simon: I once banged up a broad
Partridge: That's the best you've got, even with a gun to your head?

Policewoman: He's got a gun to his head?

Ah man. By some considerable distance the funniest moment in Alpha Papa. It almost makes me want to watch it again. Not enough to, y'know, actually watch it. But enough to make the thought of doing it cross my mind.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Huxleys Babkins on February 12, 2019, 11:05:44 AM
“...She'd invite the Harlem Globetrotters and Nigel Farage.”

“Ohhh - he'd get battered!”

Coogan and Key just losing it toward the end of that seemingly improvised line is beautiful.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Pancake on February 12, 2019, 11:44:08 AM
Strod?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: bradaaron87 on February 12, 2019, 02:58:20 PM
Comic Relief '99. Impossible to pick one gem; the whole thing is basically just one massive gem.

https://youtu.be/f2hFb0vleDM (https://youtu.be/f2hFb0vleDM)

This is apex Alan. Peak Partridge, if you will.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Twed on February 12, 2019, 03:30:48 PM
Partridge pinnacle
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Pancake on February 12, 2019, 04:10:33 PM
His reaction when he had his bum brutally exposed in another Comic Relief is brilliant, half pulling his pleat-fronted slacks up with one hand, as is his reference to the incident as a gang-debagging is I, Partridge
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: The Lion King on February 12, 2019, 04:54:57 PM
I can't remember the exact quote but on MMM series one where he interviews the entrepreneur who he is keen to impress, the chap says something about relying too much on computers and Alan thumps his computer 'Yea, ya bitch!'
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Chollis on February 12, 2019, 04:58:56 PM
What's the sort-of jingle thing of Alan doing a Jamaican accent "Me love Alan Partridge, mon. Man is fresh" or something to that effect. So many joyous little snippets like that throughout MMM that make me laugh but i can never remember.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Tikwid on February 12, 2019, 05:21:23 PM
Comic Relief '99. Impossible to pick one gem; the whole thing is basically just one massive gem.

https://youtu.be/f2hFb0vleDM (https://youtu.be/f2hFb0vleDM)

This is apex Alan. Peak Partridge, if you will.
Not even kidding when I say watching 6:14 - 6:35 is the closest I've ever felt to having sleep paralysis while awake.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: gmoney on February 12, 2019, 06:08:15 PM
Wonderful moment, thanks.

Iirc he observes he "hasn't even brushed his teeth"

"Why do you look like a sad teddy in a suit?"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: bradaaron87 on February 12, 2019, 07:14:41 PM
Not even kidding when I say watching 6:14 - 6:35 is the closest I've ever felt to having sleep paralysis while awake.

Haha tremendous.

Looking back, you can tell the Dundee Incident wasn't far off. We're watching someone clearly on the brink of total collapse.

"Bladacker's Rowan Atkinson, the rubber famous man... Bean."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Solid Jim on February 12, 2019, 08:03:34 PM
Not even kidding when I say watching 6:14 - 6:35 is the closest I've ever felt to having sleep paralysis while awake.

I knew exactly which moment this would be! However, this is the first time I have ever noticed Michael's whispered "Are you all right, Mr Partridge?"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Cuellar on February 12, 2019, 08:15:59 PM
What's all that about getting married to a Canadian?! Pretty sure that's never even mentioned in any other things - are these Comic Relief things not canon?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: McChesney Duntz on February 12, 2019, 08:18:25 PM
"Spurts porsonality" - glorious.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: magval on February 12, 2019, 09:04:11 PM
Wonder who wrote this.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Yussef Dent on February 13, 2019, 12:18:09 AM
What's all that about getting married to a Canadian?! Pretty sure that's never even mentioned in any other things - are these Comic Relief things not canon?

I could be completely wrong here but I vaguely remember reading that his partner in IAP 2 was supposed to be a Canadian woman called Toni, but they ditched that idea and changed it to Sonja.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: The Lion King on February 13, 2019, 12:38:40 AM
His reaction when he had his bum brutally exposed in another Comic Relief is brilliant, half pulling his pleat-fronted slacks up with one hand, as is his reference to the incident as a gang-debagging is I, Partridge

I felt quite sorry for him there! I think that was cited as one of the reasons for his descent into toblerone. Jon Thompson's 'Get him, now' is quite sinister
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: bradaaron87 on February 13, 2019, 01:22:19 AM
What's all that about getting married to a Canadian?! Pretty sure that's never even mentioned in any other things - are these Comic Relief things not canon?

He never did marry Toni, presumably. Visa complications? Either way, probably for the best when you consider his state of mind.

Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Bazooka on February 13, 2019, 01:03:15 PM
I felt quite sorry for him there! I think that was cited as one of the reasons for his descent into toblerone. Jon Thompson's 'Get him, now' is quite sinister

Its brilliantly topped with the cream pie being slapped on his arse.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: notjosh on February 13, 2019, 01:44:44 PM
Rewatching MMM S1 to get me in the mood for TTWAP. Does anyone know if there's a massive difference between the original Fosters shorts (OFS) and the edited episodes that went out on Sky (EETWOOS)?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Mango Chimes on February 13, 2019, 02:23:53 PM
It's weird Fosters just gave them up, isn't it? Obviously, they'll have been bought out, but nevertheless – if they'd stayed on YouTube, they'd be perpetually successful no-cost sponsored content that would keep them visible. Instead, it's almost forgotten that they were instrumental in restarting one of the greatest comedy characters ever.

Just seen that the Vic & Bob stuff is gone too (uploaded by someone else) so maybe the whole Fosters Comedy thing was a time-limited deal? Seems short-sighted.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: St_Eddie on February 14, 2019, 06:17:22 AM
Just seen that the Vic & Bob stuff is gone too (uploaded by someone else) so maybe the whole Fosters Comedy thing was a time-limited deal? Seems short-sighted.

Ironically enough, being short-sighted is often the result of drinking Fosters.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: bradaaron87 on February 14, 2019, 10:27:03 PM
Just remembered a bloody great bit from Mid Morning Matters, where Alan plays the Sidekick Simon ditty after Key squirms his way through an explanation of the evil nurse skit he did on Bedtime with Branning.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Pancake on February 15, 2019, 03:10:49 PM
Ironically enough, being short-sighted is often the result of drinking Fosters.

