'Alternative' Warfare Anyone?

[shit as fuck]

http://www.thememoryhole.org/mil/nl-weapons_terms/

Wow, the Memory Hole has come up trumps for once.  Theyve got a list of 'non-lethal' (now called 'less-lethal' presumably because they kept killing people) weapons in use by the US armed forces.

They include, to my absolute delight, a gun that uses low frequency sound waves , possibly to make people shit themselves!  My college physics teacher used to claim that he'd worked for the MoD and been involved in developing that same weapon.  I thought he was stark raving mad at the time (which he actually did later turn out to be), but it seems he was telling the truth!

How fucking cool would it be if all future wars were fought with guns like that?  No risk of death any more, just massive embarassment.  Success would no-longer be based on air-superiority or how many tanks youve got but how good your sides' supplies of clean pants are.  Brilliant!

Anyone else got any good ideas for 'alternative' warfare?//

[Purple Tentacle]

An old friend of mine in the Navy claimed to have tested a sonic weapon that was designed to knock a pilot unconcious in their cockpit, causing the plane to crash.  Whether this was bollocks or not I have no idea.


The "sick sticks" in Minority Report were a fucking fantastic idea. (You prod someone with an electrical stick which causes them to vomit violently, effectively disabling them.)

[Pinball]

That sound technology has been in development for at least 10 years, so I suspect is fully operational now just top secret. It's possible to aim ultrasonic weapons at crowds and target individuals. They suffer nausea and vomiting, and I think abdominal pain, and collapse to the ground. Blinding lasers are another delightful weapon, although supposedly banned. There's also new imaging techniques using same technology as those airport scanners that see through clothing. It will replace intense intensification night vision, which the US military subvert with special mists (so that enemy combatants can't see anything, even with night vision).

So many creative ways to harm and hurt people. God bless America.

[shit as fuck]

I'd forgotten how cool they were.  Better still would be a baton that could make you have an instant orgasm.  Not as messy (for those around you at least) and presumably longer lasting than vomiting reflexes.  Also good was that sonic shotgun thing, actually very possible in reality as well, if you could find a way to power the damn thing.

[Captain Crunch]

This looks appropriate and damn good veiwing:
http://www.channel4.com/life/microsites/C/crazy_rulers/index.html

[shit as fuck]

Yeah, saw that advetised late last night, looks really good.

[Dusty Gozongas]

http://www.thememoryhole.org/mil/nl-weapons_terms/
They include, to my absolute delight, a gun that uses low frequency sound waves , possibly to make people shit themselves! //

Handy.  And not a million miles removed from the soundbites that got somebody the job of running a schlooperpower recently.  Different gun, same effect.

[zozman]

http://www.thememoryhole.org/mil/nl-weapons_terms/
They include, to my absolute delight, a gun that uses low frequency sound waves , possibly to make people shit themselves! //

Handy.  And not a million miles removed from the soundbites that got somebody the job of running a schlooperpower recently.  Different gun, same effect.

A cork?

[Elastic Spastic Shashlik]

Whatever happened to the 'super-suit' the Americans were developing for their soldiers?  Supposedly, the technology is there and it works, but at  $1million per suit is not yet viable.

Apparently, parts of the suit can stiffen and compress at your command to act as a cast for broken bones or to stop blood flowing from open wounds. The fabric is also supposed to be resistant to bullet penetration and fireproof. It's can also maintain any temperature, sort of like climate control, so that the soldier is always confortable whatever the weather condition. There was even talk of a rocket pack type device that would allow soldiers to jump up onto buildings or jump down from high points.

The aim is to make a US super-soldier whose power and invulnerability would strike fear into the hearts of the enemy.

It would be as cool as fuck.

[Dusty Gozongas]

A cork?

Are you asking me or telling me?

[hencole]

Games Workshop have had those for years.

[shit as fuck]

Hmmn, reminds me of those Nazi-propaganda film clips from 'The Rocketeer'.

come to think of it I think Hitler did actually try to develop such a weapon in order to invade Russia, Britain and the US.  Thank fuck he didnt.

[shit as fuck]

http://www.gizmo.com.au/go/3062/

US soldiers wearing nano-tech body armour that would - to all intents and purposes- make them invulnerable.  Be afraid.

They could literally take over the whole world with a weapon like that.

[Pinball]

http://www.gizmo.com.au/go/3062/

US soldiers wearing nano-tech body armour that would - to all intents and purposes- make them invulnerable.  Be afraid.

They could literally take over the whole world with a weapon like that.

Already done.

I wonder if the US could develop a weapon that forces other people to like them? ;-)

[Dusty Gozongas]

They could literally take over the whole world with a weapon like that.

Luckily, those suits are occasionally useless against pockets of resistance, insurgents, the Iraqi army and malcontents.  Some people are still smiling, bless 'em.

[Captain Crunch]

I wonder if the US could develop a weapon that forces other people to like them? ;-)

Like Jean Paul Gaultier for men or a huge bag of jelly babies.

[shit as fuck]

I wonder if the US could develop a weapon that forces other people to like them? ;-)

iPods.