Six of those a day and you're away
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Enzo on February 16, 2019, 12:43:11 PM
"and what chicken nuggets"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: BeardFaceMan on February 16, 2019, 03:07:35 PM
I do love the way he started saying a hard 'h' in words like 'why' and 'what'.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: c on February 16, 2019, 10:02:36 PM
Although I believe it was a conspiracy, to get rid of her, I'm not against the idea of state assassination.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Twed on February 16, 2019, 10:13:28 PM
I do love the way he started saying a hard 'h' in words like 'why' and 'what'.
What made me thus? WHAT made me THUS?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Shaky on February 17, 2019, 12:17:47 PM
Comic Relief '99. Impossible to pick one gem; the whole thing is basically just one massive gem.

https://youtu.be/f2hFb0vleDM (https://youtu.be/f2hFb0vleDM)

This is apex Alan. Peak Partridge, if you will.

It slots so well into Partridge canon I wonder if they were already intending to have him suffer a breakdown, some three years before the next series?

Also the first time I've noticed the Goldeneye jacket!
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: notjosh on February 17, 2019, 01:56:42 PM
Rewatching MMM it strikes me what a well-produced radio show Alan is running. Music aside, there's a constant flow of new formats, varied in-studio guests, stunts and phone-ins (with a very engaged listenership). I've worked around radio a little bit and it is by no means easy to run a daily show like that. Especially as Alan appears to be producing himself. I'd listen to it.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: ian01604 on February 17, 2019, 09:26:53 PM
I could be completely wrong here but I vaguely remember reading that his partner in IAP 2 was supposed to be a Canadian woman called Toni, but they ditched that idea and changed it to Sonja.
yeah I remember reading that in an interview prior to the series. I'm sure it also said they would be living in a houseboat too.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: ToneLa on February 17, 2019, 10:34:45 PM
I'm glad they didn't go that way, Sonja and a caravan is more likely for the character
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on February 17, 2019, 11:04:37 PM
I don't have Nomad in front of me. Doesn't detective Swallow live on a houseboat?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: ToneLa on February 17, 2019, 11:16:28 PM
Can't find a reference to it, just Flint's house:

(https://i.imgur.com/18EOEVx.png)
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: QDRPHNC on February 18, 2019, 12:17:04 AM
Sonia is great, but it would have been great seeing Alan with a brash North American type too. Dragging him to things he doesn't want to go to and embarrassing him in public by speaking her mind. Although are you sure you're not getting this mixed up with Toni from Peep Show, who was played by a Canadian?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Kryton on February 18, 2019, 12:30:36 AM
My all time favourite Partidge moment is this. The Mary call. [edited unused Alan]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hWpBH1je2Ks&t=203s
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: FerriswheelBueller on February 18, 2019, 12:58:33 AM
Sonia is great, but it would have been great seeing Alan with a brash North American type too. Dragging him to things he doesn't want to go to and embarrassing him in public by speaking her mind. Although are you sure you're not getting this mixed up with Toni from Peep Show, who was played by a Canadian?

Are you sure you aren’t getting Toni mixed up with Merry (sp?), who was Canadian in the show (and owned Jez’s/Hans’ pub)? Or have I got that wrong also?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: imitationleather on February 18, 2019, 01:04:43 AM
Are you sure you aren’t getting Toni mixed up with Merry (sp?), who was Canadian in the show (and owned Jez’s/Hans’ pub)? Or have I got that wrong also?

Clearly getting Toni mixed up with Nancy, who was American in the show but played by a Canadian.

Toni was English in the show and played by an English person.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Twed on February 18, 2019, 01:30:39 AM
No, Merry was the woman from the sectioning episode, and was a Canadian character played by a Canadian (Meredith MacNeill).

https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0672488/
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Mobius on February 18, 2019, 01:50:46 AM
STOP TALKING ABOUT AMERICAN THINGS!

And let’s watch the greatest movie ever made
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: The Lion King on February 18, 2019, 01:54:37 AM
Just listening to I partridge again, and after all these years without questioning the name I finally realise why he called his production company 'Pear Tree Productions'
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on February 18, 2019, 09:10:06 AM
Can't find a reference to it, just Flint's house:

(https://i.imgur.com/18EOEVx.png)
I must have dreamt it.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Lisa Jesusandmarychain on February 18, 2019, 09:17:13 AM
Just listening to I partridge again, and after all these years without questioning the name I finally realise why he called his production company 'Pear Tree Productions'

One for the "I am a thick cunt " "0bvi0us th1ngs Y0u 0nly ju5t realised " thread.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on February 18, 2019, 10:15:41 AM
Getting Toni, Merry and Nancy mixed up with Tex, short for Terry and Texas and that. He likes American stuff.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Captain Z on February 18, 2019, 10:52:56 AM
Just listening to I partridge again, and after all these years without questioning the name I finally realise why he called his production company 'Pear Tree Productions'

And get this that only struck me this morning: Steve Coogan's real life production company is called 'Baby Cow'. A baby cow is a calf, as in Paul and Pauline.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: petrilTanaka on February 18, 2019, 01:57:07 PM
And get this that only struck me this morning: Steve Coogan's real life production company is called 'Baby Cow'. A baby cow is a calf, as in Paul and Pauline.

and what do cows often produce? a bag o' shite
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Shoulders?-Stomach! on February 18, 2019, 09:44:28 PM
https://www.bbc.co.uk/mediacentre/latestnews/2019/this-time-with-alan-partridge

In case it hasn't been posted yet

Probably has been but hey here it is again
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Kryton on February 19, 2019, 02:54:26 AM
'He's sort of Batman to my Robin, You wouldn't want Robin on his own. If the people of Gotham were in trouble, they wouldn't call Robin, they'd call the police'.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: zomgmouse on February 19, 2019, 05:50:09 AM
"bebearded"

I recall this word often
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Chollis on February 19, 2019, 04:08:11 PM
….and please don’t call in saying i’m encouraging people to kill themselves (again). I’m suggesting that one person throw himself off Clifton Suspension Bridge, because he is and hopefully soon to be was, a very unpleasant individual….a bit like...Jammmiroquaiiii…

Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Cold Meat Platter on February 24, 2019, 08:52:12 PM
"We'll be following every twang, whoosh and ka-doing of what is shaping up to be a classic British Archery Championship."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: the on February 24, 2019, 09:03:32 PM
And get this that only struck me this morning: Steve Coogan's real life production company is called 'Baby Cow'. A baby cow is a calf, as in Paul and Pauline.

It's also a line from the Get Calf episode of Coogan's Run. Paul meets a member of a religious cult - as they shake hands:

Cult member:  "My name's Dolphin, as in the mammal."
Paul:  "Calf - as in baby cow."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: mrpupkin on February 24, 2019, 11:07:58 PM
It's much more than a place to buy cheese, chops, chocs and cheap chicken, chicory and chives.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: QDRPHNC on February 25, 2019, 04:10:39 PM
"... particularly virulent."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: FerriswheelBueller on March 03, 2019, 06:10:34 PM
2 popped into my head today, the first from I, Partridge describing the in-house radio station he briefly worked at:

“It was a concept way, way, way ahead of its time - indeed, it folded within weeks”

Secondly, the conversation on self-service scanners in MMM. It would be easy to make him angry at the machines, but he’s actually angry at other people being angry at the scanners because it implies they aren’t scanning their items correctly. Great bit of character work.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Cuellar on March 03, 2019, 06:17:04 PM
Secondly, the conversation on self-service scanners in MMM. It would be easy to make him angry at the machines, but he’s actually angry at other people being angry at the scanners because it implies they aren’t scanning their items correctly. Great bit of character work.

And I'm with him 100%.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: FerriswheelBueller on March 03, 2019, 07:00:56 PM
And I'm with him 100%.

As am I, but it’s not the obvious boorish Top Gear opinion that would be so easy to apply to him. That was supplied by the guest and Sidekick Simon.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: chveik on March 04, 2019, 12:41:27 AM
"let me put that in context for you: FLYING AIDS"

"perhaps he'd be selling knock-off teletubbies stuffed with old tampons"

"should lightning decide to strike"

from Welcome to the Places of My Life
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: buttgammon on March 04, 2019, 09:54:49 AM
"It was either a gun, or the brush from a dustpan and brush."

The Jed Maxwell section in I, Partridge is great in its entirety, but this line always has me in hysterics.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: mr. logic on March 06, 2019, 01:59:38 PM
Phil, if you’re listening, give me a call.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Captain Z on March 06, 2019, 02:05:21 PM
Oh Alan. Where's your sense of humour gone?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Twed on March 06, 2019, 06:49:29 PM
Oh Alan. Where's your sense of humour gone?
She is a fantastic character. I don't know if anybody has ever caught that same sense of domestic, lonely desperate insanity in a comedy character before.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: St_Eddie on March 06, 2019, 07:41:54 PM
She is a fantastic character. I don't know if anybody has ever caught that same sense of domestic, lonely desperate insanity in a comedy character before.

I know that character cropped up in Anglian Lives: Alan Partridge but am I right in thinking that it may have originally been a deleted scene from I'm Alan Partridge series 2?  The lack of a studio audience laughter track would suggest not, but it's possible that it was recorded with the intention of it being used as a VT.  Either way, fantastic scene and as mentioned previously in this thread, I adore the actress incorporating her corpsing into her character.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: shiftwork2 on March 06, 2019, 11:26:36 PM
It's one of the greatest Partridge scenes.  Mary, the sudden loud studio audio, and 'Tuna Melt' with 'Contact Lens'.  That it didn't make it in tells you all you need to know about IAP2.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: St_Eddie on March 07, 2019, 12:16:30 AM
It's one of the greatest Partridge scenes.  Mary, the sudden loud studio audio, and 'Tuna Melt' with 'Contact Lens'.  That it didn't make it in tells you all you need to know about IAP2.

That's exactly why I was asking as to whether it was filmed for the second series.  It would figure if one of the greatest Partridge moments was omitted from one of the worst Partridge related things.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: paruses on March 07, 2019, 10:10:48 AM
So pleased about the Mary appreciation.

She is possibly my favourite character / interaction. She seems to draw so much from Alan - pity, fear, bit of lust, impatience, selfishness. The bit where you're drawn in to thinking she might have (at best) self-harmed and Alan seems to be doing an Ian Lee in keeping her on the line is making me laugh even now when it turns out he just wants to make sure she's gone.

I could listen to her for hours but glad there isn't loads.

It's Amelia Bullmore isn't it? (Excuse the spelling)
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Cuellar on March 07, 2019, 12:34:04 PM
I love all the Mary stuff. And she says 'I thought it was smashing' in a way that sounds exactly like Kenneth Williams in a Hancock's Half Hour.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: batwings on March 07, 2019, 02:44:49 PM
a couple of gems from the Mid Morning Matters outtakes:

Alan: "Sometimes the farmers can react violently to-"
Former SAS man: "-to boy scouts?"
Alan "Yes. They can come out with a shotgun."
Simon: "Or invite them in."
Alan: "And bum them."
Simon: "At gunpoint."

===================

"That was local voiceover artist, John Meeber, who can do any voice. We'd get him in but he's housebound. He had his downstairs loo converted to a soundbooth with an ISDN line installed in 2000.

This is a song for John Meeber. Living in a box by Living in a Box."

Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: FerriswheelBueller on March 07, 2019, 03:06:04 PM
Trying to keep Ibrahim on the line while the agony aunt is out (and doing the travel updates.

Quote
Polly, thank god - I’ve got a sad Arab on line 3
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Bennett Brauer on March 07, 2019, 03:28:07 PM
It's Amelia Bullmore isn't it?

I've always thought so, but others reckon it's Julia Deakin.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Bad Ambassador on March 07, 2019, 04:01:29 PM
IMDb says Bullmore.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Fronty Prongs on March 08, 2019, 07:37:07 AM
Can anyone recommend a good starting place for Partridge? Parents have been cajoling me to do my homework on him for ages but never get round to it. Love him in On The Hour though.

"Oxford and Cambridge, undisputed champions of... Racing boats. But where are the others? I wonder how Norwich are doing"

When interviewing a showjumper "Stil, you hit all the right fences"

And CM's merciless handovers to him. "... And I understand Alan, at the weekend your wife rose from the dead!"

Note - it's only my parents who remind me to get further into Partridge, not parents in general on some kind of campaign.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: BritishHobo on March 08, 2019, 07:43:03 AM
I'd really recommend doing it in order. Radio version of Knowing Me, Knowing You, then the TV version, then I'm Alan Partridge, and on from there. It's really great seeing a whole career in order.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: DrGreggles on March 08, 2019, 07:59:20 AM
I'd really recommend doing it in order. Radio version of Knowing Me, Knowing You, then the TV version, then I'm Alan Partridge, and on from there. It's really great seeing a whole career in order.

Yes, there's definite character growth.
And Coogan's performances are increasingly amazing.

If I had to name my single favourite Alan it would be the I Partridge audiobook. It's just fucking perfect.
Working towards it chronologically makes it even more rewarding though.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Norton Canes on March 08, 2019, 09:46:21 AM
Where's this Mary scene from? An IAP2 deleted scene? Alpha Papa?