[InfiniteFury]

http://www.gizmo.com.au/go/3062/

US soldiers wearing nano-tech body armour that would - to all intents and purposes- make them invulnerable. Be afraid.

They could literally take over the whole world with a weapon like that.

Until they walk straight into an EMP blast zone and then I imagine they might become rather cumbersome...

[Almost Yearly]

The worst thing about losing a jet fighter obviously isn't the pilot. He's just a token bit of flesh in a multimillion pound vehicle. It's the material loss that hurts. I can't really see what he's doing there at all - surely he could be back at base wearing his heads up display in the canteen, flying the mission from there. And then why have the planes at all? Just wire the opposing pilots together and they can dogfight to their hearts content. The UN server keeps score and announces the winner. Bingo.

Ahem.

[InfiniteFury]

Is there a film or a computer game where people don't actually fight each other, they're just plugged into computers which kill them if they lose in "combat"

Or is that my fevered imagination. It's just creeping up on me, possibly something like Universal Soldier - that sort of thing.

[shit as fuck]

The worst thing about losing a jet fighter obviously isn't the pilot. He's just a token bit of flesh in a multimillion pound vehicle. It's the material loss that hurts.

I beg to differ, they spend millions training those chaps.  A pilot whose been in service for some time is probably worth more than the plane itself.  But then again these days pilots, even on the increasingly rare occasions when they do actually get hit, very rarely die.  Modern air-air missiles and many air-ground missiles are not capable of engulfing an entire fighter in flames so much as they just shred the engines and take off bits of wing/control surfaces so the plane becomes more or less useless.  The pilot doesnt even have to rush pulling the ejector in most cases.  Now they have the computing power to take advantage of it, missiles are designed with only speed and maneuverability in mind.

The exception would be big ground-air missiles that are designed to anihilate stuff because they might need to take down a cruise missile or something just as nasty.  Like the Patriot missile, which famously killed a Tornado crew in Iraq.

[flumphead]

On the flipside: I personally love the idea of an extension to the Geneva convention to permit only the use of sword and bow like weapons.  Far cheaper, no environmental damage and much more manly.  Perhaps the countries that break these rules could be nuked by Kofi Annan.

[falafel]

Is there a film or a computer game where people don't actually fight each other, they're just plugged into computers which kill them if they lose in "combat"

Or is that my fevered imagination. It's just creeping up on me, possibly something like Universal Soldier - that sort of thing.

The Matrix?

[InfiniteFury]

Nah, I'm sure it was a really crap Universal Soldier style film. I can't remember why it was better to not have them facing each other on the battlefield but there was a bloomin' good reason...

Thanks for the suggestion though.

[Mit]

Is there a film or a computer game where people don't actually fight each other, they're just plugged into computers which kill them if they lose in "combat"

i reckon you're probably thinking of an episode of the original Star Trek. Shatner and his buddies beamed down to some planet and couldnt work out why occasionally half the population would disappear into lil booths and voluntarily be killed. A computer was simulating thier conflicts and inacting the resulting casualties - a system they believed to be more advanced than actual warfare as it didnt destroy buildings & the environment. For a while it was one of those fine star trek episodes full of interesting moral dilemmas and suchlike but im pretty sure in the end they were talked round to doing things the good ole american way.

[king_tubby]

Is there a film or a computer game where people don't actually fight each other, they're just plugged into computers which kill them if they lose in "combat"

One of the Bond films....argh, can't remember....A View to a Kill?

(I'm quite prepared to stand corrected on this)

[Jet Set Willy]

Soldiers will be able to chat online with each other while they are walking down a jungle trail.

I HATE RAGHEADS says: YO I CAN C SUM1 THERE
RaPeMaStEr says: is it a raghead lol
I HATE RAGHEADS says: LOL
RaPeMaStEr says: yo mama is a raghead lol
I HATE RAGHEADS says: FUCK U N00B
RaPeMaStEr says: i raped yo mama
I HATE RAGHEADS says: YO MAMA IS A RAGHEAD
RaPeMaStEr says: i m hardcore, i hav raped 14 raghead grlz
I HATE RAGHEADS says: WHATEVER
RaPeMaStEr says: did u say u saw sum1 there?
I HATE RAGHEADS says: y....

---END OF COMMUNICATION---

[hymen spaz]

all this futureistic weaponry and solider combat future wapon warrior stuff reall does make me want to join the army - it just looks so much fun (apart from getting shot by the Americans friendly fire obviuosly, as they would be the only people with the technology todestroy the future suits)

[Santa's Boyfriend]

http://www.thememoryhole.org/mil/nl-weapons_terms/
They include, to my absolute delight, a gun that uses low frequency sound waves , possibly to make people shit themselves! //

Handy.  And not a million miles removed from the soundbites that got somebody the job of running a schlooperpower recently.  Different gun, same effect.

Surely if you just take a shit before going into battle you'll be ok?

[flumphead]

...I HATE RAGHEADS says: WHATEVER
RaPeMaStEr says: did u say u saw sum1 there?
I HATE RAGHEADS says: y....

---END OF COMMUNICATION---

in addition to target identification & comms they could have system generated reward messages for consecutive cappings.
M M M M MULTIKILL!
RAMPAGE!
GODLIKE!