I've got the IAP2 DVD and I'm sure I've watched all the extras, don't remember this.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: BritishHobo on March 08, 2019, 10:09:36 AM
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8Vd14mnjfgA
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Cuellar on March 08, 2019, 10:13:48 AM
"Sexy Bitch and Butter Bath" is a wonderful phrase.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Bryan Cocks on March 08, 2019, 10:14:37 AM
"I've got a friend in King's Lynn!"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Norton Canes on March 08, 2019, 10:16:04 AM
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8Vd14mnjfgA

Sorry yeah I found the video, just don't know when it was filmed/what it was filmed for.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: ToneLa on March 08, 2019, 10:56:38 AM
I'd really recommend doing it in order. Radio version of Knowing Me, Knowing You, then the TV version, then I'm Alan Partridge, and on from there. It's really great seeing a whole career in order.

naw. I understand and appreciate this but think IAP1 to get the hooks in.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: batwings on March 08, 2019, 11:06:16 AM
Sorry yeah I found the video, just don't know when it was filmed/what it was filmed for.

It's an extended clip from Anglian Lives,  a special that was shown on tv  at some point after the IAP S2 run. It's an extra on the IAP series 2 DVD.  The longer version is in the Unused Alan extras on the S2 DVD.


Anglian Lives:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i56cRGfVP_s (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i56cRGfVP_s)
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Chollis on March 08, 2019, 11:49:53 AM
naw. I understand and appreciate this but think IAP1 to get the hooks in.

Agreed
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: notjosh on March 08, 2019, 01:00:47 PM
Agreed

Disagreed! I'd start with KMKY radio, but make sure to follow it up with KKMKY (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gr-ZNv63Op0) to get the first glimpse of Alan's wider life.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: gmoney on March 08, 2019, 01:07:54 PM
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8Vd14mnjfgA

Another great bit in that. When talking about food safty inspectors, "those people have more powers than the police, they'll shut you down like that *clicks fingers*". Sounds like something someone told him in a pub.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: MattD on March 09, 2019, 01:23:01 PM
Been revisiting Partridge since the start of the new show.

Incidentally was watching the second episode of Knowing Me Knowing You, where at the end he gets knives thrown at him by David Schneider’s magician. Anyone notice right when the credits roll that Alan has wet himself?! Seen it so many times and is the first time I noticed it!
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Norton Canes on March 09, 2019, 03:18:28 PM
It's an extended clip from Anglian Lives,  a special that was shown on tv  at some point after the IAP S2 run. It's an extra on the IAP series 2 DVD.  The longer version is in the Unused Alan extras on the S2 DVD.


Anglian Lives:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i56cRGfVP_s (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i56cRGfVP_s)

Ah right, cheers. I've got the IAP S2 DVD and I've watched the Anglian Lives doc but ages ago, I don't remember the studio scenes and don't think I ever watched the Anglian Lives extras. That'll teach me to skimp on my IAP S2 watching!
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: FerriswheelBueller on March 09, 2019, 07:44:04 PM
https://twitter.com/OwenTheNorris/status/1100352330518663168?s=20
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: imitationleather on March 09, 2019, 07:46:57 PM
https://twitter.com/OwenTheNorris/status/1100352330518663168?s=20

Amazing.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Twed on March 09, 2019, 08:32:43 PM
There's a bit in Welcome To The Places Of My Life where Alan visits a dry ski slope and meets a woman who says she doesn't ski herself, which makes Alan look troubled.

Well, that ski slope is in Ipswich, right at the end of the road my parents live on. My mother regular goes there too, and has never skied. She just likes the restaurant.

A bit too real.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Ballad of Ballard Berkley on March 09, 2019, 08:47:21 PM
Amazing.

A staggering find!
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: St_Eddie on March 10, 2019, 06:53:25 PM
Incidentally was watching the second episode of Knowing Me Knowing You, where at the end he gets knives thrown at him by David Schneider’s magician. Anyone notice right when the credits roll that Alan has wet himself?! Seen it so many times and is the first time I noticed it!

They talk about it on the commentary track.  The device used to release the water messed up a little bit because the water is dispersed off to one side (more than it should be), which is why it's tricky to spot.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Stone Cold Steve Austin on March 10, 2019, 07:49:54 PM
he does bellow MY TROUSERS ARE WET to make the point though
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: shiftwork2 on March 10, 2019, 09:04:48 PM
Great stuff with the Top Gear review.  Probably use power-sappeningly mundane and a long drawn-out affair on a weekly basis.  It's basically a riot.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Cuellar on March 11, 2019, 10:13:36 AM
https://twitter.com/OwenTheNorris/status/1100352330518663168?s=20

That is wonderful.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Huxleys Babkins on March 11, 2019, 01:00:00 PM
Great stuff with the Top Gear review.  Probably use power-sappeningly mundane and a long drawn-out affair on a weekly basis.  It's basically a riot.

My girlfriend has a 1.4 Corsa with about 70 horsepower, so I use those phrases on a daily basis.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: FerriswheelBueller on March 14, 2019, 11:08:47 PM
Talking to someone about London and they mentioned “cockney”. I accidentally laughed in their face because:

Quote
Cockney is an area in London where criminals live. The police don't arrest them because - and they're very strict about this - they only slaughter their own
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Mobius on March 14, 2019, 11:56:11 PM
"Who invented the skip?!"

"A million miles from the urban decay of the Manchester Ship Canal, and the pot-smoking, whore-ridden waterways of Amsterdam..."

Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: fucking ponderous on March 15, 2019, 12:49:17 AM
Then, can you call Bill Oddie and - That’s something else.
I always thought it was "Lynn, can you call Bill Oddie", which is funnier to me because it implies that he had no intention of actually firing her. It's more in-character.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: bgmnts on March 15, 2019, 12:10:30 PM
I probably posted this already but its still glorious.

The fallout of Forbes-McAllister:

Quote
The Health and Safety man has a lot to say.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on March 15, 2019, 06:01:15 PM
I always thought it was "Lynn, can you call Bill Oddie", which is funnier to me because it implies that he had no intention of actually firing her. It's more in-character.
You may be right.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: ToneLa on March 15, 2019, 11:20:02 PM
Any time an Open Books with Martin Bryce quote gets in here - and it's seldom - I wonder why so seldom (though it isn't brilliant) so I've uploaded it to my OneDrive (https://1drv.ms/v/s!ApsxxicERTh_oVP48l6LS3muy261)
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Rizla on March 15, 2019, 11:38:07 PM
Any time an Open Books with Martin Bryce quote gets in here - and it's seldom - I wonder why so seldom (though it isn't brilliant) so I've uploaded it to my OneDrive (https://1drv.ms/v/s!ApsxxicERTh_oVP48l6LS3muy261)

It's great innit. I guess it gets overlooked because a lot of it is just him reading from the autobiography, but the presenter and the big lad in the audience are brilliant.  I'd quite like to read "Boy Of War".
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on March 16, 2019, 08:17:27 AM
"I'm... not... so keen on it, I mean, I don't like what they did with the idea, they set in in the 17th century, gave him a long nose, maybe it made it a bit funnier... but, but for the British, Bergerac is John Nettles"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: magval on March 16, 2019, 11:04:04 PM
I always thought it was "Lynn, can you call Bill Oddie", which is funnier to me because it implies that he had no intention of actually firing her. It's more in-character.

100% correct.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: popcorn on March 22, 2019, 12:11:40 PM
One of the Miss Norwich models from Knowing Me Knowing You was the hotel manager in I'm Alan Partridge. (https://youtu.be/yNvprn1gn1s?t=40) Fuck my hat!
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Pancake on March 22, 2019, 12:29:14 PM
Who are you waving at?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: markpaterson on March 23, 2019, 04:48:23 AM
Yesterday’s quickfire phone in only yielded 3 calls. My mistake. I think panel beating was too narrow a topic. So today we’re going to open it up with the question, "What is the best thing?"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: imitationleather on March 24, 2019, 11:13:53 AM
"Come on, Jill. You’re from Holt. You’re from Holt, Jill!"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: mr. logic on March 24, 2019, 11:23:14 AM
"Come on, Jill. You’re from Holt. You’re from Holt, Jill!"

Haha, yeah! I love how inexplicably hyper and rowdy he gets in that little moment. And the spiteful little exchange that follows.

Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: The Lion King on March 24, 2019, 02:40:23 PM
Haha, yeah! I love how inexplicably hyper and rowdy he gets in that little moment. And the spiteful little exchange that follows.

'Yea well you are the rudith, Judith'
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kidney on March 24, 2019, 02:43:48 PM
I've recently revisited Mid-Morning Matters and greatly enjoyed Alan calling his ex-wife a "fucking witch"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Chriddof on March 24, 2019, 08:12:41 PM
One of the Miss Norwich models from Knowing Me Knowing You was the hotel manager in I'm Alan Partridge. (https://youtu.be/yNvprn1gn1s?t=40) Fuck my hat!

Had no idea about that either! Similar kind of thing with the widow of Tony Hayers, who was played by the Jam Festival lady in The Day Today (and Simon's mum in CBBC favourite Simon And The Witch).
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Twed on March 24, 2019, 08:28:03 PM
Just want to point out that maybe-obvious thing that Susan/Miss Norwich was also the mum from My Parents Are Aliens.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: The Lurker on March 27, 2019, 04:16:50 PM
https://twitter.com/OwenTheNorris/status/1100352330518663168?s=20

Brilliant. What a find!
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: magval on March 31, 2019, 11:39:27 PM
My brother pointed out to me today that Alan mentions in Joe Beazley's introduction that he first saw his act fifteen years ago. I'd never once picked up on that detail before, and it adds a lot more dimension to the sketch. Joe's act presumably not changing or improving and Alan's bizarre and commendable sense of obligation and debt are added as extra reasons why this is one of the best comedy segments ever.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YT_W6FwN_hY (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YT_W6FwN_hY)
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: BlodwynPig on March 31, 2019, 11:46:15 PM
Just want to point out that maybe-obvious thing that Susan/Miss Norwich was also the mum from My Parents Are Aliens.

She was also in Boon, First of the Summer Wine, The Bill and the 1987 film Wish You Were Here...welling up here.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: FerriswheelBueller on April 01, 2019, 03:59:59 AM
My brother pointed out to me today that Alan mentions in Joe Beazley's introduction that he first saw his act fifteen years ago. I'd never once picked up on that detail before, and it adds a lot more dimension to the sketch. Joe's act presumably not changing or improving and Alan's bizarre and commendable sense of obligation and debt are added as extra reasons why this is one of the best comedy segments ever.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YT_W6FwN_hY (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YT_W6FwN_hY)

And “15 years ago” would be 1979 when this aired, making Partridge 24 or thereabouts.

A 24 year old Partridge going around watching bad ventriloquists and making absurd career promises to them (instead of doing whatever else it is 24 year olds do) is also a very funny concept.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Terryfuckwit on April 01, 2019, 09:01:20 PM
Carmella Soprano trying to bond with her son AJ:

"And you know Ringo wasn't the original drummer. It was Pete Best. And they fired him. Then he put out his own album 'Best of The Beatles'."

Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Yer Man on April 02, 2019, 03:23:21 PM
The bit in Partridge over Britain when Alan speaks to David Silk on the phone and asks him 'David, are you wearing any silk?' and he says 'no I'm naked'. The look on Alan's face is priceless. That's my funniest ever Partridge moment.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: batwings on April 02, 2019, 03:39:20 PM
Talking about a schoolboy nemesis he still bears a grudge against:

“He’s got a pathetic life. I’ve parked outside his house and watched him come and go many times and he’s got a pathetic life. Who is he? He’s Steve Mcoombe, a nobody and I... I AM ALAN PARTRIDGE.”
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: popcorn on April 04, 2019, 03:54:38 PM
I love this one. So simple and so pleasing:

SFO Steve Stubbs: And if you do anything to endanger the lives of those hostages, so help me God I will take off this police uniform and make you pay for it.

Alan Partridge: You want me to pay for your police uniform?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on April 04, 2019, 06:29:14 PM
Charlotte Fraser, Labour, we see these pictures of old woman's faces in the paper, surely the best way to deal with hooligans is to hang them by the neck until the spinal column is severed thus starving the body of oxygen, isn't that the best, most sensible way to deal with them?
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Twed on April 05, 2019, 08:09:09 AM
"A Partridge Amongst the Pigeons"
"What's that?"
"Well it's just a title."

Good insight into Alan's mindset. He just wants to make something bog-standard and full of tropes, but with him as the star.

Also good is him imagining it starting with him in Trafalgar Square "going oh god".
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: petrilTanaka on April 05, 2019, 08:49:16 AM
"A Partridge Amongst the Pigeons"
"What's that?"
"Well it's just a title."

similarly "A Partridge in Paris... A.PartridgeInParis AlanPartridgeinParis", the insecurity and contempt for the audience, "oooh they might not get that it's so clever"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Twed on April 05, 2019, 09:41:06 AM
The "are you getting out here or going all the way with me?" lift scene is incredible.

Alan's uncomfortable face. Susan's confidence, knowing the power she has over Alan. And then afterwards, Alan trying to save face with himself by saying "this country". He was on the back foot, but making a comment about the downfall of society puts him back in control, in his mind.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Twed on April 05, 2019, 10:12:53 AM
Lynne: "I'm just doing a bit of tidying."
Alan: "Tidying?"
Lynne: "Don't worry. I didn't go near... your drawer."

The dramatic performance of this exchange is definitely an homage to soap operas. The way Alan hovers with his hand in the drawer.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: QDRPHNC on April 05, 2019, 03:46:28 PM
It's like a fucking jelly with eeeeeyes!
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: paruses on April 05, 2019, 06:34:13 PM
I love this one. So simple and so pleasing:

SFO Steve Stubbs: And if you do anything to endanger the lives of those hostages, so help me God I will take off this police uniform and make you pay for it.

Alan Partridge: You want me to pay for your police uniform?

Ha! That's popped into my head a couple of days ago and really made me laugh out of nowhere; even though it's signalled a mile away I love it.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: popcorn on April 05, 2019, 06:40:03 PM
Ha! That's popped into my head a couple of days ago and really made me laugh out of nowhere; even though it's signalled a mile away I love it.

Yes. I love how it's just a classic gag, like something from Police Squad, and even though it's predictable there's something amusingly inevitable about it.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: notjosh on April 10, 2019, 12:42:56 PM
This is good fun. Nice to see Coogan laughing at the bits of Partridge he'd forgotten about:

How well does Steve Coogan know Alan Partridge? (https://www.msn.com/en-gb/entertainment/movies-and-tv/how-well-does-steve-coogan-know-alan-partridge/vi-BBVkNim)
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Cuellar on April 10, 2019, 12:48:10 PM
"I just fist it into a discarded coffee beaker and pop it into a canal"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Huxleys Babkins on April 11, 2019, 03:13:52 PM
"The first made his money from online activity. And the second? Well, let me give you a clue; If you've ever been in a tanning studio in the county of Norfolk, chances are he owns it. That's right; it's Darrell Flench!"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: paruses on April 17, 2019, 01:56:31 PM
Just watching Scissored Isle - when the security guard discovers him in the warehouse you hear a quiet incredulous "what have you done with your fucking clothes?"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on April 19, 2019, 08:51:09 PM
"Scope?  Why do they change the name and ruin it? Consignia and Scope. It’s the Post Office and the Spastic Society."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on April 20, 2019, 08:21:51 AM
"I wanted to watch Roger Moore necking with Fiona Fullerton. And instead, I have to watch a giant Michael Bolton lookalike, in a tight vest, throwing an oven over bales of hay!"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: St_Eddie on April 20, 2019, 03:36:20 PM
"Scope?  Why do they change the name and ruin it? Consignia and Scope. It’s the Post Office and the Spastic Society."

When I watched that in my youth, I thought to myself 'what a prat' but sadly, I increasingly find that quote to be more and more relatable with every passing year.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on April 20, 2019, 05:06:15 PM
When I watched that in my youth, I thought to myself 'what a prat' but sadly, I increasingly find that quote to be more and more relatable with every passing year.
Surely you mean "What a dilbert!"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: St_Eddie on April 20, 2019, 05:22:18 PM
When I watched that in my youth, I thought to myself 'what a prat' but sadly, I increasingly find that quote to be more and more relatable with every passing year.

What a dilbert!
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: QDRPHNC on April 20, 2019, 06:12:35 PM
Don't know where else to post this, but in I:P he mentioned Arlo Wholefoods. In Nomad, he talks about Arlo Says Action, a production facility inside a converted barn. I wonder if Alan talked Arlo into doing it, promising him a lucrative stream of corporate promotional video work that never materialized.

I realize how far into nerd territory I am at this point.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: FerriswheelBueller on April 20, 2019, 07:08:43 PM
Don't know where else to post this, but in I:P he mentioned Arlo Wholefoods. In Nomad, he talks about Arlo Says Action, a production facility inside a converted barn. I wonder if Alan talked Arlo into doing it, promising him a lucrative stream of corporate promotional video work that never materialized.

I realize how far into nerd territory I am at this point.

He claims that Arlo convinces him to work on them though (“saying the fee was high and the time commitment minimal”). Could be a bluff, but it seems that he’s always been pals with mid-level regional media barons, such as the inimitable Pete Gabitas. It’s why he does all those shit van ads on local radio.

I think Arlo is innocent here.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: FerriswheelBueller on April 20, 2019, 07:13:10 PM
I guess “willing to go along with” local media barons, rather than just being friendly with.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: QDRPHNC on April 20, 2019, 07:35:42 PM
He claims that Arlo convinces him to work on them though (“saying the fee was high and the time commitment minimal”). Could be a bluff, but it seems that he’s always been pals with mid-level regional media barons, such as the inimitable Pete Gabitas. It’s why he does all those shit van ads on local radio.

I think Arlo is innocent here.

See, I thought that too. But it could also be a bluff, in the same way he claims Sidekick Simon was hitting himself with the fire extinguisher in Nomad. He doesn't want to take responsibility for running Arlo's thriving wholefoods concern into the ground.

Arlo is innocent whichever way you slice it, definitely the victim here, either of market forces, or Partridge. It wasn't his fault that Gary and Larry selected "Think!" for BBC corporate training purposes.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: FerriswheelBueller on April 21, 2019, 12:52:36 AM
Though it does indicate a lack of care in procuring the video by Gary (or Larry)
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Twed on April 28, 2019, 05:08:39 AM
Anglian Lives is seriously underrated. Some of the best Partridge, ever. Probably the best IAP-era Partridge full stop.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U5KH-vxNc6g "Part 2" especially. The hawker, the way he says "throat cancer" in a French accent. The hawker's really funny jokes (super kestrel). Alan's extreme annoyance with the plane crash/supermodel cannibalism caller. That in particular shows a part of Alan's character that I think is great: he's actually quite an intelligent person, despite being socially oblivious. He's often annoyed with other people being slower than him.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on April 28, 2019, 08:21:25 AM
Anglian Lives is seriously underrated. Some of the best Partridge, ever. Probably the best IAP-era Partridge full stop.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U5KH-vxNc6g "Part 2" especially. The hawker, the way he says "throat cancer" in a French accent. The hawker's really funny jokes (super kestrel). Alan's extreme annoyance with the plane crash/supermodel cannibalism caller. That in particular shows a part of Alan's character that I think is great: he's actually quite an intelligent person, despite being socially oblivious. He's often annoyed with other people being slower than him.
I know I have read downer on TTWAP but you can see the difference in quality. Anglian Lives is consistently funny, rarely goes over the top ("James Cameroon") and doesn't rely on silly pronunciation (except for digital Dave).

It's great.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: popcorn on April 28, 2019, 06:53:09 PM
I know I have read downer on TTWAP but you can see the difference in quality. Anglian Lives is consistently funny, rarely goes over the top ("James Cameroon") and doesn't rely on silly pronunciation (except for digital Dave).

Tittanic.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: gmoney on May 08, 2019, 01:44:05 PM
*One the phone*

Get her a babydoll nightie. Put a bow on it and wrap it in bubble wrap ... ... I know it's not going to smash Lynn, WRAP IT IN BUBBLE WRAP.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: gilbertharding on May 08, 2019, 04:01:16 PM
If no-one's mentioned it yet, I always like the exchange with the estate agent about the school near the house, because at the time I was helping design a school with a hearing-impaired unit and during every meeting I was resisting the temptation to check that they were 'just deaf... they're not deaf offenders.'
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: QDRPHNC on May 08, 2019, 04:06:39 PM
If no-one's mentioned it yet, I always like the exchange with the estate agent about the school near the house, because at the time I was helping design a school with a hearing-impaired unit and during every meeting I was resisting the temptation to check that they were 'just deaf... they're not deaf offenders.'

I think the guy playing the estate agent is brilliant in it. Captures that slightly awkward ingratiating nervousness very well.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: All Surrogate on May 08, 2019, 07:09:13 PM
I think the guy playing the estate agent is brilliant in it.

Philip Fox, the original Baldrick (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Philip_Fox_(actor)).
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on May 08, 2019, 08:48:56 PM
If no-one's mentioned it yet, I always like the exchange with the estate agent about the school near the house, because at the time I was helping design a school with a hearing-impaired unit and during every meeting I was resisting the temptation to check that they were 'just deaf... they're not deaf offenders.'
"That mean there will be noise or there won’t be noise?"
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Bronzy on May 15, 2019, 03:53:09 AM
I love this so much.

https://youtube.com/watch?v=Wkm5i6e8JGU
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: HeyJude on June 15, 2019, 12:06:18 AM
I realize I'm late to the party, but I just noticed something for the first time.

MMMWAP series 2, episode 1, when Alan is singing the Prayer of St Francis, his lyrics are:

"O Master grant that I may never seek
so much seek to be controlled as to control"

Control instead of console, which changes the entire meaning.  Brilliant.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Nuts 'n Gum on July 13, 2019, 01:40:57 AM
The bit in Partridge over Britain when Alan speaks to David Silk on the phone and asks him 'David, are you wearing any silk?' and he says 'no I'm naked'. The look on Alan's face is priceless. That's my funniest ever Partridge moment.
Yes! This. I'm making my first post on here in years I love that quote so much.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Twed on July 14, 2019, 01:59:16 PM
I realize I'm late to the party, but I just noticed something for the first time.

MMMWAP series 2, episode 1, when Alan is singing the Prayer of St Francis, his lyrics are:

"O Master grant that I may never seek
so much seek to be controlled as to control"

Control instead of console, which changes the entire meaning.  Brilliant.
Wonderful observation! Wow. (sorry if that sounds sarcastic, I really mean it)
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Dave The Triffids on July 30, 2019, 01:54:07 PM
Joined up here just to enter into this conversation – I've been watching a lot of Mid Morning Matters recently and it really is a hotbed of obscure, piss-funny quotes.

"Now though, some music from the artist formerly known as the Artist Formerly Known As Prince; now known formally, and informally, as Prince.
Sorry, it's Yazoo… I mean Yazz."

For Alan to get it wrong once is funny – to get it wrong twice in the same sentence is fantastic scriptwriting. 


Also, has no one mentioned that nervous swallowing thing Alan does?  I absolutely love that.  One of my favourite examples, when Angela demands Freddie the dog back: 


Alan: Only the other night, I was taking him out in the garden for a piddle, and he looked up at me, as if to say, "You're better than this, Alan.. and whatever happens, I will always be your friend.”

Simon: I bet you wanted to hug him.

Alan: Yeah. When I turned round he was over by the bins eating some pat..*HUGE SWALLOW* pate.


Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: robhug on July 30, 2019, 04:20:32 PM
If no-one's mentioned it yet, I always like the exchange with the estate agent about the school near the house, because at the time I was helping design a school with a hearing-impaired unit and during every meeting I was resisting the temptation to check that they were 'just deaf... they're not deaf offenders.'

Re 'The Deaf', whenever one is pointed out whether in my personal or professional life I will immediately ask for confirmation that they are just deaf and not deaf offenders.

Its an affiliation that does me absolutely no favours.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: QDRPHNC on July 30, 2019, 04:53:27 PM
Welcome, Dave. Cracking first post.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Fisher Goes Berserk on July 30, 2019, 05:06:36 PM
Also, has no one mentioned that nervous swallowing thing Alan does?  I absolutely love that.

Makes me laugh every time. I think my favourite is "Yeaaah, think I'll go read Simon Heffer... on the veranda... ain't no-one gonna stop me... KKGGHH-urgh."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: FerriswheelBueller on July 30, 2019, 05:18:00 PM
He has a good one in MMM during the faux Inland Revenue on-air climb-down as well, I seem to remember.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Cuellar on July 30, 2019, 05:18:53 PM
"Now though, some music from the artist formerly known as the Artist Formerly Known As Prince; now known formally, and informally, as Prince.
Sorry, it's Yazoo… I mean Yazz."

Definitely one of my favourite bits - his descent from smug satisfaction at his wordplay to completing ballsing it up TWICE is great.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: FerriswheelBueller on July 30, 2019, 06:59:23 PM
The whole “Wayne Wooney - top one!” dialogue, including the sad trumpet noise at the end from MMM
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: oy vey on July 30, 2019, 10:36:58 PM
Anglian Lives is seriously underrated. Some of the best Partridge, ever. Probably the best IAP-era Partridge full stop.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U5KH-vxNc6g "Part 2" especially. The hawker, the way he says "throat cancer" in a French accent. The hawker's really funny jokes (super kestrel). Alan's extreme annoyance with the plane crash/supermodel cannibalism caller. That in particular shows a part of Alan's character that I think is great: he's actually quite an intelligent person, despite being socially oblivious. He's often annoyed with other people being slower than him.

Absolutely, superior to the similarly styled Open Books. Lots of low key yet sublime one-liners. They put raisins in their currys. Bloody awful. But they deliver.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: robhug on July 31, 2019, 09:59:47 AM
I will be the first to hold my hands up and say in the past, circa 1983, i developed a robust dislike for the gay community, but that was before i met Dale Winton. And i realised i had absolutely nothing to worry about
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Huxleys Babkins on July 31, 2019, 10:14:27 AM
"I actually spent 3 days at the Earls Court Boat Show with Dale Winton, Paul O’Grady and Noel Edmonds…he’s not gay but you get the picture."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: robhug on July 31, 2019, 10:19:16 AM
If you’d have told me 25 years ago that I was going to be talking about rigid inflatable hulls with Dale Winton, i’d probably have spat at you.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: buttgammon on July 31, 2019, 11:39:57 AM
One of the gayest men in Europe.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: buttgammon on August 04, 2019, 12:54:26 AM
Hot, hot, hot, hot, hot, hot, hot, hot ham.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: The Lurker on August 04, 2019, 05:39:58 AM
It's me on me, on Alan on Alan, on I on I, on Partridge on Partridge
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Autopsy Turvey on August 06, 2019, 10:02:06 PM
"Your holes are too big to catch the Nobel Peace Prize fish of Literature."

"Organ malfunctions."

"Ally 'Arris"

Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: robhug on August 07, 2019, 10:19:54 AM
"Your holes are too big to catch the Nobel Peace Prize fish of Literature."

Alan:
It's a big fish. Your net's full of holes.
Lawrence:
All nets are full of holes.
Alan:
Granted.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: oy vey on August 08, 2019, 05:56:49 PM
Has the ramble been posted yet? There's an extract in Anglian Lives but here's the full whack: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DBiJDmkpZQc

So much in this. The pause before Francis Rossi of Status Quo, the I am not Jesus controversy, the vending machines in hedges, the poignant ending...
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Dave The Triffids on August 12, 2019, 03:39:18 PM
Has the ramble been posted yet? There's an extract in Anglian Lives but here's the full whack: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DBiJDmkpZQc

So much in this. The pause before Francis Rossi of Status Quo, the I am not Jesus controversy, the vending machines in hedges, the poignant ending...

Yeah, the bit at the end where his voice cracks when he sings "I'm A One Man Band" is fantastic. 

I also love the way he says "..about the size of a slim Panatella" when discussing the contents of the hedgerow vending machines.  (Panatella being a word I probably haven't heard since the 1980's) 
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Dave The Triffids on August 12, 2019, 03:40:57 PM
This band are the words I said to my girlfriend last week on her birthday; UB40... Four

Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on August 12, 2019, 03:46:52 PM
Has the ramble been posted yet? There's an extract in Anglian Lives but here's the full whack: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DBiJDmkpZQc

So much in this. The pause before Francis Rossi of Status Quo, the I am not Jesus controversy, the vending machines in hedges, the poignant ending...
Very nice. I have never seen the full clip before. That is top quality Partridge.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: the on August 12, 2019, 04:02:12 PM
I also love the way he says "..about the size of a slim Panatella" when discussing the contents of the hedgerow vending machines.  (Panatella being a word I probably haven't heard since the 1980's)

In the rally driving item in The Day Today, he also compares the size of the helmet camera he's wearing to a slim Panatella. Something of a touchstone.

The Christmas ramble was originally produced for 1994's A Christmas Night With The Stars, albeit in a shorter edit to the one on the KMKY DVD extras (which is where that YT version is from). It also had the studio audience's laughter over it.

The Partridge contribution to that show was the best thing about it (with the possible exception of Fry & Laurie's links). Considering the 1994-era talent contributing to the show (R&M, The Fast Show, Alexei Sayle), it was a bit of a damp squib.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: pish on August 13, 2019, 06:09:51 PM
Compleme Cunm
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on August 13, 2019, 06:18:17 PM
In the rally driving item in The Day Today, he also compares the size of the helmet camera he's wearing to a slim Panatella. Something of a touchstone.
Yes, I knew I recognised it from somewhere. Great that they have a kind of consistency to this. It's why he's such an enduring character (and why The Time with...) didn't work for me.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: oy vey on August 13, 2019, 06:50:34 PM
(and why The Time with...) didn't work for me.

Mmmmhmmm yes. I do like TT, but it's all over the place.

Conversely, the earlier laughter free stuff proved Alan's depth and versatility pre-Gibbons.

It also had the studio audience's laughter over it.

I don't want to get bogged down in the whole laughter nest of vipers, etc. Good catch on the panatella.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on September 18, 2019, 09:07:43 PM
In Nomad (I was listening to the audiobook on the way home) he talks about Michael Portillo:

I thought he was smiling, but it was just the way his face hangs. Footnote: Geoffrey Hayes from Rainbow had the same thing.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: kalowski on September 18, 2019, 09:09:51 PM
And there's a bit about him holding a torch in his mouth, detective style. "It would have worked better if it was a pencil light, but it was a large Mag-lite. My mouth was stretched like when the cleaner's not been and all you have is a dessert spoon."
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Bazooka on September 20, 2019, 09:30:48 AM
Very nice. I have never seen the full clip before. That is top quality Partridge.

What a treat it must be to have only just seen this.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Huxleys Babkins on September 20, 2019, 09:48:23 AM
In the rally driving item in The Day Today, he also compares the size of the helmet camera he's wearing to a slim Panatella. Something of a touchstone.

That bit still annoys me as the camera is clearly not the size of a panatella. It's more like a proper full-sized cigar like the ones Jimmy Savile smoked, the only full-sized thing he ever sucked for pleasure.
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Gulftastic on September 20, 2019, 10:43:43 AM
That bit still annoys me as the camera is clearly not the size of a panatella. It's more like a proper full-sized cigar like the ones Jimmy Savile smoked, the only full-sized thing he ever sucked for pleasure.

Don't under sell how much of a monster Savile was. Like a track suit clad Bishop of Bath and Wells, animal, vegetable or mineral, he'd do anything to anything. Calling him just a peado is actually doing his memory a favour
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: Bad Ambassador on September 20, 2019, 11:51:00 AM
Rewatched IAP2 this week, and it's most quite poor, but the jingle for Alan's Love Asylum provoked some unexpected hilarity.

"Alan's... Love... Asylum!" *anguished wail*
Title: Re: Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon
Post by: oy vey on September 20, 2019, 02:05:57 PM
Chris Tarrant. I saw him the other day actually. I said, "Chris, who wants to be a millionaire. Not you, you already are one you big cock."